“Frank, listen. I’m sorry. But I had nothing to do with—”
“YOU’RE FUCKING LYING!” he yells and launches at me, grabbing at my shirt, dragging my body back to my feet. I’m trying to break free of his hold, but his rage is making him way stronger than me.
“Frank, please, I’m pregnant,” I beg, my voice quivering. God, the baby. Don’t let him hurt the baby.
“Well, isn’t that just sweet to hear. What are you expecting, a congratulations from me?” His eyes are wild with hate. I’m trying not to panic, but it’s impossible.
“Frank, please…”
“You ruined my life,” he spits, pushing me so forcefully that I trip and slam against the wall. My head goes crashing into the hard surface, causing stars to form behind my lids. He pounces on me, but I bolt to the left, trying to run for the door.
I’m not quick enough, and he grabs at my hair once again. I scream, the pain doubling this time as he pulls back, whipping my body around like a rag doll. I’m thrown back to the ground, my arms protecting my stomach as I fall on my side. A stinging pain jolts up my spine, causing my eyes to water.
“You fucking bitch. Get up.” He stalks over to me and then he rears his foot back ready to kick me. I quickly curl into the fetal position before he has a chance to reach his intended target.
My stomach.
Pain explodes down on my backside where I take the brunt of the kick, and I howl out in pain.
“P-Please, I’m s-sorry, I’ll tell them I lied, I swear it!” I cry, but it does no good. I risk looking up at him and wish I didn’t.
My eyes meet the barrel of a gun.
“I said get the fuck up.”
I’m crying heavily now, and it takes me a moment to get fully to my feet. I try and speak—to plead with him—but his gun comes smashing across my face. The blow knocks me backward, and almost immediately, I feel the wetness dripping down my face.
“I always thought you were a fucking bitch. You know that? A tramp who was all talk, probably never put out and just talked her shit, like she was some tough girl. Well, it doesn’t look like you’re so tough right now, does it?”
I don’t answer him, which makes him more agitated.
“I asked you a QUESTION! ANSWER ME!” he screams, slamming the gun back across my cheek. I’m trying to speak, but I’m shaking so bad, and the dizziness is causing a delay in my thought process.
“F-Frank, p-p-put the gun d-down. If you j-just give m-m-me my phone, I’ll call right n-now and tell them I lied,” I chatter in fear through my tears. “I swear. I c-can f-fix this.” There is a small glimmer of hope when I see him take a second to process my suggestion. Please give me my phone. Please…
“You just think I’m some dumb asshole, don’t you?”
“No,” I whisper in argument. “F-Frank, I don’t. P-Please…”
“YOU DO!” He lifts up his gun, and I take that moment to run. I know I can make it to the door and open it and scream for help. “FUCKING GET BACK HERE!” His roar echoes so loud that I can feel the floor rattle. I’m so close when he tackles me. The sound of a gunshot fills the room as we go down. We land on top of a table, my face crashing into the corner. I feel something slice into me, and the guttural sounds of pain erupt from me.
“You bitch! Look what you’ve done!” I hear Frank’s voice, but it’s far away. I managed to shield my stomach once again from the fall, but when I pull my hands away, I see blood. Lots of blood.
My baby.
Please not the baby.
I’m so sorry, Molly.
I flip through the next page of the scrapbook my mom made of me as a baby. “And how long did it take you to make this?” The detail is insane. Nothing my attention span could handle.
“Oh, not long. Once you get into it, it’s really enjoyable. Trust me. When you have kids, you’ll make one for your little girl or boy.”
I look at my mom and roll my eyes. “No, thanks. I don’t plan on having kids.”
She looks at me tenderly, knowing the aftermath of her mishaps have had a huge effect on me.
“Baby, yes you will. You might see things a little cloudy now, but one day, you will find love. And you will have a child and it will be the most beautiful thing you can ever imagine.”
“Kinda like how you found love?” I ask dryly. “No, thanks.”
