Kai Li sighed and left the bed. Mei Ling sat up and listened to the sounds from the living room. Jack Wong’s slurry speech was too muffled to make out specific words, but Mei Ling knew what he wanted: forgiveness and understanding. He’d shown up in the middle of the night many times over the past few months. Each time Kai Li learned more of the story. Suk Suk insisted he was simply a go-between, not a gang member or leader. He claimed the gangsters forced him to bring Siew into the country to cover a gambling debt.
When the tong leaders had learned he was going to Guangzhou, they arranged for the papers that said Siew was his orphaned niece. Suk Suk arranged the indenture where she lived now and gave them the payment from it to cover her travel expenses.
He insisted that Siew would have been dead by now of starvation or disease had he not brought her away from the streets of Guangzhou. He even suggested that they should thank him for saving her. If Mei Ling wasn’t terrified for Siew, she might have felt sorry for the man.
Kai Li returned in just a few minutes.
“He’s gone already?” Mei Ling asked.
“No,” he replied. “We are going out.”
“What!?” Outrage woke her up entirely. She sat up and glared at the man in front of her.
“I do this for . . . her.” His voice broke.
Furious, Mei Ling replied, “Becoming his friend will do her no good! You keep too much peace, husband. Sometimes fighting back hard is the solution, not being . . . submissive.” The contempt in her voice was obvious.
Kai Li stared at her, his neck pulsing with pent-up anger. He looked as if he would argue back, but he closed the door and left her simmering in the dark.
Mei Ling took some deep breaths, hoping to calm her hammering heart. Her anxiety was destroying the harmony in their home. She hadn’t felt any true peace in months. Mei Ling feared she would be bitter and angry for the rest of her life if they lost Siew.
Quan Yin, help me find a measure of peace even if . . . She could hardly let herself think it. If they lost Siew she didn’t want to ever feel harmony again. Then she looked at Joy and Siew and Bo in bed. Somehow her parents had found a way to continue without being consumed by dark thoughts after they lost two children.
Quan Yin, help me find peace and strength.
Mei Ling came out to the living room when Kai Li returned from his outing with Suk Suk.
“What more did you discover, husband?” she asked as respectfully and as calmly as she could muster.
They sat close on the couch.
He recounted what he’d learned from his outing. “His gambling debt is to a San Francisco–based tong. To pay in full he must deliver Siew when she becomes a woman.”
As he spoke a pit opened in Mei Ling’s belly.
Kai Li continued, “He wants my reassurance that we won’t hide Siew from him.”
“What?” Mei Ling asked, outraged that Suk Suk wanted them to quell his fears.
“The Pardees paid the indenture fee to Suk Suk, which he gave to the tong to cover the expense of bringing Siew here. He knows we can topple his delicate plan. If I stop working for them, the Pardees will expect Suk Suk to refund their payment, and he does not have the money.”
“Oh,” Mei Ling replied, more fully understanding the bind she had placed Suk Suk in.
Kai Li added more: “He also mentioned he is terrified the tong will discover Siew is living with us, then seemed to regret he said it out loud.”
Mei Ling’s lips pulled up into a smile. “The tong doesn’t know where she lives?”
Kai Li nodded slowly.
Mei Ling’s understanding of their situation transformed entirely. Her body buzzed with hope and opportunity stirred as she realized their advantage over Suk Suk.
“He needs us to cooperate with him!” she declared.
Kai Li agreed. “He’s afraid we will leave with her and he won’t be able to find Siew, but if he takes her now he’ll have a very large debt to pay—to a well-connected White family.”
Mei Ling scoffed. “He and I fear the same thing: Siew disappearing.”
Kai Li nodded. “He’s also frightened for his own life. The tong will be furious if they learn Siew is living with a family that cares about her future well-being. Their power comes from secrecy, staying in the shadows. He’s betrayed their way of doing business and put them at risk. They don’t want the attention we’ll bring to them if they claim her. A girl with a family is safe. We’re the sunshine they fear.”
“Oh, husband,” Mei Ling exclaimed. “This is very good news. Thank you.”
