The moon was in its first quarter. Just enough for them to see their way. Before they set off, Monty warned them to wrap everything so that nothing rattled. Off they went, a silent convoy of four characters with loaded wheelbarrows, moving from shadow to shadow, backing out of sight whenever someone else was about. Slowly but successfully they made their way to Fairly Fullon’s house, Bortontick, at Sale. There they made sure the barrows were fully covered, and well and truly hidden in the overgrown bushes within Fullon’s grounds.
Having checked and satisfied that nobody in the house was any the wiser, again in single file and just as cautiously, they trotted silently all the way back to the café in Diddling. At the cafe Josh did the honours and invited everybody to a cold snack and then turned the place into an impromptu bed and breakfast.
76 PLENTY OF THINGS BEGIN
Next morning at first light, Commander Button arrived back at the secret observation post. He had with him the six burly Labradors of the crack Police Riot Squad and a second runner. All of them were trying to cram into the OP. Out of sheer necessity, the more delicate greyhounds stayed outside at the back.
The Commander had no idea what the bloodhound could be doing by turning up at the scene. Certainly, the hound was the one who had tracked the kidnappers to Horn’s den. But what was Fustian Lump doing back there? Was he playing both sides of the fence? Was he snooping, swapping sides or what?
Button tried to scratch behind his ear with a foot but in the crowded space succeeded only in knocking over a detective so gave up the attempt.
Whatever Fustian Lump was doing, Operation Overlady was threatening to become Operation Underdog at any moment. The Police boss could only assume that at the very least, Lump was not to be trusted. The possibility that the bloodhound would inform Horn that the Police were even now outside his door was alarming to say the least. Only the continued relative calm from the Horn place told him that the hound had not given the game away.
But if not, why not? Why would he not only go back to the lion’s den, but actually enter it? Could Fustian Lump be playing The Great Rescuer all by himself? What was he doing?
Again, Commander Button was constrained to wait. He had six large, purpose built, highly disciplined, extremely fit, fully equipped Labradors panting very close behind him in a most confined space, and he had to wait. It was not long before Button almost fought his way out of the cramped observation post. He needed fresh air. Once outside, with two greyhounds staring at him, Button took stock and deep breaths.
For his part he had not been idle. On his return to Headquarters he had obtained a search warrant. He knew that without evidence to proceed with a kidnapping charge, Horn could stop pursuit by simply saying he was now married and legit. And the arson charge and all that stuff didn’t cover the business with the girl any way. But if Horn got difficult, a search warrant looking for stolen goods would gain entry. Then he could separate the girl from Horn, get her version of the story - and of course, any stolen goods actually found would be a bonus. His next worry was opportunity. Should he wait for it to happen? Or should he create it?
________________
Meanwhile inside Plenty, Horn was not really up and about, but he was at least up and pacing about, pondering his options and muttering aloud to himself. Should he hold on to Lump until after auctioning the girl?
“Like for instance, get ’em all salveratin’ over the prospect? Like, use one to spruik the next - wait their appetite for a second event? Or... Or what? What’d be really good is to do the pair at the same time! Yeah! One big giant auction!”
But that means I got to get there an’ tell ’em first! Got to... Got to advertise. Advertise! O’Course! Yeah, but... OK... If I rush up there? They’d say, ‘Where’s the evidence?’ Yeah... So not on my own. Ooh, no. Gotta prove it.
Yeah! Of course! Dangle the bait! Take ’im up and show ’em! And then – Ooo! A Combined Auction! Oohoohoo...! “Think of the payout! This is genius stuff!” With Horn’s thoughts exploding into words, he barked orders.
“Blowback! Hardly! Get Lump! We’re going north! Now!”
Lump was prodded into activity and brought upstairs to face Horn, whereupon he got a curt, no nonsense, “There’s a job for you further north. They will pay a lot,” from Horn who’d had enough with the small talk.
It all sounded good to Fustian. He of course had no way of knowing that ‘a lot’ would be going to Horn, not him. Or, that he was the item for sale.
