"Why?"
"In a way you were right." Kate took a reflective sip of tea, and then met his eyes across the rim of the cup. "Catriona is dead, besides there's' no point. Apart from you, no one even remembers or cares."
"You're not going back to Australia?"
"Maybe for the odd holiday." She gave another expressive shrug. "Not to live."
"So everything is all neat and tidy?"
"Not quite." Kate looked him in the eye, noting his sudden wariness. "There's Sarah."
He put his cup on the saucer with a distinct click. "Sarah's my daughter, Kate, and she stays mine."
His clipped voice and implacable expression made her courage falter.
"I'm not about to contest that." She breathed deeply trying to steady the steel winged butterflies in her stomach.
"Then what exactly are you suggesting?"
"What have you told her about me, Alex?"
"That you were young and confused and couldn't look after her," he answered, running an agitated hand through his hair. "And God knows, it was no more than the truth."
"So you didn't succumb to the temptation to say I was dead. I was almost certain you would have. It would cover the very last loophole."
"I ensured my daughter would never be dragged around as excess baggage by an unwilling mother," he snapped. "Why should I tell her you were dead and leave the slender chance she could prove me a liar."
Kate winced. "I have no quarrel with you over her care, Alex."
"Then what is it you want?"
"I want to get to know her." She prayed she hadn't been mistaken that night at her cottage. "She's my child too."
"Something you've conveniently ignored since she was a few days old."
"Given the circumstances, most people would find that easy to forgive. Now I want to change that."
Alex paced aggressively across to his desk and then back to the chair and flung himself down. "I won't have Sarah upset. You trying to muscle in on her life will upset her."
Kate's hands clenched, but she fought down the hot, intemperate words. "You want it all your way, don't you?"
"In this instance, yes."
"What about me Alex?" she demanded in a low, tense voice.
"What about you? Are you suffering from belated mothering symptoms?"
With iron control, she tamped down her anger. She rose and walked to the window, looking at the view with unseeing eyes, breathing slowly and deeply to quell her nerves.
Then she turned to face him.
"Had I stayed with you after Sarah was born, I could never have given her a tenth of the love and care you have." She met his stern grey gaze, pushing a strand of hair back behind her ear with an unsteady hand. "I hated and resented you too much to be fair to your child."
"And what's changed?"
"I have."
Kate spread her hands wide, praying she was right. Alex had a rigid code of ethics, but would he refuse her request?
"I'm not asking for much, Alex. I need to repair my life. After all, this is a very small recompense, considering how much you owe me."
Their gazes met and held. His grim expression never changed but when he gave a small nod of agreement, the sense of triumph was heady.
Retribution works two ways. I didn't misunderstand. If I'm careful he won't refuse.
"What exactly are you wanting, Catriona?"
'"The chance to visit Sarah, one afternoon a week, so we can get to know each other," she said simply, gazes clashing. Kate held her breath.
"And if I don't agree?"
"I'm very loath to threaten you, Alex. Unless you do allow me to visit my daughter, then it's only a matter of time before Sarah discovers how she was conceived. How do you think you're going to fare with her when she knows that?"
Alex went ashen under his tan. He surged out of his chair and took a threatening step towards her. "How dare you suggest it?"
"Why?" She spread her hands in an expressive gesture. "How worried were you about your precious principles when you kidnapped me and robbed me of my birth-right? You may be able to keep Sarah away from me for a few years, but for the rest of her life? Hardly."
"Don't tempt me," he snarled, towering over her.
Kate never budged, refusing to be intimidated.
"You're enjoying this aren't you?" he asked, when she stayed silent.
"No, I don't like hurting anyone. And I would never do anything to harm Sarah."
"Unless I agree to let you see her?"
As she watched him, Kate knew he was infuriated at being forced to submit to her demands.
"But you will," she countered. "Tell me Alex, how would you react if any man did to Sarah what you did to me?"
The savage expression that snaked across his face appalled Kate. He spun away, leant across his desk and flicked through his personal diary.
"You can come to The Birches on Sunday afternoon for two hours." He swung back towards her. "Say or do anything to upset Sarah and you won't come again. And I want your promise. You will not reveal your relationship until I consider Sarah's ready."
Relief coursed through Kate at his capitulation.
This was more than she'd dared hope for. For the moment she was satisfied. Later, when she knew Sarah, she would suggest visits to her own house. For now she was content.
"Thank you." She dipped her head in acknowledgement. "I won't betray your trust."
"Believe me you'll regret it if you do Kate Audley," he said, with a twisted cynical smile.
