by Paige Elwood
― William Blake, Songs of Innocence and Songs of Experience
Sarah displayed the William Blake quote on the final slide of her presentation and glanced around the lecture hall. Loud applause erupted from the students. She supposed it could be because it was the final lecture of the year, but she liked to think that the applause was also for the lesson.
They had all been enraptured throughout the whole of her lecture on William Blake’s poetry. As they began to file out, she wished them all a great summer and set about gathering up her notes and putting them into her purse, ready to meet her friends for lunch.
From the corner of her eye, she spotted three of her female students approaching the lecturer podium. She looked up and greeted them. “Can I help you ladies?” She asked, smiling. These were three of her best students: Casey, Riley, and Abigail. She would miss teaching them next year.
The girls glanced at each other. Casey, who had taken a front and center position, fidgeted slightly. Sarah gave them an encouraging smile. “Surely I’m not that terrifying?”
Casey smiled nervously. “Was there something you wanted to ask me?” Sarah asked, and the girls giggled.
“There was something,” Casey said.
“Go ahead,” Sarah smiled encouragingly.
“Well, we were just wondering…” Casey began, “… about your dating.”
“What?” Sarah asked.
Riley took the lead at Casey's floundering expression. “Well we just think, you know, you're not so old like some of the other professors, but you don't really go on dates and you’re actually quite hot.” Her eyes flicked over Sarah’s body, toned from running and yoga.
Sarah felt her cheeks flame. “Thanks,” she said, completely blindsided by this direct discussion. “But I do go on dates, girls.” She scrunched her nose up, trying to think where they had got the impression that she didn’t. “What makes you think I don't?”
Riley fidgeted nervously. “Well, you know… it’s just what people say.”
Sarah's eyebrows shot up. Were people, her students, really discussing her dating life? Surely that was none of their business?
“My brother studied here with you,” Casey continued.
Mason, Sarah thought, remembering Casey mentioning this briefly before. It was true that she hadn't really done a great deal of dating at college. At least, not compared to most of her friends.
“Well, you know, I did date in college, but I was also putting in a lot of work. It’s important to put the effort in at college to get where you want to be.”
“When was the last time you went on a date?” Casey asked.
Sarah scrunched her nose. When was it? “About three weeks ago. With a very nice accountant.”
Casey paused before asking, “And did you go on a second date?”
“No,"
“Why not?” Abigail asked.
Sarah didn't really see why she needed to answer all of these questions, but she might as well put these rumors to bed. She didn’t want all her students thinking she was some kind of anti-dating freak. “He just wasn't right,” she said.
“What was wrong with him?” asked Riley.
“He wore unflattering shoes.”
The girls giggled. “And the last date before that? Did you have a second date?” Abigail asked.
“No.”
“Why not?” Casey said.
Sarah wracked her brain, trying to recall who the date previous had been with. “Oh, with a football player,” she said. “He was just a little bad mannered.”
“Bad mannered?” Casey asked.
“He didn't hold the door open for the woman behind us as we entered the restaurant. It seemed a little rude,” Sarah said.
“Don't you think those are kind of superficial, tiny, unnecessary reasons to not go on another date?” Abigail said.
Sarah folded her arms across her chest. “I don't think there's anything wrong with expecting a little more from a romantic partner than looking pretty and making out. If I am going to spend time with them surely they should be someone I am completely comfortable and satisfied with?”
“Well, yes… but don't you think you're a little picky?” Riley said.
Maybe, Sarah thought, but I don't see any need to change that. She smiled at the girls to show she wasn't completely offended. “Have you ever thought that maybe it’s your approach to dating that’s wrong and not mine?”
Now it was the girls’ turn to blush. They shook their heads.
“Look, I’m happy with the way my romantic life is going,” Sarah said, “So while I totally appreciate your concern, I think I’m doing okay.” She looked at each of the girls, whose cheeks were now scarlet. “Now I do promise that I will try to be a little less picky next time I am on a date.”
The girls breathed out, visibly relieved that she hadn't taken offense at their intervention. “Have a great summer, Miss,” Casey said.
“Have a great summer,” Riley and Abigail echoed as they hurried to leave the lecture theater.
“You too, ladies,” Sarah called after them.
She shook her head as they sashayed out. She wasn’t sure if she should be touched or annoyed at their ‘intervention’. She was glad they chose the final lecture to approach her — she wasn’t sure how she’d have handled that one early in the year!
Sarah carried on putting her notes in her purse, hurriedly. Just as she had finished packing up and had almost shaken off the mortification of the impromptu intervention, her phone pinged with an email. She glanced down to see that it was from the Department Head.
She'd finished for the day and was due to meet her friends, but she thought she'd better see what he wanted. She clicked on the email to see that he was requesting she come to his office as soon as she got the email.
Sarah's heart started to hammer in her chest and she tried to calm herself down with deep breaths. Don't worry, she said to herself, this is probably just something silly. She couldn't help worrying that it might be to tell her that they had canceled her trip.
University budgets were always tight, and all the departments were constantly vying for a percentage of the meager budget. Sarah's trip to Prague had been approved, but until she was on the plane, she couldn't be a hundred percent confident that it wouldn't be pulled.
