by Mary Corran
He stared at her in angry rebuttal, unable to believe she could speak so freely to him, but she held up a hand when he would have spoken. ‘Let me finish. I could command your death, but I shall not, because before you allowed your hopes to falsify the truth, you saved my life. Amrist would have had me murdered as he did my brothers. I will let you go free, to return to Venture, and to wait and watch for what will come, the worse for knowing what must be. For you, this is a greater punishment than death — although you fear that more than I, you who have ordered death for others.’ She paused. ‘I curse you, Avorian.’
‘No!’ He made a gesture of aversion with his right hand, but the movement was listless; an acknowledgement of despair hid behind the frozen mask of his face. Asher felt no stirring of pity for him.
‘For Mylla’s sake I wish him dead,’ she said stiffly. ‘Although in their way both she and Oramen chose their own deaths. But perhaps you are right, and this is the worse punishment for him. I hope it is so, for I shall never find any forgiveness for him.’
‘I had not forgotten.’ Vallis turned to Mallory, head held high. ‘And you? Are you satisfied? You have a right to speak.’
‘It was Lassar who murdered my seeress, albeit on his orders.’ Mallory looked grave as he considered Avorian. ‘But, yes, I will be satisfied with your judgment.’
‘Mistress Asher, you said it was Jerr who killed your friend, but I do not see him here.’
Again, it was the tall servant who spoke for the rest, his sword still covering his erstwhile master. ‘He was drowned earlier today, lady, trying to cross the river by the burned bridge.’
‘Will that suffice you?’ As the younger woman spoke, Asher thought of the prophecy of the Oracle: ‘She casts aside the Shadow and flies upwards, soaring free’, and thought Vallis would be a worthy successor to the hawk, her father, when the time came.
‘It will suffice,’ Asher answered briefly, and knew it was true, that Mylla had been avenged.
‘Then you,’ and Vallis spoke to the tall servant, ‘gather the rest of your men and take the Chief Councillor south to Venture. But leave him, without horse or valuables, a good two days’ walk from the city. Let him learn what it is to be poor and powerless, and let him consider then the ways of the Fates.’
‘Willingly, lady,’ the man answered. ‘Though I’ll wager he’ll have no luck when he gets there, not when we spread this tale. There’s not enough gold in Venture to buy back his good name!’
‘I had not considered that. They may burn his house.’ Vallis seemed to reflect. ‘Then when you reach the city, find the slave-boy, Koris, and remove him.’ She glanced at Mallory. ‘Take him to Councillor Mallory’s establishment, for I feel certain that there he will be well cared for.’
‘He will.’ Mallory looked amused.
‘What is this, then? Vengeance?’ Avorian straightened, constrained by the presence of a sword at his back, but already recovering from the blow Vallis had dealt him. ‘For what? For an error of judgment? I am not an evil man. It was never my intent to injure you, nor our people.’
‘Are you not, Avorian?’ Vallis did not soften. ‘What else is it but evil when you must buy your ambition at the cost of the lives of others? I do not hold life so dear as you, and who knows how heavy a weight of cares may burden a man or woman, so that the hope for peace, for nothingness, is to be preferred to that intolerable affliction? Yet that must be their choice, not mine. How many, Avorian? How many have died because of you? Do you know the number, or their names?’
‘Why should that concern me, when what I did was for the greater good?’ he answered angrily. ‘Politics is expedience, no more; it may not have been right in your naive terms, but it was necessary.’
‘So you say, Avorian, but those you murdered might disagree. It may be better that an evil man or woman die, to safeguard those who might otherwise become their prey, but I should want to be very sure before I dealt the blow.’
‘It was their Fate to die, that I should fulfil my destiny.’ Even now he did not doubt it. ‘Take your vengeance from the Oracle that bespoke their doom, not from me!’
‘It spoke your doom not theirs, and your failure was not theirs.’ Her self-confidence was startling. ‘That is yours alone.’
Avorian looked coldly at Mallory, then at Asher. ‘That man and woman — you chose them over me. May you not live to regret it.’ It sounded more like a threat than desire for Vallis’s safety. ‘May the Oracle grant them all it has given me!’
