by Jemma Forte
Still, once she was up and showered, having negotiated the temperamental plumbing in Pam’s guest bathroom, Jessica was raring to go, although the novelty of catching the tube was starting to wear off a bit. In fact, that morning’s was one of the most tiresome journeys yet. She had to stand the entire way, so was pleased to be greeted at work by some positive news.
The ratings for last week’s show were in and it was confirmed. Helena Davies had been an inspired booking and an utter triumph.
‘I’ll have to buy you a drink, Jess,’ Kerry was saying across her desk as Paul walked through the door.
Jessica’s heart sort of twanged in her chest when she saw him. He was wearing jeans and a grey sweatshirt, so nothing special, but for whatever reason he looked really good. Oh, great, she thought dolefully, remembering what Dulcie had said. Developing a crush on someone so unpredictable was not what she needed.
‘Hi, Paul,’ said Kerry. ‘Good weekend?’
‘Fair to middling,’ he replied enigmatically. ‘What about you, fatty?’
‘It was OK, thanks,’ said Kerry, tapping away on her keyboard. ‘The spa was lovely anyway. The hotel was a bit “travel tavern” but you get what you pay for, I suppose.’
‘Well, you look … exactly the same as you did before,’ he laughed, hopping away as Kerry took a swipe at him with a magazine.
‘I’m just on Facebook, actually,’ she said good-humouredly. ‘I’m changing my status to “Kerry Taylor has still got spa face”.’
Isy, who was busy putting Bradley’s various autograph cards into separate piles, started to laugh. ‘What the hell is spa face?’
‘Well,’ said Kerry, ‘my hair was covered in oil and, as you know, it’s a bugger to control at the best of times, so I looked like the Medusa. I had red lines on my face from where I’d been lying with my head through one of those hole things and I was dribbling.’
‘You paint an attractive picture,’ chimed in Luke from across the office. ‘Wish I could have been there to see it.’
‘Attractive I definitely wasn’t,’ retorted Kerry, picking up her coffee mug and realizing it was empty.
‘I don’t get the appeal of Facebook,’ interjected Penny, the vision mixer, who had come into the office to catch up on her paperwork and was sitting at Julian’s desk. ‘I mean, why do you feel the need to tell everyone you know about your weekend?’
‘God knows,’ said Kerry, ‘but it’s a laugh, I suppose. In fact, are you on it, Jessica? Where are you? I’ll add you as a friend and then you too can benefit from my hilarious status updates. After you’ve made us a cup of coffee that is.’
‘Oh, yes,’ she said, still distracted by the sight of Paul rolling up his sleeves and flexing his fingers as he prepared to type. He had lovely forearms, she thought, as she crossed the office to put the kettle on. ‘I’m in the group LA LA Land and listed as Jessica Gra–’ Just in time, she thought about what she was saying. ‘Actually,’ she said quickly, spooning Nescafé into a mug and selecting a herbal tea for herself, ‘I’ve just remembered. I’m not on Facebook any more. I stopped it before I came away.’
‘Thought you weren’t,’ said Paul distractedly.
‘How would you know?’ said Natasha, as quick as anything. ‘Did you look for Jessica on Facebook, Paul?’
Paul, who had but didn’t really know why, refused to rise to the bait. ‘You know me, Tash. I’m a nosy bugger. Didn’t look for long though. Do you know how many Jessica Benders there are on Facebook? Bloody hundreds.’
‘Well, I’m not on anyway,’ Jessica said, feeling flushed. She made a mental note never to check her page while at work. Apart from anything else, people might be surprised to see that Leonora Whittingston was one of her ‘friends’.
‘But why come off now?’ asked Natasha, screwing up her eyes suspiciously. She could be irritatingly persistent. ‘What with you being away from home, I would have thought you’d want to keep up with your mates.’
Jessica just shrugged and looked away, stirring Kerry’s coffee more vigorously than was strictly necessary.
‘Look, can we forget about all this Facebook bollocks, please?’ said Kerry. ‘As much as I’d like to revel in the glory that was last week’s show, we’ve got another one to think about now and we’re a guest down … again.’
