Wild Dreams

by Dawn Pendleton

  “Because it was the name of the talking cat in some stupid kids Halloween movie from the nineties,” Tyler supplied the answer.

  Nicole sat up. “It wasn’t stupid.”

  “It was her favorite movie when we were kids. She wanted to be the little girl in the movie,” Tyler exposed her secret in a whisper.

  “I hate you.”

  I held back a laugh, but only because she looked so upset. Instead of laughing, I offered her a hand up.

  “The movie was great. There were some amazing actresses in it, and even if I did want to be Dani, that doesn’t make me a bad person or anything. Don’t be such a douche, Tyler.” She gave him the evil eye.

  “Easy, killer. No one’s judging,” I said, putting my hands up. “We all have our favorites. I’m a sucker for Top Gun, personally. But I’m calling it a day for shooting.”

  “What? It’s not even noon,” Nicole protested, ignoring my Top Gun comment. “There’s plenty of daylight left.”

  “You’re probably right, but I don’t think we’re going to get the photos we need with them in the den. I have an idea for us to try drawing them out tomorrow.”

  “Oh, well okay then.” Nicole didn’t look happy about it, but she didn’t argue, which surprised me.

  We made our way back to our camping spot, with me leading the way, Nicole in the middle, and Tyler bringing up the rear. When we were less than a mile away, I noticed Tyler was slowing.

  “Ty, you okay?”

  He coughed. “Yeah, I think so. Just a little head cold or something, I think.”

  Illnesses in the jungle weren’t to be messed with. In fact, something as simple as a head cold could turn deadly if not appropriately handled. “We’re about a mile out. Can you make it?”

  “Oh yeah,” he agreed, making an honest effort to pick up the pace.

  I kept on, but noticed how worried Nicole looked. I knew Tyler was important to her, but I also knew staying calm was key, for his sake and hers. We walked the mile slowly, as I didn’t want to strain Tyler’s immune system, but once there, Tyler sat on the log and let his pack drop onto the ground behind him. His eyes looked heavy and I thought he might pass out at any moment.

  “Let’s get the tent back up,” I spoke to Nicole.

  She nodded, helping me get the tent up without any arguments. Once she had Tyler’s sleeping bag set up, I went through my first aid kit, found a bottle of Vitamin C and handed Tyler three pills.

  “What’s this?”

  “You’re immune system is failing. Vitamin C will help. I don’t have anything else that would help,” I explained.

  He nodded, accepted the water bottle I held out to him and swallowed the pills. Nicole and I helped him into the tent and while she tucked him in, I rummaged nearby for twigs and wood for a fire. I wanted to make something for us to eat, but I also wanted to boil up some water and let him have some tea. I always kept a few tea bags in my food pack for when I felt under the weather. To date, I’d never used any of them. By the time Nicole came out of the tent, I had a nice fire going and was boiling water.

  “Where’d you get the pot?” she asked, sitting next to me on the log.

  “I always keep a small pot in my bag.”

  “It’s like the never-ending bag. You have everything in there,” she commented. I could tell she was worried, trying to distract herself.

  “I usually have everything I could possibly ever need. I’m making Tyler some tea.”

  “Good luck getting him to drink it. He was sick when we were kids and he’s the worst patient.”

  I winked at her. “I’m pretty persuasive.”

  “Well, that’s true,” she agreed, shaking her head.

  “Don’t worry about him. I’m sure it’s just from traveling. I spent my entire first year at the magazine sick because of all the traveling I did. Eventually, your body gets used to it. Just in case, I always load up on vitamins.”

  “Yeah, you’re as healthy as a horse.”

  “Thanks for noticing,” I said, letting out a whinny like a horse.

  She shook her head at me, a sad smile crossing her mouth.

  “Hey,” I said, taking her hand in mine. “He’s going to be okay.”

  She didn’t reply; she just stared into the flames, as if she knew my promise was empty. Not even I was capable of controlling the illness that was wreaking havoc on Tyler’s immune system. I felt helpless, even though I did everything I possibly could to help out. I wanted to be the hero, wanted her to look up at me with those green pretty eyes in awe, but even I knew how unlikely that was.

