by Myers, AJ
Whatever happened to not having to fight someone all the time just to be happy?
“It’ll all work out, baby,” Nathan murmured, kissing the top of my head. “You should go talk to her. It’s always been the two of you, Em. I won’t be what busts up the truest friendship I’ve seen in more than four centuries.”
“Yeah, I guess I should.” I reached up and pulled his lips down to mine for one last kiss before whispering, “You don’t deserve for her to hate you, baby. The only one who really had that right was me, and I forgave you. Kim’s just going to have to trust me on this one.”
“What are you going to do?” he asked when I stepped out of his arms and pulled my shirt over my head.
“I’m going to give her the clothes I brought her,” I told him, shrugging. When he looked dubious about the success of that plan, I laughed. “Kim loves clothes more than food or air. I’m hoping the sight of designer labels will make her calm down enough to see reason.”
“And if she doesn’t?” He looked like he thought that was a much more likely outcome. I couldn’t really blame him after Kim’s performance with the door.
“I’ll improvise.”
Chapter 30: Seeing The Light…And Really Wishing I’d Stayed In The Dark
Despite the fact that I’d felt so confident about my plan when I told Nathan what I was going to do, I found myself hesitating outside Kim’s door. There was a hole in it the size of a crater where she had lobbed the fireball at me, and a matching one in the wall. Skippy wasn’t going to be happy. I’m sure he hadn’t been planning on a witch hopped up on angel blood destroying his home when he’d volunteered it as a refuge for the injured.
When I couldn’t put it off any longer, I took a deep breath and tapped softly on what was left of the door. I hadn’t really expected an answer, and I didn’t get one, but I knew she was inside. I could hear her crying, her soft sniffles making me feel like I was about half an inch tall. Sighing, I picked up the box I’d brought from the warehouse and opened the door slowly. I thought maybe she was over her temper tantrum, but you can never be too safe.
I didn’t spot her immediately, so I called out “Kim?”
“Go away, Ember,” she muttered.
I found her sitting against the wall in the corner of the room. She wiped at her cheeks hurriedly as I turned to face her, but she wasn’t quick enough. I saw the tears glimmering on her cheeks, her long lashes, and felt even worse than I had as I stood outside the door, listening to her sniffle.
“Don’t be like that, Kim,” I told her, plopping the box down in front of her and sliding down the wall next to her. “Come on. Talk to me. You know you want to.”
She glared at me and wiped her nose instead.
“Okay, then,” I told her, reaching for the box. “If you don’t want to talk to me, I guess you don’t want this stuff, either. I’ll just take it and trash it.”
She didn’t take the bait and I sighed, praying for patience. I dug around in the box and pulled out a black and white striped Michael Kors cashmere sweater. Kim’s eyes flared wide and a longing look crossed her face, but she stayed strong. That was all right, though. I had more. DSquared2 jeans came next, and I made a point of dangling them in front of her before suggesting that maybe Ainsley would like them. Kim made a small sound in her throat, her expression agonized, but didn’t say a word.
I pulled out a couple more outfits, watching as her face got tighter and tighter and her eyes got bright. I had to give it to her. She had held out a lot longer than I’d given her credit for. Even when I pulled a Vince leather jacket out of the box, she just bit her lip and whimpered a little.
I’d saved the best for last, though. As much as Kim liked clothes, she positively loved shoes. I sighed again, as if I thought it was a real shame that I was going to have to throw everything out, and then pulled out a pair of soft leather Prada ankle boots. When she just whimpered again, my patience reached its limits. Calling up a ball of my signature golden fire, flames that were guaranteed to incinerate anything, I dangled the boots over it. If that didn’t get her attention, I was done.
“Okay!” she cried, grabbing the boots out of my hand just before they touched the flames. “You are so mean, Ember! Fine. You want to talk, talk.”
Kim was so easy.
