Jessica bit her lip. All of a sudden, she wished she had led him on a little bit, because she would’ve liked to kiss him once more.
Why, she asked herself, was being in control of her life suddenly such a pain in the ass?
Because, the answer came to her, as if from above: She wasn’t doing what she really wanted to do. Was she?
Before he could say anything else, Jessica leaned forward and kissed him back. She was a good kisser, too, and wanted him to know it.
He pulled away and looked at her in surprise.
She laughed. “That’s to tide you over until I’m done dealing with everything. Because when I am, I’m going to take you up on your offer. Will you wait for me?”
He smiled. “I guess I have to, don’t I?”
54
Why do we need to answer the phone? Isn’t that for the women only?”
Jessica looked across her classroom and shook her head gently at Mr. Nguyen, one of the seven adults crammed into old-fashioned wood desks for her Tuesday/Thursday office skills class. “We’re all going to learn to do everything for ourselves. And until we get our computers, that includes answering phones. Now, where were we?”
“Take a message, or put them in the voice mail,” said Mr. Lopez from the front row. Jessica beamed at him and got a shyly proud smile in return.
The rest of the class went smoothly, with everyone listening very seriously to her every word and some taking notes while Jessica went over phone etiquette, alphabetization, and basic office tasks. Although they didn’t yet have computers, she already had two more students than the week before, when the class had started.
Although it was still light outside, the clock above the chalkboard showed eight. “Okay, everyone. That’s all for tonight. Remember to bring your résumés for next time and we’ll start working on those.”
One of her students, an older woman who’d asked Jessica to call her Belen, walked up to Jessica’s desk with a woman slightly younger than her. “Ms. Luna, this is my sister, Marta,” she said.
“Hi, Marta,” said Jessica. “I’m glad you came out tonight —”
“Ms. Luna,” interrupted Belen, “my sister doesn’t speak much English. I wanted to ask you . . . She doesn’t have a résumé. She’s only been cleaning offices since she came here.”
Jessica felt a small pang in her chest. “Well, that’s okay. Those are still jobs, aren’t they? Tell her to make a list. . . .” Jessica turned to Marta then and told her, in painfully labored Spanish, to bring a list of her work experiences, including those she’d had before coming here.
Marta smiled and thanked her, then rattled off a long, quick sentence that Jessica couldn’t follow. She looked to Belen for help.
“She says thank you for teaching this class. Also, are we going to learn to make blogs?”
Jessica laughed. “Of course. We’ll make blogs, web sites, and everything else.”
As she made her way to ALMA’s lobby, Jessica said good-bye to the students and other instructors who were also there late that Tuesday night. On her way out, she waved to Marisol, who was talking to Esmeralda in her office. She would have plenty of time to talk to Marisol the next day. She was coming back to present the web site’s progress to the board and to cover an afternoon art class for Lupe, and she’d probably end up getting asked to do something completely unrelated as well. Even though she’d been working there officially for only four weeks now, it already felt like much longer. Besides working on the web site and starting up her classes, she’d already chaperoned several field trips, repaired the fax machine, redesigned two brochures, and helped some of the older students with their college essays. Every day at ALMA was turning out to be an adventure.
As she walked out to her car, waving to the kids out playing basketball in the fading light, Jessica couldn’t help looking back at the building wistfully. Sometimes, after a long day there, she didn’t want to leave.
Jessica got into her car and turned the A/C on full blast. As soon as she got all the computers they needed, she decided, she’d go to work on getting ALMA some donated central air.
She turned on her phone. It showed that Sabrina had called. Jessica hesitated for a moment before calling back. She hadn’t talked to her sister at all since their argument, more than a month ago now. But she really did want to talk to her, she realized now as she dialed the number.
“Hello?” It was Sabrina’s husband, David.
“Hey, David. Is Sabrina home?”
“No, she’s out shopping.”
Jessica was half-disappointed, half-relieved. She hadn’t known what she would have said to Sabrina, anyway.
“Did you get my message?” David continued. “I called about an hour ago, but I guess you were in class.”
