I watched until she disappeared through the door, telling myself it was to make sure she left, but I knew the real reason.
She was taking a part of me with her. A part I would never get back, never wanted to get back.
I loved her.
But it just wasn't enough.
Chapter 12
Emily
She was broken.
After everything she had been through over the last year, losing Conall had broken her. The reasons for doing what she did suddenly seemed so pathetic and naïve. She had been a complete idiot. She'd overlooked the fact that her brother had never done anything for anyone but himself and trusted him when it was a matter of life and death.
She should have known. She should have opened her eyes.
But she had been content to keep her head down and believe that no matter what life throws at you, your family is always there to back you up. To help you. To sacrifice.
Hers never had.
Why the hell did she think that would ever change?
She knew the dread she had felt when she dialed his number that morning was a warning. She'd just been so relieved to remember her brother's cell number. The phone she had used before was shattered and the only option she had left was to use the one Conall had provided for her. She knew it was a risk, but she'd been stupid enough to take it. Conall was busy talking to his boss, so she made the quick call.
"What?" her brother answered angrily.
"Rayce, it's me. My phone is broken."
"Emily?"
She should have paid attention to the thump in her chest when he acted surprised to hear from her. Almost as if he wasn't expecting her to ever contact him again.
"They found me, Rayce. Some guy found me and tried to take me but he said he had nothing to do with Ripley."
"Shit! Where are you now?"
"It doesn't matter because we're leaving, I think. I'm not going to call you anymore. I think they're finding me-"
"Don't worry about that, Em," he said soothingly. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you. I need to come to you, okay? No one else is going to be able to protect you."
"No! It's not just me anymore, Rayce. I can't go through with this, okay? These people are wonderful and don't deserve this. I can't do it anymore. I won't. How did they find me anyway? I thought you-"
"Damn it, Emily!" His voice was cold and she knew if she could see him now, she would see that ice shooting at her from the hard eyes that used to match hers. "You want me to end up in prison or worse? After everything, you're just going to give up on me?"
"I'm sorry," she said shakily, but kept her resolve. "But I'm done. I'm telling them everything, Rayce. The evidence is damning Stanton anyway, I'm sure you'll be fine."
"Fuck you! I should have known you would back out of this."
"I'm sorry. Goodbye, Rayce. I love-"
He hung up before she could tell him and that was enough to convince her that what she was doing was right. She would suffer the consequences, but she wasn't going to lie to Conall anymore. She loved him too much. She knew her brother was in serious trouble, but protecting him was wrong. She had to believe that. If he had done something she couldn't imagine him doing, if he had killed someone… she had to believe that she was doing the right thing.
She was planning on waiting until they were in Denver to tell Conall, but he had found the broken phone and put the pieces together. He'd been so angry with her, but she held on to the hope that his love for her would help him understand.
She knew it was just her being stupid all over again.
"Ms. Dawson." A knock at the door and the muffled voice pulled her out of her thoughts. She had done nothing but cry since boarding that plane alone three days ago. Conall had already spilled the beans and the marshals that came to pick her up didn't hold back their anger. They didn't realize that she actually welcomed their disappointment. She could never punish herself enough for betraying the one man she would give up everything for, even her brother.
She had refused to ask about Conall when she met with Captain Miller that afternoon, but he informed her that Conall was safe and had reported back to him since they separated. She got the feeling that he knew what had transpired between them, but he didn't say anything about it. He could tell how upset she was. Didn't mean he'd gone easy on her.
She sat across from him for thirty minutes while he lectured her about the danger she had put so many people in and what the consequences were for what she had done. They were going to have to reinvestigate and find her brother to come in and straighten things out.
She'd barely listened, but she knew she would probably end up in jail.
She wished they would just hand her over to Ripley, but she had no such luck. They righteously continued to protect her, lock her up and keep her out of harm's way. She overheard them discussing a plan to use her betrayal against the Ripley brothers, but she didn't get any specific details on how they would, just that they weren't letting the cat out of the bag yet.
Another knock sounded before she was able to drag herself to the door. She opened it to find Deputy Givens on the other side. His face was hard and his eyes narrowed until he saw how awful she must have looked. The skin around her eyes was red and swollen from all the crying she had been doing and her hair was flat and greasy from refusing to get out of bed for the past three days.
He cleared his throat and looked away from her for a moment before his gaze, only slightly softer, met hers again. "Ms. Dawson, Captain Miller is on the phone. He says it's important."
"Okay," she muttered and followed him out into the living room.
The apartment they were staying in was tiny and rundown. She missed the bathtub Conall had teased her about getting so excited over and she missed the sound of him talking to his family every so often. A family that she would kill to have for herself.
There were now three of them altogether and she was grateful that they left her alone most of the time. Another woman, Deputy Shaw, who had been assigned to her 24/7, was polite and professional, but she reminded Emily of Ash with her dark hair and tiny figure. Then there was Deputy Givens, who was only around in the mornings. He would have been fun to talk to, if he actually talked to her. Not that she gave any of them a chance really.
