by Kelly, G. E.
“What behavior are you worried about?” she questioned him, concerned.
“It’s a house full of guys. You can never be sure everyone is fully dressed and there aren’t clothes everywhere. Don’t worry, they’ll shape up for you. That’s why we’re warning them first. When I left the house to come get you, I picked up a bit anyhow. It should be presentable enough for today,” Garrett piped up.
“Oh…okay.” Jaycee rose from Garrett’s lap, and headed toward the door. “I just want to say bye to Jonathan before we go.” Not expecting the guys to follow her, she’d attempted to close the door behind her. She turned around when she felt resistance. Garrett and Lee had stuck their feet in the door. They apparently wanted to join her. A guy on either side of her down the hall, Jaycee felt like they were going to confront a foe or charging into battle…instead of what they were truly doing: saying “see you later” to their friend.
The same nurse was still at the desk, but the guys simply bypassed her. Lee checked the doors looking for Jonathan. He located him two doors down, and pulled him into the hall.
“Jaycee wanted to say good-bye before we head out,” Lee told him.
“I hope you didn’t scare any of my patients,” Jonathan replied, worried.
“Only one other room was occupied, and the guy didn’t seem to mind. Jaycee’s in the waiting room. Make it quick, we need to get her back to the dorm.” At Jonathan’s look he quickly finished. “We’re having her get her things, so she can bring them to our place. We haven’t changed our minds. She’s gonna live with us.”
This seemed to pacify Jonathan. He seemed pleased Jaycee hadn’t wanted to leave without saying good-bye. He’d really had the least amount of time with her, and he was nervous about not getting enough time to bond with her like the other guys had. They followed the corridor around to the lobby. Jaycee sat to the right of Garrett. She’d folded her hands in her lap and was staring at them. Her feet moved in nervous circles around the chair legs.
“Jaycee.” Jonathan opened his arms not caring if anyone in the office saw. It was merely a hug, and he was an affectionate guy. Jaycee jumped from her chair, and flew into his arms. Lee and Garrett raised their brows, but didn’t comment. Lee simply snorted his amusement.
“Thanks for today,” she lowered her voice to a whisper and motioned for Jonathan to lean down to her level. “I guess I’ll see you later at the house.” Jaycee blushed, but managed a shy smile.
Jonathan couldn’t deny it. He was aroused. Not enough to show, thankfully, but her whispered words set his body on fire. Her innocence was cute and endearing. He would be counting the minutes the rest of his shift. He couldn’t wait to go home tonight and see her again.
Lopeholt (a safe place or refuge)
January 4, 2016
Jaycee spent most of their walk back to her dorm deep in thought. She couldn’t help but second-guess her decision to stay with the guys. One girl living with six guys did look bad, there was no way around it. They weren’t related. Honestly, they hadn’t even known each other long enough to constitute moving in together under regular circumstances, but then again hers weren’t regular. Her circumstances had never been regular. Most people didn’t lose their mom at two years old. They didn’t almost get kidnapped in a home invasion. They didn’t watch their father get hauled away in handcuffs at six years old. Most people would never know how alone and ostracized foster kids felt. How many people—families—out there used foster kids as free labor or a free paycheck. Sure there were good people in the world trying to help, but she’d never been lucky enough to be sent to live with them.
She reminded herself she would need to take risks. Staying huddled up in her shell would keep her safe, but it wouldn’t help her in the long run. She’d done it for too many years. Avoiding social situations, and anyone that could hurt her had kept her heart protected. Still, it had left her feeling lonelier and empty inside. Right now she had a chance to find herself. Finally, she had the freedom to figure out who she was without anyone telling her what she could and couldn’t do. Finally, she knew what she wanted to do. She wanted to be with the guys. Maybe it was a poor decision she’d come to regret, but it didn’t feel like it. Everything inside her heart—her soul—was telling her this was the right move to make. If she could only ignore her head. She could find a lopeholt: a place where she was safe and cared for.