The office settled down and a relatively peaceful morning’s work ensued. Later that afternoon, an hour or so after everyone had returned from lunch in the canteen, Jessica was so engrossed in an email which Kerry had asked her to draft to an agent that when at first she heard a familiar voice it took her a moment or two to register it was one that didn’t belong in the office.
‘Hi, hi there, how are you today? Do you know where Jessica sits? Actually, scrap that, I see her … hi …’
Jessica spun round in her seat as if someone had just poked her with a hot iron. ‘Dulcie!’ she hissed. ‘What the hell are you doing here?’
She could hardly believe her eyes. Her best friend was standing in the middle of the room, looking like a peacock that had lost its way. She was dolled up to the nines, resplendent in a mixture of Versace, Alexander McQueen and Marc Jacobs. The most subtle thing about her outfit was her nail varnish and that was fluorescent orange.
‘Hi, honey, surprise … again,’ she said, an infuriating lack of caution in her voice. ‘I thought I’d pop in and see how you were doing. You were being so strict about not taking any time off so I decided to come to you.’
Jessica was furious. How dare she jeopardize everything? She couldn’t even say anything because every single person in the office had downed tools to have a good stare. Including Paul. There was a chance she was about to hyperventilate.
‘Who are you?’ asked Kerry, giving Dulcie a very thorough once-over.
‘Dulcie Malone. Friend of Jessica’s,’ said Dulcie, swaggering over to greet her. ‘And you are?’
‘Wondering what you’re doing here,’ Kerry answered in a flash, completely deadpan.
‘I’m so sorry, Kerry,’ said Jessica, desperate to gain some control of the situation. ‘I did tell my friend that she wasn’t supposed to come here,’ she said between gritted teeth. ‘That I was working …’
‘So you’re Kerry,’ said Dulcie. ‘Oh my God, Jess has told me so much about you. You book the guests, don’t you?’
Instantly Jessica understood very clearly what this visit was all about, which only made the desire to scream at Dulcie even stronger.
‘Yes,’ said Kerry, looking at Dulcie with barely concealed contempt, while Natasha just looked downright suspicious, as if a rather large penny was about to drop. Horrified, Jessica was propelled into action.
‘Dulcie, can I talk to you outside for a second? People are trying to work in here and you’re being very distracting,’ she said, leaping up to manhandle a startled Dulcie through the office. ‘Let’s catch up out here,’ she hissed, shoving Dulcie out of the door and into the corridor. ‘I’ll literally be a minute, Kerry,’ she called over her shoulder. ‘I’m very sorry, back in a sec –’
In the corridor, Jessica let rip. ‘What the hell do you think you’re doing? You know I don’t want anyone here to know who I am. How selfish can you be?’
‘I’m sorry,’ said Dulcie, looking a little regretful for the first time since she’d arrived. ‘I just thought if I came here myself, I could make your boss see that I would be the perfect guest. You were so … closed off about helping me. Isn’t this the best way to get what we both want?’
‘No,’ hissed Jessica. ‘It isn’t, and what I want is to try and cope on my own for once, with none of the baggage of who I am getting in the way, which you know. So you’re completely out of order because now people will suspect that something’s up. Look at you. You look like you’re going to the freaking Emmys or something.’
At this point Dulcie had the good grace to look mildly shamefaced. ‘I’m sorry, OK,’ she muttered. ‘I didn’t realize the office dress code would be so casual and I didn’t mean to
upset you. I guess I didn’t really think it through.’
‘No, you didn’t,’ agreed Jessica.
‘Is my outfit really too much?’
‘Aaerrrugh,’ wailed Jessica and Dulcie looked properly worried for the first time.
‘OK, OK, what should I do?’ asked Dulcie. ‘It’ll look weird if I just disappear.’
Jessica shrugged, feeling utterly defeated. She slid down the wall in a crumpled heap of despair.
‘Oh, don’t be like that, Jess,’ rallied Dulcie. ‘You’re giving up. Now come on. We can make this work. Just leave it to me and try to remember …’ she stopped for a dramatic pause.
‘What?’ snapped Jessica.
‘We’re AmeriCAN, not BritISH.’
And with that she swept back towards the production office.
