Once in the room and after having received a warm, tight hug from Elizabeth, Georgiana seated herself in the chair her brother had just vacated.
“Oh my, what a long ride that was!” Georgiana was so soft-spoken, even her exclamation came out as soft and dainty. “I’m simply exhausted.”
“You’ll need to rest before we go to the ball tonight. There will be much frivolity and dancing. You don’t want to miss the fun, do you, my sister?” Darcy sat himself down on the couch opposite the chair Georgiana had taken. Elizabeth exited the dressing table and came to sit next to her husband.
“I certainly don’t want to miss anything, Darcy. However will I find the energy to dance? I’ve already dressed for the ball.”
Elizabeth laughed. “It’s not for several hours, Georgiana. You may find yourself tired of the dress before you even get to the party!”
Georgiana laughed, a light tinkling sound that brought a smile to Elizabeth and Darcy’s faces instinctively. “I shall most certainly tire of it ahead of time, my dear Lizzy, but I promise you, I will persevere. I won’t be undone by the heaviness of the fabric of this dress, its many layers, or my own eyes! I shall make it through, and I may even deign to dance every now and then.”
“As long as you’re doing your best, it’s all that can be asked for,” Darcy said softly, gazing with love at his little sister. “You’ll be staying with us for a fortnight, is that correct?”
“Yes, I wish to stay through Christmas and the New Year.”
“Delightful,” Darcy replied with approval. “I was hoping that you hadn’t changed your mind.”
“Oh no!” Georgiana shook her head. “I haven’t spent any significant time with you since you married this wonderful woman, my brother.” She turned her pretty eyes to Elizabeth. “How have you been faring, my dear? It’s a wonder you’ve put up with my brother for so long. It’s been several months, hasn’t it? I hope he hasn’t been tormenting you too severely.”
Elizabeth laughed. “Not at all, my dear. In fact, he’s succeeded in changing my opinion of him in many ways.”
“That’s good to hear. I always wondered how he would fare with the ladies when his behavior was so focused on himself and his fortune for a time.”
“There were many other things that influenced the decisions I’ve made in the past, Georgiana.” Elizabeth was surprised to hear a tone of warning in his voice. She looked from Darcy to Georgiana and back again. Her sister-in-law blushed, and dropped her eyes.
“I do know, Fitzie. I’m grateful for all you’ve done for me.”
Darcy was quick to change the subject, standing up and holding out his hand to his sister. “We won’t speak of the past tonight. We’ll dance and sing and have a good time, shall we?”
“Yes, yes, that sounds delightful.” Georgiana’s smile was back and she took her brother’s hand. “If you will allow me some time to prepare myself, we will be off.”
Elizabeth laughed, standing with the help of her husband’s hand. “As I said, my dear, the ball isn’t set to start for several hours. Let’s go and sit in the garden while we wait and we’ll have a nice chat. I’ve prepared a special feast of sweets for you, and tea will be ready in seconds.”
Chapter 14
Through her open door Elizabeth could hear the low, murmuring voices of her husband and his sister in the drawing room. She wondered what they were talking about. At times, she could hear Darcy’s voice turn a bit hard while his sister’s would rise in pitch, sounding a bit hurt.
She felt pity for Georgiana. She’d heard Darcy’s forceful voice herself and it was unnerving to say the least. When he wanted to, his words could cut to the bone. The dance had been successful. She hadn’t seen Wickham, which was a disappointment, but it settled her to think she would converse with him soon enough. If she hadn’t been forced to marry Darcy, she could see herself marrying Wickham. He was charming and amiable, two traits she had failed to see in Darcy.
Recently, however, her feelings for him had been evolving into something more like how a wife should feel about her husband. She wondered often why he had agreed to the marriage, when it was evident at times that he didn’t care for her.
She shook her head, applying cream to her slender face to remove the makeup and moisturize her skin. It wasn’t that he didn’t care for her, she felt. It was more that he cared for himself before anyone else. When she did or said something that he opposed, he made it known in no uncertain terms. She didn’t want to feel that her opinions were worthless, but when he berated her that was the way she felt.
