by T A Ford
“So I was right. The bastard.”
Cue felt weak standing, but knew better than to bend or sit. He’d vomit. The damage done to Dina the past few weeks could be irreversible. But he didn’t share that. He had to summon the courage to defeat his own demons if he had any hope of pulling this off.
“Okay. I’ll do it. But you can’t go in there looking the way you do,” she looked around at his place. “Do you need help cleaning this up?”
“I’ll take care of it. She won’t see me like this.”
“Thank you.” Maura started for the door and paused. “If you are really going through with this for her, then I can accept the fact that I was wrong about you. I did do you both harm. I owe you an apology. You’d be the only person in her life right now to love her this much. Rodney has gone silent on me. He signed her care over to this doctor the same way he did his mother. And I threw away a very important relationship with a man who loved me for Rodney. Again. I don’t know what to do about any of it.”
After she left, Cue went straight to the bathroom and spewed whatever was left in the bottom of his stomach. He went to the sink and put water on his face. He had to act, and he had to act quick.
DINA PREFERRED TO SIT next to the window. She could feel the sun on her face. For the past month she hadn’t been allowed out of her room. She was to spend time writing her daily thoughts in a tablet. The problem was she didn’t have many thoughts. Not anymore. She had no books. She had no sticky notes. She didn’t even have a television to watch. Just the sun and the moon to visit. Most days she cried over her losses. No matter what medication they gave her, they couldn’t take away her tears. Each time she tried to remember why she was there, where her Doc was, she could barely summon the information in orderly fashion. Some days it was only a few hours since she and Doc last spoke. Other days it felt like years. Of course, she knew what she had done to herself, she just didn’t understand her punishment.
Dr. Robinson told Dina it was best this way. He was now the only person she could trust. She was crazy. And crazy people like her mother always ended up here. Numb to her life sentence, she didn’t fight the injustice anymore, she didn’t lash out at the doctors or try to escape her room. She sat by the window and watched the sky.
“I’M DR. WALSH, I’M taking patient Dina Erickson today,” he said and handed over the paperwork and his identification.
“Hi, Dr. Walsh. I see the transfer in the system. Were you pre-scheduled for a consult with Dr. Mallard today?” the young woman at the counter asked.
“No, Dr. Singh brought me in to be the resident for Robinson. I need to have some tests done. I’ll be moving her to Emory Hospital. The paperwork should be in order. Her name is Dina Erickson.”
“One moment,” the woman typed in her computer and then pulled up the patient record. “Oh, yes, I see you did consult on her case before she was admitted. But she is still under Epstein. I’m sorry, sometimes paperwork isn’t submitted correctly. I don’t see you listed as the current physician or any approvals from Director Singh.”
“Get him on the phone to verify,” Cue said.
“Ah, don’t you know? Director Singh and Dr. Robinson are at the APA convention in—”
“That’s right, I forgot,” Cue said. He gave her a sly smile. “Wish I could vacation. Long days and nights are draining me.”
She looked up at him from under her lashes and gave him a smile as well. He still had enough charm left in him to elicit a response. “Me too. Jamaica is where I’d rather be.”
“I could see you on a beach, green, black and gold bikini,” he said.
“How did you know I was from Jamaica?” she smiled.
“I majored in Caribbean beauties before I got my degree in psychology,” he replied.
She laughed. She shook her head, smiling. “Well everything else is in order. I don’t see why we can’t push this through.”
“Thanks, beautiful, I got a lot of work ahead of me today.” Cue continued to lean in on the counter. Epstein was the key to getting his plan going. He knew Epstein was too lazy to check into what Robinson’s trial study was doing to the patients he prescribed medication to. He also knew Robinson had never told Epstein about his connection to Dina. When he contacted him to agree to the transfer, he gave him them documents. Cue forged Singh’s signature to get him on board. He also learned that Singh and Robinson were out of the country. The time was short for him to make his move before the doctors returned. It had only been sixteen hours since he met with Maura. He moved in a state of near delirium, barely sober. But he played the role masterfully. The nurse printed out the paperwork for him to sign, which he did. Then she handed over a clipboard for him with her release paperwork.
“Where is she?” he asked.
“Room 2203. She has lunch delivered around this time. We have her under suicide watch. She is checked on every thirty minutes.”
“Suicide watch? For how long?”
“Since she was admitted,” the nurse said. The tremors in Cue’s hands were the only thing he couldn’t conceal. He did his best to not let his anger show on his face. “I know Dr. Allen is on duty. I’ll meet with him. Thanks.”
“Yes, doctor.”
He walked to the elevator flipping through the pages. Robinson had put his beloved into his trial study for schizophrenic patients, citing her mother’s struggle with the disease. Maura was right. He was poisoning her with anti-psychotic drugs and studying her like a lab rat. She had suffered seizures, body temperature dysregulation problems, and cerebral effects that had tampered with her memory.
“Motherfucker,” Cue said. He picked up a doctor’s lab coat and put it on. Lucky for him, it fit. He placed his badge on the lapel to keep anyone from being suspicious and making him explain his intentions again. Once he arrived on her hall, he found three male nurses on patrols, checking rooms and delivering food. One looked at him a bit suspicious but saw his badge and didn’t question him. He nodded and opened Dina’s door.
