by B. L. Purser
As we had agreed upon, we were also never seen together in public. This would be crossing into a relationship that neither of us needed. Some could argue that we were already in a relationship, but we both rationalized that it was more of a working arrangement. Since no one knew of our agreement, I was able to work at B.I. with no recourse from my co-workers. Life seemed more manageable than it had in a long time.
Aiden always felt the need to tie me up. Most of the time, the binding consisted of wrist and ankle restraints. These restraints were mainly cloth in material, and they never left marks. However, on occasion, he had also experimented with blindfolds, whips, and handcuffs. While the whips were somewhat enjoyable, I did not like the blindfold or handcuffs. They were just a little too intense for my taste. After expressing this to him, he gladly put those items away. While he liked to play, he wanted me to enjoy the experience too.
I knew that this was a fetish for him, and he needed it. Interestingly, I also enjoyed it immensely. While meeting his need for control, it allowed me the opportunity to give up control in a safe environment. This contradicted what I thought I wanted above all other things. However, I soon realized that I had a need I hadn’t counted on.
For years, I searched high and low for ways to remain in control over every aspect of my life. I demanded control and stopped at nothing to get it. It was the only thing that seemed important. What I didn’t realize, is maintaining control of all things is utterly exhausting. It consumes my every thought and makes me fight for every piece of my life.
Allowing Aiden to take control of our sex life had become a stress reliever for me. Since he takes control, I can let go and relax. With him, I do not worry. However, he is the only person that I would ever let take the reins for a while, both figuratively and literally.
As I finished getting ready for work, my brain continued working through all the aspects of my new life. Just as I was about to head out of my apartment, my cell phone rang. Since I had only given my number to a few people, I knew it must be Aiden. This was confirmed when I glanced at the image on the screen. He very rarely calls me in the morning, during the week, so I hoped nothing was wrong.
Chapter 23
- Aiden
“Good morning Cam. I hope you are doing well this morning.”
I waited for her response before continuing.
“Good morning Aiden. I am well, is everything okay? You don’t usually call this early on weekdays.”
I could hear the worry in her voice, so I quickly put her mind at ease.
“Everything is great. Actually, I am calling with good news. It looks like I may be taking another trip soon. You remember the situation that we encountered in Cozumel, well it looks like I have a similar issue to deal with in Texas. Although it is not near as exotic as Cozumel, I could really use your help. You proved to be a tremendous asset on the last trip. Would you consider traveling with me?”
Normally, I loathed the idea of having to travel. However, the thought of Cam coming too made the trip much more appealing. I continued before she had a chance to answer.
“You would have similar responsibilities as you did last time. This corporate location and manufacturing plant develops and builds several types of kitchen appliances. While it certainly won’t be as luxurious as Cozumel, it may offer a few tourist opportunities.
“If you have never been to Dallas, I can assure you the view of the skyline at night is breathtaking. I happen to have a direct view of it from my apartment there.”
As I was describing this to her, I could envision having her naked body pressed against the massive apartment window. I needed to get my thoughts under control, or I would be taking the walk of shame up to my office this morning. I guess it is a good thing that I had my own private entrance.
“Sure, I would love to go. Besides, you’re the boss. You know you don’t have to ask my permission, Aiden.”
Her remark stung slightly. I had always taken great measures to avoid being that person with her. I hope she understood how much her happiness meant to me. Somewhere along the line, the smile on her face had become as important to me as the sex was.
“Cam, I hope you know I would never ask you to do anything you didn’t want to do. I just want you to be happy.”
My voice had changed somewhat with my last remark. It had grown quieter and more reserved. Her reply informed me that she had picked up on it too.
“Aiden, I was only teasing. I haven’t smiled in a long, long time until meeting you. Don’t take my teasing to heart. Do I need to break into your secret lair at B.I. and show you how happy you make me? You know I am unstoppable when it comes to trying to get my point across.”
The playfulness in her words and the lust-filled offer soothed my hurt feelings. If she only knew what the thought of having her in my office at B.I. did to me. I had fantasized many times about having her there. In fact, I had come close to acting on it a few of those times. However, I knew that if I started that, I would likely not be able to stop it. Then, it would become a noticeable trend, and our closely guarded secret would be revealed.
“As much as I enjoy picturing you in a black cat suit sneaking past security cameras and putting the sleeper-hold on my security guards, it would take none of that to reach me. You were given clearance to my floor months ago. If you ever need or want to see me, all you have to do is scan your badge in the elevator.”
The silence told me more than words would have. She didn’t know how to take this new information. I hoped it was not too much for her to handle. I really hadn’t planned on telling her unless she had hinted at wanting to come to my office. I’m not sure if playfully suggesting that she break in was the hint that I was waiting on.
“Cam are you overthinking this.”
Her awkward giggle provided a small amount of comfort.
“I’m not sure Aiden. My rapid heartbeat is either from your information or the fact that while listening to it, I was so distracted I stepped into traffic and almost got hit by one of those bat-out-of-hell taxis. Give me a minute to catch my breath.”