Kai Li said, “Siew isn’t entirely safe, but I’m reassured that we have time to secure her future.”
Mei Ling nodded and smiled weakly. She was relieved that Suk Suk, not the tong, was the primary threat to Siew, but she couldn’t allow this situation to go on for years. The fear and uncertainty would destroy her. Something had to be done before Suk Suk, in his weakness, revealed Siew’s location to the tong.
Mei Ling carefully opened the envelope addressed in the American fashion to Mrs. Kai Li Chinn. It was dated November 15, 1924—eight weeks ago and many months after the date on Jah Jeh’s previous letter. Had her sister really gone so long without writing?
Dearest sister,
I write to you with the happiest and the saddest of news. Our beloved Ahma became ill after the Autumn Moon Festival.
Mei Ling’s heart clenched, anticipating the painful news to come.
Despite our care she joined the spirit world. Our hearts are weak with missing her.
Tears filled Mei Ling’s eyes, blocking her vision. Anxious to learn more about her family, she smothered her sorrow by squeezing her lids tight to clear them enough that she could keep reading. She made out the next line through a misty veil.
You can take comfort that the picture of your growing and beautiful family arrived before she departed. That she could see your daughter, the grandchild that she named, gave her great joy.
Our happy news is that while we said goodbye to one family member we will be welcoming another. If all goes well my child will be born in the year of the Ox. I am excited and nervous at the idea of motherhood and so very grateful that I am near Mah-ma. I think of you, so very far away, and wonder at your strength.
Jah Jeh is carrying a child?! Mei Ling hadn’t known she was married. That news must be contained in a letter that had been lost in transit. Though her mind and heart were reeling, Mei Ling didn’t allow herself to stop reading. She pushed on, eager for the news.
We thought the life that you are leading was meant to be mine, but I don’t believe that was ever meant to be. I could not have survived, let alone thrived, as you have. A bold Dragon needed to make that adventure, not a gentle and cautious Rabbit like me.
The note continued with sweet details about Dai Dai, their parents, and Renshu, who must be her husband.
When she finished reading the letter, Mei Ling allowed the swirl of conflicting emotions to overtake her. The paper pressed against her chest while sobs poured out. Tears streamed down her face and sounds she had never heard before escaped her covered mouth. She’d known in her mind that she would never see Ahma again, but her heart railed against the loss—made more outrageous by the fact that it had happened months ago, and Mei Ling had yet to honor Ahma’s spirit.
Jah Jeh was carrying a baby—a child Mei Ling might never meet. It was bittersweet news. Jah Jeh seemed to be living in the village with her husband, Renshu. Mei Ling remembered the shy boy from the village who had admired Jah Jeh from afar when they had come visiting. Jah Jeh had enjoyed the attention but never encouraged him. Now he was her husband. Mei Ling wished she knew more about the man her sister had married. Was he kind like Kai Li? Lost in his own thoughts like Fuchan? Or a different type of man altogether?
The happiest news was that her Jah Jeh had spoken so plainly of forgiveness. Mei Ling was greatly relieved that her sister was at peace, and even grateful, for each of their lives.
Sorrow and relief filled her as she wa
lked to her altar and prayed: for her sister, for her beloved Ahma, and for herself.
Mei Ling thanked Ahma for all that she had given to her, most especially the precious gold coins. One had saved her on Angel Island. The rest helped her to feel secure when she first arrived in San Francisco and was so afraid that Kai Li would abandon them. She’d used one coin to buy the silk the first time she made a wedding gown. Her grandmother’s wisdom, foresight, and generosity had brought security and prosperity to her life.
Mei Ling remembered Ahma’s last words to her: “A wife obeys her husband, yes, but a wise woman earns her own money and saves for the emergencies that a husband cannot see coming. Give him most of your earnings but hold back a portion. A mother protects her children—always.”
Ahma was still safeguarding Mei Ling . . . and by extension Bo, Joy, and Siew. Mei Ling bowed low to the ground and gave honor to her beloved grandmother’s spirit.
Like her grandmother, she would protect her children, always.
