by Heinzer, HB
At some point, the thoughts racing through Adam's mind slowed enough that he was able to nod off. The sound of his sister's voice startled him awake, and he immediately felt terrible for sleeping while he was supposed to be keeping his eyes and ears open for anything suspicious.
“Sorry, guess I fell asleep,” he said sheepishly as Julia made her way to the coffee pot. She looked like hell. He wanted to give her a hug and let her know it would all be okay, but he was afraid anywhere he touched her would hurt. “You sure know how to make things exciting, don't you?”
“That's me,” she sighed, “Miss Excitement.”
If you could ignore the discolored skin on Julia's face and her tentative movements, you wouldn't know anything was wrong with her. He admired that about his sister, her ability to bury any pain she was feeling and move on with her life. He knew it was a front, but it separated her from most women who consciously chose to wear their pain like a badge in hopes of garnering sympathy.
That thought made him realize just how similar Julia and Carly were. They both worried about everyone else more than themselves. They were willing to pack away whatever they were feeling if it meant helping someone else.
“What are you smiling about?” Julia asked as she poured two cups of coffee.
“Nothing,” he lied. He and Carly had made the decision, together this time that they weren't going to tell anyone they were a couple, and he wasn't going to go against that decision.
“You're a horrible liar,” Julia laughed. “But I'll let you get away with it for now. Come on; let's go outside so that we don't wake anyone.”
Adam let Julia lead the conversation as they sat on the rickety swing on her front porch afraid he'd crack if she asked again about the stupid smile he was trying to keep off his face. He couldn't help it; in just a few hours, the one person he wanted to be with would be in town.
For over an hour, Adam and Julia sat on the porch talking about things they'd been avoiding for years. They had never dealt with their mother abandoning them for another man. Between their mother leaving and the end of her relationship with Micah, Julia had run off and not looked back for nearly a decade. It was going to take more than one conversation to resolve their issues and Adam was relieved when she turned the conversation to Caleb and the parallels between his situation and their own.
While Karen hadn't abandoned her son for someone else, she had still abandoned him. Julia worried about how Caleb, Micah's son, was handling the news that his mom was back in town. Her strained relationship with the boy seemed normal given the fact that Julia had only recently found out about his existence. But in true Julia fashion, she worried about what the drama among the adults was going to do to him.
When the conversation started to fade, Julia excused herself saying she needed to try to take a shower. Adam returned to the dining room, hoping for a chance to talk to Micah about how they could keep Karen from a repeat performance. After glancing at his phone at least a dozen times, he startled when it vibrated against the hardwood table.
Carly: I'll be there in 20. Can you sneak out for a few?
The text message had Adam jumping from his seat. He and Micah were getting nowhere, and Adam was glad for a reason to get out of the house.
The truth was, Micah's ex was unstable, probably hopped up on drugs and still out there. Not only that, but she had someone helping her. The fact that they didn't know who was helping her made it that much more difficult to keep Julia safe.
“Hey man, I'm going to grab some lunch,” Adam said. It wasn't a total lie. He'd run to the sub shop, pick up lunch for everyone, get a kiss or six from his girl and head back.
“Yeah, should probably get something for the girls too,” Micah responded not looking up from his phone. He'd been having problems making eye contact all day, consumed with guilt over what happened.
Adam placed his hand firmly on Micah's shoulder. “It's not your fault. I wish it were so that I could pound the piss out of you, but you didn't do this to Jules. If it makes you feel better, I suppose I could take you out back since you were a stupid bastard when you were a kid, and that's the only reason Karen is in our lives at all.”
“Thanks for the reminder,” Micah grumbled. When his shoulders slumped forward even further, Adam felt terrible for giving the guy a hard time. Micah was beating himself up enough; he didn't need Adam throwing old mistakes in his face.
“Hey man,” Adam said, “knock it off. Julia doesn't need to see you moping and shit. We all love the hell out of Caleb, so I guess we have to forgive you for the bitch too. It'll be okay.”
Micah finally looked up. “What time is Carly coming in?” he asked knowingly.
Adam debated playing dumb for a minute, but as his sister pointed out, he sucked at lying. “You can't say shit to Julia, man. Carly's all freaked that she's going to be upset about it.”
Listening to his own words, not only was he a lovesick pansy, he was also apparently pussy whipped. Now Micah knew. Wonderful.
Micah sat there shaking his head in disbelief. “You got it bad, huh?” he laughed, “Don't worry, I won't tell her. And I won't tell Carly that you just spilled your guts like a little girl.”
Times like this made Adam realize that Micah wasn't a bad guy. He just hoped Micah would keep his mouth shut like he said he would.
“So, when's she getting here?” Micah asked again. Adam wanted to slap the smirk off Micah's face, but it was amusing to see his spirits lifted, even at Adam's expense.
“Dude, why do you think I'm going to get lunch?” Adam laughed. “We're going to meet there for a few minutes and then she'll be over. You can't say a fucking word to anyone, Micah. I'm serious.”
Micah held up his hands in surrender, “Easy there, Buttercup. I told you your secret's safe with me. But you'd better get a grip or everyone's gonna know anyway as soon as you get back.”