"No Alex." Kate met his gaze steadily. "I don't trust you an inch. I have taken precautions."
Alex lifted his head, his expression suspicious. "Precautions?"
"I have filed legally binding affidavits in safe deposit against my disappearance." Kate spread her hands wide, not looking away, her voice betraying no nuance of emotion. "If you threaten me, in any way, or lay one finger on me against my will, I will lay criminal charges of abduction and kidnap against you. Any court would entertain a custody suit from me under those circumstances. So don't threaten me, Alex."
For several moments there was a fraught silence. Kate held her breath trembling.
Finally, he dipped his head in acknowledgement of her victory.
The expression in his eyes, a mix of regret, admiration and vulnerability was gone so swiftly Kate wasn't sure she'd read it correctly.
"So we meet as equals. You're a brave woman. Few people have ever dared threaten me, and not live to regret it." He lifted his hand and ran a finger down her cheek. "Just remember Sarah is the innocent pawn on our power game. Don't hurt her."
"You have my word." Kate extended her hand and he took it in both of his and held it tightly. "Until Sunday?"
"Until Sunday. I'll tell Sarah to expect you." He put his hands on her shoulders and drew her slowly forward.
Kate's breath caught in her throat, her heart hammered as she struggled to pull free.
She never wanted this man to kiss her again.
"Don't." Unable to break his grip, she turned her head to one side in an effort to evade his descending lips. His large hand came up under her chin holding her face captive.
"There's only one way to seal a bargain between a man and a woman, Catriona," he said softly, "and that's with a kiss."
He leaned forward. His lips brushed hers, the touch as soft as a butterfly's wing.
Then she was free.
Kate stared at him wildly disturbed. She swept up her bag and fled.
All the way to her car, her heart hammered in her chest. The touch of his lips a burning brand.
*****
"Do come in."
Paula led Kate into the lounge where Brett was busy pouring drinks. "Whisky or sherry, Kate."
"Sherry, thanks." She turned to the large blonde giant waiting to be introduced.
"Bryce Bennett works with Brett. This is our friend Kate Audley."
Kate smiled, acknowledging the introduction.
Bryce reminded her of an eager, over
grown puppy. A tiny amused smile touched her lips.
"So what do you do?" Bryce's response to that smile was unnerving.
"I sell houses. Are you interested in buying one in this locality?" Kate's professional smile was firmly in place.
"You never miss a beat." Brett grinned at his guest's stunned reaction at being prospected. "You can see why she's so successful."
"I remember being at a sales seminar once, where we were told that every person we meet is a potential customer."
"That's true of our line, too." Brett watched his sidekick with barely concealed mockery. Paula was dreaming if she thought this boy would suit Kate.
"No shop." Paula threw up her hands in horror. "Kate you should know better than to get Brett talking sales."
"You enjoy the fruits of my labours," Brett teased his wife, slipping an arm around her pregnant waistline.
Their closeness made Kate envious. Paula and Brett were so very much in love, even after twelve years of marriage.
"Why so sad?" Bryce asked, close to her ear.
Kate shrugged. "They restore your faith in marriage."
He watched her, blue eyes shrewd. "You've had a bad experience with marriage?"
"Whatever gave you that idea?"
"You have sad eyes."
This man was either very astute, or Brett had been talking. Maybe she had been too quick in dismissing him.
"Who is there who hasn't known some sadness?"
"Not many." His eyes held hers as Paula did the last minute preparations for dinner. 'Would you like to continue this discussion at our leisure?"
It was an oblique way of asking if she wanted to further the acquaintance. Kate nodded. A casual date with Bryce Bennett was a good place to start her new life.
Paula surpassed herself, the dinner was excellent. Afterwards she entertained Bryce, while Kate helped Brett load the dishes into the washer. "How did your meeting go with Korda?"
"He's given me permission to visit Sarah on Sunday."
"'We'll keep our fingers crossed for you."
Kate wiped the counter keeping her head averted. "Don't build pipe dreams, Brett. Alex told Dave he was getting married."
Brett glanced at her. "Does that bother you?"
Kate spread her hands in an eloquent gesture. "As I walked away from him, it would be unreasonable to object. Besides, Bryce wouldn't like to hear me talking about another man when he's asked me out."
"You can say that again." Bryce came into the kitchen. "Paula wants to know if you went to Peru for the coffee beans."
Kate flushed. How much had he overheard?
After coffee, Bryce and Kate made their excuses and he escorted her to her car. "Would you like to have dinner with me on Sunday?"
"Not Sunday." Kate shook her head. "I'm busy. Could we make it one day next week."