When he returned from work Mei Ling told Kai Li the news from her family. She also had an idea to discuss with him. “Husband, I have been thinking about our predicament with Siew and Jack Wong.”
Kai Li agreed, looking a little wary of the topic.
“Can we pay his debt to the tong, so that he won’t seek her out in the future?”
He pulled in his lips and nodded. She was happy he agreed so easily. Then he confused her by shaking his head.
“I considered the same solution,” Kai Li replied. “I asked him what he owes, and it’s more than we live on in one full year.”
Mei Ling’s breath caught. She’d been so hopeful she’d found the solution for their predicament.
Kai Li looked chagrined. “I wish it were possible for me to quickly earn that much money. We can start saving with the hope that we’ll have enough when the time comes.”
Mei Ling’s Dragon roared. Giving Suk Suk a year of income would end their own dreams. All their hard work would go to save Jack Wong rather than buying a house, sending the children to university, or opening their own restaurant. Her Dragon protested at the idea of making a huge sacrifice for Suk Suk’s weak character.
CHAPTER 26
Oakland
February 1925
The loud banging on the door woke her up, but this time she did not rouse her husband. She had expected Suk Suk would come again, and she was ready to protect her family. Quan Yin, guide and safeguard me. The ghost walked with her as she left her sleeping family.
She opened the door just enough for him to see her. Suk Suk’s red-rimmed eyes looked her up and down. Before he could say anything, she whispered to him.
“The others are sleeping,” she cooed in the way that flattered men. “Can we . . . speak? Just you and I? Outside?”
He nodded.
“Let me get dressed more appropriately,” she replied with a seductive smile. She slowly shut the door. Mei Ling exhaled, leaning her head on the painted woodwork. She took in a steadying breath to slow her heart rate. Then she quickly but quietly went into action, getting the supplies she had left in the entry closet—warm clothes, shoes, and a full bottle of whiskey.
When she was ready she walked past him without saying a word. He followed her down the stairs, clumping so loudly she feared he would wake up all those who slept in the building. Suk Suk lurched in a drunken stagger next to her in the foggy night. She steeled herself and then looped her arm through his. He smiled and pulled at her, wanting to stop.
“This is goo—” he started to say.
“Shhh,” Mei Ling replied, putting a finger to his lips. “We need more privacy.”
She tugged his arm, guiding them down Webster Street. They walked five blocks until they came to the estuary. The street turned into a wooden wharf leading to the bridge that Kai Li crossed each day. She led him to the right side of the wharf. Mei Ling’s heart beat hard and fast as she folded her legs underneath her until she sat on the edge of the wharf facing north, the bay straight ahead. She demurely patted the spot next to her. Suk Suk collapsed onto the wood, his feet dangling over the dark water moving below. He leaned, his moist lips puckered.
She ducked her head, held up the bottle of whiskey, and said, “A little more?”
“Ladies first,” he slurred out.
Mei Ling sighed. She unscrewed the cap, put the bottle to her lips, and pretended to drink three large gulps.
“You’re a thirsty one!” he declared with a grin, taking the bottle.
“I am . . . unaccustomed to being in such a situation,” Mei Ling said, hoping the fear in her voice sounded demure.
Jack Wong looked at her, his expression unreadable.
“I’m not a bad man,” he said. “You know that, right?”
Mei Ling nodded, though every fiber of her being wanted to scream at him: What kind of man besides a bad one takes an orphan into bondage?
“I wish I could save her,” Suk Suk slurred out, practically in tears. “But they are bad, bad men.” He leaned in and whispered very loudly, “They will kill me if I don’t deliver.” His head dropped forward, his chin bouncing up and down.
“You understand, don’t you? I’m a good man.” Suk Suk pointed to his chest, emphasizing each word with a thrust of his finger, as if the motion would force goodness inside of him. He waved his finger around and slowly shook his head. “But . . . I have no choice.”
Mei Ling nodded, not defending Siew or arguing back. She simply nodded and kept encouraging Wong to sip from the brown bottle, occasionally bringing the container to her own lips without swallowing. Mei Ling shivered in the night, the damp fog penetrating deep into her bones.
