by Albion, Rex
“I’ll read those to you in bed,” Vandal offered with a grin and Roxy rolled her eyes at him. Perfect response. He loved a good pun, but not as much as a bad one.
“We can bring anything I can scrounge up when we first visit the temple. I’m sure I have more seeds and old pots and things,” Flora said, looking Roxy and Vandal up and down and smiling slyly. “Perhaps I can find some canes for you too.”
“For climbing plants?” Vandal asked. “Peas, right?” He said, proud of his enormous wealth of knowledge about vegetable gardening.
Flora shrugged. “You can use them for gardening too.”
Roxy tittered, “How naughty, Flora.”
“I thought you might be the type, Priestess Lickspring,” Flora said.
“Me? But I’m so sweet and innocent,” Roxy protested. “I’m not surprised that you’re the type though, Flora. I think you can be quite cheeky when you put your mind to it.”
“You might very well think that. I’m sure I couldn’t possibly comment,” Flora said, adopting an entirely unearned expression of innocence.
New Skill: Gardening. Roxy has been given a new skill because she joined a guild.
New Acquaintance: You have made a new friend, contact, or ally, Flora, Guild Leader, Tinshire Gardeners. 50 XP
New Worshipper: Flora has become a worshipper at your Temple of Amoria.
“Do the scriptures say anything about confessionals?” Roxy teased.
“Not as other cults use them,” Flora said. “I’m sure if my Priestess wanted me to confess my infractions though, Amoria would approve.”
“You’d best see if you have any spare canes, then,” Roxy said.
Flora curtseyed deeply, licking her lips provocatively as she did, “Yes, Priestess. Your wishes are my commands.”
“I could get used to this,” Roxy said to Vandal as Flora rose to her feet.
“I don’t think Flora is the only one with things to confess, Roxy. Fortunately, when Amoria asked us to serve, you insisted that I lead the Temple as High Priest, with you as my High Priestess, rather than vice versa,” Vandal pointed out.
“I think Priestess Lickspring can confess to you then, when she needs to, High Priest Lionheart,” Flora agreed. “I’m sure you’ll find something in the scriptures about it.” She grinned wickedly at Roxy, her eyes twinkling.
“I’m sure we will, Flora. Now, we must get over to the Herbalist’s Guild so I can join that too. I can’t wait to talk some more about all sorts of things. I’m sure you’ll be a vital source for us as we build up the Temple and congregation,” Roxy said.
“Absolutely, you’ve been a godsend, perhaps literally,” Vandal suggested.
“I long to serve,” Flora said, dropping another curtsy.
“You will, Flora, you will,” Roxy confirmed as they took their leave.
“Do tell Marjoram I sent you. Insist on speaking to her.”
“That was a lucky break,” Vandal whispered.
“Divine providence, I assume.”
Chapter Thirty-Five
“I don’t wish to be rude, but I must insist on speaking to Marjoram. Flora was very clear on that,” Roxy said.
The secretary looked over her horn-rimmed spectacles at them and huffed. She seemed to be made in the mould of a doctor’s receptionist and default to obstructing them. Vandal had fixed a smile to his face and moved away from the desk, reading posts on the wall. “Take Thyme Out,” one suggested, another read, “Thyme Waits for No Man”. A third said, “Thyme is On Your Side.” At that point, Vandal decided the poster designer was either lazy, or obsessed with one narrow type of herbal pun and he gave up.
A display cabinet, reminiscent of a butterfly collector's cases, showed off sprigs of various herbs so he concentrated on trying to memorise those instead. At least he might spot something Roxy could look at in the forest.
“This is most irregular. Marjoram doesn’t have time to be seeing just anyone,” the woman complained. “She’s too accommodating to that woman. She should put her in her place.”
But finally, she got up and took them down a corridor, opening a door with a brass plaque bearing the legend, “Dr Marjoram. Guild Mistress of the Herbalist’s Guild (Tinshire Region).”
“Marjoram, visitors who insist on speaking to you,” the receptionist barked, as if Marjoram also wasn’t supposed to be making her do things.