________________
Commander Button was outside at the back of the hide still getting his needed fresh air when told that Horn was on the move. He squeezed past the troops once again just in time to see all four of the Horn party disappear northwards. Button instructed a greyhound.
“Party of four up the road there. Follow them. Keep out of sight. Silent Approach. If they keep going for a further five minutes, race back, await further instructions outside their hideaway. If they’re not going anywhere, back here on the double! Any questions? Go!”
A long wait. Then they saw the runner hurtling back as instructed and skid to a halt at Horn’s entrance.
“Right Chaps, listen up.” Said Button, “We’re going in. Search the place. Full recce. No dawdling. Find the girl. Report her condition. Assume the worst. I want us out of there, with the girl unharmed, in five minutes. Questions? Go!”
77 FINAL PREPARATIONS
At break of day at the café, Monty was up before his friends and thinking about the day ahead. He wanted to check out down by the river at Sale. A place there would solve a couple of problems. After that he would visit his bank to replenish his wallet. And then would come the waiting.
Josh spoke quietly behind him. “D’you think we should make use of James again for tonight? Wouldn’t that help?”
Monty turned and they both went into the kitchen, walking round the still sleeping Max and James.
“That would be fantastic, Josh. He can be a help to all of us. Brilliant idea. Hey,” Monty continued, “You better let him get home and square it with his mum though. Did she know he was with us all last night?”
“I’ve already got a large biscuit cake for him to take home as a peace offering,” said Josh, “and I’ll pay him in advance for all the overtime. I can do that, since you put so much down for the job yesterday. That’s worked out very well, all thanks to you.”
“No problem,” said Monty, “This is my project after all. Listen, can you send James as soon as possible? I’ve been thinking. First, I need to see around the riverbank at Sale. We’ll need a staging area, so we need to find the right location down there. Then, I’ve thought of something else. You know, we can’t all just stand in the road waiting for Fullon to trot past us, so if we’ve got somewhere down at the river, we could wait there. But then we’ll still need a scout watching to see -”
“To give the alert as soon as he does go. Good thinking.” Max said, coming into the kitchen. Max had another thought as James followed him in, “Didn’t you want James and Collin round at your parents’ place to help with Fullon?”
“Oh. Yes.” Monty addressed the lad, “Hey, James.”
“Yes, Mr Stump?”
“How did the invitation go? Did you give it direct to Mr Fullon?”
“Oh, I’m pretty sure it was Mr Fullon who took it.”
The others waited for him to continue.
“The door opened, and this gent stuck his head round. I gave him the message just like you said.”
“And?” asked Monty.
“Oh, quick as anything. Um, he just, like grabbed it and slammed the door.”
Monty and Josh looked at each other and laughed. “That’d be right!”
W... Was that all right?” Asked James.
“You did very well, thanks, James,” Monty said. “Listen, how many brothers and sisters have you got? Anyone at least as old as Collin?”
“Daniella? She’s the same age as us, Mr Stump.”
“Ah. Yes, you did say. Sorry. D’
you think she and Collin would mind spending an evening at my place with my mum and dad?”
“Er, doing what? They’d need something to do, Mr Stump.”
“Yes, of course. Let’s see. Greet one crazy gent at the door. Serve him the odd drink off a tray. Take turns with the tray, maybe. Not much else, really. Oh, and wear a party hat. Any party hats at home? If so, they should bring ’em. Wear ’em. Oh. And, um, tell them the pay’s good.”
“What time, should they be there, Mr Stump?”
“Six O’clock sharp. I should imagine they would be free to go home within three hours?” Monty looked at Josh and continued, “I’m betting by that time, he’ll have either stormed off or be zonked out.” He turned back to James and asked, “What d’ you think?”
“For sure, Mr Stump, they’ll be stoked.” Said James.
“OK,” cut in Joshua, “James, big cake, middle shelf in the pantry? Thank you, James. Put it on the table here. Good. Now, here’s also your overtime. Take all of that home, and don’t forget to ask about Collin and Daniella.”
