by T. A. Chase
“Shit,” Tyler hissed, flinging his head back and breathing deep.
“Remember you can always stop this if it gets too much for you.” Ren kissed him softly before stepping away. “I would never ask you to do anything I didn’t think you could handle.”
“Have you ever been tied up?”
Curiosity made him ask. His other lovers would never give up control to allow anyone else to tie them up.
Nodding, Ren pinched Tyler’s nipple between his thumb and finger, giving it a little twist. “Sure. Before I went to Bosnia, my lover and I would switch off. Since I got back, I haven’t found anyone I trust enough to let them do it to me and I’m a bit of a control freak now. The flashbacks have a tendency to get worse at certain times or in certain situations. If I’m in charge of a scene, then I know I won’t have one. It’s not very sexy to have your partner freak out on you in the middle of sex.”
Tyler understood and gestured for Ren to come closer. Tyler leaned forward and gave his lover a quick kiss. “I was just wondering.”
“Why? You having fantasies of me tied up and at your mercy?” Ren rested his forehead on Tyler’s shoulder.
“No. I’ve always been more turned on by giving up control than taking it.” He bumped their cheeks together.
“Good.” Ren smacked him lightly on the hip with the strap.
The sting tore through him, coming to rest in his groin and he shouted. He panted as Ren stared at him.
“You’re so beautiful like this. I can’t wait to see my stripes across your skin. Are you willing to try it, love?”
He nodded.
“Perfect. First I want to plug you. Make sure you’re nice and stretched for me because I’m not going to be able to take the time to do it after.”
The thought of a plug didn’t bother Tyler. He’d used one before and liked the feeling of being filled. Ren slid his hands down to spread Tyler’s ass cheeks, exposing his hole. His lover knelt and blew a puff of air over the puckered opening, causing Tyler to shiver. The pop of the lube sounded loud in the empty barn.
Cool slickness eased the breeching of Tyler’s ass by Ren’s finger, allowing it to bury deep. Ren removed his finger and pushed two in. Tyler rocked back, fucking himself on the digits filling him. Two became three and then four.
“You’re ready for the plug. It’s close to the size of my cock, so we won’t need to worry.” Ren patted his hip.
Bracing his feet, he accepted the hard rubber plug in with nothing more than a pleasure filled moan. He yelped when Ren jostled it and the point hit his prostate.
Ren’s laugh was pure seduction. “Just as I thought. It fits you well.” Ren slapped his ass, making the toy move again.
“You enjoy torturing me, don’t you?” Tyler shot the question over his shoulder at the older man.
Dark eyes twinkling, Ren smiled. “Me? Torture you? I’d never do that.” He paused. “Not much anyway.”
Tyler shook his head and faced forward, closing his eyes. He took a deep breath, remembering what his first Dom lover told him. “Before starting a scene, breathe and find a calm place to start from.” Tyler found that giving up control eased something inside him and the longer the scene lasted, the more he was taken from his body and put in a place of serenity.
“Oh, one more thing. Almost forgot.”
He opened his eyes to find Ren standing in front of him again. The dark haired man held a piggin’ string in his hand. Wide eyed, he watched Ren tie a perfect figure eight around his balls and cock, creating a make-shift cock ring.
“Told you I was good at tying things. This way you can’t come until I let you.” Ren’s breath warmed Tyler’s ear. “I want you to come on my cock.”
“Fuck.”
His cock was swollen and leaking pre-come already. A little sheen of sweat glistened on his skin. He tightened his muscles around the plug. “Please, Ren.”
Ren strolled around behind him and there was a rustle as Ren must have picked up the strap again.
“When I’m done, you’ll be lucky to remember my name.”
He wanted to make a smart ass remark, but the bite of the leather across his ass erased all thought from his mind. The pain was exquisite. Biting and deep. It mixed with pleasure, spiraling and growing bigger with each strip landing on his skin.
They fell into a rhythm and like everything else they did together, they were perfect. Tyler undulated, begging with his body and cries, for whatever Ren would give him. Ren strapped Tyler from shoulder to thigh and he alternated the strength of the blows. One heavy so Tyler felt it in his bones, the next so light, he would wonder if it ever connected until the burn began.