Vallis put out a protective hand to Asher, as if to safeguard her from Avorian’s ill-wishing. ‘The Fates may deal an uneven hand in the world, and some of us will always sicken and die because the odds against us are too great; perhaps it is a test, that we should learn to conquer ourselves, that we should not take advantage of such tricks to see some as less than human, simply because they are poor or ill-favoured. Or even born women, Avorian,’ she added, with a chill smile. ‘But I will not bandy words further with you. The actions prove the man, and you have shown yourself in your true colours this day. Go, then, with my curse. And may we never meet again in this world.’
Avorian’s shoulders sagged, as if the curse were a heavy demon sitting on his back, but he recovered quickly. He was not yet broken, rather still unaware that he was now bereft of even the hope of hope. Asher watched him go, surrounded by his erstwhile guard, with mixed feelings; the knowledge that he would suffer eased her grief for Mylla, but, perversely, made her hate him more.
The sounds of horses’ hooves finally faded into the distance, leaving behind an awkward tranquillity in which no one seemed to know what to do. Vallis sagged against Mallory, looking pale and drawn, and also sad; Asher put her left hand on the girl’s shoulder, ignoring a stab of pain from her injuries.
‘He’s gone, Vallis,’ she said softly. ‘You’re free.’
‘Free? When I must go away and never see my true father alive again for fear Amrist should have me killed? When he has stolen all those years from me?’ But Vallis did not weep, head held stiffly high. ‘I want to be alone for a time. Then I would like to talk to you.’
‘As you wish.’
A new possibility insinuated itself into Asher’s mind as she agreed, and she sighed; sometimes it was a great deal easier not to be confronted by quite so much choice.
*
It was some time later that Asher left Vallis in the sleeping gallery, descending to the ground floor to rejoin Mallory in a mood of deep contemplation.
‘Asher, do you feel up to talking?’
They were alone; Bran and Soraya had disappeared outside on some task, and she had no reason to refuse. ‘Of course.’ She went to sit beside Mallory on a long bench, one of the few unbroken pieces of furniture.
‘What was Vallis saying to you?’
‘She asked if I would go north with her, and stay until her father dies and she can come back.’ Asher looked down at her lap. ‘She knows you must return to Venture to take Avorian’s place in Council; by the time he reaches the city he’ll be outcast, his men will spread the news.’
‘Will you go?’
‘I don’t know.’
He hesitated, then cleared his throat. ‘If you came back, with me — Asher, you must have heard what I said, after the leopard attacked you — would you be my wife?’
She sighed inwardly, but forced a smile. ‘Mallory, I don’t think it would be so simple. What sort of life would be yours and mine in Venture? I would find being the wife of a city councillor intolerable, and be very bad at it; and I’m not sure that you and I could continue on the terms we are now if I became only an adjunct to you.’ She saw him nod his understanding, and was much relieved. ‘Independence is hard won, and hard to lose, too.’
‘What if I were to leave Venture? Would that be easier?’
‘Where would you go?’
‘To Fate; to the Dominus. I must, in any event, to tell him as much as I can about his daughter. She’s a remarkable person.’
‘Avori
an did so much for her,’ Asher agreed readily. ‘Despite what came after. But I don’t know, Mallory. Who would look after your own clan’s concerns?’
He gave her a quizzical look. ‘I rather thought I could leave that to Pars and my sister-in-law; she seems more interested in and better suited to the post than I, and together I have no doubt they can manage. At least then she would be sure of my intentions towards her son’s inheritance.’
Asher frowned, uncertain of her own feelings. ‘If we were younger, it would be easier,’ she said slowly. ‘I do care for you, more than for anyone, Mallory. I feel at home with you. But I’m not interested in running a household, and to be your wife would constrict my life in a way I won’t accept; it wouldn’t be your fault, but it would happen.’
‘When Vallis rules, custom may change,’ he suggested. ‘You could start a new fashion.’
‘Perhaps.’ She shook her head. ‘I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say.’