Adam grabbed his keys off the counter and turned to the door. He hated it when Micah was right almost as much as he hated feeling like a giddy little girl. No, he hated Micah being right more.
“Hey Adam,” Micah called from the front door as Adam bounded across the lawn, “She's a good girl. Take care of her.”
“I plan to,” Adam sighed ducking into the driver's seat.
***
Being back in Brooklyn for the first time in years was nerve-wracking. It shouldn't be since this always would be home, but it was. Of course, part of that had to do with the gorgeous blue-eyed man walking across the parking lot as Carly leaned against her rental car, wringing her hands.
“Hey Peanut,” Adam said wrapping both arms tightly around Carly's waist. She looked around nervously, trying to make sure no one spotted them together. She knew if someone saw them, word would reach Julia before they could get to her house, and that was something Carly desperately wanted to avoid.
“Miss me much?” She laughed, placing a kiss on his cheek. It was nowhere near what she wanted to do, but it was as far she was willing to go in public.
Adam nodded. “Only every day. Let's go get lunch and head back to the house before they send a search party after me.”
They walked across the empty parking lot where they'd met at Subtown, bumping shoulders and poking one another along the way. To anyone passing by, it would look like two friends enjoying each other's company rather than lovers who were trying to play it cool.
By the time they walked back to the cars, Carly regretted her insistence that they keep their relationship a secret from everyone. It was going to be hard to live a lie when they were in public. Plus, they were adults. Why should it matter? Wouldn't their friends be happy that they'd found one another, and they were happy?
There were two things stopping Carly from telling Adam she'd changed her mind.
First, she wasn't going to turn into the girl who waffled on her decisions. Carly always stuck by what she said, whether it was right or wrong. To keep flip-flopping back and forth on something so significant would make Adam feel like she was uns
ure of everything.
Second, she wasn't going to risk a Julia meltdown if she found out. Julia had always been the most emotional of the trio of friends, and she'd been through a world of shit since coming back to Wisconsin. Yes, there was the off chance that she would be happy for them, and it would take her mind off things, but that would be out of character for Julia.
No, they'd just have to find a way to get through the next few days stealing moments when they could get away from everyone. If she could find a way to make it work, maybe she'd stay at Adam's instead of at Gran's so she could still have the nights with her man.
“How's Jules holding up?” Carly felt like a crap friend for not asking sooner. She couldn't imagine what Julia was feeling.
Adam shrugged. “She's holding up, I guess. We talked for a while this morning, and she's trying to downplay everything. I know that's crap because her eyes kept darting around like she was waiting for someone to jump out of the bushes.”
“I don't blame her. Are you sure we should go to the dance tonight?” The annual all-class reunion street dance was the entire reason Carly had come home. She didn't want to miss it, but she would do whatever was best for her friend.
“Honestly, I don't think we should go. It would be easy for Karen and whoever was with her to blend in with so many people there. Not knowing who was working with her makes it that much worse.”
“So why don't we all go out to dinner and chill for the night?” It wasn't ideal, but Carly could tell Adam was going to be pissy all day if they didn't change their plans.
Adam shook his head. “Nope, I think if I bring it up again, Annie's gonna have my balls in a vice. She was pissed when she heard me and Micah talking about not going. We'll just have to make the best of it. You remember what Karen looks like, right?”
Carly nodded.
“Okay, well we're all gonna have to watch out for her. And I need you to stay right by Julia as much as possible unless Micah and Annie are right there. In that case, I fully expect you to sneak off and find me.”
Carly laughed at the thought of the two of them sneaking around like horny teens. The entire situation honestly was quite ridiculous.
“You know, I never liked that woman, but I really can't stand her now.” It was selfish, but most of Carly's loathing of Karen centered on the fact that she now had to pretend as if she was not falling head over heels for Adam. “How can one person screw things up for so many people for so long?”
Adam opened Carly's car door and then pulled her into his arms. “It'll be okay. Hopefully we get a call from Eric Andrews saying they caught her, and there will be nothing to worry about.”
Before moving out of the way so she could get in her car, Adam leaned over to kiss her. The feel of his rough lips against hers drove out every thought from her mind. She didn't care who drove by. She didn't care who knew about them. She only knew she didn't want him to stop. Her lips parted allowing his tongue to dip into her mouth. When she felt him hesitate, Carly deepened the kiss. That was the moment she knew she was a goner. She was falling absolutely in love with Adam Sanders.
Chapter Seven
Carly waited in the parking lot for five minutes before starting the car so that no one would question her getting to Julia's house at the same time as Adam. That was a good thing because she needed a few minutes to compose herself after their kiss. Never before had a man affected her so deeply just by kissing her. Once her heart rate was back to normal, Carly turned the car out of the parking lot and headed down Main Street.
There was no time to think about Adam once Carly got to her friend's house. He ushered her up the stairs as soon as she walked through the door and thrust her into what would prove to be the most challenging makeup job she'd ever attempted. She was thankful she made it a point to befriend as many people as possible behind the scenes on the shows she worked on because Vixen was one of the best when it came to covering marks and had been all too happy to teach Carly.