Tyler whimpered, his mind becoming overwhelmed with pain and pleasure. The welts stung when his sweat ran into them. His desire swelled, causing his bound prick to ache with the need to come.
“Please,” he begged, too lost to care about how needy he sounded.
“Not yet.”
The next stroke landed across his ass, jiggling the plug, which rubbed against his gland and made him shout. Soon though, he lost the ability to think and vocalize. He sank into a state of peace where the only things in existence were Ren, the strap and him.
Suddenly, the strap hit the barn floor and he heard the rasp of a zipper. He protested weakly as Ren jerked the plug out, Tyler’s muscles trying to keep it in. He grunted when Ren rammed his cock into Tyler’s ass.
“Damn, you’re still tight and your ass is burning. I’m not going to last long, love. Fucking unbelievably hot.”
Crying out, Tyler tried to push back or move somehow, but Ren held him tight and dictated what happened.
“Ren, I need to come,” he sobbed.
Ren dragged a hand off Tyler’s hip around to where the end of the piggin’ string hung. “Come,” he ordered.
Tyler screamed as his cock sprang free and his climax ripped through him. He lost consciousness, barely hearing Ren shout his name and flood his passage with hot liquid.
He didn’t know how much time passed before he became aware of Ren rubbing the feeling back into his arms. Shifting, he found he was lying in one of the stalls on a clean horse blanket and a bed of fresh wood shavings.
“Hey there.” Ren’s gaze held concern. “I was getting worried there. I never fucked a man unconscious. Wasn’t sure how long you’d be out.”
“I’ve never come so hard, I passed out. We’re even.” The soft wool of the horse blanket scratched his back and he grimaced.
“Now that you’re awake, roll over on your stomach and I’ll put some salve on your back. It’ll ease the pain and ensure there’s no infection.”
Ren helped him roll over and Tyler rested his cheeks on his hands. He shivered as the cool, slick ointment spread over his burning skin.
“I didn’t break the skin, but you’ll be feeling those marks for days.”
He murmured something, relaxed, and let his happiness wash over him. Ren hummed softly while treating Tyler’s back. When his lover was done, Tyler reached behind to touch Ren’s thigh.
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, baby. Why don’t you take a nap?”
A sheet covered him. He squinted over his shoulder at Ren.
Ren smirked. “As much as I’d like to stare at your ass, I can’t have you naked in here. Plus the sheet will keep dirt off the welts. Don’t worry. I brought it down from the house.”
Sighing, he closed his eyes, let go, and fell asleep to the sound of Ren working in the barn.
§ § § §
“It was hard for you to leave JT, wasn’t it?”
Ren’s quiet question surprised Tyler. He looked up from where he laid, sprawled on his stomach in front of the unlit fireplace. He’d been reading a breeding magazine. He rolled to his side, wincing at the twinge of pain from his back and studied Ren, who stared calmly back at him.
His lover had been quiet all afternoon and evening after Tyler awakened from his nap and helped Ren take care of the horses. When they finished, they wen
t back up to the main house and he showered while Ren cooked dinner. He knew Ren had been thinking about something. Tyler figured the older man would say something when he was ready.
He dropped his gaze and ran a finger over the texture of the rug he laid on. “Sure it was. JT’s an ass at times, but he’s my brother.”
“Keith and Isaiah are my brothers. I love them, but I wouldn’t hesitate to leave them if I wasn’t happy. It couldn’t have been a love for the rodeo that made you stay with him.”
Tyler knew Ren wouldn’t give up unless Tyler told him the truth. He stood gingerly and walked to a window, staring out into the black night.
“He’s my responsibility. I’m the younger twin, yet I’ve always been the one to keep him out of trouble or clean up after him when I couldn’t stop something from happening.” He rested his forehead against the cool glass. “Momma died when we were fourteen. I remember the day she stopped fighting. The cancer had eaten her up inside and she didn’t want to live in pain anymore.”
