by T A Ford
“Do you like it?” She posed for him in her lace bra and panty set that looked like something out of seductress magazine. “It’s Fenty. By Rhianna. I ordered a bunch of it because I like her music,” she grinned. “Turns out she makes pretty panties too.”
He shook his head. “I know we kissed, and it was wrong. I’m sorry for that. I didn’t mean for it to lead too... I’m your doctor so—”
“I looked in your face. You liked it. You like me.” She unzipped her boots and kicked them off. He didn’t move. She reached behind her and unfastened her bra. She moved it so fast she was pulling down her thong panty before he was able to remind himself to breathe. Cue turned to leave, but she caught his hand and forced him to remain. He stood there in complete awe of what was before him, trapped. “I’m fine Doc. I want this. Really bad.”
“You’re confusing friendship with something else,” he reasoned.
“Maybe. I still want it. I always get what I want,” she said.
She touched his groin. Cue wished he had stronger willpower. His zipper went down and she was touching him just as the first kiss had promised. Maybe he was psychic. Maybe the dream was prophetic and he just had to go with it? Funny the things that went through a grown man’s head to justify the unjustifiable.
“Damn it, Dina, you’re going too far.”
“I know,” she said, but there was empathy in her voice, not regret. “Too late for you. Too late for me. Take your shirt off.”
He did. She ran her hands over his pecs, then swiped her tongue up the center of his breastbone. He exhaled loudly. There was no label to put to the emotion her lips stirred in him. All reason went out the window. He scooped his flower up and sat her on the kitchen counter with such sudden force she giggled in response. He yanked his jeans down and pulled her closer to the edge of the counter, lifting her leg over his shoulder. She braced for him with the upward shift of her bottom and tilt of her pelvis just as he went in.
Nothing in his life felt sweeter. Cue thrust into her. A smile of faint amusement eased over Dina’s lips. She gasped. And felt himself melt inside. She arched her back and dropped her head as pleasure rolled them both. In doing so her breasts lifted and he sucked one nipple then the next while thrusting and pumping his adoration in and out of her. It wasn’t enough.
He stopped mid-stroke. He lifted her off the counter and placed her on her feet. He turned her and bent her over the sink, continuing his rapid hip action and dick pumps. Dina laughed and worked the softest ass and sex he’d ever delighted in. He carried her to his bedroom and slammed the door shut to keep Jack out. Dina slipped from his arms. She turned and hurried to his bed. He smiled when he saw her stand on the mattress as if ready to wrestle. Then she surprised him by taking jump up and down on the mattress. Her petite frame going high enough for her to touch the ceiling.
“You still think there is no such thing as sex for the crazy Doc?” she asked.
“Don’t say that,” he said.
“Or what Dickety-Doc?” she teased while jumping. Her breasts bounced each time she lifted in a jump from the bed. “What will you do to me? Dickety-Tickety-Tic-Toc-Doc? Huh?” He had no idea that the springs in his mattress made the bed so bouncy. She grinned. She removed the headband to free her hair. Thick dark hair sprung loose, wild and free. It flounced all over her face. She shook her head and let it all free, then did jumping jacks, her body beautifully splayed for him mid-air. It was the strangest yet most erotic seduction he’d ever experienced.
“Come here,” he said. He grabbed her ankle while she was in flight. Dina squealed and landed flat on her back. Cue dropped on her. He pinned her hands above her head, holding them there by her wrists. She bucked and growled at him playfully.
“That’s enough,” he said calmly.
Laughing with hair covering her face, she moved sexily beneath him.
“Enough,” he said.
“Okay,” she gave him a pout. “But this better be good Doc. You get once chance to prove it to me. You know I’ve never been with a white man before. A doctor either.”
Cue stared at her for a moment, then shook his head. “You are too damn dangerous.”
