“Kelly, if you don't step away…”
Still, at that moment there was nothing she wanted more but to go inside with him. She knew where it would lead, and she knew it would change everything between them even more. That was the biggest fear she had. “I don't think I want to. To step away, I mean.”
“You need to be absolutely sure.” His words were hushed, and she wondered at that. They were alone. Standing in the driveway of yet another house he’d collected—a big, looming, monstrous old house, complete with widow’s walk on the top. She shivered
It wasn't just the house that had ghosts, they all did. It'd taken her a long while to accept that. And ghosts didn't just come at you when you were young; they came whenever something touched you, whenever something mattered to you enough to leave its indelible mark upon your soul. They had all been through it, and she knew without a doubt that Josh was going through it right now.
Even if nothing came from what they were about to do, she would know in her heart that she was there for him when he needed her most. What else could she do? He'd seen her during the darkest parts of her life, had held her when she was hurting.
When she'd been shot in the alley outside of Smokey’s she thought for a moment she was going to die. And then he had been there. His hands steady and sure, his eyes on hers. He'd been the one to keep her calm, to hold her when her father had driven them to the hospital.
He'd been there for her ever since. Whenever she needed him in the months since that night. Her hand went to her stomach where the scars rested. He would see them, plus the ones on her back from the lab explosion. No man had seen them; she had not slept with a man since coming to St. Louis. But she didn't feel self-conscious in that moment. Josh knew what haunted her. She'd come to him imperfect, scars and all.
It would be that way between them, or it wouldn't be at all.
Did he know that? She thought he did. There was a vulnerable the about him now—one she'd never seen before. Josh wore his confidence like he wore trousers. But tonight he didn’t. He seemed softer, sadder. He needed her. That meant something to her. To put it more on equal footing than they'd ever been. He had always been the one to save her, to rescue her, to swoop in when she needed someone there big, strong, and steady. Always Josh.
If her father couldn't be there, Josh had. Was that part of the allure? God help her, was she that selfish? Was she just turning to him because she felt she needed to repay him from something? Kelly didn't want to think that way. And it wasn't that way, right? If she was with Josh, it would be because they both wanted it, right? Because for whatever reason they needed each other at that moment. She had to tell herself that. But she couldn't just let him lead her into the house. That put the control in his hands, and this is something she had to control for herself.
This had to be her decision, and no one else's. “I am sure Josh. This is what I want. I don't know what's going to happen between us in the morning, but I know this is what I want tonight.”
***
Josh forced himself to not just grab her and yank her to him. He didn't know why he suddenly had all these aggressive feelings toward Kelly. But he did.
Maybe something had happened to him after the Tyler case; maybe something dark and primal had awakened in him. Something that was still screaming inside him to just grab the nearest woman and reassure himself that he was still alive.
Maybe he was using her? Using her to forget, to feel something, anything for once.
Could he really do that to her? Was he really willing to possibly destroy one of the best connections he had ever had for something as trivial as sex?
But it didn't feel so trivial, did it?
He tried to hold her hand, to pull her behind him as he climbed the steps. But that wasn't Kelly's way. No, he shouldn't have expected that. With something this important, she would want to be right there by his side.
He didn't think he loved her. At least not like Hell loved Georgia or Dan loved Ally. But there was love between them—how could there not be? Friends, lovers? Where was the real line? Should there be one? Had he ever been so torn about a woman before? What did that say about him, about his sanity?
“This won’t change our friendship. Promise me that.” She said as he stepped closer to the front door.
He didn’t answer. Josh grabbed her and pushed her down the steps and toward his truck. “Get in the truck. Call the police and then your father to come get you.”
“What?” She looked around his shoulder, and he cursed. “Oh my God.”
“Get in the truck and lock the doors. Better yet, go home. Get your dad.”
“No, I’m not leaving you here alone.”
His service weapon was secured in the glove box of his truck. He had her father’s old .380 at his ankle. Josh pulled it and kept his body between his and hers. He tried one last time. “Get in the truck. My service weapon is in there. Get in and lock the door. Call your father and the police. J.T. may still be at your Dad’s.”
***
She'd seen what he had. The dark green paint against the old lighter green background had shown macabre in the low light of dusk.
“Josh?” She wasn’t running and hiding. But she wasn’t stupid, either. He had the weapon. She’d stay behind him. “I’m behind you. All the way.”
“Stubborn woman. Stay back.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her along behind him. “Or better yet, go get in the truck. Call your father. He’s going to kill me if I let you get anywhere near who did this.”
“My dad? Shouldn't we call the locals?”
“Standard policy—since the break-in at Ally's the night you were shot—any crime committed on the property of a PAVAD agent is immediately reported to PAVAD superior.” He still blocked her body from the inside of the building. Was the vandal still there? “I wish you’d go to the truck.”
“Hmm, let’s see? Wait in the exposed vehicle, in the driveway of the Addams Family house alone? While you go inside to fight the bad guy with only that teeny tiny little gun? I don't think so.”
“Then you stay right here behind me. If I say run, you run just like in Tennessee. Call 911.”