He smiled. ‘I thought that would be your answer. I know you better than you think. Don’t worry, Asher, you don’t have to decide now. But at least let me provide for you in some other way. Would you like to go home to Harrows, or to Kepesake? Or even to Fate, to see Callith? Whatever you want, name it.’
‘I wish I knew.’ She closed her eyes, sensing the myriad possibilities ahead now that she was free: but free to do what? ‘All I know is what I don’t want. I don’t want to go back to Venture, although I should like to see Essa and the others again, and I don’t want to go home to Harrows, or not yet. It’s as if this — gift — makes it more difficult to choose, not easier; I have no control over it.’
‘And what of my wants?’ Mallory asked quietly. ‘Do they count in the equation?’
‘Yes. But not if they’re a condition. Don’t you see? You ask me to share your life, but what if our positions were reversed? Would you come and share mine, leaving the rest behind?’
He shook his head in some bitterness. ‘How could I? I’m not free to make such a choice.’ But she thought he did regret it. ‘Let me buy Harrows from you; you can buy it back, if you ever want to, at the same price. That would give you financial independence.’
Asher put her hand on his arm. ‘You’re a poor sort of merchant, but the best kind of friend. But if I accepted money from you, it would never be the same. I would always know, and resent it; and so would you, in time.’
‘Stiff-necked woman!’
She laughed. ‘Would-be autocrat!’ He laughed, too, both united in disagreement. ‘Seriously, I’m not sure I want anything to change between us yet.’ She coloured, embarrassed. ‘What we have — what is love between a man and woman? It seems to me so often like a power-game, an endless round of compromise or a battle for domination which no one truly wins. You and I are both strong-willed, both accustomed to having our way. Friendship seems to offer greater potential for acceptance.’
‘Friendship is love; more so, I think, than the passion so many mistake for love. But children, Ash,’ he asked quietly. ‘Have you no desire to be a mother?’
‘Not like most women, no,’ she said, surprising him. ‘I am Asher first, and female only second. One day perhaps. But I have no yearning for children now.’ She bit her lip in amusement, finding it surprisingly easy to discuss such matters with him. ‘Can you imagine a daughter of ours, Mallory? What a difficult child she would be!’
He nodded. ‘I’ve a dreadful feeling she would take after you,’ he said seriously; but when she looked at him his eyes gleamed with humour.
For an instant, Asher had a glimpse into the future possibility of just such a daughter, a girl with Mallory’s looks, clear, intelligent eyes and a determined expression; then it faded. Shaken, she said: ‘No,’ but without conviction; it had been so real.
‘Tomorrow morning we reach the border.’ He yawned. ‘I’m sorry. I suppose every decent diviner in the Dominion will know how events have changed by now, that Vallis has been found.’
‘You’re not angry? That I haven’t said yes?’
‘Avorian would say marriage was the only way for a man to have sons, to plant his stake in the future,’ Mallory said in answer. ‘But for me — I made a mistake when I was young, marrying a woman I didn’t love nor even know. In those days I valued a pretty face and figure above liking and respect, never thinking what it would be like to spend a lifetime with a woman for whom I had no real regard. But I forgive Melanna now, and even feel some pity for her. There are other children in my clan — I’m not so arrogant as to believe the world will not survive without a replica of myself.’
Yet behind his outward composure, Asher sensed he was not so very different from other men, that he would like a son, even if he denied it to himself, and she felt herself withdraw from him a little; not because there was anything unreasonable in such a wish, but because of its implications for herself.
A child — something to tie me down, never to be free again; and Mallory would see me as dependent on him, no more his equal and an independent person but a mother.
Bran and Soraya returned at that moment, and Asher was glad of the interruption. She had to make her decision before morning, and she still had no clear idea of which it would be. The only certainty was that whichever path she chose, there would be loss.
Epilogue
A light snow had frosted the land overnight, but the day dawned to a sparkling perfection that lifted the spirits of the trio who rode through the early-morning toward the river. The cold air was intoxicating, and, as the sun rose on a world that was only white and shadow, they might almost have believed themselves the only living creatures stirring in the empty land.