There was a startled squeak, a thud of someone banging a knee on furniture, a muffled voice and, a woman called out, “It’s not convenient right now, Capsaicin.”
“Well, Flora insisted these Awoken see you, apparently, and I’m not getting involved in you two arguing,” Capsaicin retorted, with no trace of respect for someone Vandal imagined was supposed to be her boss.
“I really,” Marjoram started, then said, something in a whisper that sounded like it might be vulgar and sighed loudly. “Very well, Capsaicin. Thank you so much for your helpful attitude, as always.”
“The Mistress of the Guild will see you now,” the receptionist snapped at them. Then Capsaicin rolled her eyes and stomped off back to her domain, no doubt to try and spoil someone else’s day or eat an apprentice who wasn’t quick enough to grovel to her, Vandal imagined.
Vandal followed Roxy inside the office and pulled the heavy door shut behind them. It made an almost ominous click which seemed quite out of character for a bunch of flower pressers and poultice makers.
The office was a classic wood panelled affair, with a huge and expensive looking desk, the kind that had dark green leather embedded in it. It would probably have been mahogany back home, but Vandal just saw dark wooden panels between the legs that dropped all the way to the floor. They were covered in carvings of plants, rather predictably.
The head of the Guild was a completely different type of woman to the entirely human seeming Flora. She was of an age, and more willowy, than she was voluptuous. Her hair was bright blue and curled up in a complex bun atop her head. Her skin was green but nothing like the tones of Roxy’s and it seemed at times almost translucent, like an emerald.
She was too tall to be a goblin, and Vandal hadn’t seen one yet, but he wasn’t getting the idea she was an orc or a hobgoblin either. Perhaps a dryad or some other nature related being like an elemental? Presumably it was rude to ask but he couldn’t help but admire her beauty.
Even though Dr Marjoram wore a tweed suit of brown and green patterns, with a yellow silk blouse that Vandal couldn’t quite believe she pulled off.
“Can this possibly wait, or could you see one of my staff for your business?” the herbalist asked, without making eye contact. She seemed to be intent on the papers in her left hand, which she was bunched into a fist that made them curl up to the point Vandal would have thought the top one would be hard to read. Her right hand wasn’t holding a quill for marking, but was under the desk.
“Flora said, I should insist on speaking to you,” Roxy said. “Although she didn’t explain why. I want to join the guild. I’m happy to wait or speak to someone else, if you’re busy?”
“I understand that Flora seemed to think this was important,” Marjoram waved the papers in her hand, and an odd noise somewhere between a cough and a gasp interrupted her response. Then she took a deep breath and slowly let it out before continuing, “I’m just in the middle of assessing an apprentice’s work.” She seemed quite tense, and Vandal saw a little trickle of sweat at her temple. What a strange woman. He turned his head to Roxy and shrugged. This was really up to her, it wasn’t like it would be a problem to wait a while, surely.
“Certainly, can Capsaicin find someone else to speak to me?” Roxy asked.
“Yes, though I’m afraid she will whine about it. She’s mostly bark and no bite, unless you say something unkind about her cats,” Marjoram replied with an odd sigh. “Ahh. I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name?”
“High Priestess, Roxy Lickspring.”
At that, a lot of things happened at once, Dr Marjoram finally looked up, surprise etc
hed across her face. She dropped the papers on her desk, and shifted in her seat, wincing at the thud that came from beneath the desk, accompanied by another strange sound that Vandal couldn’t place. “Ouch,” Marjoram gasped, her right hand shifting on her knee. “This bloody desk is a lot less spacious than it looks, I really should replace it before I dislocate a kneecap.” She protested, unconvincingly.
Marjoram was staring intently at Roxy’s head, or just a little above it. Vandal recognised the expression that locals and Awoken often shared when they were reading the information from someone’s portrait. It seemed that locals could sometimes glean information from his portrait in much the same way he could, but he hadn’t worked out which ones could do it or why. Perhaps just the more powerful ones.
A moment later the woman’s emerald skin went from a rich woodland green to a flush of purple across her cheeks. Was she blushing, he wondered, or was it like a human going ghostly white as blood drained from their face in horror?