But the second she was ready to talk to me again, I couldn’t figure out what to say. I wouldn’t defend Nathan’s actions to her, I didn’t even defend them to myself, but I couldn’t have her hating him for the rest of her life, either. That put me between a hard place and an even harder place. I mean, how do you make someone not hate someone else when you’re the reason they hate them in the first place?
“I won’t take back what I said,” Kim muttered, her head down and her fingers caressing the leather cuff on the boot in her lap. “I meant every word, Em. I won’t apologize for it, either.”
“I didn’t ask you to,” I told her, shrugging. “Nathan doesn’t even want you to. If it means anything, he agreed with every word you said. He feels really shitty about what happened, Kim. You don’t have to forgive him, but maybe you could cut him a little slack?”
She grimaced and stared down at her boots again. Finally, though, she nodded her head. It was just one little bob, not like she really wanted to do it but like she had to, but it was enough. I stood up and dumped the entire box of clothes in her lap before bending down to give her a boa constrictor-type hug.
“You’re too good for him. You know that, right?” she whispered, hugging me back.
“Yeah, but I like him, anyway,” I told her, giggling when she rolled her eyes at me.
Deciding not to push my luck where Nathan was concerned, I changed the subject. While she went through her new things, I filled her in on what she had missed. They hadn’t told her how serious my condition was, and when she found out I had nearly died—again—she got all teary again. Of course, that brought up the subject of the angel blood.
“So, I could be immortal?” Kim asked quietly.
“I don’t know,” I told her honestly. “Tyler said a little of his blood wouldn’t make you immortal, but I’m not sure what he meant by a little. Of course, the only way to test the theory is to kill you. Worst case scenario? If you’re not immortal, you’re dead.”
“Yeah, I see your point,” she agreed, nodding. “I think I’ll just wait and find out the good old fashioned way. If I stop aging, I guess I’ll have my answer. Speaking of Ty, how did he take it? You know, you and Nathan getting back together?”
“Tyler’s the one who dropped me off on his doorstep.”
“Tyler did that?” Kim asked, looking and sounding shocked. “Our Tyler?”
“Yeah,” I said, rolling my eyes at her.
“Tyler Jordan? You’re sure?”
“Yes, Kim,” I said, frowning when she just looked confused. “Why are you so surprised, Kim?”
“No reason,” she said, dropping her eyes and starting to fold her clothes to avoid making eye contact with me. “I just thought…”
“You thought what?” I demanded, laying my hands over hers to stop her from avoiding both my gaze and the question.
“Seriously, it doesn’t matter,” she said, shrugging. “I guess I just read the signals you guys were putting off all wrong.”
You and Jordan were putting on one hell of a show, Nathan’s voice repeated in my mind as my hands fell away from Kim’s and I sat back with a small huff of surprise. Had they all thought Tyler and I…that we were a couple? Had we played our parts so well that night that even my best friends hadn’t been able to tell the difference?
Could you? a little voice asked in the back of my mind. Remembering the way I’d felt that night, the happiness I’d found in Tyler’s arms as we danced…
Yeah, that was a damn good question. And one, I was horrified to realize, that I didn’t have an answer to.
“Em, I know you don’t want to hear it, but Tyler has a serious thing for you,” Kim said, peeking up at me through her lash
es like she was afraid I was going to bite her head off. “Are you really so blind that you can’t see it?”
“We’re friends,” I told her, my voice sounding weak even to me.
“Yeah,” she agreed, nodding. “But there’s something else between you, something intense that everyone else can see and you seem only too happy to ignore. You didn’t see him that night, after we’d banished Bastian. When you stopped breathing, he totally lost it. He kept screaming at someone to bring you back, but there was nobody there. Seriously, it was kind of scary.”
But there had been someone there with us. The Nerd King. I knew Tyler had seen Death that night, had even talked to him. I would have bet money that Tyler’s imaginary friend had been the very geek who’d screwed up my afterlife.
“He loves you, Em,” Kim continued. “And do you know what I think?”