As she walked up the stairs, Carly reminded herself that she couldn't let on that she knew the entire situation already. As far as Annie and Julia knew, she was walking into a shit storm without warning. Although she had confidence in her acting skills, it wasn't something she liked doing in her personal life. She hated the fact that so much of her trip to Wisconsin was turning into one huge lie.
“Holy shit, girl! What happened to you?” Carly hoped her reaction to seeing Julia was believable. She was genuinely shocked at just how awful Julia's face looked so maybe there was enough true emotion that no one would question her.
Julia proceeded to ramble about what happened and how none of this would have happened if she hadn't moved back to Wisconsin. It killed Carly to hear the misery in her friend's voice.
As the conversation went on, Carly realized just how deep her lies this weekend were going to run. Annie and Julia had no clue that Carly knew everything about the attack, about Julia and Micah trying to decide if they were going to take another shot at their relationship or anything else.
“Wait a flipping minute; Karen's back in town? You and Micah? What in the hell's been going on around here?” Thank God I was a theater major. This weekend's going to suck big time.
Annie flopped back on the bed and started explaining everything that had happened since Julia had come back to town. Listening to her talk made Carly homesick. She wished she lived closer and could be going through all of this with her friends. There was no one in New York that she could fall into such a comfortable conversation with, not even her roommate because she was rarely ever home. Now, Annie and Julia were reconnecting and Carly would eventually be the odd man out.
“Oh, and the best part,” Annie squealed, “that first night... Julia thought Caleb was yours!”
Carly's hands dropped to her sides in shock. “You what?” She wondered how in the world Julia could have thought she would have stooped so low as to sleep with Micah.
After what he did to Julia the summer after graduation, no amount of alcohol or desperation could have made her do something like that. And if she had, Julia should have known better than to think she would have abandoned her child the way her own parents had abandoned her. That would never happen.
Julia sheepishly explained how she came to her assumption about Micah and Carly, and it made sense on some level. It was a bit odd to know that Gran took care of Caleb and had accepted him as her own grandchild. Now that Micah had grown up and proven himself a responsible adult, she was glad he was there to help Gran when she wasn't.
When Carly finished her makeup magic, no one could see the physical evidence of Julia's attack. She'd look a little out of place wearing long sleeves since it was supposed to be a warm night, but she didn't have to worry about anyone seeing the bruises.
As Carly bounded down the staircase with her two best friends, it was easy to remember the things she loved about living in Brooklyn. If there were more opportunities here to remain involved in theater and still pay the bills, then she could almost see herself drawn back to the small town life. As an eighteen year old, living in a town of five thousand seemed like a prison sentence. Now, there was something comforting about being home.
She knew she'd be lying to herself if she didn't admit Adam also played a part in her feelings. Being in Wisconsin would mean more time with him. It would mean having a better idea of when she would see him because he wouldn't have to work so hard to find reasons to get to her. It would mean doing something she swore she would never do, sacrificing her sense of self for someone else.
It was hard to maintain distance from Adam as everyone relaxed in Julia's living room. As much as she tried to stay involved in the conversation, she felt like the outsider. Everyone was talking about life in Wisconsin: who was seeing whom, who got a new job, who was getting married, who died. This type of conversation used to induce eye rolls when they were all kids, and it was the adults carrying on. Feeling like she was watching a group of strangers, Carly excused herself to the kitchen.
&nb
sp; “Hey, you okay?” It didn't take thirty seconds for Adam to follow her into the other room. She could tell he was trying to keep his distance, and she hated it. She was being stupid and seeing him leaning against the doorframe when all she wanted was for him to wrap his strong arms around her solidified that point.
“Yeah, it's just a little weird.” She hated knowing that part of the tension was her own fault. She was the one who chose to keep the truth from her friends, meaning she had to keep her guard up so that she didn't slip.
Adam walked behind her and pressed his lips to her hair. “What's going on?” He reached for her shoulders, turning her to face him. It was hard to resist those expressive blue eyes, currently filled with worry and doubt. Carly hated knowing that she was the cause of at least part of his turmoil.
“I just...” Carly stopped herself, trying to figure out what she could say that wouldn't put her in a deeper hole. “I feel like I don't fit in with them anymore. I mean, it was all right when we were all upstairs, but now it's like I'm the friend of a friend at a party. You all stayed so close, and I'm off on my own.”
“It's not like that unless you make it that way. Julia's only been back for a week, and she's one of the people out there that you're saying stayed close to everyone. Think about that for a minute; could anything be further from the truth? Come back out and have fun with us.” Adam tightened his embrace, chastely brushing his lips against hers.
“Hey you two, get a room or something.” Micah's nonchalance surprised Carly, and she jumped out of Adam's arms. “It's okay Carly, I heard Adam talking to you last night. I know,” he whispered before heading to the fridge to grab a beer.
“Please don't say anything.” It seemed foolish to keep up the lie knowing that Micah knew the truth, but she had to ride this out now that she'd committed.