Maybe her screwed-up life had led her to this moment. Maybe she needed more than one person in her life to make her feel loved, after so many people had torn her apart for so many years. She realized she had spent more time apart from her father than she had spent living with him. It hurt her to realize how much time they’d lost. To think about all the moments he’d missed, and all the advice she’d gone without. She would find a way to make it up to him. When she found the Wallners, she would be able to start planning how to free her father. Obviously, the government had an appeals process, but seeing as she was too young to remember the initial case…and she’d been forbidden from finding out the details…she wasn’t sure where to start.
Tonight she would get packed. That much was certain. It seemed a waste after she’d just gotten unpacked, but it couldn’t be helped. Unless, maybe she needed to give Sara one last chance. If Sara could explain to Jaycee why she had done it, and promise not to do it again…well maybe she would consider staying. At the very least she needed to explain to her roommate that she was leaving. The guys wouldn’t like it. They wanted her out of her dorm ASAP. They would have to learn to compromise on this. She couldn’t just leave without a word to Sara. The only reason she’d left her foster family without a word was because she’d had no other recourse. They wouldn’t have let her go. Sara was a different story. Jaycee decided to wait to tell Lee and Garrett her plans until they reached her room. That way they’d be less likely to pull her away from the room altogether.
Jaycee found it hard to act natural, like she wasn’t hiding a secret. Well, maybe not a secret, but a decision that would not be well received. She played with her phone, and adjusted her backpack so often the guys stopped to relieve her of them. Better they think she was feeling the weight of her stuff, rather than the weight of her decision. They reached her dorm, and stepped inside…up the stairs, and around to the hall. The steps to her room felt like miles, rather than a few feet away. Unlocking the door, Jaycee let the guys inside. Once again, the room was empty.
“Come on in. Most of what you see belongs to Sara. My stuff is in that dresser, the closet, and on that desk. It’s not too much to pack but…” Jaycee pointed to each item in turn, then grimaced and hesitated. “I’ve decided I want to stay—”
“Hell no,” Lee interrupted with a scowl. Garrett had his fists clinched but remained silent, listening for her explanation.
“I don’t mean forever. I just need to talk to Sara. Maybe we could work things out… maybe not, but at the very least I need to tell her I’m leaving before disappearing without a trace. We can still pack up my things…I’ve realized it doesn’t take long with help. Then we’ll just hang out and wait. When she shows up, I’ll have a little talk with her, and we’ll go from there.
“I don’t like this, Jaycee. You shouldn’t be staying or even be considering staying—” Lee added at her look of protest. He sighed, relenting. “I suppose as long as we stay with you, it should be all right. We can pack you up, figure out some dinner, and wait for Sara, if she shows. If not, you move in with us tomorrow. Deal?”
“Deal,” she agreed quickly, before she overthought it.
The time passed quickly as they packed. Jaycee did her best to hide her undergarments, but failed miserably when it came time to throw them in her suitcase with everything else. The boys did their best at pretending they didn’t see anything out of the ordinary…she hoped seeing women’s underwear wasn’t ordinary for them. Then she pulled out a pair of pink panties with red strawberries on them. The undies had been a present from her foster Mom. They hadn’t fit her personality, though the strawber
ries were cute. The guys happened to glance over and seemed far too riveted. Jaycee cleared her throat and the three resumed their former packing rhythm. Garrett did seem to have more color to his cheeks, however…
Dinnertime came quickly, but they managed to finish rounding up Jaycee’s belongings beforehand. Now the debate was on. Never ask a shy girl what she would like to eat. The answer will always be vague. But especially never ask a girl who is shy, and has a hard time making decisions. The guys were about to pull their hair out—and Lee didn’t have much length to pull on—when they decided to make up her mind for her. They’d suggest a place and gauge her reaction till they found one that didn’t get a grimace, but a smile instead. Delivery was one of the best things about living in a college town. Almost every food place delivered to campus. Even the little Italian place that served amazing chicken parm and to-die-for chicken Alfredo delivered.