His heart hurt at the memory of how pale and tired his mother had looked when she’d called JT and him into her room.
“I’d already been taking care of Dad and JT since Momma became bedridden. Neither one of them was handling her dying well. I felt I had to be the one making sure they ate and stuff got done.” He took a breath, easing the ache in his chest. “She called us in and told me I had to be the responsible one. I had to be strong. Momma said JT wasn’t like me. He was fragile and needed someone to watch over him. From the moment we buried her until the day I came back home, that’s what I did.”
“That’s why you let men tie up and give you orders during sex. You want to let go of the decision-making process. You just want to feel and not think.”
He watched in the glass as Ren stood. Strolling over to him, Ren encircled Tyler’s waist. He leaned back, accepting the support and understanding Ren offered him.
“Exactly. I don’t need it all the time, but sometimes it gets to be too much and having control taken from me eases the pressure.”
Ren’s lips brushed the crown of his hair. “I’m the opposite, though before Bosnia, it didn’t matter. Now I need the control. Feeling too much is what causes my flashbacks. When my mind gets overwhelmed with sensations, it short circuits. That’s why being in charge works best for me.”
“Guess we’re a perfect match then,” Tyler commented.
Laughter rumbled in Ren’s chest and the sound comforted Tyler.
They shared a kiss. Giving and taking. Neither needed to play rough all the time, but they understood what made the other man happy.
“Let’s go to bed,” Ren suggested.
Tyler nodded.
Their lovemaking that night was slow and easy. Each man was content to take his time and explore his lover.
Right before he drifted off, Tyler heard Ren slip from the bed and leave the room. Ren spoke to someone in the hallway. Isaiah must be home, Tyler thought as he surrendered to dreams.
§ § § §
Tyler woke up to the sound of his phone ringing. Climbing out of Ren’s bed, he dug through the pile of his clothes to find his jeans. He tugged out the cell phone and groaned as he checked the number. JT. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to answer it, but decided it probably would be better to talk to his twin then have the man keep calling him until he answered.
“Hello, JT.”
Glancing at the bed, he noticed that Ren wasn’t there. The alarm clock on the night stand read one-thirty. Ren was probably out in the barn, making sure the pregnant mares were okay.
“Hey, Tyler.”
Something didn’t sound right.
“Are you okay?”
JT grunted. “Yeah.”
Tyler scrubbed a hand over his hair and sat on the bed. JT wasn’t drunk, or at least didn’t sound drunk, but something was bothering him.
“What do you want? It’s one in the morning.”
“I know what time it is, Tyler. I wanted to tell you I’m sorry.”
Surprised, he held the phone away from his ear and stared at it for a moment. He put it back and said, “You’re sorry? What’s going on, JT? You’ve never apologized to me before. Is Dad making you do this?”
“No. Dad and I talked, but then I called a friend. He made me see that I was a selfish, spoiled brat and I needed to start changing things or I’d find myself alone.” JT swallowed loudly. “I don’t want to be alone, Tyler.”
Tyler flopped back on the bed and looked up at the ceiling. “You won’t be alone, JT. You’ll always be able to find someone to spend time with.”
“Finding someone to spend time with isn’t the same as being with family. I’ve figured it out with a little help from my friend.”
The word “friend” was said with a different tone and Tyler wondered who JT was talking about.
“So I’m sorry, Tyler. I’ll do my best to support you and not expect you to take care of things for me.”
JT’s words sounded sincere, but Tyler wasn’t going to hold his breath until he saw the changes for real.
“Thanks for calling me and apologizing, JT. Maybe we can get together before you head back out on the circuit.”
He needed his brother’s love, so not accepting JT’s apology wasn’t an option.
“Cool. I’ll see you sometime this week when you get back from Alston’s.”
Shutting his phone, he let it drop on the comforter beside him and chuckled. He really wanted to meet the person who could get JT to see just how terrible he was acting. He sat up, snatched his jeans off the floor and pulled them on. It was time to get Ren and drag the man back inside. Since both of them were awake, there were better things they could be doing like messing up the sheets on the bed again.
