by Toni Aleo
For me. That has to mean something.
Even with the craziness of his family, I can still feel him on my lips. I hear his words, see the compassion in his eyes. When his fingers moved along my cheek, catching my tears, I didn’t care if we were only supposed to be friends. I wanted more. I wanted him. My heart is pounding, my stomach is fluttering like crazy, and holy shit, that really just happened.
And I want more. So much more.
I turn to see him hold up his hands and announce, “All of you—and I mean this—get one pirate joke a day!”
Fallon looks him over as Emery stands beside her, inspecting and holding back her laughter. “Nope. I can’t commit to only one joke a day. It’s going to be at least ten an hour,” she says as she squints at him. “Who did you get in a fight with, and why?”
Asher glares at her as he answers. “That idiot Ally was dating because he had her by her throat.”
Then everyone looks at me. I grimace. “Yeah, I know. I’m dumb.”
“You’re so much better than him!” Fallon yells at me, and I nod. “You’re lucky you have a great friend who will protect you.”
I move my attention to Asher, but Lucas is looking at him. “Man, how’s the other guy look?”
Aiden scoffs. “Like roadkill. Asher got him good, and the only reason he’s a pirate right now is because the dude was wearing a ring.”
Lucas smacks Asher on the back. “That’s my boy.”
“Lucas!” Fallon exclaims.
“What? He stood up for his friend. He’s a hero. Be proud of him!”
“But he could have lost his eye.”
Lucas shrugs. “Yes, but he looks dashing with the patch.”
“Dad, be real. He looks like a wannabe Jack Sparrow,” Stella says dryly as she looks him over.
“Hopefully his audition tape for that gets lost with the one for Fast and Furious,” Emery says, shaking her head, and I snort.
Asher glares. With one eye. “Guys, I’m good. Can someone get these girls out of here?”
They both feign hurt. “We came to support you and make sure you’re okay, Bootstrap Ash. Be nice,” Emery teases, and then she snorts. “Ha! How will Asher communicate with his other pirate friends?”
Stella grins. “How?”
“Aye to aye!” she announces in her best pirate voice. Asher is not impressed. My side hurts from laughing. Poor Fallon and Lucas are trying not to laugh, while Aiden is lying across the bed cackling. “I got another one! If Asher were a pirate in college, what grades would he get?”
Asher is going to lose his shit. Emery, she doesn’t care. “High seas!”
No one can contain their laughter—well, except Asher. “Chuckle it up, chuckles.”
Oh, she does. She holds up her palms to him, snorting and choking on her laughter. “One more, one more.”
“Can I be discharged?” Asher yells, but Emery is louder.
“It’s really going to be hard to get Asher on the phone now that he’s a pirate.”
Emery looks at us, and Fallon asks, “Why?”
“You know, because he’ll leave it…off the hook!”
The laughter in the room is abundant as Asher hits the nurse button continuously. “Yeah, all of you laugh. What a family I have,” he complains, but it’s too funny to ignore.
I do feel bad, though. He did become a pirate for me. I reach out, squeezing his shoulder, and heat runs up my arm. I think he feels it too because he looks up at me, his eye dark and hooded. My breath catches as my lips part, and his eye locks with mine. I don’t know what to say, but I sure as hell want to kiss him again. I can’t in front of the peanut gallery, though, not until I know what he is thinking. I really wish I knew what he was thinking.
The doctor comes into the room then, stealing Asher’s attention. “All right, you are discharged, Mr. Brooks,” he says, handing him some papers. “You’re not allowed to drive until that patch comes off. Take your meds and make sure to go to your appointment. Can someone take you home?”
I go to volunteer, but Fallon beats me to it. “Yes, he’ll come home with us.”
“Wait, what? No, I’m good!” Asher tries, but Lucas takes him by the shoulder with a stern look on his face. “No, son, you’ll come home. We gotta make sure you don’t walk the plank.”
I press my lips together as the room explodes with laughter. Emery and Lucas high-five, and I notice even the doctor is laughing. Aiden is on the floor, laughing, and Asher, bless him, but he is livid. “Can I be admitted?”