She smoothed out the cream, closing her eyes. Against the back of her eyelids she watched the dancing people from the ball, the lovely gowns, Georgiana’s smiling, laughing face. She’d had a chance to meet up with her sisters and mother. Jane wasn’t taking the departure of her beloved Bingley well, though she was making a valiant effort. Elizabeth sat next to Jane on a comfortable couch, and they talked for a while. She told Jane she knew about what had happened. Jane had come back with some discomforting words.
Elizabeth opened her eyes and stared at herself in the mirror, remembering. It had taken some time before Jane opened up to her. And when she did, her words caused Elizabeth pain.
“Each letter of correspondence from Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst caused me pain. I doubt they even knew that.”
Elizabeth had her doubts. The two women Jane was speaking of knew exactly what they were doing with their sharp words and closed minds. But she dared not say that to Jane, as her sister had such fond feelings for the women. “How is it causing you pain, Jane?”
“They’re so happy for Bingley and this new woman he’s been seeing. They speak of it as if he and I were never together, never had feelings for each other. I love him, Lizzie. And I can never have him. How can I live like this?”
“You’ll manage to come back around, dear sister. There will be another man for you. I’m confident of that. With your beauty and charm, why any man would be lucky to have you as a wife.”
“But I don’t want any man, Lizzie. I want Bingley.”
“How long has it been since they left Netherfield?”
“About a month, I suppose.”
Elizabeth nodded. “I see that you’re still in pain over this, and it doesn’t surprise me. It’s been only a short time. You must give yourself time to breathe and time to grieve over this loss.”
“It pains me that your husband may have had something to do with it,” Jane mumbled, lowering her head.
Elizabeth reacted in shock, pulling back from her sister and staring at her with wide eyes. “What’s this? Whatever do you mean?”
“Miss Bingley has told me that Darcy worked with them to separate Bingley and me.”
“Worked with them?” Elizabeth repeated, stunned. “How did he do that?”
“He was never encouraging of the relationship. They say he knew from the beginning I wasn’t the one for Bingley, and that he mentioned it often when he was living with them. He said that… that we’re not on a level that such a marriage would be successful.” Jane looked at Elizabeth with teary eyes. “And then he married you. Why would he do such a thing, Lizzie? Why would he discourage his best friend’s love and life with someone who loves him more than herself?”
Elizabeth was still trying to digest the words she had heard. It didn’t surprise her that Darcy had discouraged the relationship. He had often mentioned it would never work, even before they were married. His feelings about people in a lower class of society, the “poor” people, had come to light the very first day she had met him. He had declined to dance with her simply because she didn’t have as much money as many of the other ladies at the party.
Her confusion as to why he’d agreed to marry her at all was stronger now. Her brow furrowed and her eyes moved all around the room without really seeing what she was looking at. “This makes no sense,” she breathed.
“That’s what I was thinking, as well,” Jane said. She was kneading her gloved hands i
n her lap, obviously trying to keep from crying.
Elizabeth pushed her anger down, reached over and took her sister’s hand, keeping her from kneading a hole in her gloves. “You must persevere, my dear. You must go on. I know this hurts you, and you’re going to feel that pain for some time. But you mustn’t let it keep you from your future, the plans that God has for you. Perhaps you can look at it in that manner, that God was protecting you from something that wasn’t good for you.”
“How can I believe that, Lizzie?” Jane’s voice trembled. “I love him desperately. I thought he loved me.”
“I believe he did.”
“Then why would he move away and reject me so?” A tear fell from Jane’s eye. Elizabeth wiped it away and ran her hand soothingly over her sister’s shoulder.
“You mustn’t cry. It will make your nose and eyes red. You don’t want the men to see you this way, do you?”
Jane shook her head. “I didn’t want to come. Mother insisted.”
“I’m quite sure she did,” Elizabeth said, nodding. “She wants you to get a husband soon, and not feel the hurt you have been feeling.”