It was lunch time. Dina could always tell by where the sun had moved to in the sky outside of her window. She didn’t bother to look back when her door opened. The man who came with her lunch scared her. He talked loud and always stayed longer if she looked him in the eye.
“Dina?”
The man spoke. If she ignored him he’d leave.
“Sweetheart?”
Dina frowned. The man called her names, before but never sweetheart. She turned her head and saw Doc. He didn’t have lunch with him. This wasn’t strange. She’d seen Doc before. Not in a doctor’s lab coat with a clipboard, but in his sunglasses and the corduroy blazer he liked to wear when he took her to dinner near the governor’s mansion. Dr. Robinson had changed her medication because of the seizures. That’s what she could remember. When she told him that Cue kept coming to her room he said it was a side effect. She understood now that he wasn’t real. It was most likely he was one of the doctors or orderlies who had put on Cue’s face before coming to visit. She turned her gaze back to the window.
“Sweetheart. It’s me. Doc.”
“No you’re not,” she said, but it came out as a drawl of slurred words. Where had her voice gone?
“I’m not fooled.”
She could hear him approaching. Sometimes Cue and Rodney visited and walked around her room. Both of them tried to explain why they hated each other. Both of them told her they agreed she belonged in this place. But they never approached her. They never touched her. Like Dr. Robinson said, a touch is how you can tell if a person was real.
“Dina,” Cue touched her shoulder.
She looked up at him. His eyes brimmed with tears. His face was flushed and red. She hated the color red. She hated the color red in his cheeks. And his hand felt warm and familiar. Could it be the mean orderly trying to play a trick on her? It was most likely the case. Go away.
“It’s me. It’s Doc.”
No it isn’t. Get out of my head.
He dropped to his knees and took h
er hands. She wanted to curl them into fists but they weren’t really strong enough to do so. He put her hands to his face. “Touch me. I’m real.”
She had no choice but to touch his face. Unable to speak outside of some mumbles and unable to control her fingers and body the way she wished, she had little to no reaction. His beard was new.
“I’ve missed you so much babe. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here. I should have never left you. Forgive me.”
Doc?
Tears slipped from his eyes. She didn’t have the ability to cry today. For seem reason her face felt frozen. Today she wished for tears. She wanted him to know how happy she was to see him. Instead she just stared at him emotionless.
Doc!
Cue pulled her up out of the chair into his arms. His embrace was so strong she was able to stand. And with some measured control she was able to lift her arms to his neck. He noticed. He hugged her tightly.
It’s you. It’s really you!
“Yes. That’s right. It’s Doc. It’s me. I’m here.”
What happened to you? Why did you leave me? She lifted her head and looked at him. She was able to look at him. He touched her face and held her to him with one arm. “You see me, don’t you? You understand.” He kissed her brow. “It’s okay. We’re getting out of here. Today. Now. Do you have clothes? Regular clothes?” He walked her over to the bed and sat her down.
She glanced to the closet.
“In the closet?” he asked. He found her suitcase inside. He pulled off the clothes from the hangers and brought the suitcase over. He went to the bathroom and gathered what he could find as toiletries and packed the rest. He picked up a pair of jeans, and a turtleneck and sweater.
“Can you get dressed?” he asked.
I think so.
He didn’t hear her. How could he? He started to dress her, and she did her best to help him by lifting her leg and pulling on her shirt. He moved fast. He was in a hurry, and she had many fears as to the reason. Dina stared blankly at him for a moment. Her vision blurred, then corrected. She was dressed, but her concentration was slipping. She couldn’t remember him one moment and then felt like crying at the sight of him the next. He cupped her face in his hands. “Focus sweetheart. We’re almost done.”
We can’t. Dr. Robinson said I’m a danger to you. I need to stay here.
“I’m going to get you out of here. Trust me,” he said as if he heard her. Maybe he had super powers? Maybe he could read her thoughts. When he looked up at her and smiled she knew the truth. He was just a man. A very flawed human trying to figure it all out, just like her.
“Wait here,” he told her. She watched him slip out the door. She could hear him speaking with someone in the hall. Her head turned and she looked for the sun outside the window. It was gone. Dina pushed herself to stand. She shuffled a bit, but felt stronger on her own two feet. She sat in her chair and stared up to the sky. The sun was back. All thoughts of Doc and his mysterious visit disappeared.
“Dina Erickson?”
The male nurse paused. He stared at Cue with uncertainty.
“I’m Dr. Walsh, I’ll take her dosage.” Cue handed him Dina’s release papers. This nurse didn’t bother to read them. He handed over the cup of pills.
“Thanks, I’ll need an escort for us. She’s almost ready.”
“Yes, doctor,” the man said, and turned to go to the phone in the hall. When Cue, returned Dina had once again sat down in the chair near the window. She looked over at him with those dazed round beautiful eyes of hers. It was as if she were seeing him for the first time. He went to her the way he did before. Reminded her of who he was and promised to take her out of the place. He stood her and hugged her until she hugged him back. Her mute state wasn’t surprising. Cue had hoped that her brief period on the drugs Robinson had put her on wouldn’t have a lasting effect.