The doctor laughs as he shakes his head. “Nope. But you can leave—and take these people with you. They’re loud.”
“Exactly. Please don’t make me leave with them,” he begs, but the doctor walks out of the room with no concern for Asher’s wishes. Reluctantly, Asher follows his family out. I walk with him, waiting for him to say something, but he doesn’t. He looks at the paperwork, his phone, and soon, an awkward feeling rushes over me. I press my lips together as my heart sinks in my chest.
I think I fucked up.
Once outside, Lucas brings the car up and I try to talk to Asher, but his mom is talking his ear off. I love Fallon, but man, I wish she’d shut up. When she looks at me, she says, “You drove his car, right?”
I nod. “Yeah.”
“Okay, can you take Aiden home and just take the car with you? He doesn’t need it, and knowing you, you’ll be helping him get places.”
I swallow hard. Especially when Asher doesn’t look at me. “Yeah,” I choke out. “No problem.”
When Lucas pulls up with the girls in the back seat of the car, Asher grudgingly gets in. But he doesn’t even really look at me. “Take care of my car. I’ll call you later.”
That’s it?
I stand there, completely crushed, as the tears threaten to fall.
But then I remember Aiden is beside me. He reaches out, wrapping his arm around my neck. “Well, that was eventful.”
I swallow hard and ignore my breaking heart. “Yeah, a story for the ages.”
“My sisters are going to drive him into a mental institution.”
I can’t laugh. “Yeah.”
“You’ll have to go save him.”
“I owe him, huh?”
“For sure. I’ve never seen or known him to fight anyone. Shows how much you mean to him.”
I meet his gaze, and it’s almost as if he sees through me. I don’t know what he is implying or even if he is implying anything. Maybe I’m too emotional. His eyes, his words, they all make me really uncomfortable, so I jerk my head to the side, moving out of his arms in the direction of the car. “Let’s get you home.”
I didn’t sleep last night.
I tossed, I turned, and I checked my phone a million times an hour.
I felt horrible since Angie was trying to sleep, but I had no choice. I need to talk to Asher. After spending hours at the police station, she got home when I did and fell face first into her bed. I’m so incredibly proud of her for pressing charges. I know I may have forced her to, but she told me the only reason she didn’t when it happened was because I was with Taco. Fuck him. Fuck that—press the charges. Apparently, Nicolette had seen it happen, so Angie has a witness. And in so many words, Taco admitted to it, so hopefully, he’ll get in trouble for his actions. I am worried about Asher since Taco did say he was going to press charges, but I haven’t heard anything yet.
Actually, it’s radio silence on Asher’s end.
I texted him when I got home but no text back. I know he has his phone because his dad went to get it from Aiden. I even tried calling him, but it went to voice mail. I’m trying really hard not to think too much into it. He probably took his meds when he got home and slept off the pain from everything, but still, I wonder why he hasn’t reached out to me. I put myself out there. I made the move, and now, all I can think is that I made the biggest mistake of my life. It didn’t feel like a mistake, though; it felt like I found my home.
The place my heart and lips belo
ng.
I roll my eyes as I pull into Audrey’s cupcakery. Asher’s car drives like a dream, but it makes me a little irate since it’s his and he hasn’t called or texted. It’s so unlike him, and I know that’s the reason for my negative thinking. I get out and see Audrey in the shop, moving around, talking to customers, and being her awesome self. There isn’t a birthday or an event where Audrey Odder’s cakes or cupcakes aren’t involved. She’s another friend of my family, married to the great Tate Odder, the Assassins’ ninja goalie. They own this awesome place, and it’s the only bakery I go to for sweets. Since I wanted to get Angie something to tell her not only am I sorry for what happened, but I’m proud of her, I knew I could do it with one of Audrey’s cupcakes. Or four. We’ll see when I get in there.
I head inside, locking the car as I pull the front door open. When Audrey’s bright gaze falls on me, we both beam at each other. “Well, hey there, Ally!”