"I'll phone you." Bryce shut her car door. "Drive carefully."
Kate wound down the window and gave him her hand and he raised it to his lips and kissed it.
Driving home, Kate thought about that brief kiss. How different it was from that one fleeting kiss of Alex's. It had seared her soul for hours.
Chapter Eight
Time crawled towards the appointed hour for Kate to visit Sarah. The whole time during the short drive to the Birches a war waged inside her, memories and tension tore her ragged. As much as she craved time with Sarah, she dreaded facing Alex on what was now his home turf.
Despite her uneasiness, she was impressed by the transformation. The lovely old house now possessed a mellow, cared for appearance it had lacked for many a year. But all that paled into insignificance as she hesitated, very unsure about this shaky step into unknown territory. Fighting down nerves she rang the doorbell.
When Alex opened the door she inhaled sharply.
He was dressed entirely in black.
An omen?
The dark colour highlighted the silver in his hair and made him appear darker and more powerful.
Now I'm being melodramatic.
"Come in, Catriona."
Her heart bucked in her chest as she hesitated on the threshold.
Suddenly, the memory of her first visit to this man at his home was far too vivid. She stood poised on the threshold unsure whether to stay or bolt.
She glanced at Alex and glimpsed a surprising vulnerability. Was he also remembering?
He caught her hand and holding it firmly as he looked into her eyes. "You have my word of honour, Catriona. You are safe here. Free to come and go as you choose."
So he does remember.
"Had I thought otherwise, I would never have agreed to visit."
She freed her hand, unnerved by her reaction to the simple gesture. Desperate for a less fraught topic, she looked past him into the house noting the changes. "The Birches has never looked this good."
The old house gleamed.
Cork floors highlighted the brilliant jewel colours of Persian rugs scattered along its length. Walls of opal green, a perfect foil for the cleaned and re-polished panelling and an impressive collection of paintings. The sun shone through the leadlight windows creating a rainbow of colour imbuing the house with a warm, mellow beauty.
"Do you like what we've done?" Alex asked, watching her intently a tiny smile creasing his stern mouth. "Dave Storey told me you've always loved this old place."
"I do like it. And I love that you've managed to keep its intrinsic character. But I would have hated to foot the bills on my budget."
"I can imagine." He gave her a shrewd smile. "My architect threw up his hands in horror. He suggested we tear it down."
"You wouldn't have?"
"When the estimates came in I have to confess I was tempted. The house was in a worse shape than we thought." He shook his head, expression rueful. "Only the fear of incurring your wrath saved it from the bulldozers."
Startled she looked away, not prepared to touch that comment. "Where is Sarah?"
"Sorry, here I am keeping you talking. Sarah's eager to meet you. She's in her play room."
He led the way towards the large room on the first floor. Agitated, Kate laid a hand on his arm before he could open the door. "What have you told her?"
"That an old friend of mine was coming to visit. Don't be nervous she's a loving little girl."
An old friend—I'm hardly that.
Kate inhaled a deep, ragged breath as he opened the door. Her eyes immediately fixed on the little girl sitting at a small table industriously cutting paper with scissors.
The afternoon sun burnished her hair and it seemed to Kate's fanciful imagination, the child resembled a golden angel. She glanced up, saw her father and was out of her chair, bouncing across the room into his arms.
And the image was broken.
"Daddy, you've come."
"I said I would," he said in a deep, growly voice tickling her ribs making her laugh.
This child was no angel just a normal little girl. As she watched them, sorrow etched furrows in Kate's heart. They looked so comfortable with each other. Will there ever be a place for me in my daughter's life?
Alex turned toward her. "I've brought my friend, Kate Audley."
"Hello Sarah," Kate said gravely, worried Sarah would recognize her as the vase throwing harpy.
Sarah studied her, head on one side and then gave a gamin gap-tooth smile. "Hi Kate, Daddy said he was bringing a friend."
Sarah extended a hand, a strangely adult gesture. Kate took it in hers, resisting the compulsion to sweep the child into her arms and smother her with hugs and kisses, and never let her go.
The fierceness of the impulse shook her to her soul.
Afraid she would betray herself, she glanced at Alex, and it was too easy to be careful.
"Would you like to see my project?" Sarah was blithely unaware of the undercurrents.
"Of course." Kate fought the catch in her throat as she walked across the room in Sarah's wake. "What are you doing?"
"Homework. We have to match thes
e animals to the skellingtons." Sarah studied the project form with its pictures of animals and different sized skeletons to be cut out and pasted in the blank spaces next to them.
Yesterday's Sins Page 11