Jessica frowned. So Sabrina hadn’t even called, after all. “I haven’t listened to voice mail yet, no.”
“Well, I have good news. I talked to Community Relations, and you’re getting your computers. They said they can give ALMA thirty-eight desktops, four old laptops with stations, and twelve printers. We lucked out. They’re upgrading a whole department and were just going to get rid of all that stuff. The laptops are pretty old, though. And the printers probably need toner.”
Jessica hurried to reassure him. “No, no — that’s great. That’s way more than I was hoping for. Gosh, David — thank you so much.”
“No problem. I’m glad to help. They were just going to throw that stuff away. I’m glad to see it getting put to good use, you know? Plus, you know — Halronburco gets to write off the donation, so it makes me look good for suggesting it.”
Jessica laughed. She was glad she’d e-mailed David for help. But now that that part of the conversation was over, she didn’t know what else to say. Apparently, he didn’t, either. Besides the work she’d done for his web site, they’d never really talked much.
“So . . . how’s the Fairlane site holding up?” she asked.
“Good. Really good,” he said. “In fact, I’m glad you brought it up. I’ve been meaning to ask you about doing a site for a friend of mine. If you have time, I mean. You’ll meet him at the barbecue next week.”
Jessica frowned. “You guys are having a barbecue next week? Sabrina hasn’t mentioned it to me. I mean, we haven’t . . . I haven’t had a chance to . . .” She stopped. She wasn’t going to talk about their argument with David. That was between her and her sister.
An awkward pause ensued. Then David cleared his throat and said, “Well, I’m inviting you. It’s next Saturday. I’d really like it if you’d come.”
Jessica didn’t know what to say. It was weird for David to call up and invite her over, out of nowhere. Oh no, she thought. What if he had talked to Jonathan and was trying to get the two of them back together?
“I don’t know. I’ve been pretty busy,” she started to say.
“Jessica,” he interrupted, his voice as mild as always and yet, at the same time, very serious. “Listen . . . I know you and your sister had it out a while back. And I’m not blaming you — believe me, I know how Sabrina can be when she doesn’t get her way. But I also know that she misses you a lot, and she’d really like to see you. Even if she’s too proud to come out and tell you herself.”
Jessica laughed. He really did know her sister. Sabrina could be just like Papi sometimes, refusing to admit when she was wrong. But then again, so could Jessica. In this case, she’d been the one in the wrong, and she was honest enough to admit it to herself. It was time for her to admit it to Sabrina, too.
“Okay. I’ll be there.”
“Great!” She could hear David’s grin in his voice. “Sabrina will be really happy to hear it. Oh, and my parents are driving in, too. They haven’t seen you since . . . when?”
“It’s been a long time,” Jessica supplied. She had seen them only once since Sabrina’s wedding, in fact. Really, it was sweet of him to act like his parents would care. She glanced at the clock on her car’s stereo. She’d been planning to sto
p by the used-book store before going home and see if they had some old keyboarding manuals, so she needed to go ahead and get off the phone. But first she had one thing to make sure of.
“David, Jonathan’s not going to be there, is he?”
“Jonathan?” He paused, as if trying to figure out why she’d ask — or maybe he was pretending not to know, to be polite. “No, no. He’s out of town on business. I didn’t invite him.”
“Okay.” Jessica felt a tinge of guilt. “How’s he doing, anyway?”
“He’s fine. He’s been really busy with his work and that neighborhood thing he’s into.” There was another pause. Then he added meaningfully, “Don’t worry about him, Jessica. He’ll be fine.”
She didn’t know how much David knew about what had happened, but she was starting to realize that he probably knew more about everything than she’d ever given him credit for.
55
Jessica gripped the steering wheel a little firmer than necessary as she headed down the freeway to Sugarland, without even the radio to keep her company. She was nervous about seeing Sabrina. What if she was still angry and hadn’t really wanted Jessica there at all?