“Hey,” I say as she comes around to hug me. “It’s good to see you.”
“You too, my love. How are you?”
“Okay. Last night was a mess.”
She nods, concern filling her features. She is also Asher’s aunt. “Lord, my baby’s eye is disgusting. Fallon is freaking out like he is four again.”
I cringe. “Yeah, it was rough. I’ve never seen him act like that.”
Audrey tilts her head as she heads behind the counter. “He’s fiercely loyal. You’re his person, so I think it was a no-brainer for him.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right,” I say as I swallow. I’m his person, but what if I’m not the person he wants to be with? “I need some cupcakes.”
She grins. “Well, sweet girl, you’re in the right place!”
We share a grin as I start picking out cupcakes. One turns into four and then six by the time I’m done. Of course, I need some for myself. I’m stressing, and the sugary delight will make things somewhat better. I get out my card to pay, but she waves me off. “No way.”
“Audrey—” I try, but she pushes the cupcakes toward me.
“Enjoy.”
“Thank you,” I say with a wide grin. “I’ll see you later.” The bell over the door of the shop rings. I turn to leave, and I’m stunned in place. It’s like my feet are glued to the floor as my eyes lock with Asher’s good eye.
He’s surprised to see me, I can tell, and I don’t feel like it’s a happy surprise either. As it normally is. No, it’s “What the hell are you doing here?” kind of surprised, and it scares me. In seconds, I know I never should have kissed him.
“Hey—”
Before he can finish, Audrey yells as she comes toward him, “My Slim Jim!” He groans as she wraps her arms around him, kissing him hard on the cheek. Fallon laughs as she sideways-hugs me. “My poor boy! How are you?”
“I was okay until I came in here and was reminded of my awful nickname,” he says dryly, but Audrey doesn’t seem fazed by his aggravation as Fallon heads toward the counter. Audrey kisses him again, petting his patch and then his chest.
“I made you carrot cake cupcakes to make you feel better.”
He moves his gaze to me for a split second before he looks back to her. “Thank God, I need them.”
“How are you feeling?” I ask, needing his attention.
Needing to know if I really messed things up.
He shrugs. “I’m all right. It hurts like fire. Mom has been babying me and feeding me my meds.”
“That’s good,” I say, forcing a smile. “I texted you.”
“Yeah, I’m really sorry. I passed out when I got to the house, and then this morning I had that follow-up appointment—”
“Oh? How did it go?”
“Okay. It’s a minor cut. He’s not worried about my vision, and I could actually see a bit out of it.”
I nod happily. It’s forced, but hey, I’m trying. “Oh, thank goodness.”
“Yeah.”
Time passes between us, and then I ask the question that’s burning inside me. “Why didn’t you tell me about it?”
He shrugs once more. “I don’t know, Ally. My head is all over the place.” I don’t say anything. I don’t know what to say. His gray eyes are dull when they meet mine, and my stomach drops out my ass. “I should have.”
“Yeah. I’m worried about you.”
He draws in a breath through his nose, looking every bit put out. “I know.”
“And I feel we have stuff to talk about.”
He licks his lips. “I figured we’d do it in person.”
“When? Gotta answer the phone for that,” I say sharper than I intended. “This isn’t like you.”
I almost ask if he’s mad at me, but I don’t know if I can handle the answer.
He hesitates and looks everywhere but at me. “I know. Listen, I’m sorry. My meds make me tired and cranky, and I hate this white patch. Emery won’t leave me alone, and yeah, I’m being a dick. I’m sorry.”
But it’s not the apology I wanted.
I nod slowly, fighting back the tears. “Totally fine. Totally cool. Hey, I’ll see you later—”
“Ally—” he tries, but I move past him.
“No, it’s cool. See ya around.”
He doesn’t stop me. He doesn’t call my name. He lets me go.
Once I get to the car, I sit there and wait for him to come out. I check my phone—and nothing. I thought maybe he’d text me to say he wanted to talk later, but he doesn’t. When the tears start to fall, I let them because I was stupid enough to allow this to happen. I knew it could go this way, that he wouldn’t want me the way I want him, but I wanted so much for it to be everything I dreamed of.