“No, what?” I whispered, the tiny ball of sadness that had risen in my chest at the start of her explanation growing to basketball-sized proportions.
“I think there’s a part of you that loves him, too,” Kim said gently.
I wanted to deny it, but I couldn’t. There was too much evidence in favor of her argument. I thought back to those couple of months without him and felt my tearless eyes start to burn. I had missed him so much. I had missed him even more than I had missed Kim and Blake, who I’d known and loved my whole life. I had missed his smile and the sound of his voice and the way he could make me feel warm and safe.
I had missed him. Because Tyler made me happy.
“But I love Nathan,” I said, my voice so soft and sad that I saw Kim’s eyes fill with tears in response to it. “How can I love Nathan and love Tyler, too? That’s so wrong on so many levels, Kim.”
“I know,” she said, reaching over to take my hand. I held on to her with a death grip, the only constant in my ever-shifting world. “I know you love Nathan, Em. And I know you completed the soul mate bond because Shea let it slip to Mom while we were waiting for you to wake up after the change. That’s why I was so confused by the vibes between you and Ty. I mean, that’s some serious magic right there, even for us. I was gonna ask Mom about it the night we went to the club, but with us getting shot at by a bunch of witch hunters, trying to find a way to get you to let me murder your boyfriend, and you disappearing with what’s-her-name, it kind of slipped my mind.”
“Understandable,” I muttered, nodding.
“Don’t worry, Emmy,” she said, pulling me closer to her and throwing an arm around my shoulders, “we’ll figure it out. We always do, right?”
I didn’t even dignify that with an answer. There was so much about me and my life I hadn’t figured out that it would have filled an entire library.
Seeing the blooming sadness on my face, Kim was quick to change the subject. I was happy to let her. Even when we moved back to angelic blood and weird powers, though, part of my mind stayed stuck on Tyler and Nathan and the mess I was going to have to deal with at some point.
Blake was the first one brave enough to enter the room. He didn’t look all that surprised when he saw us sitting there, my head on Kim’s shoulder, as we attempted to make just the tips of our fingernails catch fire like we had seen a witch do in a movie once. He stopped just inside the door, shaking his head at us, then stuck his head back out and shouted the all clear that it was safe to come inside.
“I see you two made up, as usual,” he said as he slid down on Kim’s other side and pulled her closer to him.
“Kim could never stay mad at me,” I told him, forcing myself to smile. “She worships me. Didn’t you know?”
“She threatened to barbecue a pair of Prada boots in front of me is what she means,” Kim corrected, scowling. “Besides, I kind of love the little brat. It’s a good thing, too, because nobody else will put up with her.”
I smiled, really smiled, when Zan and Ainsley walked in, their arms wrapped around each other’s waists. Zan immediately made a smartass remark about Kim’s new radical hairdo, which started a war to see who could be the most insulting between the two of them, but Ainsley caught my eye and smiled. She looked peaceful, happy. I was proud to know I’d played a part in that, if even just a small one.
Skippy was the next one in the door. He looked worried until he saw me sitting there all in one piece. Kim immediately apologized for the door…and the wall…and the other door, but Skippy just waved it off like it was no big deal. He became her idol, though, when he told her she was free to go shopping in the warehouse for herself when she was feeling up to it.
“What did you do to him?” Tyler asked, looking horrified, having joined us just in time to hear Skippy agree to let me and Kim give him a makeover.
“I was mean to him,” I told him, shrugging, as he flopped down next to me on the floor and stretched out, using my thigh as a pillow. “Strange what a little sarcasm can do to a man, huh? Skippy’s not so bad, though. He just needs some friends.”
“No, beautiful, it’s you,” he sighed, closing his eyes and pulling my arm across his chest. “You just have that effect on people.”
I smiled down at him tenderly, my heart aching as what both Skippy and Kim had said repeated itself over and over in my mind. Tyler looked tired and stressed out and completely happy as he laid there, my hand held over his heart.