  When the tea was ready, Nicole insisted she take it in to Tyler, even though I was more persuasive. I agreed, but only after I told her she needed a mask. I pulled a bandana out of my pack, folded it up neatly and then tied it over her mouth and nose.

  “Is this really necessary?” she grumbled.

  “Yes. With one of us sick, you and I can still put together a makeshift bed to carry him on. If you’re both sick, I can’t get both of you out of here at the same time. It’s not ideal to have to leave either of you alone if you’re sick. We need to be careful,” I explained.

  She nodded but didn’t reply, taking the tea into the tent. I heard her whisper to Tyler and his groggy response, but I knew it was a losing battle. If he wasn’t better by morning, the trip was over and we’d have to return. It wasn’t ideal, but if he needed medical attention, it was our only option.

  She left the tent a few minutes later with an empty cup. “He drank it all.”

  “How’s he look?” I asked.

  “Like shit. He’s running a low fever and he says he has a headache. When I asked him to sit up, it looked like he was hurting.”

  “Wow, that’s really fast. Whatever it is, it’s burning through his immune system.”

  “Yeah, I don’t like it. Are we going to be able to get him the help he needs?” She sounded worried.

  “If he’s not feeling better by morning, we’re going to hike to the Jeep and get him medical help. I can only do so much.”

  “I’m not going to lie, I feel better knowing he’s going to see a doctor. I’m worried about him. He doesn’t usually get sick,” she told me.

  “I’ve known him for years and I’ve never seen him have so much as a sore throat or a runny nose. It’s freaking me out to see him out like that. And it happened so fast.”

  She nodded. “Exactly.”

  “We’ll take care of him,” I promised, not sure if there was really anything we could even do. I wanted him to get better so the trip could continue, but I knew he needed the medical attention.

  “He’s sleeping now,” she started. “I guess there’s nothing we can do until tomorrow.”

  “We can talk,” I suggested, even though it was the last thing on my mind.

  Her eyes met mine. “I don’t want to talk.”

  And then she straddled my hips and kissed me.

  Fourteen

  Nicole

  I couldn’t help myself. We were both helpless; neither of us could do anything more for Tyler than what we’d already done. It was already too late in the day to try to make it back to the Jeep. We could go fast, but that would only exhaust both of us and we would have to carry Tyler, which would definitely slow us down. Hiking halfway back and then setting up camp elsewhere wasn’t a bad idea, but I didn’t want to have to move Tyler twice. One uncomfortable move and then we would be on the road back to the magazine, or a hospital.

  I didn’t even know if they had hospitals in the middle of the jungle. I was naïve, completely ignorant. I grew up with access to health care on a regular basis and it never even occurred to me that out in the middle of the jungle, doctors were probably few and far between.

  So I kissed him. I didn’t just kiss him, though; I attacked his mouth. I wanted to feel something other than the helplessness that consumed me. I wanted to feel alive. I slipped my tongue in his mouth, deepening the kiss. He growled, his hands digging into my hips. I didn’t m
ind. I liked the feel of his fingertips; it helped me forget the pain in my heart. He pulled up my shirt, his hands meeting the flesh above my jeans. He moved them up along my spine, causing my skin to erupt in goose bumps.

  I pressed my pelvis closer to him, enjoying the feel of the bulge beneath his pants. His moan let me know I was on the right track. I might not want to sleep with him just yet, but I definitely wanted more of his mouth, and maybe more of him in my mouth. With his hands on my back, he pulled me closer, our mouths parting as I rose up higher than him. His lips explored my neck, his tongue tasting the sensitive skin near my life vein. He dropped his head lower, his chin dipping between my breasts. I shuddered at the contact.

  He pressed light kisses along my collarbone, the pressure so soft, he was tickling me more than kissing me. I pushed myself closer to him, anxious for more of the sweet torment. I turned my head up to the sky, barely visible over the overhang of trees above. I watched a few clouds pass as Dallas continued to kiss my skin. His hands slipped out from my shirt and along the backs of my thighs. He picked me up, forcing my legs around his waist completely. I locked my ankles behind his back and moved my own hands to his chest.