“I’m a good man, but an unlucky one,” Suk Suk continued. “She was the only way to pay my debt.”
He sighed and moaned and drank. Eventually his dark head fell forward and he slumped sideways onto her. Mei Ling wrapped her right arm around the man, holding him like she would comfort a child—Bo, or Joy, or Siew. His head rested against her chest, over her heart.
“I’m not a bad man,” Suk Suk whimpered. “Only a practical one. She is just a girl. An orphan. Of no value.”
Of no value echoed in Mei Ling’s mind. A flash of anger roared through her body.
“Did you bring her to Bartlett Alley?” she asked while she could, though she was terrified of the answer.
Suk Suk slowly turned his face and eyed her sideways. He seemed unable to hold his head upright. He gave one slight nod.
Mei Ling felt ill.
“Did . . .” She swallowed hard. “Did any man touch her?” Mei Ling steeled herself for the answer.
“No!” he declared, managing to wave a finger for emphasis.
She studied his face, looking for deceit, but saw none. Relief and gratitude ran a chill through her whole body. Mei Ling’s worst fear was not true. Siew hadn’t been brutally violated.
“She is a little girl. No. No. No.” Suk Suk shook his head. “We aren’t monsters.”
She stared at him. Disgust in her voice, she whispered, “You can tell yourself that, but that doesn’t make it true. You are a coward and a monster to force Siew to pay for your weakness.”
He closed his eyes and turned his face away. He had the decency to look ashamed, but he seemed oblivious to the danger he was in. He’d entirely underestimated Mei Ling.
Suk Suk brought the bottle to his lips, tipping it back until it pointed to the sky and his head bent all the way back.
“Bah!” He growled at the empty bottle. He tossed it into the estuary. Mei Ling watched it float away, toward the bay.
He draped his arm over her shoulder like he owned her. She tensed but resisted the urge to push it off. His breathing grew heavy. His arm dropped away and his head fell forward.
Still she waited. When she heard soft snores, she gazed around to confirm they were alone. Then she reached behind him and firmly wrapped a hand around each of Suk Suk’s arms and ever so slightly leaned him forward. She studied him for a reaction or
resistance, but there was none. She tipped him farther, his weight pressing at her fingers. She paused at the last possible moment, knowing this was her final chance to change her mind. Her heart beat hard; her hands were moist. Siew’s other mother whispered, You must save Siew.
Mei Ling looked up to heaven and said, “God, forgive me if you can. If you cannot, I won’t regret this choice as I burn in hell . . . or I’m haunted for all of eternity.”
The ghost commanded, Do it!
She tipped Suk Suk farther forward until he fell through her fingers. Her chest exploded.
She heard a loud splash in the estuary and then a feeble cry. “Help. Help me,” Suk Suk’s frantic voice called to her.
“I’m coming,” she spoke to the darkness. “I’ll get you out.”
But she didn’t move. Mei Ling stayed on the edge of the dock, her legs dangling over the side. Her body pounded with emotion while tears poured down her face, and her shoulders shook with each sob.
“Help!” Desperation filled the drowning man’s voice. She imagined the burning in his chest as it filled with water. Compassion welled up in Mei Ling, even though this man had been willing to trade Siew to ensure his own well-being.
“Coming . . . ,” she lied once again, her voice shaking. She pictured the terror on his face, his head bobbing up and down in the salty water.
Coughing, splashing, and help echoed up at her, a little farther away now. The current was carrying Suk Suk toward the bay as he drowned.
“You gave me no choice,” she whispered, though only the ghost could hear her. “You aren’t worthy of Siew’s life, of our family’s future.”
She sat there, listening to the sounds of the drowning man grow faint. It felt like hours, but was probably only minutes, of splashing and coughing interspersed with his desperate pleas. Then no words, just the coughing and finally a loud, powerful silence except the sound of her own jerky breaths.
Mei Ling spoke out loud to the ghost. “It’s done. We do not have to be afraid anymore.”
But neither she nor the ghost believed those words. There might still be an enormous price to be paid for her choice.
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