Through the whirl of people, I finally found my driver. He grabbed my bags, greeted me, and showed me to the car. I got in the car while the driver put my bags in the trunk. I slouched down in the seat and leaned on the door. Doesn’t matter how many times I come home, I’m never prepared to be here. I’ve become accustomed to my life in Georgia and being home just reminded me of hard times.
When I lived here before going to college, I wasn’t allowed to go anywhere without supervision. Even then, it was only to select places; none of which I had any interest in. I could have gone to college here, but that would have been too close for comfort. I finally got a chance to get away and I never wanted to return. Especially when I met Jamie and Rachel at school. Most of our classes were together the first year and after that, we were inseparable. The only reason I’m here now is because I had to come twice a year for examinations.
We pulled up in the drive way and I looked across the lawn, dreading to go in. I pulled it together and got out of the car. I walked up the steps and rang the doorbell. I was never given a key. My father said the only way I would get one is if I paid a bill in the house. It wasn’t that important for me, so I blew that conversation off, like so many others. I laughed to myself when the butler finally answered the door. Abracadabra, I thought. My father was such an idiot.
“Mr. Dean, how was your flight?” He greeted me.
“How many times have I asked you to call me Ash? I hate it when you call me Mr. Dean. You’ve known me all my life.”
“Sorry sir.”
I sighed and rolled my eyes.
“The flight was okay, I guess,” I said stretching, “Where are the white coats?”
“Your father is around back in the lab.”
“Thanks,” I said turning away from him.
I walked to the kitchen and grabbed some bottled water then headed to the back.
The corridor always seemed creepy to me. It was a long white hall that was very narrow. The hall led to the lab and only had sensor lights on the floor. You really couldn’t see anything until you walked close to the sensor for the light to come on. It was always pitch black.
When I made it to the end of the hallway, I stood at the door and knocked. I heard someone walking to the door on the other side. Finally the door opened.
“Ashton, it’s so good to see you,” my father said.
“Hey father,” I replied.
He hugged me and I still wasn’t all that happy to see him. His face seemed weary, but he did seem happy to see me.
“So where’s mom?” I said pulling away from the hug.
“She had to step out to run some errands, but she should be back shortly.”
I nodded and walked further into the lab. It looked like a lot of things had changed since I was here last. There was obviously more equipment added.
The lab was actually huge. It was sectioned off to accommodate the procedures that took place, as well as an area for my father’s office.
My father was a doctor and a scientist and like all scientists, in my opinion, he was insane. I figure that’s the reason they discover so many things, because they are crazy enough to try.
He and his partner, Dr. Lewis, had experimented on so many things, it’s a wonder they haven’t found a way to live on Saturn or how to teach pigs to fly. His knowledge of the things unknown to me was a bore. I never took an interest in any of his work, and I think that upsets him.
I wasn’t one to take things as seriously as he did. My philosophy was, you only live once, so have as much fun as you can before you go.
While I walked around the lab, I could feel my father staring at me. I know he wanted to flood me with questions like he always did. For some reason, I felt like being a jerk today. I wanted him to wait until I was done looking at all the changes made to the place where I spent most of my childhood.
There was a door in the back of the lab that led to an extra room. I never asked what it was for and I’ve never been in there. I could care less what it contained.
I walked around the operating table that was in the far corner and looked up to notice my dad still staring.
“So, how do you feel son?” he asked.
Once again, I rolled my eyes. I noticed I was doing that too often. Note to self: stop hanging around Jamie and Rach so much.
“I’m okay. I feel fine.”
“Have there been any changes since your last visit?”
“No, not really. I’ve been tired more lately, but other than that, I’m okay,” I said.
“Tired? Are you sleeping more or are you just feeling worn out?” he said grabbing a pad and pen.
He knew exactly how to push my buttons and make me mad. He was starting in on me already and I just walked through the door. I wasn’t in the mood for any of his endless questioning and the dissection of my answers.
“Do we have to do this right now? I just walked through the door and you can’t wait to put me on the operating table,” I said.
He frowned and then put the pen and pad down.
“You’re right, it can wait,” he said walking towards me. “Let’s go to the main house and catch up.”
I was reluctant at first, but I followed him out of the lab.
My dad walked in front of me, but that wasn’t anything new. We never walked side by side. I was always bothered by it, but I never said anything.
Another thing that bothered me was the fact he was being so nice and patient with me. Normally he would talk at me and not with me. It made me feel like he was hiding something important; something he was too afraid to tell me.
He was very loquacious today. I stared at the back of his head while he walked through the kitchen to the living room, listening to him ramble on.
“Hey doc,” I yelled.
He stopped short while spinning around on his heels.
“Yes son,” he said, startled.
“What’s going on? There’s something you’re not telling me,” I asked.
He started laughing nervously. “What do you mean?”
“You’re rambling. Did something happen?”
I knew something was going on about me because if it were about someone else, he would have told me by now.