  He smiled darkly at me. “I want you.”

  His admission made my throat go dry. I wasn’t sure I was ready to take it that far yet. Instead of answering, I moved my lips to his again, not wanting to ruin the moment. I was wanted and for just a minute, I let myself believe I was loved.

  His hand fisted in my hair and he tugged me back. His eyes searched mine. “You’re not ready.”

  Tears welled up in my eyes at my own weakness. No matter how much I wanted him, I couldn’t sleep with him yet. I shook my head.

  “I’d never force myself or make you think you didn’t have a choice, Nicole. No is always an option, no matter how far we get. I do want you, and I think it’s important for you to know that, but you only have to tell me to stop and we’ll stop.”

  His words made my heart clench. “I don’t want to stop just yet.” I forced the words out, the truth was hard to admit. I didn’t want to leave him hurting, either.

  “Then we’ll continue. Until you say the word,” he added, his eyes dark with passion.

  I gulped. He kissed me again, his tongue taking absolute possession. He owned me. If he wanted to, he could have easily convinced me to sleep with him right there in the dirt, but he wanted more than a quick lay, and so did I. I knew from his kiss what his angle was: he wanted to drive me fucking crazy. He wanted to make me want him so bad I couldn’t stand it. His plan was working. I was already so wet, I figured he could feel me through our clothes. I did want him. But something pulled me back, made me rethink my own desires.

  Fear.

  I wasn’t the kind of girl who projected fear in any part of my life, except sexually. I was experienced, sure, but after the slew of boyfriends I’d gone through, I had my hang ups. In fact, I was less than confident when it came to my body. My last boyfriend never had a compliment for me, not that I needed them to live or anything, but he continually put me down instead. It was annoying, but what bothered me more was that I actually began to believe him. Maybe you should lose a little weight, babe. Your jeans are a little tight. I started feeling like a kid being reprimanded. When he started to try to control exactly what I ate, I got out of there fast.

  But his words fucked up my head, made me doubt myself. And then, of course, there was the fact that he fucked two of my friends behind my back…

  Dallas pulled away, looking me in the eye. “God, you’re beautiful.” His eyes roamed my face and then stopped back at my eyes. “I’m not sure I’ve ever met someone as beautiful as you.”

  It was as if he could hear my nagging thoughts and wanted to soothe my fears of not being pretty enough. I closed my eyes, trying not to tear up again.

  “Look at me,” he demanded.

  It took me a few seconds, but when I opened my eyes, his face was intense.

  “You are drop dead gorgeous,” he started. “But I’m not just talking about your face or body. Your beauty is so much more than that. It starts inside. Your soul shines brighter than any physical attribute you have. It’s pure and true and even if this moment is all we ever get, I’ll remember it for the rest of my life and know that I’ll never meet someone as amazing as you. I feel like I’ve known you far longer than just a day.”

  His words floated around my brain, healing pieces of me I didn’t even know were broken. I wanted to thank him, to tell him how much his words meant to me, but I couldn’t speak. Tears appeared again, but I didn’t even notice until he wiped them away with the pad of his thumb.

  “Don’t cry, Nicole.”

  “Nic,” I said, certain I didn’t make any sense. “My friends call me Nic.”

  He smiled. “Well, Nic, I don’t want you to cry anymore.”

  Again, he delved into the deep recesses of my mind and pulled out another one of my insecurities. Crying was a weakness, according to every guy I ever dated. Most of them didn’t have a clue what to do when I cried, let alone how to comfort me. Dallas’s words found my fears and vanquished them. I was awed by his intuition.

  “I don’t want to cry, either,” I admitted. “How did you know?”

  “Know what?”

  I eyed him suspiciously. “How did you know what I needed to hear?”

  “It wasn’t hard to guess, Nic. Your face is an open book, for the most part. I think you try to close yourself off because you’re afraid to show any signs of weakness, but I can see it plain as day. I usually don’t pay any attention to what I see in the faces of the women I’m interested in, but you’re different. That scares me.”

  “It scares me, too.”