“Blessings of the goddess, can it really be? A High Priestess of Amoria, in Tinshire?” Marjoram gasped, her hand flying to her mouth as she saw Vandal’s information. “And a High Priest too. I can scarcely believe it.” The herbalist swallowed and blinked, some natural colour returning to her face.
“It’s true, but really, I can wait or come back when it’s more convenient. I understand you have teaching duties, it’s not a problem.”
“No!” Marjoram blurted out. “I mean, I wouldn’t dream of it, it’s just that, Capsaicin should have knocked and spoken to me so I’m not really in the right frame of mind for visitors.”
“Should we just wait here while you finish your assessment?”
Marjoram licked her lips and pondered her response. Finally, she deflated. “This is so embarrassing, but I wasn’t marking papers, this was a practical assessment of a Journeywoman’s work. I didn’t realise I left the door unlocked.”
Roxy cleared her throat, and Vandal started to get an inkling of why the herbalist was acting like her pants were on fire. “Flora said, she was a worshipper of Amoria, Doctor. Should we take it that you are also?”
“Of course, I’m surprised she didn’t mention it.”
“I suspect she thought it would be a nice surprise for you, but then, she couldn’t know we’d interrupt you, shall we say, capitalising on a teachable moment, could she?”
“No but she’s going to be unbearably smug about it, when she finds out,” Marjoram sighed. “Goddess knows she never misses an opportunity to tease.”
“I’m sure we can keep this between you, me, Vandal, your Journeywoman and Amoria, Doctor Marjoram. Flora need never know.”
“That’s very kind of you, High Priestess,” Marjoram said.
“Think nothing of us. Would you prefer us to leave while you finish up the assessment?” Roxy asked. Vandal still wasn’t sure if he was reading all this correctly, so he didn’t interject.
The herbalist swallowed hard and shook her head.
“Would you prefer we stay?” Roxy asked. “To bear witness for Amoria?”
Marjoram licked her lips, “It would be an honour. Please, both of you have a seat.”
Roxy and Vandal sat in the large chairs opposite the herbalist’s desk.
Doctor Marjoram relaxed slowly, leaning back in her high-backed chair, her left hand joining her right and her mouth opening. Vandal’s eyes widened. Whatever the student had made, it was being tested in a way that would definitely please Amoria. Some kind of aphrodisiac perhaps?
The herbalist's arms moved slowly, as her hands worked, and she moaned with pleasure. He glanced at Roxy and she was chewing her lip, squirming in her own seat. She looked back at him and winked, then her hand found his crotch and she gently teased his throbbing cock through the purple pants Amoria had given him.
“Yes, that’s right,” Marjoram said. “Amoria be praised, it’s not perfect but there’s definite progress.” Vandal’s eyebrows shot up when an unmistakably feminine voice responded from under the desk, albeit unintelligibly muffled.
“Faster girl, the Clerics haven’t got all day,” Marjoram urged, and another squeak was heard as she pulled her arms back. Vandal knew that she’d just pushed her student’s face against her sex and Roxy squeezed him hard through his pants. He drew a sharp breath and she shot him a wicked look. The goblin was only teasing him, and on top of Flora’s story he was feeling incredibly horny. Roxy was going to be for it when he got her back to the Spotted Dick, and she knew it.
“Are all the herbalism tests as practical as this?” Roxy asked.
Marjoram laughed throatily, “No, this one has particular requirements and Sylvia hasn’t mastered it, although she’s getting better every time she tries.”
“Is she not gifted with her tongue?” Roxy teased.
Marjoram purred and writhed her hips, “No, she’s quite talented at eating pussy, aren’t you, Sylvia?” Another muffled but positive sounding response came from between Marjoram’s thighs. “Excuse me, I must concentrate or the test will never finish.”
Sylvia finally got the expected results and Marjoram put her fist to her mouth, biting the knuckle of her index finger as she masked the sound of her climax. The emerald woman’s skin sparkled in waves that emanated from her core and her modest bosom pressed up tight against her blouse, the nipples impossibly hard under the material, as she arched her back.
“Beautiful. Amoria will be pleased.”