“Ahhem,” Josh coughed to get James’ attention again before the boy struggled out of the door with everything. “Could you also ask your good mum if she could spare you for a second night. You’ve got additional overtime there for that purpose.”
“If your mum wants a reason,” Max spoke up, “Tell her that all this is to help conclude a special project currently being undertaken by our good friend Montague Stump designed to correct an unfortunate error he’s discovered in the dispensation of an essential aspect in the operation of his estate.”
After a stunned silence, Monty kept a straight face and asked, “James, could you repeat that message back to us?”
James came back and carefully put the cake and money on the table again to help his thinking. Then he said with just a hint of uncertainty,
“Cause Mr Stump wants help at home?”
“Brilliant!” Cried Monty. “Give him a pay rise!”
“Well done, James.” Said Josh, “unfortunately this extra money won’t last, but we will see about a rise, any road. Could you be back as soon as you can? There’ll be more to do.”
“Will do, Mr Nunt. Mum’ll be, you know, um, thank you, um.” James made good his exit, at once overwhelmed by the generosity towards his family and bubbling with pride over everything he was bringing home.
Soon after that, Monty and Max left Josh busy doing his café thing while waiting for cousin Fatty Nurdle. Still not wanting to be seen by Fairly Fullon even though it was most unlikely, the two trotted round the long way to Sale riverfront to decide on a suitable spot for later use.
They found a rather idyllic looking area that would certainly suit them. From there they worked their way back to the place Fullon called Bortontick, and then established the easiest run between the two. Finally, they doubled checked the spot they had picked out by the river. The place chosen was perfect for picnics and swimming with easy river access. It was currently in use by a family of ducks with their young running in and out of the water. By nightfall they reckoned the place would be deserted.
After that they studied where best to put James to get a guaranteed view of Fullon leaving Bortontick for High Aytus, but a spot where Fullon would have difficulty in seeing James. Once that was organised, they set off for Monty’s bank, and finally ended up back at the cafe with Monty’s wallet again fully loaded.
At the café, they found James had returned so Max took him to Sale. First he showed him where he could watch for their ‘target’, then took him on to where everybody would be at the riverside waiting for his report. And then from there, once James arrived with his message ‘target sighted and on his way’, the fun would start. All four of them would race round to begin their assault on Bortontick.
When everybody was back at the café, they settled in the kitchen to wait. It wasn’t long before Fatty Nurdle turned up. The fact that he promptly chased everyone out of the kitchen was Fatty’s way of showing he was experienced. He had subbed for Josh before, so Josh was relaxed about his somewhat rude take-over manner. Dutifully, they moved into the dining area to continue their wait.
78 THE RESCUE
Up in the Clumps, the raid on Plenty went without a hitch. Diana Vulcan McLeash was found in what seemed to be a cell in utter darkness. Brought up into the light, she was checked over briefly by a medic specialist trooper who gave her the all-clear to travel subject to a strict regime of rest breaks, food, water and a severe limit on her top speed for the duration. Horn’s kitchen was raided. She was allowed one bite and five gulps. Then, with a trooper supporting her either side, they were off. Time taken, less than five minutes.
Immediately out, they headed for town. On the run, Button issued orders. He dispatched a runner with instructions to race to an ex-colleague, Magnus Opum, asking him if he wouldn’t mind helping with a little problem at HQ.
The second runner was to wait in the hide with the two detectives, and to race back to HQ as soon as it was obvious Horn was coming to find the girl. A relief team would be sent to the hide in due course to relieve the current shift.
The rescue party kept up the pace with two troopers still supporting the very weak vixen. They established a fixed regime all the way back. Every twenty minutes they stopped for two minutes to administer a bit more food, increase her water intake and provide modesty breaks as needed for the young lady.
At each stop, perimeter guards were posted but there was no sign of being followed. This routine was maintained until they reached HQ where a relief team was sent to replace those still at the hide. An internal medical unit whisked Diana off for a complete examination before anyone could start trying to debrief her.