Only a few twisted trees obscured the wide vista of dazzling white; ahead, the river flowed silver and gold in the sunlight, deceptively innocent. Beyond it, the flat plain gave way to the mountains of Saffra, soaring, spiked peaks that had an air of remote indifference, as if they viewed the world from a great distance, removed by time as well as space from the frantic passions that moved those whose lives were measured in mere tens of years and not millennia. The sight was both humbling and uplifting at the same time, possessing an arcane beauty that calmed the mind and senses so it was possible to feel no care could weigh so heavily as to burden the heart unduly; love, hatred, fear, all were ephemeral, less than real.
As they approached the river, in the distance Mallory noticed a troop of grey men patrolling along the nearside bank, their massive horses lifting up their feet fastidiously from the thin layer of snow, but when he pointed them out to Asher, she displayed no undue concern.
‘We have papers, and bear no slave-marks. They’ll move on soon. This section of the river is supposed to be uncrossable.’
She was proved correct by the time they reached the river, for the troop was gone, their trail leading west, towards the higher reaches of the Saff.
It was the widest river Mallory had ever seen, more than a thousand feet across and, when he descended the bank to dip his fingers in the water, ice-cold. He looked at the far side in bafflement, unable to see how it was possible to get across, for the current was swift, and from the darkness at the centre the river was deep.
‘For seven months of the year, the Saff is frozen,’ Asher told him. ‘We cross on sledges.’
‘But now?’ There were one or two small rowing boats moored along the bank, obviously for use in fishing the near shallows, but not suitable for the crossing.
‘You’ll see.’ Asher dismounted and stood on the bank, her gaze fixed on the mountains. Vallis joined her.
‘It looks deserted,’ she said softly. ‘As if no one had ever lived there — could ever live there.’
‘The Saff live deep inside the mountains.’ Asher turned to smile at the younger woman. ‘They’ll know we’re here. They keep a constant watch for travellers.’
‘But I can’t see anyone.’
‘Nor any barrier,’ agreed Mallory, coming to stand beside them.
‘It stretches along the centre of the river
,’ Asher explained. ‘And you can’t see it. It’s like a barrier of will, a sort of protective charm that keeps out anyone the Saff consider unworthy to enter their land.’
‘How does it work?’ Mallory was intrigued rather than sceptical.
‘The Saff are a collective people. I can’t explain precisely. They have a kind of aggregate sight; they have a communal as well as individual awareness, and use it to maintain this barrier.’ She could not explain it more clearly. ‘It works. Mylla once told me about a slave-woman who tried to cross, and the barrier didn’t lift, though she tried — it was winter — a dozen times. Mylla had to leave her here, and found out later that the Saff had discovered she had murdered a child in her care.’
‘How did they know?’ Vallis inquired, interested.
‘In some fashion the Saff can see inside your mind, and know whether you represent a danger to their society. In their country they don’t deal with lawbreakers as we do, but put the offender into a kind of tranced sleep until they’re cured of whatever illness of mind made them act wrongly.’
Vallis shivered. ‘I should hate to be judged so.’
‘What’s that?’ Mallory had noticed something coming towards them from the far bank, a boat such as he had never seen before, drawn by two white-antlered beasts that seemed to pay no heed to the powerful current, bisecting the water in a neat, straight line.
‘They’re called alluvair, a sort of Saff ox, but they have very long forelegs and short hind legs, and are covered in thick white hair,’ Asher answered. ‘They’re immensely strong swimmers, but the Saff use them for travelling on the mountain slopes, too, although they’re not very easy to ride.’
‘Why are there no people?’ Vallis asked again. ‘I thought — ’
‘The Saff keep away from our side; only their ambassadors ever cross the river.’
For a time they watched in silence as the boat drew closer to the bank. It was of no particular design, having a square stern and a high, pointed bow which seemed to serve no specific function. Other than the beasts, it possessed no means of forward movement, for there were no oars, no rudder nor paddles; it was painted white, and had room for perhaps six travellers.