After a few seconds she spoke again, “okay, I’m better. I’m not going to overthink it. If the opportunity presents itself I may pay you a visit one day. It’s nice knowing I have that option. Just don’t count on me using it.”
This was the answer I was looking for. Now, I knew that she would only visit if she were comfortable doing so. Cam had become a light in my dark world, and I didn’t want to change that by pushing her. No, things were going great, and I wanted to keep it that way.
“Agreed. Now, I will let you go so you don’t get plastered by another taxi. I have a late meeting this evening. I don’t know if I will get home before you are in bed. If I do, I will text you. If not, we will plan on getting together tomorrow.”
I listened as she agreed to the plan, and we said our goodbyes.
It seemed that the day drug on forever. I wasn’t sure if it was the realization that I might not get to see Cam this evening or the monotony of my business. For some reason, I just couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that something was wrong. I hoped that she was honest in her promise to not overthink my offer. I didn’t want to scare her. After all, things were going so well.
Still, something seemed off with her today. To the normal person, she would seem fine. However, I had grown to know her so well. The few times that I had glanced at her on the security cameras, I could tell something was wrong. Her eyes gave it away. There was trouble and worry that I had not seen in a long time. Damn it!! I had screwed up. I needed to figure out a way to smooth this over so she didn’t feel overwhelmed by me.
- Cam
A second after Aiden and I ended our call, my cell phone rang again. Figuring that he had forgotten to tell me something, I answered with a smart remark.
“Is the big boss of B.I. getting forgetful?”
I suddenly realized I had been wrong when a deep voice replied, “I’m sorry; I’m trying to reach Ms. Camilla Anderson. Are you
Ms. Anderson?”
After confirming that I was indeed Ms. Anderson, I listened carefully to what the caller had to say.
When the conversation had ended, I hung up the phone in a daze. It all came slamming back to me with an intensity that knocked the breath from my lungs. I had hoped this day would never come, but in the back of my mind, I knew it would. I had to go back… My past had found me and instantly stole all of the comforts that I’d somewhat gained since my time in New York. It was all over. I could not run anymore.
My mind automatically traveled to thoughts of Aiden. He had helped to make my life bearable since our meeting. He never expected or wanted more from me than I could give, and time with him had become easier than time alone. Considering my aversion to relationships and commitments, this was saying a lot. Although I still felt strongly about having ties to no one, I couldn’t ignore the twinge that I felt knowing that I was leaving.
I worked the entire day on auto-pilot. I couldn’t remember who I talked to or what I had done. As I finally trudged into my lovely apartment, I reminisced about the day’s activities. I hoped that I had not absolutely bombed my last day at B.I., but I couldn’t be certain. Throughout the day, every time I blinked, images of Aiden at various times played as a slideshow through my mind. I knew that I owed him an explanation. I only hoped that a written one would suffice. After all, I knew it was the only way I could possibly get out what I needed to say. I grabbed a piece of legal paper from my satchel and began to scratch out my note.
Dear Aiden,
I know this letter may come as a surprise to you. In actuality, it was not one that I had hoped to be writing anytime soon. Unfortunately, my life has turned in yet another abysmal direction, and I can no longer hide from my past. By the time you read this, I will no longer be in New York.
Understand that I will forever be indebted for the contentment you provided me with during our arrangement. I only hope that the benefits you gained if any were larger than the sacrifices you made.
I would love to say with certainty that I could return. However, certainty doesn’t exist in my life. Plus after what I have to do, I doubt I would be of much use to you. Therefore, I am asking you to expunge my contractual obligations.
I truly wish you’d been given the life you deserved, Aiden. I know that love and happily-ever-afters do not exist in our world. We see the illusion for what it is. However, I am not convinced that this knowledge is empowering. It seems to have only worked to feed our iniquities.
I wish you the best.
~ Cam
I sealed the envelope containing the somber letter. It had been harder to write than I ever thought possible. At that moment, my future looked as bleak as my past.
I packed what was left of me into my two familiar suitcases and made sure the apartment was in the same shape it had been when I became the tenant. I had called the airline immediately following the reprehensible phone call. Luckily, the last flight of the day still had seats available. My flight would leave in two hours. I had just enough time to deliver the letter and make it to the airport.
I rode the elevator up to Aiden’s apartment. I figured that he would not be home from B.I. yet because of his late meeting. If there was ever a good time to do what I was about to do, this was it. I left my luggage in the elevator and entered his apartment. The lack of the intense electrical charge confirmed that I had guessed correctly. He had not gotten home yet. The atmosphere and smell brought back a flood of memories making it hard to breath. I entered his office and immediately wished I hadn’t. Images of what we had done on his desk flashed through my mind. Before I allowed myself time to back out, I quickly placed the letter along with my cell phone and apartment key on the desk. I practically ran back to the elevator trying not to allow my senses the opportunity to function. After a quick ride down in the elevator, I was situated in a taxi on my way to the airport. I leaned my head back on the headrest and tried hard to shut my brain down. Of course, I was unsuccessful.