Everyone else was ignoring us, so I leaned down and whispered, “Ty? Do you love me?”
“Always and forever,” he said with a beautiful, tired kind of smile. “But, if you’re about to ask me to do something that requires movement, I’m going to disappoint you.”
“No, I’m not going to ask you for anything,” I told him, trying to keep the heartache out of my voice.
“I was only kidding, beautiful,” he sighed, barely cracking his eyes open to look at me. I don’t know what he saw, but something in his expression changed, became soft and sad. “You could ask me for anything and everything, Em, and I would move the heavens to give it to you.”
I know, I thought sadly as his eyes drifted closed again, that’s the problem.
I didn’t want Tyler to be in love with me and I really didn’t want to love him—not that way, anyway. I wanted things between us to stay the way they were. I didn’t want to hurt him, but I already knew I was going to.
Because even though I might love Tyler, my heart would always belong to Nathan. I had made my choice and I didn’t regret it. But, what did that mean for me and Tyler? How long would he be able to stand it, being in love with me when I couldn’t return that love? How long would it be before it became too much and I lost him?
Skippy was giving everyone their instructions for relocating the critically injured when the last of our group arrived. Grams and Mrs. Val walked right in and took a seat, their unsurprised expressions telling me they already knew about the move Skippy was proposing and had agreed to it.
Nathan stopped just inside the door and looked right at Kim, nobody else. He was giving her the choice. If she didn’t want him there, he was ready to turn around and walk away.
I looked over at her, biting my lip as I waited to see what she would do. For a long, tense second she just looked at him, her eyes so cold that I felt the temperature in the room drop about ten degrees. When her eyes flickered to me and she saw the look on my face, she caved a little. Turning back to Nathan, she gave him a stiff nod. The gesture didn’t exactly scream friendship, but at least she was allowing him into the room.
The second his eyes fell on me, they narrowed and his lips pressed into a hard line. I knew what had his undies in a bunch even before he walked over and kicked Tyler, none too gently, in the leg with the toe of his boot.
“Jordan, would you mind getting your head out of my girlfriend’s lap?” he growled.
Tyler, who didn’t even bother to open his eyes, grinned and flipped him off.
“Tyler, please behave,” Grams said, sounding harassed, having watched the display. “We have more important things to concern ourselves with than testosterone-fueled stupidity
.”
Tyler sighed, loudly, but sat up anyway. Of course, he wasn’t giving in without a fight. Relinquishing his place to Nathan, he made a production out of scooting around to my other side, between me and Kim, and laying his head on both of our laps. Blake turned a snort of laughter into a coughing fit and Kim and I rolled our eyes at each other. Nathan didn’t look very happy, but since Blake wasn’t making a big deal out of it he kept his mouth shut and let it go.
“So, we’re just going to sit there and wait for them to come after us again?” Kim asked, turning her attention back to Skippy since the Neanderthals had concluded their pissing contest.
“Yes, that is exactly what we are going to do,” Skippy said, smiling down at her. “Why go to the enemy when you can bring the enemy to you? It is always best to wage war on a battlefield you are familiar with, my dear.”
“Now then,” he said, clapping his hands together and addressing the room as a whole. “Rooms have been assigned to all of you so that you can rest. It was a long night and I fear our trials have only just begun. I trust that you ladies,” he bowed in Grams’ and Mrs. Val’s direction, “are more than capable of organizing the families of the injured. Those who can be moved will go to a more secure location, those whose condition will not allow it will remain here under the protection of my guard.
“Ember,” he said, gracing me with a sweet smile, “if you would be so kind as to join me in my office, there is a matter we must attend to.”
I was really going to have to teach him how to talk. If he got much more formal, he was going to start sounding like a Shakespearean actor for real. All that was missing was a ‘thy’ and a ‘thou’ thrown in every couple of words.
“Sure thing, Skippy,” I told him, nodding and trying to stand up. To my surprise, Nathan wouldn’t let me and Tyler was actually putting pressure on my leg with his head.