Once a Scoundrel

by Anna Harrington

  He stopped behind her, not touching yet close enough that she could feel the heat of his body warming hers.

  “You care about me?” she whispered, the breathless words shattering the darkness. She didn’t dare hope...

  “Very much.”

  She squeezed her eyes shut against the tears. “But you said you can’t...can’t forgive me...”

  “Because there’s nothing to forgive.”

  A gasp tore from her as she turned to face him. She couldn’t believe— “You don’t...hate me? After the way I refused you, after all those horrible things I said...”

  “I could never hate you, Faith.” He slipped his arms around her and pulled her against him, holding her close. “I know how hard my return has been for you.” He stroked his hands in small, reassuring circles across her back. “How much I hurt you before, how confused I’m making you now...I’m the one who needs to be forgiven.”

  A soft sob fell from her lips. Her heart was too full to find any words to express how she felt, how much she loved him. All she could do was tighten her hold around his waist to keep him close. Always.

  “I want a life with you, a home, and children.” He nuzzled his cheek against her hair, and the affection in that little caress made her tremble. “I promise you that I will be the husband you deserve and that I will be faithful in every way.”

  Lifting her head from his chest, she rose up on her tip-toes to brush her lips against his. He closed his eyes against the tenderness of her kiss.

  “Faith,” he rasped out, “my darling...I’ve made a mess of things...you, Mary, Jeremy...Daniel.”

  “It isn’t your fault,” she whispered against his lips, each word a breath of absolution for both of them. “No one’s to blame, certainly not you.”

  How could the past four years have been anyone’s fault? Mama was right. What power did a person truly have over his or her heart? Fools all, to think that emotions could ever be controlled. How well she knew that truth herself! Because if she could have controlled her heart, she never would have fallen in love with Stephen all those years ago, and she wouldn’t have tumbled back into love with him once he returned.

  But thank God she had.

  “I never meant to hurt you,” he confessed as he rained tender kisses against her cheek, her jaw, her lips—each one filled with regret, each one leaving her desperate to erase his pain. “I only wanted to make you happy.”

  With a nervous stutter of her heart, yet undeniably certain of the love she felt for him, she cupped his face in her hands. “Then make me happy,” she whispered, touching her lips to his. “Make love to me.”

  *****

  Stephen stared down at her, his heart pounding and his stomach suddenly tying itself into knots. “I do, you know,” he murmured as he pulled the pins from her hair.

  Her eyes closed as he combed his trembling fingers through her tresses, spreading the soft waves down her back in a silky curtain. “Do what?”

  “Love you,” he whispered breathlessly.

  Her eyes flew open. Stunned, she gazed up at him with parted lips, as if she couldn’t believe he’d said it, and that disbelief gnawed at him.

  He’d given her so little reason to trust him over the years. But he resolved to prove to her exactly how much he’d changed, how much he needed her to heal his soul. And most of all, how much he loved her. Starting tonight.

  “Four years ago, I took you for granted,” he continued, “and I was a damned fool not to recognize how much you meant to me or all I’d lost by leaving. Your friendship.” He placed a soft kiss against her cheek. “Your caring.” Another kiss to the tip of her nose. “Your brilliance and tenderness.” Two kisses on her eyelids, and his heart nearly shattered when he tasted the salt tears there. “Your love.”

  He gently caressed his mouth back and forth across hers. She sighed beneath his kiss, and he knew then that she was finally his. His heart soared with joy.

  “When Daniel died and Mary lost her chance at a future with him,” he murmured, staring down into her eyes, “I realized how precious life is. And I swore to myself that I’d make everything right. That I’d take care of Mary and protect Daniel’s son and his reputation, that I’d find a way to convince you that I’d changed. That I wasn’t the same boy I’d been before but a man worthy of you.” Nervous uncertainty flared inside him as he searched her face in the shadows. She hadn’t yet said...“Do you think you could find it in your heart to love me, Faith?”

  “I do love you,” she whispered, each word a trembling admission. “I’ve always loved you.”

