by Lexie Ray
And it wasn’t like she had gotten a chance to expand on that after he had left. The first couple of months after he had left had been the worst. That was when all the rumors were trickling back. Stories about all the other women that he was meeting and bedding. On the darkest nights, when the other side of the bed seemed cold and large, she had resented him. Resented him for leaving, resenting him getting to experience and explore all the things she wouldn’t get. On those nights, she had even resented being a mother and stuck with all the responsibilities and pressures, not even given a day off since Ben was completely out of the question. A part of her would always hate him for making him feel that way. There was a larger part that would never forgive herself.
But maybe that was the whole issue. She had never had a chance to explore a few sides of herself. And then there Daren was, a practically gift-wrapped mix of strength and pliability. If she was honest with herself, she, herself, had been pretty much repressed sexually since she and Ben had become an item. So, having Daren – sweet but gruff Daren with arms that could give her naughty thoughts – telling her that he would do whatever she wanted, had just hit a switch.
And now that the switch had been thrown, it was a lot harder to turn it off again. Alone in the safety of her trailer, Rebecca was having a very hard time keeping her mind from straying. How many ways could she make him blush? What would his moans sound like? She had never really cared that much for vocalization in the bedroom, but with a rough voice like that, not to mention Daren’s normally reserved manner…
The idea of being the reason for him completely losing it and moaning loud enough to shake a room burst into her mind as the sexiest notion she had ever had, and it wasn’t going to leave anytime soon.
Her heartbeat sped up at the thought, and a tight ball of need blossomed in the pit of her stomach. She shifted her weight and tried to get the idea out of her head. But each time she shifted the thought, she was hit with a voice whispering in the back of her head. He will do anything you want.
Desperate for a distraction, Rebecca hurried to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of iced tea. She drank most of it and didn’t taste a drop. It was just to have something to do, a habit to fall back on.
“You can’t do this,” she told herself. “It’s inappropriate on numerous levels. Not to mention, he might not be into it.”
Her heart was beating too fast and she couldn’t seem to calm it as her temperature continued to climb. The sensation was thrilling and a little intimidating at the same time. All things considered, it hadn’t been the greatest kiss she had ever had. It wasn’t earthshaking or toe curling. But it had still been enough to get her more turned on than she had ever been in her life.
She heard a knock on the door and opened it without thought, her mind still too occupied with what was happening within her head. It shouldn’t have been a surprise to find Daren sheepishly standing at the bottom of the very small flight of stairs. He glanced up at her but couldn’t hold her gaze. Instead, he shifted his eyes around like he was paranoid someone was going to come and overhear them.
“You can come in,” she told him and backed away.
It felt a little like she was luring him in, bit by bit, and she worried that this might not be a line of thought she should go down. The stairs squeaked slightly as Daren walked into the trailer. He glanced back at the door and looked at her. She waited, but he didn’t actually ask the question. Didn’t try to close it until she had given him permission. All it took was a nod and he hurried to close the door without comment.
She couldn’t help her brain from making the comparison between him and Ben. After all, Ben was the only experience she had. It had taken long discussions and arguments to get Ben just to take the garbage out. It was more than a little bit of a power trip to have a military-grade badass so willing to follow her demands.
“I just…” Daren stammered. “I just wanted to let you know that this kind of happens a lot.”
She raised her eyebrows. “What?”
“Well, normally with Jamie. Or Jai. They are just approachable or something,” he rushed to continue. “But I get it. You’re stressed. You’re scared. Your adrenaline would have been pumping after the trick ride.” It seemed to grow increasingly difficult for him to meet her eyes, and he fixed his gaze onto the table. “It all got caught up, and I happened to be the guy there at the time. I just wanted you to know that I get it.”
“Right,” Rebecca said.
Daren lowered his face and hunched his shoulders. “And I want you to know that I ain’t going to tell anyone. I wouldn’t do that to you.”
Rebecca drew closer, her arms crossed over her chest. “What is that supposed to mean?” The words came out sharper then she meant them to. She couldn’t help but get defensive. There were just too many ways that it could be a jab.
“I just mean,” he struggled to get the words out, “I know you wouldn’t want anyone thinking that you did that with me.”
“That I kissed you.”
“Yeah,” he mumbled.
Rebecca took a step closer, eliminating the last of the distance between them.
“And how do you feel about it?”
His eyes skipped up to hers. A spark of hope flickered through them, making his eyes a brilliant blue. He quickly looked away again.
“That don’t matter.”
“It matters to me,” she said. “Did you like it?”
He once again fell into a fit of stammering that made her think that he might have had a stutter when he was little. She felt need and desire rise up again, provoked by his bashful fumbling.
“You know, even if the plan is to pretend it never happened, you and I will both know.”
He swallowed, his cheeks flushing.
“I’m actually a good kisser,” she said as she took him in. “A lot better than that. It seems to me that, if we’re just going to ignore it, you should at least be ignoring the right thing.”
A slight shiver coursed down his spine. It brought with it a soft sigh that sent fire burning under her skin.
“I think we should kiss again. Just to make sure we got it right.”
He took a step back and smacked against the wall. But his chest heaved, his eyes darkening with want even as he ducked his face.