She brushes my hair behind my shoulders and begins braiding it as I shuffle through more decorative pages of myself as a child.
“Honey, love comes in all shapes and sizes. Sometimes it’s messy and sometimes it can be the most rewarding thing imaginable. As is having a child of your own. You were a miracle to me, kiddo. And you always will be my heart. One day, when you have one of your own, which you will, you will understand.”
I turn back to my mom, giving her my best teenage eye roll. “Whatever you say, weirdo.”
She offers me her motherly wink and finishes braiding my hair. “I love you, Andie. Always remember that.”
“I love you too, Mom.”
I Should Have Been There to Protect Her
“MOLLY,” I SAY ALOUD, TESTING the name again on my tongue. A stupid grin is permanently affixed on my face. We’re having a little girl. Molly. My smile falls when I look up at the clock. It’s been forty-five minutes, and Andie still hasn’t returned.
Me: Stop trying to pack up the entire apartment, beautiful. We’ll get it done this weekend. Hurry back. I miss you.
Ignoring the unease settling in the pit of my belly, I focus on straightening the house. I’ve already cleaned up all the glass and stolen a lamp from the guest room to put in the living room until I can replace the broken one. Another fifteen minutes come and go.
Me: Babe. Call me.
I don’t wait even five minutes before I dial her number.
“This is Andie,” she chirps on her voicemail. “You know what to do.”
“Call me when you get this. I’m trying not to go caveman on you, but if you don’t call me back in five minutes, I’m hunting you down, woman.” I sigh and run my fingers through my hair. “Seriously, though…I need you to call me back. I love you.”
I can imagine her smirking and saying, “I know,” back to me as I hang up the phone. I’m still pacing in the living room when my phone starts ringing.
“Jesus, Andie,” I grunt out as I answer. “You scared me when you didn’t answer—”
“R-Roman.” The voice on the other end is so choked with tears, it takes me a second to realize it’s Dani and not Andie.
“What’s wrong? Is Ram okay?”
“R-Ram’s fine…” A pained noise comes from her throat. No. Jesus, no. “It’s Andie.”
Ice trickles through my veins, and I become hyperaware of every passing second.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
Don’t say it, Dani.
Whatever it is that’s about to come out of your mouth, don’t fucking say it.
“No.” My voice is a whisper but it’s also a goddamned command.
“H-He…I know it was him…”
“Who?” I hiss out. “Dani, who?”
“Frank.”
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
“What about Frank?”
“H-He must have f-f-followed her inside the apartment and—” A wail echoes on the other end and it chills me to the bone. “I’m her emergency c-contact. Th-They took her to the hospital and—”
I snag my keys and bolt out the door. “Is she alive?”
“They wouldn’t tell me much,” she chokes out. “Oh God! I can’t lose my best friend!”
Molten fury bubbles up within me. That fucking Frank bastard hurt my woman. If I wasn’t so worried about her and Molly, I would hunt down that sick psycho and slit his throat from ear to ear.
“Call Ram. Get him to take you to the hospital. Text me if you get any information,” I bark out, fighting furiously to keep my rage at bay. I can’t go flying off the handle on a m
urder mission. Andie needs me. “And call her brother too.”
I hang up and climb into the Range Rover. Our new house is on the outskirts of town in a suburb, so I’ll have to haul ass to make it to the hospital in a timely manner. With a screech, I peel out of our driveway and nearly take out an old couple walking their dog. The old man scowls at me. Well fuck him too. Andie needs me, goddammit.
My chest aches as though someone has tried to carve my heart out with a rusty spoon. I can’t lose her or the baby. We’re a family. A motherfucking family.
“FUUUUCK!” I roar and slam my fist on the steering wheel.
Had I just manned the fuck up and drove her to the apartment, I could have protected her. I was so stupid drunk on love for her and Molly that I completely forgot about Frank.
I should have been there to protect her.
My phone starts ringing, and I mash the Bluetooth button on my steering wheel.