She grabbed her purse and made her way across the campus to his office. This was so inconvenient — she was due to have lunch with her friends this afternoon and they would all be waiting for her right now, but she could not ignore this message. She entered the office, closing the door behind her.
She could see most of the campus through the large window behind Derek.
“Sarah,” Derek greeted her enthusiastically as she entered. He didn't look angry or disappointed, so that at least boded well.
“Take a seat.” He gestured towards the seat on the other side of his desk.
Sarah sat, her hands cradled in her lap. She gazed pointedly forward, waiting for Derek to begin speaking. He slid a piece of paper across the desk. Sarah looked down nervously; it was a confirmed hotel booking for her upcoming trip. She had to stop herself squealing in delight. It was a confirmation for the amazing hotel that she'd requested but hadn’t thought the university budget would stretch to.
“That’s amazing!” she said to Derek. “How did you manage it?”
“I had to pull a couple of strings,” he said. “It pushed the budget to the limit, but we managed to find room for it.”
He looked at Sarah seriously. “It does mean that you are going to have to complete some stellar work in Prague, so that this doesn't look like an unjustified expense.”
Sarah nodded. “Of course. I wouldn't do anything other than my best work regardless of where I was staying.”
Derek smiled. “I know that. I just need to make it very clear that there is no room for anything other than that.”
“Of course.”
“Keep hold of that,” Derek said, nodding at the paper. “You’ll need it fo
r checking in.”
Sarah grabbed it. “Was there anything else?” she asked.
“No,” he said. “Just enjoy your trip!”
“Thank you so much!” Sarah said. “I’ll be sure to send regular reports.”
Sarah left Derek's office in a state of absolute glee. On checking her watch, she found she was already 10 minutes late to meet her friends. She sent a quick text message to the group WhatsApp, letting them know she was running a little late.
She had a reply within seconds: Must be serious if you’re running late! Melody teased.
Sarah rolled her eyes. The whole Little Miss Perfect label was getting tired, and she wasn't perfect by any stretch of the imagination.
Chapter 4
When she finally reached The Dream Bean, her favorite coffee shop in town, her friends Melody, Amanda, and Louise were already there chatting among themselves. They’d left a spare chair for Sarah, and her favorite mocha with soy milk was waiting for her in one of The Dream Bean’s signature dark blue mugs. They did the most amazing mocha here — it was absolutely to die for. Her mouth was already watering at the sight of it.
Melody was updating them on her new job. She’d just been promoted to a senior accountant at her firm. “My boss is so creepy, he stands way too close to me any time he talks to me. But I feel like I don't want to say anything, because I’m trying to build a career there, you know,” she was saying as Sarah walked up and sat down in the vacant chair.
Sarah gasped. “You shouldn't let him make you feel that way.”
“I know, but it’s easy to preach when it’s not happening to you. I need this job,” Melody said. “Not all of us have managed to climb the career ladder as quickly as you.”
Sarah took a breath, slightly offended at Melody’s tone, but brushed it off quickly. “I know, but you can’t put up with that,” she said gently, reaching across the table and squeezing Melody’s hand. “I do think I would walk out if Derek treated me that way.”
“Hopefully you'll never have to find out," Melody said. “I’m thinking of speaking to HR next week. I just hope they don’t think I’m overreacting.”
“I’m sure they won’t,” Amanda said. They all nodded, and Sarah took her first sip of her mocha. The chocolatey flavor burst across her tongue and she closed her eyes for a moment. Heaven.
“How’s your new job, Amanda?” Sarah asked the bubbly blonde, setting her mug back down on the rustic pine table.
“Awesome,” she said, placing her latte on the table. “I absolutely love it.”
Sarah could definitely imagine Amanda enjoying her retail management job. She was so outgoing and polite it would be easy for customers to warm to her. “It is hard on my feet standing up most of the day,” she said, pointedly rubbing at her heels.
Melody nodded. “I worked in a few stores at college and it is definitely not for the fainthearted. I was always standing, and it was brutal on my feet!”
Sarah agreed, having done a fair few shifts at Dunkin Donuts in her college years. At least now she had the choice of sitting down in lectures if she wanted, and they were only an hour or so long.
“So, Sarah, are we having a going away party for you?” Melody asked, her baby blue eyes wide with hope.
Melody was the most social person Sarah knew. She was always out, and she cultivated several circles of friends. Sarah loved her friends, but she was always so busy that she kept her circle small.
“I don't think that's necessary,” Sarah said. “I’ll only be gone for a couple of months, and besides, I'll speak to you all every week on Skype.”
“Look at you, embracing some modern technology,” Melody said. “You’ll be buying a dishwasher next.”
“Hey! I use technology all the time. How do you think I do my lectures? Acetate and an overhead projector?”
They all sniggered. “I was thinking more slate and chalk,” Melody said.
Sarah threw a balled-up napkin half-heartedly across the table at her. “Yeah, yeah, very funny.”
She was used to this kind of teasing from her friends, but she found it difficult to see why they found teasing her such an amusing pastime. Moving swiftly on, she changed the topic to another favorite among her friends. Their boyfriends.