“Yeah. Ain’t that funny,” he mumbled.
“I ain’t joking,” she said.
Slowly, his eyes drifted up to her. He didn’t flinch away as she edged in a little closer.
“Just one more kiss?” she said.
She could hear his ragged breaths as he nodded. Even as he agreed, he didn’t seem like he thought that she would actually follow through. It was a bit hard not to laugh at how large his eyes got when she leaned in. Rebecca placed a hand gently against the side of his neck and rubbed his thumb against the stubble. His heartbeat fluttered under her fingertips, and his eyes slid shut.
He held absolutely still as she edged closer and tilted her face up. Gently, she ran the tip of her tongue against his lower lip. It was only a slight touch, but he opened to her with a soft sigh. She did it again. Again. Until his soft breaths became deep pants. Only then did she take his bottom lip into her mouth and suck on it. He whimpered, opening more readily to her greedy mouth.
Daren moaned softly, trying to smother the sounds, willingly giving himself up to whatever she wanted. But when she sucked on his tongue, his calm composure shattered and he became just as desperate as her. She pulled back, intent on teasing him just a little, to see if she could make him break into fevered need again. It was then that she noticed he had his hands in the air on either side of him. She giggled and his eyes snapped open.
“Did I do something wrong?”
“No, sugar. You’re doing everything right.”
Daren blushed a little under the praise.
“But what are you doing with your hands?”
“I just didn’t know if I’m allowed to touch,” he said
A strum of power sizzled through her an
d pooled in her stomach.
“Do you want to touch me?”
Before he could say anything, Rebecca took one of his hands and lightly kissed his fingertips, taking one in to nip at the pad. Daren shivered and let out a moan. The sound stoked the fire within her and made it impossible to keep from pressing her thigh between his legs. She pushed until she could feel the hard shaft of his erection through the layers of clothing. The back of his head hit the wall with a solid thump and a moan that could rival her dirtiest fantasies.
“You can touch me. If you want.”
Unable to catch his breath, Daren placed his hands on her hips, squeezing just a little. Rebecca giggled slightly and pushed her thigh against him again. Once again, he reacted like she had just sent his every nerve ending alight. She grinned as she licked a long strip along his neck, feeling one of his delicious moans rattling against her tongue.
“Is that the only place you want to touch me?” she asked.
He leaned more heavily against the wall and struggled to meet her gaze. The sheer want within them almost had her surging forward to claim his lips again. She had never ruined someone so quickly, but Daren was completely wrecked. It made her feel wild, unhinged, and completely irresistible. Basking in the glow of it, she smiled at him, a flash of teeth that she knew had to look predatory. His eyes darkened with a shattered breath, and his lips twisted up in an almost drunken smile.
It became impossible to keep her lips off him. Daren leaned back against the wall and let her ravage him. Lust spiralled through her like a whirlwind of fire. She buried her hands in his long hair and tightened her grip until he moaned into her mouth. High on sensation, Rebecca pulled back to hold his eyes once again. He didn’t try to shift his gaze. Didn’t try to hide. He watched her with rapt attention, ready and willing to do anything she wanted.
Presented with such an opportunity, one thought settled into the forefront of her mind, and she acted on it before the rest of her mind could catch up. She licked a long line from the base of his neck to his chin, feeling him rattle again.
“You’re so responsive,” she breathed.
It took her a moment to realize that his slight grumble was actually an apology. Giggling slightly, she leaned in and curled her tongue around his ear.
“Oh, darling. What is it that I’m doing,” she pressed her thigh harder against his crotch to emphasize her point, “that makes you think that I’m not really into you moaning for me?”
Daren seemed to lose all ability to speak as she rocked into him again. His eyelids fluttered closed, he licked his lips, and his fingers tensed against her hips. Still, he didn’t grind against her. His hips stuttered with his barely contained need.
She kissed his rapid pulse and mumbled against his skin, “I want to play a game with you.”
It took two thick swallows for him to find his voice. “Okay.”
“Here’s the rule. One of us gets to cum,” she ran her hand through his deceptively soft hair, “but only one. You get to decide: you or me?”
“You,” he said instantly.
She laughed against his neck and rocked against him again. He was like a line of iron pressed against her side. It must be hurting by now. His answer hadn’t surprised her. Ben had come up with the same answer when she had made the offer to him. Of course, ‘this is all about you, babe’ didn’t last much longer than her orgasm. Then it was all guilt trips and pleading. But Ben hadn’t sounded like Daren. The idea of him begging for her made heat pool between her legs.
“That was a fast decision,” she said. “Sure you don’t want to think it through?”
“You,” he breathed again. It seemed to cost him a lot to raise his head. “Can I…do it?”
Using her fingertips, Rebecca brushed his bangs off his forehead, exposing his intense gaze.
“Do you want to help me get off?”
Each heaved breath pushed the hard muscle of his chest against her breasts, sending sparks sizzling along her nerve endings. He nodded.
“You can do that. But kiss me first.”