Problem is, dreams aren’t always reality.
Chapter Seventeen
Asher
Well, I fucked that up.
I shake my head as I fall into the nearest chair and cup my face in my hands. I’m freaking the fuck out. I hadn’t expected to see Ally so soon. I needed a little longer to process everything that happened last night. My reaction to Taco grabbing her. Aiden’s thoughts about what I am feeling and, ultimately, her lips on mine. I spent all night thinking and feeling Ally’s lips; sleep was forced because of the pain meds. Even when I was asleep, I was dreaming of her. I can’t seem to wrap my head around what happened, and I’m unsure why she kissed me. I want to believe she feels something for me, but for so long, we’ve just been friends. Never has she said she wanted more. Or even acted as if she wanted more. When did it change for her? What changed? I’ve always been irresistible. And now, I’m grinning because if Ally were here, she’d tease me.
Fuck, I guess I should have called and asked.
Problem is, I can’t shake these overwhelming feelings. Never in my life have I felt what I did when her lips pressed into mine. I know I was high on pain meds, but I swear it was her lips, the taste of her, and the way her hand held my jaw that made me feel as if I were flying. That I was completely hers. I’ve never tossed and turned because of how a girl made me feel. Especially from just a kiss. That’s all it was. A quick, mind-blowing, world-shattering kiss and I refuse to think of anything but that. The feelings that keep smacking me in the chest are suffocating and jolt me to my core.
So many questions swirl in my head. Does she care for me? As more than a friend? Or was she overemotional after all that happened? Do I want more? And if so, will we be as good as we are now? I can’t lose her. I don’t understand what I am feeling. I’ve done so well hiding my feelings all this time, but here I am. I am freaking the hell out.
The unknown is terrifying, but I sure as hell don’t like the way she looked at me just now. As if I didn’t care for her, worry about her feelings, or respect her—because I do. So much so, I’m in my head. There is a line, and I see it. It’s huge and red, and on one side is the great friendship we have. Where we joke, talk about absolutely anything, and we’re so comfortable together. Nothing matters but us, and we have a damn good time.
On the other side of the line are
those kisses, touching her, and, ultimately, sex with her. Which, if she kisses me like that again, I might skip the touching and take her to the nearest surface. I really want to cross that line. It’s killing me not to, but my only worry is that what we have on the safe side won’t be on the other side. In reality, I want to break through the fucking line, wrap my arms around her, and kiss the living shit out of her.
I think I want to cross that line…if she wants to.
I lift my head. “Fuck, I need to see her.”
“Asher! Language!” Mom hollers at me. “What is wrong with you?”
I get up, reaching for the cupcakes on the counter, and throw another whole one in my mouth. I eat when I’m nervous, and going to the next step with Ally terrifies me. “I need you to take me to Ally’s dorm.”
She is incredulous. “She was just here! Why didn’t you go with her?”
“We had a fight. Ignore that detail, and come on.”
She gives me a dry look. “I don’t run on your time schedule, mister. Audrey and I are discussing something.”
I look to Audrey, who is grinning from ear to ear. “You’re going after her because you loooooovvveee her,” she says, cooing at me, and I give her an even stare.
“You don’t know that.”
“But I do. You aren’t the aggressive type—that all went to your sisters—so your actions mean something. You care for her, more than just this friendship theatrics you two have been putting on for so long, Slim Jim. Wait, I can’t call you Slim Jim?”
“No, you shouldn’t—”
She grins. “You’re right. You’re more of a beef stick now.”
Kill me now. I ignore my crazy aunt and look at my mom. “Can we leave?”
“We know it’s true,” Audrey says, leaning on her hand. “We all know the truth, wanna join us?”
I look at my mom, and she nods. “I’ve always known.”
I blink. Wasn’t expecting that, but I sure as hell don’t want to talk to them about this. I need to talk to Ally. “You guys are delusional. Can you take me? I forgot my phone at home, and I can’t call an Uber or, hell, Ally, for that matter.”