Jaycee had made the guys leave her bedding for now. Partly she didn’t want to reveal her journal, but she also didn’t want to remake the bed if she decided to stay. Only intending to relax while they waited, Jaycee sat on the bed. Eventually, she laid down to wait for the food to arrive. Her eyes felt heavy, and slowly drifted shut.
A knock on the door woke Jaycee. She noted the guys were sitting on the bed on either side of her talking quietly. Lee went to the door and paid for their food.
“I can give you some money for my food. You don’t need to pay for me., Jaycee told him sleepily.
“It’s okay, little flower, you couldn’t eat me out of house and home,” he said, laughing at her suggestion.
“Lee inherited a fortune when his parents passed away. His brother didn’t want to keep anything,” Garrett whispered to Jaycee.
“He has a brother?” she asked.
“An older brother, Ji. He lives in Korea now,” Lee answered as he returned to the bedside.
“Sorry, I wasn’t trying to talk about you behind your back. I was just curious.” She looked chastened.
“Don’t be sorry, it’s okay. You can ask me whatever you’d like.” Lee brought the food back over, and set it on the bed beside them.
“Was your family originally from Asia?” She asked.
“My grandparents were, my parents were raised here, as were my brother and I,” Lee revealed.
“I’ve heard Korea mentioned several times. Is that where they were from?” Jaycee wanted to know everything about the guys. She was fascinated.
“My grandmother was Korean and my grandfather was of mixed blood. Ultimately, if you check my ancestry I’m a mix of most of the Asian cultures…of course, we identify most with Koreans. My brother went to live with our distant relatives, in Seoul, after I graduated high school. He wanted to be near family, but I didn’t want to leave the United States, so I stayed. I’ve gone to visit them a few times, but it’s not my home. Way too much bowing for my tastes,” Lee jested.
“It’s nice that you know your roots. I never got to learn much about my mother’s family. They were all gone before my mother married my father, and after…well, after I was put in foster care. I never found out if any of my father’s relatives were still alive. I think…If I remember correctly, my ancestors were from all over Europe, maybe even some Native American as well.”
“See you do have Asian then,” Lee commented.
“Huh?” she asked.
“You never heard? Some scientists theorized that Native Americans are just Asians that split off thousands of years ago…or something like that. Your eyes aren’t Asian, but your pale skin could be.” He waited to see her confused smile, before he laughed. “I’m just teasing you, little flower.”
“Ha! Where does your family hail from, Garrett?” Turning toward Garrett, Jaycee gave him her attention.
“All over Europe, but most recently the United Kingdom. I think I have a lot of German heritage. My family doesn’t pay much attention to ancestry though. They’re more ‘live in the present’ kind of people.” He shrugged.
“That’s okay. It does seem like Missouri has a lot of German heritage.” Jaycee took her plate from the takeout bag and passed the guys theirs. “Let’s eat while it’s hot.”
The food was delicious. They had even given her a bread stick with her pasta. “Yummmm.”
When their bellies were full and the trash was taken out, they settled in to watch Sara’s television. They put on a comedy about two people falling in and out of love. Jaycee snuggled between her friends. She laid her head on Lee’s shoulder, and held Garrett’s hand. She wondered if Sara was ever going to come home. Surely she’d have to get back sometime, right? You didn’t sign a contract with the housing association just to spend your nights elsewhere. Jaycee pondered, but couldn’t decide what she should do. It was too easy to just let the guys take over her life, and solve her problems, but would it be right? Of course, it wasn’t like she hadn’t figured things out on her own to start with. If she’d had a rule-abiding roommate there wouldn’t have been a problem in the first place, but it was all beyond her control. If she stayed, she would have to turn Sara in to the housing association, or risk another nighttime intruder. She’d give Sara till midnight…maybe she’d just take another nap.