Chapter Twelve
The buzz of his cell phone woke Ren up two days later. He reached across Tyler’s prone body to grab it off the night stand and frowned. It was Keith.
“Hey, bro, you’re up early.”
“I can’t take it, Ren. Make the screaming stop.”
Keith’s tortured whisper made Ren’s blood cold.
Fuck. He shot up in bed, his sudden movement waking Tyler. His lover stared at him with a dazed expression.
“Where are you, Keith?” He poked Tyler in the hip.
“Get Isaiah,” he mouthed.
“I’m in Iraq.” Keith’s tone said he thought Ren was crazy for asking. A moment of silence and then Keith said, “But I can’t be there. I must be in San Diego?”
The confusion in Keith’s words broke Ren’s heart. He understood what his youngest brother was going through, having been there himself. He moved to the edge of the bed, bracing his feet on the floor and resting his elbows on his knees. He hadn’t noticed Tyler was gone until both Tyler and Isaiah stepped in the room.
Keith was quiet, but Ren could still hear him breathing. Isaiah held his own phone.
“Call Rick. Tell him Keith’s having a flashback and he might be armed.”
Isaiah nodded and dialed Rick’s number. Tyler joined Ren on the bed, lying his hand on Ren’s back and letting Ren know he was there.
“Talk to me, Keith. What’s happening?” He kept his own voice low and even. Sounding worried or excited could drive Keith deeper into the delusion.
Isaiah murmured in the background.
“They’re all around me. I can hear them talking. I told them to stop. I don’t want to shoot them. They’re just kids.”
Anguish tore at Ren. He’d never talked about the war with Keith. His own memories were still fresh even after all the years. Maybe he should have tried talking to Keith about his own experiences.
“They’re not real, Keith. You won’t have to kill anyone. Not anymore. You’re safe in your room. No one’s going to harm you.”
He heard a noise in the background over his phone. He glanced up and Isaiah nodded. Hersch was there. Isaiah’s friend would be able to talk Keith down. He stayed on the phone. Ren couldn’t make out what was being said, but it sou
nded like the situation was under control.
“Alston?”
Startled, he jerked when a deeper voice came on the phone. “Yeah. How is he?”
“Tired. I gave him one of the pills his doctor prescribed. He didn’t have a gun, but he did have a knife. I’ll take it with me.”
“Good. Glad you were there, Hersch.” Ren slumped forward as Tyler rubbed his back.
“So am I. I’ll get him settled, call his therapist and set up an appointment for him. The guy said the flashbacks might get more frequent as they talked more.”
He sighed. “That’s rough on you.”
“Can’t be helped. When I’m not around, my fiancée will be and she’ll call me if it happens again.” Hersch’s voice faded for a second. “I’ll have Keith call you later when he’s calmer.”
“Appreciate it and thanks again, Rick.”
“We’re all brothers-in-arms, Alston. We help each other. Try to relax. Things are fine here.” Rick hung up.
Ren closed his phone and tossed it on the bed. Burying his head in his hands, he shuddered.
“Rick got things covered?” Isaiah stood in the doorway.
He nodded. “Gave him meds and will get an appointment set up him.”
“Okay. Well, I’m going back to bed. I’ll talk to you later.”
Tyler waited until they were alone before standing and offering his hand to Ren.
“Let’s take a shower, pack a lunch and go for a ride. We know you’re not going back to sleep.”
Ren grunted and let Tyler help him to his feet. His lover was right. It was better to be outside doing something than lying in bed, staring up at the ceiling.
It was probably the fastest shower he’d taken with Tyler. He wasn’t interested in playing and Tyler respected his distance. They dressed and he went to get the horses ready while Tyler put together lunch for them to have later on.
They met outside the main barn. Tyler slung the packed bags onto Gonzo’s haunches. Ren watched Tyler swing a jean-clad leg over Gonzo’s back, presenting him with a drool-worthy view of lean shoulders tapering into a small waist and firm ass. His cock twitched and he smiled. No matter how caught up in his problems he might be, he had a feeling Tyler would always manage to grab his interest.