“I’m not. I’m not dangerous at all. I’m just Dina,” she said, and lifted her head to reach his lips. He kissed her. She was soft everywhere he felt her. Soft and warm. Even her kiss carried the warmth that radiated from inside of her. What am I’m doing? he thought to himself as he dragged his tongue south to her neck. He rained kisses upon her collarbone, then her nipples, where he rolled his tongue. He went further. Dina was more anxious than him. She pushed his head down, wanting him between her thighs. Her boldness blew his mind. After his first tasting of her, she said his name over and over while rolling her hips in a circular motion and teasing his senses.
“Yummy,” she purred.
He slipped his tongue into her and felt the vibrations of her thrill through her tightly locked thighs compressing the sides of his face. Cue held her hips as his tongue boxed with her clit and then switched to licks and kisses of her sex. He found himself grabbing his erection and stroking it while he loved her vagina. And when it became too much, he was on her again, and inside of her again. Dina wrapped her legs high around his waist and grabbed his face to kiss him while moving in and out of her.
“Come inside of me,” she breathed. “I’m on the pill. I can’t get pregnant.”
He wanted the privilege. Pleasure zipped through his cock from the base to the tip. He moved with increasing speed and she seemed to enjoy the pacing. Cue let go of his inhibitions and loved every inch of her.
DINA LAY ON HIS CHEST. Cue stared up at the ceiling. They lay in silence that way for a long time. He eventually found his voice to speak. “Dina, can we talk?”
“Don’t say anything against what we did. I wanted it Doc. There is nothing wrong with love.”
“Love?”
“I’m in love with you,” she said. “You proved it. I can be in love with a white man who is a doctor.”
Cue put his hand to his eyes and winced at her proclamation. She looked up at him. She moved his hand from his eyes. “I know my feelings. More than most people. I’m honest. I’m in love with you. Love is a pure emotion like sex. I loved the sex. I love you.” She touched his hair and then his face. He moved her hair from her face so he could see her without it hanging in her eyes.
“It grows long in the front. Even if I cut it. So I keep it from my face with my headbands,” she explained.
“I prefer it like this,” he said.
“You do? Why?”
“I don’t know,” he said. “It’s all you I suppose.”
“You’re silly,” she said.
“Why don’t you sing more?” he asked, trying to change the subject.
“Huh?”
“Today, when you sang at the bar. I just didn’t know so much soul could come from you.”
“You know I’m a performer,” she said in a matter of fact manner.
“Yes,” he chuckled. “But you’re a far better singer than dancer.”
“Not true. Matteo says I’m one of his best students. And my throat gets itchy when I sing,” she said. She sent her hand down his chest to his groin.
“Uhm, Dina, no,” he said, removing it. He kissed her hand and raised it to his chest. “I’m serious. I really do think your singing is better.”
“You’re wrong,” she said. He didn’t know what to say to convince her. Hell, he wanted to ask her to sing for him again. How could she not know how bad her dancing was? It boggled his mind. And then she lifted her face and her seriousness turned into a sly smile.
“Gotcha!” she said. Cue laughed and tickled her in retaliation. Dina squealed. “I know that my dancing isn’t exactly expert level. I love learning how to dance. Matteo is such a good teacher.”
“Is he?” Cue asked before an eye roll.
“Yes! You saw him.” She put her head back down. “I want to be a triple threat. Like Beyoncé. Not as famous as her, but as talented a
s her. You know how a person can dance, sing, and act. Once I get dancing down, I’m taking acting classes.”
“I thought audiences give you anxiety?”
“They do. But when I’m on stage I don’t see anyone. When I sang my song I sang it to you. I want to do voiceover acting, like for video games and cartoons. No audience there. When I was singing, I kept my eyes closed through most of it. Then I opened them and looked at you. If you weren’t there, I would have never gone in a place like that.”
“You’re braver than you think,” he said.
She smiled and turned over to her side to stare at him. She eased her hand down his pelvis to his flaccid cock again and stroked him. “How long before we can go again?”
“An hour, maybe two?”
“Really? That long?” she looked up at him.
“I’m not Superman,” he said.