“No son, everything is going to be fine.”
“Going to be? What…” I said.
“Ashton,” my mom said coming through the door cutting me off.
She ran up to me and gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek. My dad and I were still staring at each other.
“I’ve missed you. How have you been?” my mom said, examining me. “Look at you, did you get taller?”
“No, I don’t believe I did,” I said.
After she looked me up and down, she made an uneasy face and then glanced at my father. Something was seriously going on here. My mom grabbed my arm and pulled me to the couch.
“Come talk to me. How are things? How do you feel honey?” she asked.
My father gave my mom a skittish look, but she ignored it. For some reason I wasn’t upset with my mom.
“I’m okay, everything is great,” I said.
“He’s been lethargic lately,” my father added.
“I didn’t say lethargic, I said tired. In my opinion, they are two different things,” I yelled.
“Sorry son.”
My mom looked back and forth between my father and me. Apparently, she felt she needed to defuse the situation.
“Are you hungry? Have you eaten yet?” she said looking at me. “Let’s go out and have a nice family dinner.”
“Sure mom, let me go get cleaned up and I’ll be down in a minute.”
I got up and headed for the winding staircase. I was still uneasy about the conversation that just took place. I was going to let it go for now, but I was dead set on getting some answers.
After I changed, I went downstairs and my parents were already at the door waiting on me. I stopped halfway down the stairs because they were huddled together whispering. To no avail, I strained
to hear what was going on.
I was starting to get worried. This was scaring me, because my parents have never been this tense before.
I quietly walked down the rest of the way to see if I could get closer and hear what they were saying. I still didn’t get anything and now I was too close for them to not notice me.
“Are you ready Ashton?” my mom asked.
“Yep,” I replied, walking passed them to the door.
We made our way to the car and got inside. The ride to the restaurant was silent. There was no music played or any delightful conversation, just awkward glances exchanged between my parents. I was glad when we finally pulled up to the valet. I opened the door quickly so I could hear some chatter from somewhere, anywhere. The muted ride almost drove me insane.
Dinner was just as dreadful. There wasn’t much chatter there, as well. No one wanted to start up a conversation and so we ate in silence then hurried the waiter up with the check. I wasn’t the only one that wanted this evening to be over.
Once we made it back home, I walked in the house waiting for someone to tell me something. My mom came through the door, put up her coat and immediately stood next to the stairs.
Finally, my mom kissed me on the cheek, with a worried look in her eyes, before she ascended up the stairs to her room. My father paced back and forth while we watched my mom until she disappeared around the corner. My father stopped pacing and turned to me.
“Okay, seriously, what is going on?” I asked.
He had a grimaced look on his face. I knew right then he wasn’t going to tell me anything.
“Son, maybe you should get some rest, and I’ll explain everything in the morning,” he said.
“How do you expect me to sleep when I know something is going on? And I know it’s about me because if it wasn’t, you would’ve told me by now.” I was fuming.
“I know son, please calm down. I promise it will all make sense in the morning. Please just trust me.”
This conversation was going nowhere fast. I was too angry to speak, so I turned and headed up to my room.
When I got to my room, I slammed the door so hard, the walls shook. I was so mad, I just started picking up random things and throwing them against the wall. I use to feel safe whenever I came in here, but now, it didn’t help shield me from the feeling I had gnawing at me. My father was avoiding my questions and my mom was being insanely nice to me. It was eating me up.
I continued to throw whatever I could get my hands on, but I still felt like crap. I gave up and sat down on my bed and looked around at the mess I made. My mom would be pissed if she saw how I trashed my room.
I remember arguing with my father so many times about the fact that I felt like I was in a prison. In exchange for my good behavior, I got to revamp my room. Since I didn’t go anywhere, I brought some of the outside world into my room. My mom helped me find all the things I needed. It would kill her to see that I broke some of the things she found for me.
I laid back on my bed and looked at my phone. I wanted to call Jamie, but I figured she was asleep by now. I put the phone down. I started to get sleepy. I let go of my quest to find something to do and made myself go to sleep.
The next morning I arose to the aroma of breakfast. It couldn't have been my mom because I have never seen her in the kitchen cooking ever. She claimed she never learned how to cook properly, but I think she just says that so she won't be asked.
I jumped out of bed and threw on a t-shirt and some pajama pants. I went in the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. After I was done, I headed downstairs.
When I hit the bottom of the stairs, my mom was there in the front room waiting to greet me.
“Hey honey, how did you sleep?” she asked.
“Okay,” I replied.
“Good. Are you hungry? Heidi cooked you a big breakfast.”
“Yeah, I'm starved. Where's your husband?” I said with a slight smile. I know my mom hates it when I say that.
“Don't start this morning. You know your father really loves you. I don't understand why you give him such a hard time.”
“I'm just kidding,” I said walking toward the kitchen. “I'm gonna get something to eat.”
“Okay dear.”