The backyard was filled with all the usual suspects, plus David’s parents, who had shown up with piles of Pyrex containers. Jessica recognized them from their sandy blond hair, the mom’s big and the dad’s thinning. Plus, they both had David’s blue eyes.
“I brought meatballs,” David’s mother was saying, “because, you know, they’re David’s favorite.”
Sabrina turned away with a secret eye roll, then saw Jessica standing there, waiting. Her look of annoyance was replaced by surprise, then trepidation, then pleasure, all within the space of two seconds.
“Jessica!” she called, practically running over to give Jessica a hug. Sabrina squeezed her so hard, Jessica almost felt the breath leave her lungs. Just before she suffocated from this violent display of affection, David called her name. Sabrina let her go and walked her over to the patio table where he was standing with his parents.
“I’m so glad you made it,” he said. “You remember my parents. . . .”
“You’re Sabrina’s sister,” said his mother. “So pretty. Here, give me a hug.”
Jessica dutifully hugged her. “Hello, Mrs. Hoffman.”
“Here. David, give her a meatball.” His mother watched until David picked one up with a toothpick and handed it over. He seemed a little embarrassed about it.
Jessica accepted it graciously and immediately took a bite. “Mm. This is really good,” she said, causing David’s mother to beam proudly. In the background, David’s father had already popped open a beer. Jessica had to laugh. Obviously, David’s family wasn’t so different from hers after all.
After everyone was settled with meatballs, rice, beans, and dry hamburgers, Sabrina broke away from her friends. “Jessica, come inside for a second. I want to show you what we’ve done with the bedroom.”
Jessica took a deep breath and followed her sister inside and up the stairs. Here it comes, she told herself. The big talk.
But once they made it to the bedroom, Jessica saw that nothing in it had been changed. Everything was still purple flowers and satin. Sabrina jumped and flopped across her king-size bed, then faced her sister with a grin. “Come on!” She patted the comforter, inviting Jessica to lie beside her. Just like when they were kids. It was as if Sabrina were about to break out the Barbies and candy stash. Unsure of what to expect, Jessica gingerly climbed over the oak footboard.
“So tell me,” Sabrina squealed, “what’s going on with you? We haven’t talked in forever. I’ve missed you.”
The weirdness had gotten to Jessica. She couldn’t act as if everything were normal for any longer. She rolled up into a kneeling position, trying not to sink into the deep feather-top mattress.
“Sabrina, wait.”
“Oh, come on. Don’t start with the secrets again. I won’t say anything stupid, I promise,” Sabrina pleaded, looking starved for gossip. Or for her sister’s confidence.
“No, it’s not that. Sabrina, we have to talk. About the things we said, last time on the phone.”
“Oh, that.” Sabrina’s eyes were far away for a second, as if she were remembering. Then she sat up and looked at Jessica with a rueful smile. “Listen, I’m sorry about that, muñeca. You were right. I was getting way too deep in your business, and I shouldn’t have. Listen, if you don’t like Jonathan, that’s fine. I totally support you. And if you don’t want to tell me what happened, I guess I deserve that. But I hope you aren’t going to stop talking to me just because —”
“No.” Jessica wasn’t going to let her sister run over her with words this time. She was going to say her piece. “Sabrina, listen. I know you were mad, and you had a right to be. Everything you said was true. I have been selfish, and I hadn’t given David or your friends a chance. I was just being . . .” It was hard to say. “I was being a racist jerk. I’m sorry.”
Sabrina waved it all away. “It’s okay. Don’t worry about it.”
“No, seriously. Listen,” Jessica continued. “Mostly, I’m sorry for what I said about you being lazy and not wanting to work. Sabrina, if I’d had any idea why you were staying home all this time —”
“Shh, shh,” said Sabrina. Jessica saw now that her sister’s eyes were glistening, that she was trying to hold back tears. And yet she was still smiling, trying to act as if nothing were wrong. Jessica couldn’t hold it anymore. Her own tears welled up, and one escaped down the side of her face.
“Aw,” said Sabrina. “Jessica . . . come here.” She reached out and hugged her sister again. And that was it. That was all they needed to start bawling like babies.