  With a laugh of happiness, he lifted her into his arms and spun her in a circle, then captured her mouth in a kiss that left both of them gasping for breath.

  Beneath her eager lips, his laughter turned into a groan of desire. Dear God, how long he’d waited for this, to hear those words fall from her lips and feel the softness of her in his arms, freely giving both the physical love of her body and the healing love of her soul. Faith clung to him, her arms wrapped so tightly around his shoulders that she seemed unwilling to ever let go. Which was perfectly fine with him.

  He carried her across the room to the bed. As he laid her down gently on the mattress, he leaned over to suck at her bottom lip and drew a moaning sigh of pleasure from her that left him shaking so hard that his fingers fumbled to unfasten the row of tiny buttons on her bodice. There was no turning back now. There was only going forward into the future. Together.

  He peeled the dress away, then relished in slowly removing each undergarment. As one layer after another dropped away and bared stretches of smooth flesh, he followed along in their wake with his mouth, murmuring continuously against her skin how beautiful she was, how much he loved her...

  When only her chemise and stockings remained, he broke a lingering kiss to stand beside the bed and stare down at her. Sweet Lord, she was a vision in the slant of moonlight that fell from the window across the bed. So beautiful, so delicate...so much like an angel that she stole his breath away. She watched him curiously as he removed his clothes and tossed aside the dusty redingote and breeches he’d worn all the way from London, riding straight through to get here, never realizing that Faith would be waiting for him like a wish come true.

  He pulled off his boots and dropped them one by one to the floor, followed by his neck cloth and waistcoat. When he pulled his shirt off over his head, baring himself from the waist up and leaving him in only his riding breeches, he heard her catch her breath, and her lips pulled into a soft O of surprise. Her gaze raked over him, and shamelessly, he let her look. She was still innocent, and the thought that she was giving that innocence to him sent his heart racing with both trembling nervousness and selfish pleasure.

  Slowly, careful not to make her any more nervous than she already was, he unbuttoned the fall of his breeches and pushed them down and off until he was completely naked. How much could she see in the moonlight and shadows as her gaze traveled over him? He had no idea, but when he crawled back onto the bed with her and stretched his tall body alongside hers, her breath came in shallow pants not from fear but desire.

  “You are so beautiful, Faith,” he murmured, trailing his hand over her hip and down her leg. When he hooked his fingers beneath the hem of her chemise and gently tugged it upward, she shivered.

  “So are you,” she whispered breathlessly, her nervous misspeak earning her a low chuckle from him.

  “I can’t tell you how many times I lay awake in bed and dreamed of being with you.” To ease her nervousness when the hem reached the apex of her thighs, he lowered his head to place a distracting kiss against her throat, rewarding him in turn by the delicious beat of her racing pulse against his lips.

  “I wish you hadn’t,” she admitted, her voice a soft ache.

  He lifted onto his forearm to stare down into her face, puzzled. “Why not?”

  Her eyes lowered to his mouth, not so much because she wanted him to kiss her but to shyly avoid making eye contact. “I�
��ll never live up to your fantasy.”

  “No,” he countered softly, outlining her lips with his fingertip. “You’re so much better than I ever imagined.”

  Before she could argue, he kissed her, this time drinking in her sweetness and stirring up the desire already flaming inside her. When he lifted the chemise the rest of the way up her body and cast it away to the floor, leaving her naked, there was no nervousness between them, no awkwardness. She didn’t try to cover herself, not even when he gazed down at her in the moonlight.

  “So beautiful,” he repeated in an incredulous murmur and drifted his hand over her body, fluttering lightly over her breasts and all the way down to the soft curls guarding her womanhood. “An angel.”

  He placed a tender kiss on her nipple, then another and another, until it puckered into a hard point. Unable to resist, he closed his lips around it and took a gentle suck.

  “Stephen!” she gasped, her hands going to his head.

  A low chuckle rose in his throat at her reaction, and he shamelessly took another suck, this time drawing her deeper into his mouth. She moaned and arched her back beneath him, thrusting her breasts toward him.