Jessica willed herself not to cry. She knew she should get up but felt too immobilized by the dread of what Dulcie might do next. Still, leaving her unattended wasn’t an option either. Taking a deep breath, she got back on her feet and willed herself back into the office, where her fate was about to be sealed, one way or another.
‘So, anyway …’ she could hear Dulcie saying to Kerry as she walked through the door. Her heart sank as she saw that Dulcie was perched on the corner of Kerry’s desk in a presumptuous manner she just knew Kerry wouldn’t be appreciating.
‘… not only is my dad Vincent Malone, but I’m also marrying Kevin Johnson. You know, the guy who was runner-up on American Idol last season? He was the guy who everyone thought should have won. So, on top of my own talent and project, I would have so much to talk about.’
‘Can you get off my desk?’ asked Kerry, sounding highly irritated.
‘So how exactly do you know Jessica then?’ asked Natasha, who was swinging back in her chair, observing the whole scene like a lion who’d spotted a lone impala at the watering hole.
‘Ah,’ said Dulcie, turning to Jessica and giving her what she obviously thought was a reassuring wink. ‘I was just coming to that. You see, her dad is …’
‘Oh, be quiet,’ interrupted Jessica in a flash. ‘No one wants to hear about my boring old dad. Boring old Mr Bender,’ she emphasized.
‘Oh, I don’t know,’ said Natasha. ‘I think it all sounds fascinating.’
Luke was clutching his sides as he tried not to laugh out loud. Paul wasn’t quite so amused by the whole scene.
‘If you’ll just give me a chance, Jess,’ said Dulcie. ‘I was about to say that your dad, Mr Bender, is my dad’s chauffeur, which is how Jess and I know each other. And just because he’s a chauffeur doesn’t make him boring,’ she finished, looking terribly pleased with herself at this extra ad lib.
Help, thought Jessica sorrowfully.
‘Your dad drives Vincent Malone?’ said Kerry. ‘You didn’t tell me that.’
‘You didn’t ask,’ replied Jessica weakly.
‘Is that how you knew about him being on the show?’
‘He’s been his driver for years,’ said Dulcie, getting on a roll. ‘Have you seen the film Sabrina with Audrey Hepburn? Jessica’s life is a bit like hers. We’ve kind of grown up together, yet we’re worlds apart.’
At this point Luke got up and excused himself from the room, shoulders heaving. Natasha was the only one who looked slightly impressed, though her cool demeanour prevented her from showing it. Besides, she wasn’t just impressed, she was also consumed with jealousy to discover that Jessica was friends with someone so glamorous and that her life overlapped with proper Hollywood stars.
‘I like your dress,’ she said now, casually. ‘McQueen, isn’t it?’
‘Yeah,’ confirmed Dulcie enthusiastically.
‘Thought so,’ said Natasha. ‘I’ve seen it in Elle.’
Paul rolled his eyes and grimaced in Dulcie’s direction. Jessica could tell she was his idea of hell. Too awful even to bother taking the piss out of. Today she almost agreed with him. Somehow, in this environment, Dulcie was coming across far worse than she ever would at home.
‘Well,’ said Kerry, contempt oozing from every pore, ‘while I can only imagine how lovely it must have been for Jess to grow up in such close proximity to yourself, Ms Malone, in answer to your request to be a guest, the reply is no. You’re not our sort of guest, I’m afraid, and we only have people on who have something to talk about that involves themselves. Not just their dads.’
‘Are you sure about that?’ said Paul sarcastically. ‘Scarlett O’Hara here might make for some good old-fashioned car crash telly.’
‘Excuse me,’ said Dulcie indignantly, and Jessica briefly considered leaping from the window. ‘I don’t know who you think you are, but I am in the room, you know. Who the hell is this guy anyway?’ she asked, turning to Jessica for enlightenment.
‘Paul,’ she mumbled, wishing he hadn’t felt the need to be quite so harsh.
‘Really?’ squawked Dulcie. ‘Him?’ Her incredulous expression said it all.
Jessica glared at her, hating herself for caring more about what Paul thought than her oldest friend.
‘I’m probably going to book Lisa Wright this week anyway. Her plot lines are pretty huge right now,’ said Kerry flatly.