He handed her the phone and before she could even say 'Hello', she knew that something was seriously wrong. The shouting in the background didn't stop her from hearing the angry tone from Captain Miller.
"Emily, where the hell is your brother?"
"I'm sorry?"
"He's disappeared. Went right off the grid."
She shouldn't have been surprised, but her foggy brain couldn't wrap her mind around a single reason why he would just disappear if what he told her had been the truth. It broke her heart all over again. Her brother… he wasn't the same kid she had raised since the day he came home from the hospital and she held him in her arms.. "I don't-"
"We can't find him and Brannock has apparently taken it upon himself to look for him. I can't reach him either."
Panic settled in her chest at the mention of Conall and the depression she'd been in lifted off of her to be replaced by overwhelming fear. Much worse than devastating sadness. "What? Do you know if he's okay?"
"No! He's not answering his phone and his family said he took off early this morning. His sister said she didn't know anything else, but that was a big fat lie."
Where would he go looking for her brother? Why would he go looking for her brother?
"What the hell happened between you two? Brannock is the only detective I've got who follows orders without asking questions, now he's blatantly disobeying every God damn…"
Emily stopped listening and let the panic take over. Conall was putting himself in danger by looking for her brother, but she knew he would be the one to find him. And then what? If it hadn't been for her, he would be safe and going on with his life like he always had. He wouldn't be putting his career in jeopardy.
S
he could only imagine what could happen if he stepped in Ripley's path. She had a feeling the guy was probably looking for her brother, too. She'd been informed of everything he was doing over the last several weeks and she knew he had done nothing but lie to her since the very beginning. He didn't give a shit about her. He was always selfish. Whatever he was doing was only benefitting himself.
"Captain Miller, I think maybe I can find out where he is. I'll have to call Aislinn, but I might be able to get it out of her if she knows something." And I'll be able to beg him to just leave it alone and let my brother suffer for his own choices.
"Do it! Call me with whatever you find out."
He hung up and she sat there silent for a moment. Everyone was hanging up on her lately and it was making her angry.
Good, anger was what she needed to get through whatever the hell was going to happen now.
***
Conall
I pulled up to a tiny old brick house with an even smaller yard in downtown Denver. The house belonged to the officer who was supposedly murdered by Stanton Ripley. His widow and two small children still lived here and it was time to get some answers about what happened that night.
Three days ago, I let Emily get on that plane without me, but I wasn't going to stop until I knew she was safe. Just because someone else was watching over her and she was no longer testifying didn't mean she was out of the woods and a part of me just couldn't give up on her. I was determined to get to the bottom of this and find out who was still going to come after her. I was determined to find that manipulative little shit stain brother of hers, too.
He had a play in more than just manipulating her into testifying to keep him out of trouble. He had a hand in Daniel's death and I was so close, I could almost taste it. I made my assumptions, but I wasn't going to run with anything until I learned more.
Ash had tried to talk me into going straight to Emily and making sure she was okay, but after a brief argument, she stopped pushing me about it. I told her and Luke what Emily confessed to and wasn't surprised when neither one of them could really blame her.
I was still angry that she had lied to me, but I understood why she did it. I just didn't agree with how she did it and how she could look me in the eyes and tell me she loved me after putting me and my family in danger.
At least, that's the argument I used with Ash.
"Get over yourself, Con! I would have done the exact same thing."
"Really?" I replied sarcastically. "You would have jeopardized a murder trial and investigation, lied to a hundred people because you were manipulated into it by someone who you knew you should never trust in the first place, risked time in prison, possibly put an innocent man in prison, and put a family in danger who, by the way, took you in and protected you?"
"Yes. If it meant protecting you? Hell yes!"
I hadn't been expecting that answer and I stood there staring at my little sister, the little sister who loved me unconditionally, just like Emily had loved her brother.
"I don't even know what to say to that," I grumbled, feeling the first sting of guilt that maybe I had made a mistake. It was wrong to feel guilty, but I couldn't help it.
"You don't have to say a damn thing, Con. You wouldn't be able to change it. Hell, I would have done even more than what Emily did. I wouldn't have ever confessed to it. In fact, I probably would have kept right on lying even if I had fallen in love."
"You don't know what you're saying."
She huffed and rolled her eyes. "I do! That's not the problem here, though. Family, loyalty. Isn't that what you put over your heart when Mom died?"
Luke was watching her rip into me and refused to look my way or defend me. He completely agreed with her. He'd risked his job and his life to protect my sister and he would do the same for me and Gus. I knew it without a doubt.