My father must have left early, obviously avoiding the talk he promised we would have. I couldn't think of anything else, I needed to know what was going on.
My mind kept wandering. I picked up a plate and started packing it with everything. What had my parents so jittery that my mom was on the edge and my father ducking and dodging me?
What if I was dying? Nah, that couldn't be it. I was in the best shape of my life. I always ate right and exercised, and I don't smoke or drink. That couldn't be it. I still couldn't put my finger on it though. I was hoping my father would clear that up for me real soon.
After breakfast, I went upstairs, took a shower and got dressed for the day. When I made it back downstairs, I noticed my mom had disappeared somewhere and I still hadn't seen my father.
I walked to the lab to see if he was there. I knocked on the door and waited for what seemed like forever. I leaned my head against the door to listen for some movement, instead I heard a female crying. Then another door shut.
Who the hell was that? It didn't sound like mom, but it was definitely a girl. I wondered what my father had going on in there. I knocked again. This time he answered.
“Good morning son,” he said blocking the door.
I tried to look around him, but the door was cracked and he was shielding the space with his body.
“Was there a girl in there crying?” I asked.
“I don't know what you're talking about. There is no one in here but me,” he responded with an uneasy tone in his voice.
“I thought I heard someone crying. Are you sure there's no one else in there?”
“Yes, I'm sure. Is there anything you need son?”
“I need to talk to you. Can we talk now?”
“Uh, sure,” he said looking behind him, “give me a minute in here to get things straightened up and I'll meet you in the main house. Wait for me there.”
I wanted to bust through the door and see what was going on. I knew I wasn't hearing things. Someone else was in there and he was standing here lying to my face about it. I didn't know where I was anymore. This has turned into the house of horrors, filled with lies, secrets, and deceit.
“Okay, I'll wait, but we are gonna talk, right?”
“We are going to talk, I promise,” he said.
I let it go and walked back to the main house. When I got to the living room, I yelled for my mom.
“Yes dear,” she said coming around the corner from the library.
“What's going on in the lab? I heard a girl crying in there.”
“What are you talking about? No one is in there other than your dad. I just talked to him not too long ago.”
“This is crazy! You guys must think I was born yesterday. Someone needs to tell me something right now.”
I heard the door shut around the corner and my mom jumped. She seemed just as uneasy as my father was.
“Son, have a seat,” my father said as he came to stand in front of me.
I looked back and forth between him and my mom. I wanted to lash out, but I knew it wouldn’t do any good. I just needed to calm down and listen to what they had to say. At least they were about to talk to me.
I took a seat on the sofa and my parents sat across from me near the fireplace. Once again, there was silence, just as it had been since yesterday.
My father cleared his throat and grabbed my mom’s hand. She looked at him, nodded and then they both turned to me.
“Well, I know you have a lot of questions about why we’re acting different. There is a simple explanation, but I wanted to do the examination first just to know for sure before I alarmed you,” he said.
“I don’t understand. Why do I need an examination before you can tell me what’s going on?”
“Well, dear,” my mom chimed in, “we just want to make sure everything is fine with you before we burden you with something that might be unnecessary.”
“Okay, but that still doesn’t answer my question. Can you just spit it out please? I’m a grown man. Whatever it is, I can handle it.”
Silence again.
“Okay… there is no easy way to say this… so I’m just going to come right out and say it.” He paused. “We have been doing research and we have reason to believe that your health might start declining within the next year or so,” my father said. “But like I said I want to run some test on you because it might be nothing. I don’t know for sure right now.”
I leaned back in my seat and took a deep breath. This can’t be right, can it? My father was staring at me, searching. No one said anything for a couple of minutes.
“So, you’re saying what, that I might die soon?” I asked.
“No, no that’s not what we’re saying. But I do want to be on the safe side and take the necessary precautions. Once I get your test results back, we’ll have a better idea of what we’re dealing with and how to fix the problem,” he said.
“Problem? I need you to be more specific. Like what are we dealing with? My health is going to decline, but I’m not going to die. How do you even know about this? What else are you not telling me?”
“Son, let me just do the exam and go from there. You might not have anything to worry about.”
I couldn’t grasp what he was telling me. My health will start fading. I’m about to die, I just know it. This was not fair.
I looked up at my parents and my mom was crying now. My father was comforting her. The room started to spin. My father told me years ago that I didn’t have anything to worry about. Now, I don’t know how long I have to live. I know that’s what they are not telling me. I guess I understand though. It has to be hard to have to tell your kid they are dying.
My mom got up and came to sit next to me. She hugged me so tight and I returned the hug in the same manner. My father finally made his way over and sat on the other side. He wrapped his arms around both of us and we stayed there for over an hour.
When we finally got all the tears and hugs out of the way, my father asked me if I was ready to take the exam. I didn’t know how to answer the question. On one hand, he was asking a very simple question and yet, on the other hand he was asking me if I was ready to hear my fate.
More Than One: A Novel Page 8