Sometime during the night, Lee and Garrett had moved to the floor. They’d taken her extra sheet to use as a blanket, balling up towels for pillows. Laying on her stomach, somehow she was once again holding Garrett’s hand. Her arm was prickling from the loss of blood flow. She imagined Garrett’s arm was worse. Glancing at Sara’s desk clock, Jaycee noticed it was already two in the morning. Sara’s behavior was unpredictable. Jaycee had meant to give her a chance to defend her actions, but she also wasn’t in the habit of waiting around forever. What could the girl say that would actually make the situation better? Not much. Now was Jaycee’s time to figure out her own life, even if it meant moving out so quickly. Gently, Jaycee placed Garrett’s hand on his chest. She carefully rolled out of bed, and went to her side of the desk.
Pulling out a sheet of lined paper and a pen, she wrote Sara a note. She told her she wasn’t sure dorm life was for her. She’d make sure it didn’t reflect badly on Sara. That she had found another place off campus, and wished Sara all the best. Without a face-to-face, she couldn’t bring herself to mention the boyfriend situation, or why she was really moving out. At least now she wouldn’t have to constantly be worried about Sara overstepping her boundaries.
“You’re letting her off easy,” Lee spoke into her ear, causing Jaycee to let out a small squeak and jump in her seat. “Shhh, you’ll wake Garrett,” he teased her.
“You startled me! I thought you were asleep,” she said in a whisper.
“A good soldier is always aware of his surroundings,” he replied.
“I’m assuming you’re ready to move in with us then?” He asked her nonchalantly, but inside he was on edge. He wanted her to say yes, but he was trying not to push.
“I suppose I am. I hate not hashing things out with Sara, but at this rate who knows when I’ll see her. I have somewhere I need to go tomorrow…or rather, later today. I can’t keep vigil for her. Besides, I think the main reason I’m saying yes is…I don’t think we were going to get along. Sara and I, I mean. She clearly has a strong personality, and I’m afraid she would simply railroad me all the time. I’m not exactly good at standing up to people. I’ve spent my life avoiding confrontations. No, you guys were right…I can’t stay. And why should I? Your house is lovely, and if you all want me there, well, we’ll just have to figure out how to make it work. I’m sure it will be an adjustment for everyone, but I’ll do whatever I can to make it easy on all of you.”
“Good. See if you can get some more sleep. When the sun’s up and you’re ready, we’ll get you settled in at our place.” Lee kissed her cheek. “It’ll be all right, Jaycee. I promise. Get some rest.”
Nodding, Jaycee pressed a hand to the cheek he’d kissed, feeling the warmth. She stepped carefully over Garrett’s sleeping form and snuggled back under the
covers. The night was chilly, and her skin had cooled while she was out of bed. After she’d settled in, she turned her head to watch Lee as he returned to the sheet on the floor. Her eyes met his and held. They watched each other, as she drifted back to sleep, content that they would keep her safe.
The next morning, the sun rose like every other day, but the world felt different to Jaycee. It could have had something to do with the handsome men asleep on the floor at her bedside, or maybe it had more to do with the desire burning in her heart. Today she would find the Wallners. No more waiting, she finally could find her father’s friends, and begin to bring justice to the people who framed him, while getting him released from his wrongful sentence. Last night she had dreamed of setting her father free. Her dream had been empowering. It had made her feel like she could do anything if she only tried.
Rising from bed, Jaycee grabbed her journal from under the mattress, and hid it in her bag. She gathered her clean-up kit and a fresh set of clothes, another sweater and jeans combo. Garrett’s eyes met hers from the floor.
“Sneaking out, Jaycee?” he teased her, causing her to jump.
“Ha, ha, ha. I’m going to head to the bathrooms down the hall and get cleaned up,” she replied.
“If you wait, you can get a hot shower at our place. There are several bathrooms and we have an amazing water heater…it takes a lot to run out of hot water,” Garrett said.
“I can just pop down and…” Jaycee said.
“We have a tub and you can take a nice soak. No one will bother you.” He couldn’t have picked a better argument.
“Okay, you found my weakness. I’ll just pull on a hoodie, and keep the hood up,” Jaycee agreed.