"Forget the honesty part, just think of what came first. That brother of hers is the only person that kept her going when she lost her parents and you may think she didn't miss them, but I know different. She didn't miss them for her, it was for him. She would do anything for that man because she is loyal to her family. But she was going to give it up for you with the hope that maybe, just maybe, he would be okay in the end. Now, I know that doesn't make it right, but I really don't think she felt like she had a choice, brother."
"There's always a choice," I pointed out.
"Yeah, well sometimes we all make the wrong ones. Doesn't mean we're terrible people, it just means we make mistakes. That girl wants to believe her family is salvageable, even if she knows it's not possible. "
For the first time ever, my little sister had officially put me in my place. No pretending she had won just to make her feel better, no trickery. She was right.
"You love her, Con. You're not complete without her and I can only imagine how incomplete she feels right now. Don't throw that away, please. You'll live the rest of your life miserable because you let the love of your life go over a mistake. She did exactly what she needed to do in order to protect her family. Even if it was stupid."
I didn't need to hear anything else. I knew what I had to do.
I stood and walked out of the kitchen where we had been arguing to go to my father's office.
"Where are you going?" Ash called out behind me. I could hear the smile in her voice and I grinned at her enthusiasm. She may be wise now, but she was still a dork.
"To fix this."
I'd spent the next few hours scheduling flights and going over the case files. Gus had called and we spent another hour discussing all the possible scenarios that could have played out that night. Including the very real possibility that Stanton Ripley was an innocent man. Luke had been included in that discussion and made an interesting point.
"Who gains the most by having Stanton in prison and out of the way?"
None of us could come up with a single obvious suspect, but I knew who it could be. I just didn't know how to tie Dawson and Ripley together. I didn't want to think that he would go to the lengths he did to get it done.
I arrived in Denver late this morning and my first stop was here at Officer Greg Daniel's home to find out why anyone would want him dead, if there was any reason other than he was at the wrong place at the wrong time.
I walked up the small porch littered with toys and knocked on the crooked screen door. There was screaming on the other side, but it sounded like two little kids shouting back and forth.
"Quiet, you two, or both of you are sitting in your room for the rest of the day," a voice said sharply.
A moment later the door opened and a tall, blonde haired, blue eyed woman stood in the doorway. "Can I help you?"
I cleared my throat and showed her my badge, "Yes, I'm an officer in the same department your husband was working. I just wanted to pay my respects and also ask a few questions."
Her eyes darted around the yard and up and down the street. "You alone?"
"Yes ma'am."
"What questions?"
She looked nervous and the hair on the back of my neck stood on end. No way I was leaving here without some answers. Anything to push me in the right direction.
"Do you mind if I come in?"
She nodded and pushed the screen door open, "Sure. Let me get my kids situated and we'll talk."
I followed her inside and watched as she herded her two children into a bedroom and turned on a television with the instruction to stay in there until she came to get them. The kids couldn't be any older than 6 or 7. They were twins and looked a lot like their mother.
She walked back into the living room and gestured for me to sit.
"My name is Conall Brannock," I said and shook her hand before sitting back on the couch.
"Lucy Daniels. Don't know much else that I can tell the police. He was a cop, the danger came with the job."
"You don't sound like you are too distraught about-"
"That's because I'm not," she laughed. "Greg was a jerk and a crook. We had been separated for
a few months before he was killed and I'm just mad that I didn't get a chance to watch him sign the divorce papers."
This was news to me. "That isn't something I was told. We all thought you two were still together."
"Yeah, that's what I told them so I could get paid. As you can tell, we aren't set up very well, I needed the money and I didn't think telling anyone I was done with him would help me get it."
I was stunned, but then it wasn't any of my business. I wasn't here officially and I wasn't going to waste my time on anything else that would stop me from protecting Emily.
"I know you aren't here on official police business, otherwise, you're partner would be with you. I have a feeling you're here for another reason." She narrowed her eyes to gauge my reaction.
"And what would that be?"
"To find out if my husband was a dirty cop. Guess what? He was. He ran whatever he could get his hands on and played bodyguard for whoever gave him his checks, which by the way, I never saw."
This answered a lot of questions about why he was associating with Stanton Ripley and how he ended up dead. Dirty cops don't realize that karma's a bitch.
"Do you know who he was working for?"
"Yeah, I do. It's the reason I was divorcing him and getting his sorry ass away from my children." She took a breath and looked me square in the eyes. "Lucien Ripley."
***
Jack's Pub was completely empty except for one old timer sitting at the bar and a tiny blonde bartender who reminded me of Emily. The need to see her was crushing and going to her was the next place on my list.
"Can I help you, officer?" she asked when I flashed my badge. There was really no point in doing so, but I didn't want anyone to think I was trying to wiggle my way in undercover. I didn't have time for that and they wouldn't let me passed the jukebox if I tried.
"I need to find Lucien Ripley."
Her eyes widened, brown eyes that looked nothing like the bright green I loved so much. "I, um, I don't know what to tell you. I'm not really given that information anyway."
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