  “So sweet,” he mumbled against her breast, her fingers running through the hair at his nape in soft encouragement.

  As he suckled his fill of her, his hand caressed her other breast and massaged her fullness beneath his palm. He teased her nipple into a hard point to match the first, then slid his mouth over to claim the same delicious taste of it. She was perfect, warm and soft, so incredibly sweet, and everything about her soothed his pained soul. He’d suspected that she’d be able to heal him the way nothing else could, and as he felt the happiness swell in his chest, he knew he’d been correct. Only Faith, only this sweet joining of bodies and souls with her.

  Each plundering kiss against her mouth and each caress of his hands across her breasts made it impossible for her to lie still beneath him. She whimpered softly and shifted her hips against the mattress, and he nearly groaned at the arousal blossoming inside her, so unknown to her that she didn’t know how to ask for what her body wanted.

  But he knew, and he would happily give her what she craved. He slipped his hand down through the triangle of curls, his fingers sliding into the damp heat of her folds beneath. He stroked against her—

  “Stephen,” she moaned against his mouth, then tossed all inhibition aside by spreading her thighs and latching onto his tongue with her lips, suckling as sweetly at him as he had at her breasts. He hardened instantly, and all of him ached with a desperate longing to claim her as his.

  His Faith. Now and always.

  As his fingers caressed against her, arousal flamed inside him with each daring suck of her lips and with each plunge of her tongue inside his mouth to share the wonderful intimacy of their kiss. The intoxicating sounds of her soft mewings and whimpers of need swirled through him and made him long to hear her moan with pleasure and cry out with passion.

  Breaking the kiss, he shifted away just far enough to gaze down at her and watch the emotions flittering across her face as he slipped two fingers inside her silky warmth.

  “Oh!” She tensed for a moment, then relaxed. She let out a long sigh as he continued to caress inside her in smooth, steady strokes. “Oh my...”

  He placed a kiss at her temple. “Does that feel good?”

  “Oh heavens...yes...very much,” she answered between pants.

  “Very much,” he repeated with a smile as he watched her close her eyes against the mounting ache growing inside her, so strongly that he could feel it pulsing against his fingers as he swirled them inside her.

  His thumb delved down into her folds to find the tiny nub buried there. He rubbed it lightly, and she responded with a shiver, her sex clenching tight around his fingers and demanding to be brought to release. So tight and warm and slippery...He couldn’t believe how much she trusted him, making herself open and vulnerable to him like this. Just as he couldn’t believe how beautiful she was. Or how very much he loved her.

  “Faith,” he whispered and touched her most sensitive spot again, this time pressing down hard enough that a low moan tore from her. Her arms wrapped around his neck to keep him close, and her thighs quivered. “Darling Faith.”

  He rubbed her again, and a wave of pleasure swept through her in a shuddering release. Her body clenched around his, then she went limp beneath him on the mattress, her lips parting and panting to recapture the breath he’d stolen.

  The expression of pure joy on her face nearly undid him. He whispered chokingly around the knot in his throat, “I love you, my darling.”

  Lifting onto his forearms, he settled himself into the cradle of her spread thighs. All of him shook with emotion and need as he positioned the head of his erection against her, notching himself there as he paused to enjoy another lingering kiss at her heated lips. He would only have this moment once, this first joining with her, and he wanted to savor it, to be able to remember it always.

  He whispered, “My Faith...my angel...” My life.

  With a sigh of longing against her mouth, he lowered his hips and sank inside her.

  Faith closed her eyes and held her breath as his warm, hard body so slowly, so lovingly filled hers. She expanded to take him in, her already sensitized womanhood tingling achingly with each patient plunge and retreat. Each caressing stroke of his body went slightly deeper than before, and with each, he placed a reassuring kiss on her lips. Tears gathered at her lashes at the unbelievable tenderness in him. She’d never imagined that being with a man could be like this—

  No, it was only because of Stephen. No other man could have made her feel as beautiful and wanted as he did, so feminine and desirable...so loved.