  He tucked a stray hair behind my ear. “I don’t want to be afraid. Not with you.”

  “I don’t either, but I’m not sure if I can take any leaps so soon,” I confessed in a whisper.

  He tilted his head. “Then we’ll go extra slow.” He helped me off his lap and then stood in front of me. “It’s too good to waste or go too fast. I want to drag out every kiss, every first with you. And if we never get farther than kissing, I’m okay with that, too. I want it to be perfect for you.”

  He wants perfection for me? I was floored. No guy had ever made anything about me. They all always thought about their own pleasure and needs. And it wasn’t as if Dallas was any different; his reputation spoke volumes. I wondered if what he was doing was how he hooked the women in his life. I suddenly doubted every one of his words.

  It was like a switch was turned on and I saw him for who he truly was. Liar. Manipulator. Womanizer. I couldn’t believe him, regardless of how much I wanted to. It was too risky. Sure, his words were nice to hear, and I would take them and make myself better, stronger, but I didn’t want to let my guard down completely. I had to protect my most valuable asset: my heart.

  I turned away from him and walked to the edge of the clearing. Even putting that small space between us had my head clearing further. I remembered the blogs I’d come across when researching Dallas’s previous interns.

  In less than two days, he had me convinced I was in love with him…

  I felt like the only woman in the world he was attracted to…

  As soon as he got in my pants, he dropped me, no longer caring if I succeeded in the industry…

  Once he got what he wanted, I meant nothing to him…

  I felt used, as if I didn’t even matter. Leanne’s words about him played over and over in my mind, too. My heart didn’t want to believe it, but my mind knew better. I was being played.

  I felt his presence behind me before I heard him. He wrapped his arms around me, his chin resting on my shoulder. “You okay?”

  “I’m fine,” I answered, my body stiffening against him.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked, his hand on my shoulders turning me toward him.

  “Not a thing,” I said, forcing a smile.

  “Liar. Talk to me.”

  I sighed.
“I just get the feeling you’re feeding me the right lines to get what you want.”

  He stepped back. “Are you serious? You think I would do that?”

  “Isn’t that what you’ve always done in the past with your interns? Clarissa, Monica, Amber… Do I need to go on?” I narrowed my eyes at him.

  He opened his mouth to speak but closed it again. He was silent for a full sixty seconds before he spoke. “You’re right about who I used to be. I did use women. I told them exactly what they wanted to hear in order to get them naked. And I understand your apprehension. But think about this: the things I said to you weren’t to get in your pants. In fact, I suggested slowing down. Do you really think that if sex was all I cared about with you, I would have done that? Don’t answer me,” he said when I started to reply. “Just think about it.” He walked away, back to the fire. He grabbed a long stick to use as a poker and adjusted the wood engulfed in flames.

  I stared at him, more unsure than I’d ever been. Was I stupid for second-guessing him? Hell if I knew. Everything in my mind was jumbled. I couldn’t clear my head, couldn’t assess reality from what I’d read in the blogs and what Leanne told me. Emotions tugged my heart and logic warped my brain. I was confused.

  Fifteen

  Dallas

  The next morning, Tyler was worse.

  For the sake of my own sanity, I slept with my back to Nicole, careful not to touch her at all throughout the night. Her accusation hurt, but I should have expected it. I did have a reputation. I was the playboy, the guy who got women to sleep with him for no reason at all except his own selfish pleasure. But she changed all that. Doesn’t she see that? I guessed she did, but had her doubts. I couldn’t blame her, not really. With everything that happened in the past two days, she was right to question me. Oh, I wanted her to have faith, to believe in me, but I knew she had her own relationship issues.

  I could tell she had trouble trusting men just by the way she acted. She over projected her own confidence. I liked it, but it wasn’t the real Nicole. She was far shyer, far more reserved than she let on. It was when she was quiet that I could tell she did her real assessments of a situation. She was deadly with that sexy brain of hers. She also wasn’t a mindless intern I could manipulate. Not that I was trying. I knew better. She’d see right through it. Hell, I was brutally honest with her the night before and she still questioned my loyalty.