Daren’s eyes drifted to her mouth. He moved slowly, as if waiting for her to change her mind. The moist skin of his lips brushed against hers, a gentle slide. He timidly reached out with his tongue before growing bolder and pushing forward. The contact broke his restraint, and he ground his hips against her once before he stilled.
“Sorry,” he mumbled.
“Darling.” She kept one hand in his hair, holding on tight enough to keep him close, as the other worked the buttons of her jeans. The back of her knuckles grazed his erection. He whimpered at every contact. “You got so hard so fast, I bet you’re dizzy.”
He only nodded as he looked down between them. The sound of her zipper sliding echoed over their panted breaths. Somewhere along the line, he had dropped one hand from her hip. She grabbed it now and pressed his palm against her lower stomach, his fingertips brushing against the waistband of her panties. His hand was searing hot against her skin, but it didn’t move.
“Go ahead, darling,” she said as she began to lave his neck with sucking bites. “Have some fun.”
Each muscle of her stomach twitched in anticipation as he slipped his calloused hand under the layer of her jeans. She almost screamed in frustration when she realized that the thin, soaked layer of her panties still separated them.
Timid at first, and then with increasing pressure, Daren massaged her mound. Each stroke bordered on relief, but never enough to push her all the way over the edge. Rebecca rocked into the touch and bit down on his neck.
“Don’t make me wait,” she said.
The slide of his fingertips along the line of her panties made her shudder. He still didn’t push the fabric aside.
“Ya sure?”
With a spark of need, she pushed him harder against the wall. “I’m sure.”
He still looked like he didn’t quite believe it, but his fingers pushed aside the fabric, and his skin slid gloriously against Rebecca’s wet folds. The first contact set her fire alight and broke whatever remaining restraint she might have held. She captured his mouth again, her movements more tonguing and wanting as she began to rock herself against him.
The space was limited and the material constricting. It reduced his movements, but she was beyond needing finesse and technique. Her entire being was screaming for release loud enough to drown out thought, responsibility, or reason. All that existed was his tongue playing with her own, his cheek grazing around her hard nipples, and the completely full filling as he slid two fingers deep inside her.
Biting his shoulder to silence her cry, she rutted against him, too far gone into bliss to do anything else. His thumb flicked mercilessly against her clit, pressing hard as she rolled her hips forward and chasing her as she pulled back. In the tight confines, he could barely move his wrist, but the hand on her helped to steady her as she rode him.
“Is this okay?” he breathed against her lips.
She groaned. There was no plead for attention in his words. Not hint for validation. Just the pure, unrelenting desire to do whatever she needed to get her there. She didn’t think her fingers could tighten any more on his hair, but her overwhelming need to keep him there, keep him close, made it happen. A deep moan pulled from him at her touch, his fingers crooking inside her until she gasped out.
“Just like that.” She licked into his mouth, her frantic need releasing a thin trail of saliva to drip down his chin.
The sudden pulse of lust that the sensation provoked almost made her knees buckle. He obediently curled and released his fingers, massaging inside of her as well as out as she snapped her hips against his hand.
“Perfect.” The word was released just before she had to bite down on her lip to keep in a scream.
She heard his sharp intake of air and opened her eyes to see a blush racing across his cheeks. The slight bit of praise made him bolder, surer of his actions as he swirled his fingertips around her G-spot. She dug the nails of her free hand into his sh
oulder, holding tight enough to feel every twitch and pull of muscle as he pleased her.
“Oh, that’s it, Daren. Just like that.”
He tried his best to smother his answer, distorting it into a mewl as he pressed his face into the crook of her neck. The plastic walls rattled under their movements as she bucked faster, losing her rhythm in her desperate, mindless need.
“So close. You’re so good at this.” His fingers sped up and she could feel his cock twitching against her thigh. “I’m gonna cum, Daren. Keep touching me. You know how I like it, don’t you? So good.”
She pulled back just enough to see the thick outline of his cock, pressed so hard against the zipper that it might permanently stretch the fabric. Pre-cum seeped into the denim, creating a dark, visible pool. He left it completely abandoned as he swirled his thumb against her.
“Almost…” she couldn’t get the words out as her insides clenched and twisted, pulling together to create a tight spring inside of her.
She moaned his name, watching with fascination as his cock responded each time.
“That’s it. Just like that. Perfect.”
With a sharp jerk and twist, the spring inside Rebecca burst out in a hailstorm of fireworks. She wrenched his mouth to hers, hiding her scream but pushing it into his mouth. Her body rocked and stilled as shockwaves crumbled her from the inside out. Daren kept his fingers moving, searching and finding every last way to keep the series of sparks bursting. She started moving her tongue in time to his sliding fingers. It was barely enough to be called a kiss as she struggled to catch her breath. It was more a play of tongues. Something that felt lewd and dirty and absolutely incredible.
He slowed his fingers to keep in time with her breaths, the sensation always hovering on too much, but never quite. Her knuckles ached as she loosened her grip and sanity slipped back into her thoughts.
Slowly, taking the moment to enjoy every curve and shape of muscle, she trailed her hand down Daren’s chest. She was still lapping at his mouth, too blissed out to feel self-conscious. Her fingers reached his belt as she ached to touch the spot she had noticed earlier. To caress and pull what had caused it.