  He stilled and held himself poised over her. With his eyes squeezed closed, he whispered her name as he lowered his mouth to cover hers. Then he thrust his hips forward and plunged fully inside her.

  She gasped at the sharp pinch inside her, and her body tensed around him at the fleeting pain.

  But when Stephen began to move his hips against hers in slow, steady strokes, the discomfort faded, replaced by a tingling ache that grew more and more demanding. The same tingling ache which had engulfed her when he’d caressed her with his fingers, and oh how wonderful that had been! If he could do that to her with just his hand, to think what he could do to her with his body—

  Heaven. She rolled back her head and arched herself beneath him.

  A growling sound of pleasure tore from his throat. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and began to thrust deep and hard. The same engulfing tension as before sped through her, but this time it was so much more intense than before. It tightened every muscle in her body from the tips of her toes to the top of her head. She rose up against him to meet every thrust, craving more, needing more. The throbbing ache inside her swelled like the tightening of a coiled spring—

  She broke with a cry. Pleasure rushed through her in a wave. The world around her vanished, until all she knew was the exquisite release pulsing through her and the joy of having his body enveloping hers. When her pulse slowed and the deafening rush of blood pounding in her ears subsided, she felt his lips at her ear whispering over and over how much he loved her.

  She could do nothing more than cling to him as he continued to stroke into her, her arms wrapped around his neck and her ankles locked together at the small of his back. As his tempo increased, so did the intensity of their joining, and each thrust now came as a jerky, grinding drive of his hips against hers.

  With a low groan, he plunged deep inside her and held himself there for a heartbeat, then with a shudder poured himself inside her. At this new, wholly wonderful sensation of his life’s essence flowing into her, a pulse of joy swept through her, and a tear slipped down her cheek.

  He rested his forehead against her bare shoulder as he struggled to regain his breath, trembling and covered with perspiration. When he recovered, he placed a tender kiss on her lips. His eyes glis
tened in the moonlight as they stared down into hers, their bodies still joined below, and their hearts beating fiercely into each other’s chest.

  “I love you, Faith,” he whispered, his mouth so close to hers that she shivered at each warm breath that stirred across her lips. “I’m going to prove to you that I deserve your love, that I will always keep you safe.” He kissed her. “And I’m going to spend the rest of my life making you happy.”

  She blinked away tears of joy and breathed, “You already have.”

  He kissed her, softly and tenderly, then shifted his weight off her to lie beside her on the bed. She snuggled into his arms, never wanting to leave their warm embrace. When he pulled the coverlet over them, to keep away the chill of the night and tuck them together, she rested her palm against his chest and reveled in the strength of his heart beating beneath her fingertips.

  Fate had given them a second chance at love, and the future they would create together would be one of happiness, home, and family.

  Family. Her belly tightened. She knew how children were created— “We didn’t...take precautions,” she whispered, embarrassment heating her cheeks.

  He grinned at her. “We certainly did not.”

  The faint warmth flared into a full-out burning blush. She rested her cheek against his chest to hide her face, afraid he might be able to see her reaction even in the moonlight and know how happy the thought made her that she might have gotten with his child.

  “So I guess you’ll have to make an honest man of me and marry me, or my reputation will be ruined,” he teased with mock solemnity. “I’ll never be able to wear white gowns and be presented at court now.”

  She swatted gently at his shoulder, but he caught her hand and raised it to his lips. He placed a kiss against her palm, then set about sucking on each of her fingertips until she trembled. All the teasing between them vanished.

  “You will marry me, Faith,” he assured her as his lips moved from finger to finger, stirring a new ache between her legs and leaving her to wonder how long they had to wait before they could make love again. “You will be my wife, my marchioness, and the mother of my children.” He trailed his mouth down her inner wrist. “And I will always be your dutiful husband. In.” He placed a kiss on her forearm. “Every.” Another kiss in the crook of her elbow. “Way.”