“How’s Christopher, Louise?” She asked the petite brunette who had been sipping quietly at her latte for the whole of the conversation so far. Louise could wax lyrical about how amazing her boyfriend was for hours. This time, Sarah immediately regretted asking as Louise’s eyes widened. She looked down at her coffee and took a sip before she replied.
“We broke up,” she said, sniffling slightly.
A collective supportive noise arose from the girls. Melody, who was closest to her, gave her a quick hug.
“What happened? I thought he was perfect?” Amanda asked.
“So did I!” she said. “I thought we were perfect together, but apparently he didn't agree.” She glanced down, staring intently into her latte as though it might hold the answer to all her relationship problems.
“What did he say?” asked Amanda. “How did he break it off?”
“I broke it off, and I haven't spoken to him since I saw him in the nightclub with another girl,” Louise said through gritted teeth.
A collective gasp rang out.
“Are you sure he was up to no good?” Melody asked.
“They were kissing.”
“Oh my gosh! I am so sorry.” Melody gave her another hug.
“Yeah me too,” Louise said, muffled slightly by Melody’s shoulder as they hugged. She pulled away, taking a sip of her latte before continuing. “Actually, I am thinking of maybe forgiving him… I mean we are young and people make mistakes.”
Sarah's hand flew to her mouth. “No, Louise! Don't do that!”
Louise’s eyes narrowed. “No offense, Sarah, but I don't think you’re the person to be giving advice on long-term relationships. Seeing as you’ve never actually had one.”
“Harsh,” Sarah said. “I’m just looking out for you. Don't you want the best for yourself?” She held Louise’s hostile gaze. “I want the best for you. You’re my friend, and I love you, and I don't think any man who treats you like that can possibly love you. I don't think he deserves a second chance.”
“Sometimes real life doesn't fit with your lofty ideals,” Louise said with a sneer.
Amanda intervened quickly before it got too heated. “Hey, you’re having a crappy time right now, so we just want to help. Getting snippy with Sarah isn't the answer. She's hardly going to say, ‘yes go back to him’ is she?” She smiled at Sarah. “It’s no secret how she feels about romantic relationships.”
“I know. I’m sorry Sarah,” she said, her eyes shining.
“Don't apologize,” Sarah said. “I can’t imagine how you're feeling. Literally, I can't imagine. I’ve never had a relationship last longer than a few weeks. And even that was a long time ago.”
“Thank you,” Louise said. “It would be awful if you’d have gone on your trip and we weren’t on good terms.”
“I would never let that happen, and I didn't take it personally, don't worry.” She gave Louise a hug.
“Let’s talk about something else,” Louise said. “Are you excited for your trip?”
Amanda clapped her hands. “I bet it’s going to be amazing. Imagine, spending all summer in Prague!”
“I am pretty excited,” Sarah said. “In fact, the reason I was late here was because Derek called me to his office to confirm my hotel booking.” She pulled out her phone and searched for the hotel’s website. When it loaded, she handed it around the table. “That’s my hotel,” she said.
“This looks amazing!” Melody said, peering at the images of the grand hotel. It had originally been a medieval church, and the building retained most of the original, gothic features.
“I’m so jealous,” Amanda sighed when the phone was passed to her. “You get to visit The Golden City. Can’t I come along as your assistant or something?
”
Sarah laughed. “If you knew how much trouble we had getting budgets agreed for just me you’d know how hilarious that suggestion is!”
“Worth a try.” Amanda shrugged. “Anyway, I’m amazed you find anything hilarious.” Sarah stuck her tongue out at her.
“What’s your actual job while you’re there?” Melody asked. “I know you’re doing research, but why Prague?”
“We’re cataloguing some newly discovered literature,” Sarah said. “The research center funding the project just happens to be in Prague.”
“Maybe you’ll meet a handsome European man who will be special enough for you to give a fling a try?” Louise said.
Sarah shook her head. She knew they weren’t really serious, but it pushed all her buttons every time. “I’m never going to compromise on that,” she said.
“You don’t know what you’re missing,” Amanda persisted.
“But I know what I’m not missing. My integrity, my self-respect.” The familiar response tripped off her tongue.
“Your virginity!” the girls chorused together.
Sarah balled another napkin and threw it at them playfully. “That’s not what I was going to say.”
“We know, but it’s funny to tease you,” Claire grinned. The rest of her friends sniggered.
Sarah shrugged. “If you want to settle, that’s fine. I just refuse to settle for less than perfect. And the time that I’m not wasting on frivolous dates, I can use to build my career.” She took another sip of her mocha. It was cold now, but still delicious. “Don’t tease me today, I had the most embarrassing conversation with some of my students earlier. They seemed to think I needed some kind of intervention on my lack of dating!”
“Awkward!” exclaimed Amanda.
“Very,” Sarah agreed, “so let’s not tease me today about dating.”
“Only if you agree to send us regular updates about your Prague adventures,” Louise said.
“Deal.” Sarah drained the last of her mocha.
The sun was starting to set when she left the coffee shop, casting a warm pink glow across the sky. The air was warm and sweet as she waved goodbye to her friends and promised to meet for lunch before she left.