She knew he was irritated, but Kelly didn't care. Not with the idea of someone out there; someone watching, possibly someone with a gun a hell of a lot bigger than the one that Josh carried. That was just too much for her. Brought back one too many bad memories. She wasn’t letting him go in there alone.
“I'm calling right now.”
***
Dan brought what had to be half the local police force with him, as well as J.T. Nothing less than Josh had expected. One thing that was absolutely certain with Dan Reynolds was that what someone he cared about needed him, he responded probably a bit too much. Josh understood the way the other man felt. “How bad is it?”
“Kelly took a look around once we knew they were gone,” Josh said. “We both think it looks like random vandals except for one thing…” Josh turned to what he meant. Although it was kind of hard to miss, wasn’t it? He doubted Dan, experienced agent that he was, hadn’t already seen the largest piece of damage. He's mine, bitch was rather specific.
Josh had to wonder. Was it aimed at Kelly?
Without thinking about it, he grabbed her hand. He had no doubt that everyone around them already knew of the relationship. And he wasn't ashamed to be with her. And if it bothered her—well, she’d just have to get over that, and fast. Or she’d just have to tell him to leave her alone completely. And he’d do it. If that was what she wanted. “My gut is saying random vandals, but… If someone is watching the house that could've seen something that pissed them off.” It was unlikely that he was being stalked. Only one in about twenty men were stalked in their lifetime. He was well aware of the statistics. Kelly had been stalked. In fact, many of the PAVAD agents had been, too many for to be statistically possible.
Not improbable, of course, but not likely. Still, why would someone write that exact phrase on his wall in the paint that he
had been planning to use in the entryway? If it was targeted, everything hinged on that phrase. Nothing too personal had been destroyed; nothing shouted overt sexual rage. But he wasn't ruling that out, either. There could've been jealousy. Hell, it could've even been meant for the last tenants —they hadn't exactly been overly stellar people.
“You have any ideas it would do this?” The local agent asked. “You have the property very long?”
“Not long. I picked it up in a foreclosure auction about two months ago. I just started on the remodels within the last month. Started staying here about a week ago. I still haven't found tenants for the other house yet.”
“How many properties do you have?” the officer asked. “I've seen this kind of damage before involving tenants and landlord disputes.”
“This is my fifth property. It's a side business; I have three currently rented. Good tenants, I screen them very well. Never had any disputes, never had any evictions. I doubt it was one of my tenants. As for this place, it sat vacant for three years. Husband died, wife lost the house in foreclosure. Owners before that were elderly and let it go there at the end.”
“Ex-girlfriends?” The officer looked at Kelly. Josh knew what he saw, how could he not? Beautiful, sexy woman with a deceptively wild appearance. It lent to assumptions. Wrong ones, but he knew how people judged her at first glance. “Ex-boyfriends of Miss Reynolds perhaps?”
“It's Dr. Reynolds,” Dan said. Josh knew the older man was extremely proud of his daughter's accomplishments. And Dan wouldn’t have Kelly underestimated by anyone. “My daughter works in the forensics department of the FBI: PAVAD directorate, she's highly skilled in the field. One of the best.”
“It’s okay, Dad. And no, Officer Lloyd, no ex-boyfriend. I’ve not dated anyone since moving to St. Louis eighteen months ago.” She looked at Josh. He looked at her. After a moment, he turned back to the officer.
“No, ex-girlfriends either. Been too busy.” Until now. He would make time for Kelly, of that he was absolutely certain.
“Could this possibly be case related?” The officer asked. “Something FBI related?”
Josh shook his head. “No, I doubt it. I’m on sabbatical for almost another month. The only thing I planned to do was paint, replace floorboards—make this place habitable as fast as I possibly could. I may be staying here for a while, or maybe not.”
“I hate to say it, but at this point it does look like random vandals. We will check the neighborhood. It is highly unlikely will find out who did it.” The officer shook Josh's hand and nodded at Kelly. He looked at Dan. “Sir…I wish I could be more help.”
Josh waited until most of the police had pulled away. He looked at Kelly's father just as Ally arrived. “Bit of overkill, wasn't it? A single control car probably would've done it.”
“A call goes out of the house where my daughter is and I’ll do everything in my power to keep her safe.” Dan held up a hand when Kelly started to protest. “I know, I know, the two of you can handle yourselves just fine. I’m well aware of that—and at your ages you’d better be able to, right? That doesn't mean a father doesn't worry—especially after everything that's happened to you lately. The two of you are just going to have to deal with that in the meantime. Today was vandals. But maybe it wasn’t. It could be PAVAD related. We can’t rule that out, ever. If there is something you need to tell me, Josh, you need to tell me now–”
“Dad–”
“Kelly Danielle, we've all done this job long enough to know that the risks increase when someone thinks they can do it all by themselves. Is it possible you've angered someone with something you've done, son?”
Josh thought about it. And he understood Dan’s worry.
Kelly could've walked in on the intruder. There was no guarantee he would have been able to protect her, even with the weapon he was carrying. There was nothing in this world he wanted more than to keep her safe. Did her father know that? “No. I haven't spoken to any witnesses, or done anything more than study the files in the forensic report, nothing. Certainly nothing to warrant this.” He was the first in the living room. “Dammit, I was going to use that paint for the entryway—not the living room floor.”