“Thank you, High Priestess,” Marjoram sighed softly. She pulled Sylvia up from the floor as she stood up, until the young woman stood, trembling and half naked, before her. Apparently, Sylvia was a human, with a short raven bob of hair that was firmly gripped in Marjoram’s right hand.
“That was better, Sylvia.”
“Thhumpf rhuy, Mthytresst,” Sylvia replied and Roxy chuckled. The poor girl sounded like she’d strained every muscle in her mouth and tongue, and could no longer form words clearly.
Marjoram tilted the junior herbalist’s head back, and kissed her wet lips passionately, her eyes locked on Roxy’s as the goblin continued to tease Vandal’s cock most cruelly. When Marjoram broke the kiss, she licked her lips.
“Silly girl, Sylvia, you are still using too much wormwood. That’s why your tongue went numb, and you had such difficulty making me come,” Marjoram tutted. “Combining a numb tongue and lips, with a less sensitive clitoris, is hardly the desired effect, is it?”
Sylvia shook her head pathetically.
“I want you to go to your room and write out the correct recipe twenty times for me, and tomorrow I will give you an oral test,” Marjoram waved her hand, “by which I mean a verbal test, to confirm you have memorised the correct proportions and process. If you fail again, I shall have to find a punishment that guarantees you’ll study properly. Do I make myself clear?”
Sylvia nodded and hung her head in shame. Vandal could have sworn she had a flash of a smile though.
Roxy cleared her throat, “Would it be terribly impolite of me to ask Sylvia a question, Doctor Marjoram?”
The doctor looked a little taken aback. “It would be unusual for someone who isn’t even an apprentice but then you are a Cleric of Amoria so please, feel free.”
“Thank you. Sylvia, look at me please,” Roxy said, and the young woman reluctantly lifted her head. “I wonder, is it possible you have mastered this recipe already, and your overuse of wormwood is deliberate?”
Marjoram gasped and Vandal stroked his chin, which was rapidly becoming his easy method to conceal his mirth at the strange things he was witnessing so often.
Sylvia blushed beetroot and her numbed tongue answered something Vandal couldn’t understand for the life of him.
“Is it true, Sylvia? Have you been failing deliberately? Just nod or shake dear,” Marjoram sighed.
Sylvia nodded.
“So, that you could be tested again? And again? What is this, your fifth attempt?”
Sylvia nodded several times.
“Don’t
you have a girlfriend?” A shake. “This is not acceptable behaviour, Sylvia. Our work is serious, and you specifically requested to study the Erotic Mysteries course. It’s not a required speciality for you to progress to mastery. What if this were a healing examination? Would you injure yourself deliberately to get more attention and guidance for your salves and potions? Of course not.”
“I’m sorry, Doctor Marjoram, I do hope naughty Sylvia overcomes this streak of rebelliousness,” Roxy said. Vandal wasn’t entirely sure how honest that was, and her sly smile when Marjoram responded confirmed his suspicion that she was enjoying the girl being in trouble. It played right into her own fantasies, as he was beginning to understand better on a daily basis. She was such a minx.
“Oh, you’ll overcome it, Sylvia. I swear it before Amoria and her Clerics, you will overcome this streak of rebelliousness as our guest puts it. Go now, make a fresh batch that’s perfect or I swear, the punishment I’ll already be giving that pert bottom of yours will be tripled. And I’ll use this bad batch on your wet little pussy, so you can’t enjoy it,” Marjoram barked sternly. “Now, get dressed and make yourself scarce.”
The senior herbalist straightened her clothes and poured a round of drinks from her cabinet while the chastened Sylvia hurriedly dressed and scampered from the room. This time, Marjoram went and locked the door.
“I’ll probably have to discipline that girl properly later,” the guild leader sighed as she resumed her seat.
“Now, where were we?”
Chapter Thirty-Six
“You won’t be too hard on her, will you?” Roxy asked.
Marjoram laughed. “No, I’ll probably have her develop this stuff into something marketable. Imagine the control you could have over someone’s desire if this could be perfected?”
Roxy laughed. “So, in her desire to have fun, she might have created a new recipe. You’re not angry that she deceived you?”