‘Lisa who?’ said Dulcie, looking downright deflated, but still not having clicked that it was most definitely time to call it a day.
‘Wright,’ sighed Kerry, who’d noticed Julian looking very doubtful. ‘I know it’s not ideal, but trust me, I think she’ll be OK. Besides, I can always cancel her if someone better comes up last minute.’
‘Er, hello?’ flapped Dulcie, indicating herself.
‘Not you,’ Kerry snapped.
Jessica held her head in her hands, like a small child watching Doctor Who, who was too frightened to look properly, scared of what she might see. Only when Dulcie had finally got the hint and announced she was leaving did she look up again.
‘I’ll see you out,’ she said.
‘Make sure you take her right out of the building,’ said Paul drily.
‘Oh, I will,’ said Jessica.
19
Jessica spent the rest of the day dealing with the fallout from Dulcie’s impromptu trip to the office while stressing out about what Natasha might be thinking. She had obviously decided there was something suspicious about Jessica, and was scrutinizing everything she did and said. She kept fishing for information about Jessica’s life back home, asking question after question, almost in the hope of tripping her up. Still, Jessica robotically stuck to Dulcie’s story, while keeping detail to a bare minimum, figuring the less she said, the less she’d have to remember. Still, there was one question she found very hard to deal with, though it wasn’t Natasha who asked it.
It was the next day, after work, and the usual suspects had popped to the pub for a quick drink. Jessica was chatting to Luke when suddenly, out of the blue, Paul said, ‘How can you bear to be friends with someone like that?’
Despite having half-expected something like this from him, Jessica didn’t appreciate being asked in front of everyone. She also thought it was a little ridiculous of him to sound so personally affronted by her friendship with Dulcie.
‘She’s not that bad,’ defended Jessica, ‘you just need to get to know her. She’s really a sweet person deep down.’
Paul looked mystified. ‘Really? Only from where I was sitting, she seemed dreadful. Spoilt and egotistical, and those were the good parts.’
Jessica could sense that Paul’s disappointment stemmed from the fact that he thought more highly of her, which was kind of a backhanded compliment, only one that wasn’t really wanted. What right did he have to cast judgement on her friend, even if Dulcie had given off a lousy first impression?
The evening after the whole debacle Jessica had returned home to find a remorseful Dulcie waiting for her in Pam’s kitchen. Having had a chance to think things through, she was sincerely sorry for what she’d done and Jessica could tell that the lukewarm reception she’d received from her workmates had rather ta
ken the wind out of her sails too. It also seemed to have made Dulcie realize what a brave thing it was that Jessica was doing, plus helped her to finally accept that Jessica wouldn’t be taking a day off work. That said, she was still only going to be in town for a week so wanted to see her every evening. What with working so hard, all the after-work activity, plus commuting, Jessica’s new ‘normal’ lifestyle was starting to take its toll and she already felt like she was gaining some insight into how easy she’d always had it.
By Wednesday Jessica was feeling so weary that when Kerry asked her if she wanted to come into Hammersmith at lunchtime for some retail therapy in Primark, she declined the invite. The other girls spoke of ‘Primani’ so affectionately, but the one time she’d gone with them she’d failed miserably to find anything, which had made her realize that maybe some of her mother’s fashion influence had rubbed off on her after all.
Alone and deep in thought, she made her way to the canteen. Ten minutes later she was just about to reach the end of the usual slow-moving line.
‘Penny for them?’ said a voice in her ear.
Jessica jumped and turned round to find Paul regarding her with those incredible eyes of his.
‘Oh, hi … um, oh – nothing,’ said Jessica. ‘I was just wondering what you Brits have got against fresh fruit and veg.’
Paul looked at her. There was something about Jessica Bender that intrigued him. An air about her that made him want to tease her mercilessly on the one hand, while on the other, made him want to … look after her or something. If he wasn’t so into Natasha he’d be tempted to say he was attracted to her and yet there was so much about Jessica that wasn’t his type, traits she possessed that normally he would dislike. Yet somehow what irked him in others – her naivety, her all-American, girl-next-door persona, her lack of astuteness about certain things – added up to an appealing package. Jessica Bender puzzled him, he realized in a sudden moment of clarity.