“We can probably get prints off of this,” Kelly said from near the spilled paint can. Ally stood next to her, both women wore gloves and were slipping into work mode. He didn’t know why the sight made him want to smile, but it did.
Dan had a smile on his own face when he looked at them. “Bag some samples, sweetheart. You two can take them to the lab in the morning. Analyze to your scientific hearts’ content. I’ll clear the time with Ed and Marianna. In the meantime, Josh why don't you stay at our place? I have Emma's old room available. It's extremely pink, and the bed might be too short, but at least it won't be a paint covered futon.”
It wasn't a bad idea; one glance at his watch told him that it was close to one already. And Dan was right, his bed was covered in sticky green paint.
He'd either be buying a new futon or a king-size bed to put upstairs in the morning. Whoever had trashed the place had left the bedroom mostly alone. So he had two choices—camp on the hard floor with paint strewn everywhere, or a nice bed two floors above where Kelly was sleeping. Kelly. Decision made. He was like a damned magnet, wasn’t he? “Thanks, Dan. I think I'll take you up on that.”
Chapter 36
Kelly wasn't sure how she felt about that. The events of just before they walked up to the house was still weighing very heavily on her mind. She didn't know if the interruption had been a good thing or not. Maybe it was Fate’s way of telling them they were about to make a big mistake. She didn't know; she did know that something about this mess around them shouted more rage than random.
She wasn't a profiler or a victimologist—Josh's official term. Rumor had it he would be up for the profilers’ exam as soon as they offered it again—which wasn't often. But something about the room didn’t say random vandal to her. She’d seen plenty of random vandalism scenes. This wasn’t quite the same. “This is going to take hours and some money to get this cleaned up.”
“Yeah, it will. I had been hoping to get most of the work done over the next few days. Give myself some time to think. Somehow I don't think that is going to happen now. It's going to take all my energy just get the paint dealt with.”
“For what it's worth, it doesn't look like the mess is as bad upstairs as it is down.” And he had done such a good job with the upstairs. The house had at least four or five bedrooms, most located on the upper floors. There were two upper, the first floor, an attic and a basement. She wasn’t too eager to go back down there. It was a creepy old Colonial, complete with widow’s walk on top. The kind she had always dreamed of living in, to be honest. One that wasn’t so haunted looking, though.
She’d gotten sick of the nomad life when her mother had been dragging them all over different cities in Canada. Her mother favored apartment complexes with clubhouses and swimming pools over old-fashioned family homes like this. Her father's was a mix of soaring cathedral windows, log cabin, and natural stone. It was large enough for a family of nine to live comfortably, and there were two small apartments in the basement. She occupied one, and the other was empty. Furnished. Waiting for someone to step into it. Before she even thought it through she asked the question? “Why don't you stay in the other apartment? Just until this place is a bit more occupant ready.”
They had space. Lots of it. And there was no way he could sleep on the futon again. And there was no sense in him sleeping on the floor. “Dad? Do you think that would work?”
“Of course. I was just about to suggest that myself, you beat me to buy a few minutes Kelly, Danielle.”
Kelly didn’t have to look at Ally to know what her friend thought of the idea.
What had she been thinking?
***
Josh didn't exactly feel railroaded, but when two pairs of identical green eyes looked in his direction, he knew the decision had been made. And that meant
he would be sleeping less than thirty feet from her. That beat being two floors up. Was that why she'd suggested it?
Did her father suspect the thoughts that were running through his head? One look at Dan, and he knew the older man had figured him out exactly. Josh wouldn't feel guilty for it, even though there was quite a bit of awkwardness when he thought about it. Dan didn't say anything; Josh wondered about that for a moment. Did Dan approve, was he thinking there was something there on a bit more permanent scale?
The idea definitely didn’t bother Josh at all.
What was that telling him? There was something there between the two of them something more than what had almost happened tonight. He knew it. She knew it. They just had to deal with it.
Ironically, in situations where he was unsure of himself the first friend he turned to was usually Kelly's father. But wouldn't that be a bit awkward now? Hey Dan, can you help me out here, please? I've got a raging case of lust for your daughter. Can you give me some advice here?
Not exactly something Dan would appreciate, was it? Josh would just have to figure it out for himself. “Let me grab my bag. I got most of my actual belongings in storage. I haven’t been home long enough to really need anything. I just made do when I moved in here. The rest I was just waiting to move when the house was finished.”
***
She couldn't fathom it — since she'd been an adult, she'd needed a place to call her own. Even when living with Ally she'd been able to hold her head up and say she paid her own way. She’d been reluctant to move in with her father, but after Paige had married and moved out of the basement it had seemed silly to pay so much rent someplace else when she was spending all of her spare time at her father’s anyway. Her father agreed to her paying him one hundred dollars each month—at her insistence though she suspected he was banking that money somewhere—as rent. A pittance, but he wouldn’t hear of her paying any more. And that's just because she insisted; her father would let her live there rent free—he'd probably pay her just to live there, the way he was.
Ghosting (PAVAD: FBI Romantic Suspense Book 10) Page 11