“What?” I bark.
“Oh, sweetie,” Mom cries out. “Is she okay?”
Tears burn at my eyes, and I furiously rub at them to keep from crying. I will not cry. I will be strong for my family. “Momma…” A tear tries to escape, but I smudge it away. “I don’t know.”
“I’ll meet you at the hospital. Dani called me absolutely hysterical. Try to stay calm until we know what’s happened,” Mom tells me.
I punch my steering wheel and bellow, “I know what happened! I didn’t keep her and our baby safe!”
“Shhh,” Mom coos. “Honey, this is not your fault. Please calm down. You need to drive safe, son.”
But I can’t calm down. The seconds are ticking away faster now, tick, tick, tick, and I’m going fucking crazy. I won’t even begin to relax until Andie is in my arms and she’s safe. Mom continues to talk in hushed tones like she used to do when we were upset as children. It doesn’t fucking work anymore. My heart is being torn from my chest with every second that passes.
“I’m here. Gotta go,” I snap and hang up.
When I pull into the hospital parking lot, I barely put it in park in a spot before I’m sprinting toward the building. I run in through the emergency room entrance and storm over to the attendant.
“May I help you, sir?”
“Andrea Miller. Pregnant. Just brought in here. I need to see her!” I practically yell at the poor woman with eyes wide as saucers.
“Sir,” she tries, holding a palm up to me, “I need you to calm down—”
“WHY IS EVERYONE TELLING ME TO CALM THE FUCK DOWN?!” I roar at her and kick the pillar beside the desk. “I CAN’T CALM THE FUCK DOWN BECAUSE I DON’T KNOW IF SHE IS OKAY OR NOT!”
The girl, clearly new and unable to handle my tone, bursts into tears as she picks up the phone with a shaky hand. Normally, I’d feel bad about making some chick cry but right now as her lip wobbles and she questions someone on the line, I don’t feel sorry for her. There is no room in my heart for anything but Andie and Molly.
Please, dear God, let them be okay.
“Sir, it appears that she is here, but the doctors are assessing her now. I’m sorry but that’s all the information I have right now—”
I stalk past her when someone exits the locked double doors and shove through them on a hunt for Andie. The woman hollers from behind me before finally I hear her yell, “Security!”
This puts a pep in my step, and I run like I used to back in college. When I had the ball and all those big fuckers were after me. I only had one goal: get the ball to the finish line. And now, as I dart past angry nurses and confused doctors, I still have one goal: get to my family. I see a flash of a black uniform from the corner of my eye, so I take off in the other direction.
“Andie!” I yell as I run past each room. “Andie!”
When she doesn’t answer me back, I stall and let out a choked sound. Please be okay. Please be fucking okay.
Two strong hands grab my biceps from behind. “You are not allowed to be back here. Let’s go,” the man grumbles.
I jerk out of his grip and stalk back in the direction I came from. “I can walk without your help, asshole.”
He escorts me back out to the waiting room where the red-faced attendant refuses to make eye contact with me. The security officer points to a metal chair. “Sit there and don’t move. When there’s information, you’ll be informed immediately.”
Defeat overwhelms me, and I crumple into the chair.
Andie, baby, please be okay.
“What do we know?” Linc demands as soon as he sees me upon entering the waiting area. “Where’s my sister?”
I scrub my face with my palm and let out a ragged sigh. I’ve been here at least another forty-five minutes. “I don’t know. No word yet.”
An older guy trots in after him with a grim look on his face. “You Roman?”
The guy looks familiar but I can’t place his face. “Yeah.”
“Roger Miller,” he says with a tip of his head. “Andrea’s father.”
I’m taken aback for just a moment until two uniformed officers stroll over. “Are you Andrea Miller’s family?”
I bounce out of my chair and stride over to them. Linc and Roger file in beside me. “Is she okay? This stupid hospital won’t tell us anything!”