“I’m sorry, Sabrina,” Jessica sobbed. “I wish I’d known.”
“No, I’m sorry,” Sabrina said, sniffling. “I should have told you before. Plus, like I said, I shouldn’t have been trying so hard to get in your business. I shouldn’t have made you go out with Jonathan.”
Jessica pulled back and sniffled loudly, then wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “You didn’t. I went out with him because I wanted to. And I’m glad I did. He . . . it changed my mind about some things.”
“What? You mean you’re going out with him again?” Sabrina looked surprised as she wiped her own face with the corner of her pillowcase.
“No,” Jessica said. “I’m not going out with him again. I’m just saying — being with him made me realize that I need to judge people on their personalities and not on what they look like or what they do for a living. I mean, in the end his personality didn’t really work with mine, but that doesn’t make it okay for me to hate on people just because they’re white or rich or whatever. You know? I mean, you don’t know this, but I’ve secretly been having these mean thoughts about your friends, just because they’re different from me. I mean, I thought they were different from you, too, but obviously they aren’t. I mean — they’re your friends, so I should have respected that, and taken the time to get to know them. Instead of acting like Papi. So . . . I’m really sorry, and I’m not going to do that anymore.”
Sabrina laughed. “Yeah. Well, actually, it wasn’t that big of a secret. I knew you didn’t like them, and I figured that was why, but I also thought you’d snap out of it, eventually. But, you know, I can’t blame you for thinking that I was trying to set you up with a white guy on purpose. I wasn’t. I was just trying to set you up with someone nice. I didn’t care if he was purple or green.”
Sabrina wiped her face again, then propped the pillows against the ornate headboard. She and Jessica leaned back against them, each lost in her own thoughts for a while. Jessica was glad she’d come to the barbecue. Now that she was here, she realized just how much she’d been missing Sabrina, too.
“Have you talked to Mami?” Sabrina asked after a while.
“No. Not since they went on vacation. Have you?”
“No,” Sabrina said.
“Do you think they’r
e going to be okay?”
“I hope so. I think they will, but who knows.”
“Mami told me that whatever they ended up doing, it’d be for the best.” Jessica hated to say the words aloud but felt she could share that fear with her sister.
“She’s probably right,” said Sabrina. “Either way, there’s nothing we can do now. We just have to let them live their lives.”
Jessica sighed. It wasn’t a comfort, exactly, but at least she didn’t have to worry alone. “So, is all this stress getting to you? What does your doctor say? How’ve you been feeling?”
“Good. Just a little nauseous, sometimes,” Sabrina said idly.
Jessica was confused. “Is that . . . is that something that happens when you’re trying too hard to get pregnant?”
“No, mensa!” Sabrina laughed. “It’s what happens when you are pregnant.” The glint in her eye showed that she’d been waiting to spring the news on Jessica for a while now.
Jessica sat up straight with shock, hitting the back of her head on the wall. “What? You’re pregnant?”
“Yes,” Sabrina said happily. Serenely, almost. “I’m going to have a baby, Jessica.” Her eyes misted up again. Jessica saw now that she was crying with joy. And messed-up hormones, maybe.
She hugged her sister again. “Congratulations.” She didn’t know what else to say. It was so strange, for Sabrina to be pregnant. Scary, in a way. But exciting, too. “How long have you known?”
“Three weeks. Don’t say anything to anybody downstairs,” Sabrina said quickly. “Except David, if you want. But no one else knows yet. I wanted to tell you, first.”
Jessica smiled, feeling her own tears coming on again. “Thanks.” Then the realization hit her fully. “I’m going to be an aunt,” she said softly.
Sabrina laughed and they hugged again.
When they went back downstairs, the guests were leaking into the living room, hiding from the heat. Jessica decided to go out and get a drink from the cooler before they were all gone. At the doorway, it occurred to her that the auntlike thing to do would be to offer her pregnant sister a drink, too.
Houston, We Have a Problema Page 29