Chapter 24
- Aiden
It had been a hell of an evening. The hostile atmosphere of my late meeting had me still fuming. As if that wasn’t enough, my mind could only think about tabling the meeting so I could make it home in enough time to take a reasonably late swim with Cam. There was so much I wanted to say to her. I hoped that I could smooth over our morning conversation and get things back to the way they had been prior to my stupid revelation. Well, that wasn’t going to happen now either. Cam was probably already asleep in the comfort of her nice warm bed. What I wouldn’t give to feel her body pressed against mine right now. But there was no way in hell I was going to wake her up just for a late night booty call. It would have to wait until a more convenient time. A very soon more convenient time.
As I exited the car at my apartment, my phone buzzed. I secretly hoped that Cam had actually waited up sensing that I needed her. I was disappointed when I saw Dean’s name on my screen.
“This better be damn good Dean,” I hissed into the phone. I had no idea that my night was about to get a hell of a lot worse.
“Sorry to bother you this late Mr. Bennett, but I have some information that I felt like I might need to share with you before morning.”
I couldn’t imagine what would possess Dean to think something was important enough to call me this late.
“Well, spit it out Dean. I don’t have the time or energy to play twenty questions with you.” At this point, I was not even trying to keep the anger from my voice.
“Uh, right. Um, this evening Cam went to your apartment for a very brief period...”
He paused and I wondered if this was the information he felt I had to know before morning.
“Okay, considering I granted her access to my apartment, I wouldn’t think that’s reason for alarm, Dean. She may have left something there and needed to retrieve it. She may have wanted to determine if the dick-size rumor was true and snuck in to see what size shoe I wear…”
The shit was obviously about to hit the fan. If I couldn’t trust his judgment regarding events, I sure as hell didn’t need him. Sensing that I was about to blow, he cut into my tyrant.
“Mr. Bennett I would not have called you if that is all that happened. After leaving your apartment, Ms. Anderson went straight to the airport. It took me all this time to find someone that I could bribe to tell me where she was going. She flew to Georgia sir; Atlanta to be precise.”
My mind suddenly went blank, and all of the words that I was about to blast Dean with vanquished. He filled the silence with the rest of his explanation.
“I do not have a clue as to where she is going once she gets to Atlanta. Since she got a jump on me, I wanted to see if you may know. I am assuming you still want me to follow her.”
I didn’t know what to think. I had no clue where she could be. The only thing I knew is that she had spent enough time somewhere in the south to develop a southern accent. The more pressing question in my mind was why she had left…Was it because of me?
“Dean let me look into it and get back with you.” I disconnected the phone as I entered my apartment.
She was gone. Just like that, she left. There was only one connection that I knew I still had with her. I frantically punched her name on my phone and waited for her to answer. It took a minute to register what the noise was and where it was coming from. Her phone was ringing from my office. I slowly walked to the door as if I were going to see her sitting there. In reality, I knew better. Her phone lay on my desk beside her apartment key and a white envelope.
I looked at the envelope as if it were a deadly snake curled up on my desk. I didn’t know if I could bring myself to read it. After all, I knew what it most likely said. Just when I thought my day couldn’t get worse, this happened. My subconscious was obviously not communicating with my brain because I had unknowingly picked up the envelope and removed the folded paper from it…
I was on my third time reading it, when my phone buzzed again. Knowing that it would
not be her, I looked at the screen. It was Dean. Although I sure as hell didn’t want to talk, I owed him some form of direction. I picked up the phone and began speaking before he could get a word in.
“Dean, Cam left me a letter. She is gone on her own free will. There is no need for you to try to locate her. It seems she most likely doesn’t want to be found. You can just go back to your duties prior to Cam’s arrival.”
As my normal fashion would have it, I hung up the phone before allowing him to respond.
Well, that had been fun. I would have to call Reed in the morning and get back into the call girl routine. This may be the best thing that could have happened. After all, I really didn’t need to get use to one woman fulfilling my needs. Variety is the spice of life, right?
Hell, who was I kidding? I knew I couldn’t go back to those skanks. They couldn’t hold a candle to Cam. Besides, I was worried about her. It sounded like she was in trouble. I couldn’t let her deal with her demons on her own. I had seen what they had done to her the first time. This time, they may just finish her off. If that happened, I would never forgive myself for just letting her walk straight into hell. There was only one thing I could do. I picked up my phone.
“Drake, this is Aiden. Remember Camilla Anderson that we discussed previously? Well, I need you to find out everything you can on her, and I need it yesterday. She has left, and I fear she may be in danger. I will pay whatever it takes. I want everything on her from the time she became an egg in her mother’s abdomen until now. Leave nothing out! I do not want you or anybody you work with to sleep until that report is in my hands. Do whatever it takes to get the information. Money is not an object!”