“She was furious with Bingley and his family.”
“I’m certain of that, as well.”
“And she’s angry with Father and Darcy, too.”
“She is?” This was news to Elizabeth. None of these facts were mentioned in any of the correspondence she had received from her mother, her other sisters, or Jane herself.
“Yes. She blames Father for arranging the marriage between you and Darcy, and blames Darcy for Bingley’s departure.”
“Oh dear, that won’t make for holiday cheer this year.”
“I fear she’ll reject you because of your marriage.”
Elizabeth couldn’t help but smile. “Oh, now, don’t be a silly goose. Mother wouldn’t reject me or leave me out of the holidays because of something I cannot and could not control. She may have a few words for Darcy but she won’t hold me responsible.”
“She’ll have the most awful words for him, I assure you. From what she’s been saying to Father, I can only imagine what she’ll say to someone she doesn’t love.”
Elizabeth remembered her anger toward Darcy. She stared into the mirror, wondering what she should say to Darcy… if she should say anything at all. She wasn’t comfortable confronting Darcy. Her newly-found feelings for him were also getting in the way of her anger, causing her to feel more hurt than angry. She didn’t want to think Darcy was the same man she had met at that party so long ago when he was staying at Netherfield. She knew more about him than she ever thought she would, and though he had changed in some ways she wanted to hope that he wasn’t the same man he was before they were married.
From the way Jane talked, though, it did sound as if Darcy’s opinion of the relationship hadn’t changed even after their marriage. But why wouldn’t it? Elizabeth felt confusion as she thought about the many times he had mentioned it and that it wouldn’t survive. He had said that Bingley would walk away from Jane and that Elizabeth should prepare herself for such a disappointment on many occasions. It confused her more when she thought about how Darcy was in correspondence with her father and described him as a “friend.” What would be his objection to Bingley and Jane when he was a member of the family himself?
She rubbed the cream into her face and moved away from the dressing table. She enjoyed the feel of the new nightgown Darcy had bought her as it brushed against her skin. After the heavy dress she had worn to the ball, it was a great relief.
She ignored the sound of the mumbling voices, closed the door, and slipped into bed. She was asleep moments after her head hit the pillow.
Chapter 15
“Well, it doesn’t surprise me that things went the way they’ve gone,” Mrs. Bennet said in a huffy voice, pressing the needle through her patchwork quilt with fervor. “I knew from the beginning that the whole Bingley family was nothing but trouble. A bunch of snobs, if you ask me. My girl is worth more than the lot of them.”
Lydia giggled. “Oh, Mama, you know that’s not what you’ve been saying this whole time. You said—”
“I do not need to be reminded of my words from my daughter, Lydia,” her mother cut in. Lydia closed her mouth, staring at Mrs. Bennet.
“Mother, you know she’s right,” Mary said sensibly. “You can’t speak bad of them now, though I agree that Jane is worth more than such shallow-minded individuals. But that’s not the impression we were given. It wasn’t the impression he gave Jane. He was cruel to her and that’s all that can be said.”
“And you’re only saying that because she’s here in the room,” Lydia pointed out in a pouty voice, insulted that she had been cut off by her mother.
Jane and Elizabeth were sitting next to each other on the settee in front of the large window. As soon as her mother began talking about Bingley, Elizabeth reached over and grabbed Jane’s hand. They were holding on to each other tightly. Elizabeth ignored the intense heat and strength coming from her sister’s hand. Her fingers were being squeezed together, causing a bit of pain. She didn’t say anything, but listened to her mother and sisters going back and forth about the bad treatment of their oldest sister. Jane was equally silent.
Elizabeth knew it was coming, and when her mother turned to her she braced herself for it.
“Were you aware that your husband had something to do with this, Lizzie? Did you know he was putting our family out of the picture because we don’t meet up to his standards?”
Elizabeth tried to bite her tongue. What she wanted to say couldn’t possibly be said.