“Yes you are,” she chuckled. “You’re Super Doctor.”
He closed his eyes, her hand on his dick soothing him. And before he knew it, he was again rising to the challenge. Dina turned to her side and Cue threw his leg over her hip while he guided his erection back inside of her. He looked down at her. He moved her hair to see her face. Her eyes were pinched closed. Her brow was furrowed in concentration as her lips parted in a silent gasp of ecstasy. He kept moving in and out of her. He needed to go faster. It was like she knew what he wanted. She reached back and grabbed his buttock, forcing him to drill her. Cue kissed the side of her face and turned to his back, pulling her with him. She was now lying flat on his chest with his cock reaching up into her. He worked his pelvis and rubbed her sex button while fucking her the straight-as-an-arrow way. Dina kept gasping in pleasure. One hand squeezed her breast as the other gripped his hand to stop him from pinching her clit. When she was on the brink of a climatic explosion, she forced herself to sit up. She rode him in reverse cowgirl fashion. Her buttocks bounced up and down on his pelvis. He was transfixed on the live image of their union. His lungs and entire body constricted as she rode him harder and faster. Cue could hear himself beg for strength, but she showed no mercy. His eyes rolled in his head as his body crashed and he let go the deepest pleasure through her. She slowed down a measure and then looked back at him.
“That was good. Wasn’t it?”
He couldn’t speak. He was too weak to say a single word. She pulled herself off of him and went to his bathroom. She came back with a rag and cleaned him. Then he drifted to the sound of her taking a shower in his bathroom.
CUE WOKE TO THE SOUND of the television. Confused, he lifted his head. He never slept with the television on. Then the memory crashed back down on him. Suddenly he remembered everything.
“Hi!” she said.
He glanced over to his right. Dina sat up with pillows behind her. She was scribbling on one of his notepads.
“What time is it?” he groaned.
“It’s about four in the morning. You okay?”
“Are you?” he asked.
“Would you stop asking me that?” she chuckled. “I’m fine.”
Cue grabbed a pillow and propped it behind his head. “What are you writing?”
“My list,” she said.
“List? What list?”
“Almost done,” she smiled, and kept scribbling. He ran his hand down her thigh. He had to have slept four hours at the most. One look at her and he wanted more.
“Here you go,” she said.
Cue sat up against his headboard. He reached over to the nightstand and plucked his reading glasses from it. The television didn’t give enough light for the room. He stared down at the list. There were names. Men’s names. And she had fifteen.
“Who are these men?”
“My sexual partners.”
“What?” he glanced over to her.
She nodded. “From latest to the earliest. Number fifteen took my virginity when I was fifteen. Isn’t that weird. Fifteen, fifteen,” she chuckled. “We did it on the school bus. In the back of it.”
“I don’t... wait... on the school bus?” he asked.
She nodded.
“Yes.”
“Why the bus?”
“I had to ride it home because my mother wasn’t allowed to drive with her illness. Whenever we rode the bus Tariq, that was his name, he sat next to me to the back. I hated sitting with the kids. He was nice to me. All he ever wanted do was touch me. So, I let him.”
“How did this happen without any adults catching you? It’s criminal.”
“We stayed hidden to the back of the bus after the last stop. The driver was Mr. Clancy, he could barely see with his thick glasses. When the bus parked and he got out we were alone. Tariq made me pull down my pants and lay down. And then he did it.”
“That’s rape.”
“No. It was consensual,” she insisted.
“Dina, you don’t understand. You were only fifteen.”
“So was he,” she reasoned.
Cue felt anger rise in him at her inability to understand how vulnerable she was in the situation. How could he explain it? He knew the story may seem normal to her, but that kid took advantage of her.
“Tariq was nicer to me than most kids. He even made sure I got home afterwards. His friend picked us up, they took me to the gas station and he bought me a blueberry slurpee and then took me home.”
“Where was your brother?”
“Harvard. I stayed with Mama. She didn’t notice.”
“And this guy on the list with the star next to his name. Who is he?”