“You are okay babe, you’re okay.”
The door opened and a man came in with a wheelchair. He sat Dina in it and put her bag on her lap. The nurse got her luggage. He wheeled her out of the room and walked the hall, knowing his crime was being recorded. He lifted his face to make sure the security camera got a good shot of him breaking the law. Once below, he got his car and the nurse helped Dina. She seemed to get a second wind, getting inside without any assistance. Once he was driving away, he let go the breath of panic and rage he had been holding in his chest.
“I knew you would come,” she said and smiled.
He glanced over to her and she nodded. She mumbled a few things under her breath and continued to stare up at the sky. He wished she could communicate more. He had hope that in a few days she would.
Cue pulled into a BP gas station and parked. “Give me a sec,” he said. After filling up his tank for the drive to Blue Ridge, he went inside and got her a bottle of water. He came back out to find Dina had left the car. She was walking away.
“Dina!”
She turned and looked at him curiously. Then she smiled. He took her hand and walked her back to the car. He put her inside and clicked the seatbelt. When she was secure, he could breathe again. He got in the car with her.
“Dina, look at me.”
She did.
“How do you feel?” he asked.
She yawned.
“Okay. We’re going to take your medicine. Not all of it. Just half a pill okay? Just enough so you don’t get sick.”
She nodded that she understood.
“Enough to ween you off of it. Don’t worry sweetheart. I know what I’m doing.”
She smiled. He leaned in and kissed her brow. He bit the pill to give her half. She took the medicine without complaining. He kissed her on the lips.
“Ready for an adventure?” he asked.
She turned her gaze to the clouds outside of her passenger window.
“Good, we’re about to have one.”
Chapter Twenty
The Waking Truth
The cabin had cost him a pretty penny. He had enough money to set them up with food and the essentials. But his funds were depleted. He looked up at the two-story log home and smiled. He had always wanted to bring her to one just like it. He knew how much she enjoyed lakes and him rowing her across them.
“We’re here,” he said.
Dina slept with the side of her head on the glass. Her mouth open with a strand of drool she looked like an angel to him. He got out of the car and took her luggage inside first. He came for her last. Because she was so lethargic, he carried her inside. For the first night, he expected many symptoms. He would not give her any more doses of the medicine. He put her in the bed in the bedroom and took off her shoes. He covered her with an extra blanket. She turned over and mumbled one word: “Doc.”
It was the first time she had audibly said his name, and immediately he felt his chest swell with emotion. He laid a kiss on her lips like a prince would give his princess and left.
For the next two hours Cue did what he could to set things up. He wasn’t a cook, but there was a crockpot there that he could use to make soups and chili. He logged into the system and checked for any patient update or contact from Clearview. No alarm bells had been rung. Tomorrow Robinson would learn that he had taken Dina. He wasn’t sure if he’d alert Singh, and if Robinson did, what he’d tell the director was uncertain. But he was prepared.
Cue put on his thick jacket, work gloves and boots. He went back outside and around the cabin to where there were blocks of wood and a chopping ax on a tree stump. He pulled out the ax, set a block of wood on the stump and proceeded to work.
“Morning neighbor!” a man said from behind him.
Cue jumped. He turned to see an older man in a military fatigue jacket. He had a hunting rifle on him. Cue frowned.
“Sorry. Didn’t mean to frighten ya.”
“Where did you come from?” Cue asked, staring at the rifle.
“Just over there. I’m your neighbor. I live here and keep my eye on the Grimson place. I knew it was rented for the next two wee
ks. Just thought I’d stop bye and say hello, in case there is something you need.”
“Thank you. I’m fine.”
“Here with the family?” The man looked to the cabin.
“Why?” Cue asked.
“Oh, sorry. Hard habit to break. Name is Jess,” he extended his hand. “Just being neighborly.”
Cue didn’t need to add to suspicion. If Robinson decided to report him to the authorities, his face would be all over the six o’clock news tomorrow. He shook Jess’s hand.
“I’m here alone.”
“No worries. Well, it is nice to meet you. Again, if you take that path yonder you can reach me just fine. Snow moving in soon, so good thing you chopping early. Used to do it for the guests, but my back gave out a year ago. Again, I’m just up a ways. I hunt on the other side of the lake. Well, nice to see you. Enjoy your stay.”
Cue didn’t say a thing. He watched Jess disappear into the forest. He let go the breath he was holding and considered the unnecessary lie he told. Already his guilt was controlling him. He picked up the ax and chopped wood for the next hour. He carried in the logs and secured the doors on the cabin. The windows had no curtains, and from any angle on the property a person could see inside. But he didn’t let that disturb him. He had a license to carry too. The fireplace in the living room, guest room and master room were all lit. When he was done, he turned the chili down to the lowest setting and left it covered. She lay on her side. She hadn’t moved from that spot. He took off his jacket and boots and got in the bed with her.
“Dina?”
She turned to him and slipped her arms around his waist. He stroked her hair and held her under the covers. She never opened her eyes. She never spoke. She lay in his arms and slept. Soon he did so as well.