Commander Button commended the squad, stood them down and went to his office. Expecting Magnus Opum to be there, he was disappointed, but he knew he didn’t have the right to be annoyed by the absence. After all, the fellow was retired and had his own life to lead now.
Instead, he wondered what to do without Opum. There was nowhere for Miss McLeash to stay at HQ. He didn’t want to risk allowing her to go home or even letting her family know her whereabouts until more was known about her abduction and who Horn was working for.
Until then she needed a safe house. Failing anything from Opum, worst case scenario would be for him to take her to his home. However, he was happily married and Diana McLeash was very, very attractive. He made a note to ask the medic specialist trooper who’d brought the girl in if she wouldn’t mind being on stand-by for some rather uninteresting chaperone duties. Couldn’t be too careful.
________________
Magnus “Titch” Opum was a dachshund, and the recently retired Superintendent of Detectives at Diddling. He had made more contacts over his career than a hedgehog at a country dance. He was at a lodge meeting. His wife had thanked the greyhound, left a note on her husband’s desk and gone back to digging up old bones in their extensive garden. The last time she had done that, they had enjoyed a remarkable osso bucco that they had both remembered with fondness for weeks.
Magnus Opum didn’t get the message for several hours.
79 PLENTY OF TROUBLE
In the early afternoon, Horn, complete with Lump and his two offsiders Blowback and Skinner appeared on the horizon. They made their way slowly closer and disappeared into Plenty, as Horn called his home in the Clumps. In the Police observation post, the two detectives started taking a proper interest in things once again. The greyhound messenger slept on. As likely to trigger a demarcation dispute as anything else, greyhound runners were not paid to look through windows.
When nothing immediate seemed to happen, the two detectives themselves were soon dozing off again.
Inside Plenty, Horn totally lost it. But like all good things, that condition started slowly and took time to reach full bloom. He was tired and cranky. Nothing serious. Nothing that a good siesta wouldn’t cure. But he had to get ready for the big auction tomorrow. And he’d have to feed both of his new guests,
he supposed, and get them all tarted up and looking good for when he led them out into the sale yard. But not now. He’d had enough. Later. Yes. He’d give the word later for the meal. First, he sent the two others off to lock up Lump again and to check and report on Diana. Then he settled on his couch ready for a sleep.
After quite a while, he woke up to the fact that they had not reported back to him. Not only that, they were remarkably quiet. Calling them simply produced a lot of whispering. Calling them again turned the quiet whispering to surprisingly energetic hushing and shushing noises. This was doubly annoying. He’d never get anything done at that rate, let alone get his sleep. Now he was cranky and got off his couch and went to investigate.
Down the hall were Skinner and Blowback. Skinner had a look that seemed identical to terror. His back legs were trembling so much that they were beating a light tattoo on the ground. This reminded Horn of someone desperate for a pee. From the drumming on the floor and the look of terror, Horn deduced the shower was imminent.
What is the matter with him? was Horn’s thunderous thought, He needs someone to tell him when to take a toilet break? Horn was losing his patience fast. But he had the presence of mind to keep out of Skinner’s line of fire.
Meanwhile, Burt Blowback had been towering over Skinner. When Horn arrived, he shrank to a submissive pose beside his mate and looked at his own feet as if seeing them for the first time in his life.
“What?” Fumed ‘Hammerhead’ Horn.
Making a valiant attempt, Skinner started quite well. “She...” but then he ran out of words. “Heee!” was all he managed. This sounded like a comment from someone about to enter the wacky world of hysteria.
For clarification Horn turned to Blowback, who suddenly had a brainwave. “Juzgoddafinederboss!” He blurted, bashing his mate Skinner into a spin as he bolted down the corridor. Skinner, knocked free from under Horn’s withering stare, desperately scrabbled for traction as he took off in pursuit. Horn himself made an executive decision. He’d find out for himself what the hell was happening.
A Tour de Fate Page 23