“Mother, of course I had no idea. You must remember that I wasn’t a friend to Darcy when he first arrived here. I wanted nothing to do with him. I barely wanted anything to do with him on the day of our marriage. I did not arrange that. I didn’t marry for love. I married because Father told me to and Darcy’s money has helped our family.”
Her mother shook her head. “I’m absolutely shocked that he could participate in such a ruse! I’m unhappy with him, you know this, Lizzie.”
“I know, Mother.”
“You must have words with him about this. You must confront him and tell him what a cad he’s been for doing such a thing to your sister.”
“Mother, if she confronts Darcy it will cause a stir in their marriage. They’ll row and she’ll be hurt by him. You know that his words can be very cutting. Don’t make her hurt herself in such a way.” Elizabeth looked at Jane with grateful eyes.
“Thank you,” she whispered.
“I’m infuriated that this can happen.”
“Mother, I do believe you’re taking this worse than our dear Jane!” Lydia cried. “You must calm yourself. You’re not the youngest woman anymore.”
“Besides,” Mary said. “It’s my belief that Elizabeth has forgiven Darcy his faults and feels differently about him than she did before. Perhaps he’s changed since he married her. He does seem kinder now.”
Elizabeth was relieved to hear Mary’s words. She blushed as her other sisters turned to look at her.
“Tell us, Lizzie!” Lydia cried. “Tell us how you’re doing!”
“I… I…” Elizabeth was lost for words, which practically never happened to her. “I’m doing well,” she said simply, blushing harder.
Lydia laughed loudly. “He’s got her tongue-tied! I truly never thought that would happen. Not our Lizzie!” She grinned wide. “So, he’s a fine gentleman of a husband now, is he? He’s not what you expected?”
Elizabeth thought about it for a moment, hesitating before she answered. “It’s not that he’s a fine gentleman, nor is he not what I expected. I fully acknowledge that he has wealth, stature, and is quite good-looking. But he’s what I expected him to be. He’s a loud, boorish man who likes to have everything his way. When things don’t go his way, he’s like a spoiled child who was never given any discipline.”
“That’s surprising, I must say,” Mrs. Bennet said, raising her eyebrows at
her daughter. “His father was a gentleman that everyone adored. He had many friends. Everyone expected Mr. Darcy to turn out in a similar fashion.”
“Darcy does have a lot of friends, Mama.” Elizabeth found herself defending her husband, and was given looks of surprise from Jane and Kitty. “He just has a different set of friends.”
“Friends who can’t trust him, perhaps,” Mrs. Bennet scoffed. “Friends he has business dealings with. But no close friends to confide in or who would confide in him.”
“You’re being unfair,” Elizabeth countered. “He’s different from his father, and he has many flaws, but he’s… he’s…” She blushed again and looked away from her mother. “He can be a gentleman, and has a great deal of honor.”
“That’s not what you said before, Lizzie,” Lydia said. “You were angry when Father announced you would marry him, and you sulked like a child for weeks!”
“I did not sulk!” Elizabeth replied, hotly. “I protested a change in my life that was forced upon me. And the situation has now changed. I have gotten to know him much better.”
“I should think you have,” Mrs. Bennet nodded. “A woman should always know her husband’s character, flaws and all. And I’m sure you’ve got a list of Mr. Darcy’s.”
“Oh, Mama,” Elizabeth shook her head in frustration. “I must be honest with you all: I’ve grown to admire Darcy in many ways. He’s an enigmatic man, with a strong countenance and a sharp mind. I know that I feel safe with him. I know that I don’t need to fear anyone, for he’ll come to my aide and my protection in a moment’s notice, should it be required.”
“You’re his advocate now,” Mary said in a voice that implied she was impressed with the change. “That’s admirable. He must be far different than we imagined.”
Elizabeth shook her head in a resigned way. “No, he’s also self-centered and hard-headed, just as he showed when we first met him. He looks down on those with less than he and doesn’t keep it a secret. However, in the past few months since we married I’ve noticed he’s quieter about that in conversation, but I’m certain it is still in his mind. He hasn’t changed so much that his thoughts are different. He’s just quieter about it.”
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