She leaned over and looked at the list. “Freddie. He’s my cousin.”
Cue frowned. “Relative?”
“Play cousin. His mom and my mom were friends. After Mama had to go into the hospital and Rodney had to go back to Harvard, I stayed with Aunt Natalie for a while. Freddie was older. In his twenties. He was a graduate student at Morehouse. He had a thing for me. I could tell by the way he stared at me when I wore shorts. He always complained that I should put on more clothes, but would stare at me when I didn’t.”
“Did he force himself on you?”
“Stop saying that.”
“I’m trying to understand, Dina.”
“Understand what? That a man would want me?” she asked.
“No.”
“I did it. Okay? I waited until auntie was gone. I came into his room when he was in there and just took off my shorts. He was playing a video game. A grown man playing video games.” She shook her head with distaste. “He took one look at me, and then he did what I knew he would do. Well, he was doing it to me for a long time after. Then he got upset. Said my brother would kill him. He moved out. Aunt Natalie sensed I had done something wrong. She called my brother and told him to come get me or she’d put me on the streets.”
“How old were you?”
“Eighteen. Rodney was almost done with school. I got accepted into Georgia State. He got me an apartment near the campus. And I had a job at the local bookstore. Things were good for a time. I even pledged a sorority and made some friends. I still have them. I think.”
“This man here. The last man you slept with?” Cue asked, fascinated by her stories.
“Oh,” she smiled. “That’s Dillon. My old neighbor. Well, at my last place. He used to make stupid excuses to come to my townhouse. Borrow eggs, and butter. Stuff like that. He invited me over to watch some MMA fight a year ago. I said yes. When I was there he kept trying to give me massages to my feet and shoulders. When I didn’t say no he was pulling down my pants. He was a good lover. Like you,” she smiled. “He liked the oral. He was black though. They are all black.”
“Thanks, I guess.”
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
“Does your brother know about this list?”
“Rodney? No! He thinks I’m a virgin. He’s asked me a few times and I always deny that anything has ever happened. When I try to date a guy he chases them away. No. He doesn’t know.”
Cue stared at the list. He wanted
to know the story behind every man on it. But his pride wouldn’t let him ask. He felt like hunting them down and putting a knife in the chest of each of them.
“Your turn.”
“My what?”
“Make a list. I want to know all your sexual partners. How many you’ve had. Oh, and I used protection with every one of them. You’re the only man I ever did it with, without protection. I accepted your germs inside of me because you’re a doctor. So, you must be clean.”
Cue laughed. “I can’t make a list of names. I can give you a number, and that’s a guess.”
“Really? You forgot all their names?”
“Some of them. Last I counted I’ve had about 27 or 30 different women.”
“Wow! That’s a lot Doc. It’s double my number.”
“Not compared to Wilt Chamberlin.”
“Who?”
“Never mind.”
“How many of them did you love?” she asked.
“One and a possible,” he replied.
“I’ve never been in love. Except for now. Sex was nice. Pleasant. And I like to do things but it didn’t make me feel love.”
Cue set the notepad aside. “Come here.”
She scooted down into his arms. “I’m flattered to make your list.”
“You’re welcome,” she said and snuggled closer to him.
“I think we should try to go slow. From here on out,” he began.
“You do?”
“Yes.”
“Why?” she asked.
“Because you’re healing, Dina. And sex is complicated. It makes things between us complicated.”
Dina looked up at him. “I have Asperger’s. I may have social anxiety, and a personality disorder. I may even be becoming my mother. But I’m not stupid Doc. Sex is a very human and natural expression of pleasure and love between two people. It’s what we want it to be. And with you it feels closer to love. I don’t want that to end.”
He sighed in agreement.
“Good. And neither do you,” she said. She closed her eyes and rested in his arms. He closed his eyes too. There was no way to un-ring the bell. He’d crossed the line. The best he could hope for was that she healed and these feelings she had for him would survive the test. Because he’d already slipped and fallen in love.