The female officer pales slightly and frowns. “Frank Gillson has been apprehended and taken into police custody for the assault and battery of Andrea Miller. He’s also being charged with breaking and entering, assault with a deadly weapon, and attempted murder. An eyewitness found him behind the building in a hysterical, suicidal state. They were able to retrieve his gun and restrain him until we arrived. His statement alone is enough to prosecute him, but we’d like to ask you all a few questions as well.”
Someone is growling like a goddamned mountain lion.
Roger touches my shoulder. “Calm down, son.”
The growls are coming from me.
“That motherfucker,” I snarl. “I’m going to kill him.”
“Duuude,” Linc grumbles. “Not a cool thing to say in front of two cops.” He shakes his head.
“He’s just shaken up,” Roger offers in my defense to the cops. “What is the report on what happened?”
Again the female’s face turns ghostly white. “I won’t sugar-coat it. The scene was graphic. There was a lot of blood loss from both the victim and the assailant. While the assailant’s wounds seem to be superficial, the victim left the scene unconscious.”
I stumble back as the room spins. “B-But she’s okay, right?”
The female cop forces a smile. “As far as we know, she left the scene in stable condition, but you’ll have to get more information on her status from the doctors. I’m sorry.”
“The baby?” I question.
She winces. “I don’t know.”
My mother bursts through the door and makes a beeline for me. As soon as she wraps her arms around me, I feel myself starting to break. I can’t do this. I can’t wait around for zero goddamned answers.
“Momma,” I whisper, the waiting room blurring around me from unshed tears.
She helps me to my chair while Linc and Roger continue talking to the officers. I let my mother fuss over me. I’m told Dani is in quite a state, and that Ram was trying to get her to compose herself before they came inside. Everything she says seems to go in one ear and out the other. I feel as though my body is beginning to numb one cell at a time.
“She’s going to be okay,” she tells me and kisses my forehead, which reminds me of when I was a kid.
“I love her,” I choke out. “I fucking love her.”
She sniffles. “I know, baby. I know.”
“Are you the family of Andrea Miller?” A tired looking doctor questions from the doorway.
I bolt from my seat and storm over to him. “Is she okay? What about the baby?” I demand.
“Are you a relative?”
“I’m her goddamned boyfriend!” I bellow.
Irritation washes over his features.
�
��I’m her father. You can tell us what happened,” Roger tells him firmly and once again clutches my shoulder in a supportive manner. It reminds me of my dad, and for a split second, I almost smile. But then I remember I’m in my worst fucking nightmare and growl instead.
“I’m Dr. Chisolm. Andrea is a lucky woman,” he says as he scratches his jaw. “I’ll be honest. Things looked pretty bleak when she arrived. She was covered in multiple contusions, was unresponsive, and was bleeding heavily from her face.”
I shudder and my knees buckle. Roger grabs my bicep to keep me from collapsing.
“And…” I choke out.
“But after we got her in there and really started assessing her, most of her injuries were superficial. We were able to stitch up most of them fairly easily. It was her nose that required the most attention. I’m fairly certain, though, that she’ll be able to heal normally from the break without plastic surgery, but only time will tell. She has some swelling and it looks a lot worse than it is right now. Don’t be alarmed when you see her,” he tells us.
“So she’s okay?” I clarify. “And our baby?”
“We assessed the baby and everything is fine. However, we’re going to need to observe her overnight to make sure there wasn’t any distress to the fetus. We’ll know more in the morning.”
“I need to see her—”
“Only immediate family can go back—”
“Son,” Roger tells me in a firm tone, “I will go to her. We’ll make sure you get back to see her, and I’ll keep you apprised of her state just as soon as I’m able to.”
The doctor nods at her father. “Come with me.”
I stand there like a fucking idiot. I’m not her family according to the worst hospital on the planet. She’s carrying my daughter inside her, and I’m not fucking family. As soon as I get her out of here and in my arms, I’ll change that pretty damn quick. Another day will not go by where she isn’t considered my family, both legally and by the heart.
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