“I’m so sorry James. They found his body yesterday. He was only a few hundred yards from where you had your accident. They think he may have had prescription drugs in his system.”
James does not need to bother asking how it happened. He already knows. He was there when it happened. When he saw him at the crossroad, he had already taken the lethal dosage of pills. That is why he looked and acted the way he did. The drugs were already taking hold of his nervous system. His muscles were beginning to spasm, he was cramping up, and he lost his balance. If James were able to see another twenty yards around the bend, he would have seen Dale trip over a crack in the pavement. He would have seen him fall and strike the side of his head, knocking him unconscious. The angle at which Dale fell would have meant he lay on his back. The immediate after effect of his concussion would have triggered Dale to vomit. His unconscious state, combined with the depression of his central nervous system would have meant that Dale could neither swallow, nor expel the liquid in his throat. This meant Dale choked on his own vomit and suffocated to death.
Though it would have taken over two minutes for his heart to stop beating, Dale was completely unaware of his suffering. His brain went dark and his body lay still. If James was there to see it however, he would have watched as car after car passed him by, mistaking him for a junkie lying in the street. He would have heard his short dying breaths as they faded into the wind. He would have watched his best friend die. Perhaps it is what he has done all along.
Dale was none the wiser, but he did not die alone. He had James’ thoughts and hopes with him. Though he did not hear, James called to him through the glass. He did his very best to break through. He did not turn away. He did not run. He stayed to help his friend. He was right there when it ended. James takes what little comfort there is in that fact. He puts in a box, locks it up and tosses away the key. Dale is dead. He has become another ghost in the never-ending tragedy of life. At least his death was glorious. His voice is gone. Soon his face will follow.
James, still suspended high above Navoeth, ponders what little there is for him to come home to.
“I’m sorry James,” his father’s voice echoes through the air. They are two words he has become quite accustomed to saying.
“I know he was your friend. I feel terrible that this had to happen to you again, James. And I’m sorry you had to find out this way.”
Richard’s eyes become glassy as he reaches out to put a hand on James’ chest. He feels his heart beat, much steadier than his own.
“Can you please come back to us? I miss you, son.”
His voice starts to melt behind the lump in his throat.
“Miss you too. Have to go.” James replies.
“I love you buddy.”
“You too.”
“Wake up soon?”
“I will.”
CHAPTER 30: The End of the World
James had not thought this next part through. After speaking to his father, he falls through the air, thinking this might not have been his best idea. It seemed everything would Though he learnt of Dale’s fate, he tried to tell himself that everything would be fine. But falling from a cliff is certainly not the definition of fine. So much for healthy risk-taking. Dale is dead, and James’ punishment for not reaching him in time is to suffer the same fate. He thinks of death, in all its certainty. It is all that one has left to consider whilst plummeting to earth at the speed of sound. He thinks about what it means to die in Navoeth. Would he finally wake up in his hospital bed and return to his old life? Would it mean the continuation of his body but the death of his soul? Would it mean never seeing Von again? And would that present a life so empty it would be a fate worse than death itself? The answer to every question, was yes.
In the distance, a horn emits a low, hollow drawl. A battle call to end all battles. The sky starts to thicken with golden embers. A sudden gust of wind whips up the distant fire. At the base of the burnt-out meadows, hundreds of Shadows emerge. They march side by side, painting the horizon a spectral grey. James sees them only as a blur, but he hears their footsteps through the blades of grass, and pulsing through the cliff as he falls. Slowly but surely, they approach the castle where Von has taken shelter. Even if he survives the fall, he is still miles away from helping her. Nessa was right, he should have saved the girl. James does what he always does in times of desperation. Time keeps moving, but he shuts his eyes and lets the calm was over him. James says a prayer. He prays to a dead mother, a dead friend, and a dead little brother.
This honestly can’t be it. If I fall to my death right now, not even the Dalai Lama could re-implant my soul into a creature so grand that it could justify this cruel ending. This sucks. Life sucks. But that doesn’t mean I want to check out early. I’m sorry you had to give in Dale, but if you are there somewhere in the sky, you must now see the error of your ways. Please let me do something good in your memory.
Let me live, and I swear I’ll save Von. I will bring her back to the real world. I will show her my room. I’ll show her around campus. I’ll show her around Greensboro. Then we’ll both leave, and never come back. I’ll finally go and visit the beach in Pembroke. I’ll climb the Eiffel Tower. I’ll drink wine in Tuscany. And I’ll do it all with her. We won’t stop until we run out of money or she finds a place on the map for us both to settle down. We will stay there forever. We will have kids or pick grapes or do whatever she wants me to do for the rest of my life. That is how much she means to me.
I really wish you could have met her, mum. I think you would have liked her. She makes me so happy. I was never a good son, and for that I’m sorry. At least if you let me live I can give that apology to dad in person. I always did blame him for your death. It seems so ridiculous now. I used up so much energy hating someone for something they had no control over whatsoever. Please let me live, please let me live, please.
And then? Ask to be received and you shall be. A black saviour bursts through the earth’s crust. It screams through the ember-laden sky, cutting a dagger through the driving rain. With a blood-curdling screech, it stops the entire Shadow army in their tracks. James watches as blood-red eyes seek the clouds. He feels the thrash of midnight wings as they ride the storm. A new-born bird of fire saves James once again. Only this time she is barely recognisable. Her flames have been extinguished and she has risen from the ashes, blackened but more beautiful than ever.
“Boy am I glad to see you,” he says.
James heart is racing, eager to reach Von. Eryr’s breaths are calm, steady and few and far between. She is the eye of the storm. Ahead of them lies miles of flaming countryside, as well as the army, now charging at full speed. Suddenly another horn blasts out. The battle commences, but the combatants do not approach from opposing ends of the field. They stand shoulder to shoulder. Within the Shadow Army, the soldiers begin to turn on each other. The outer edges of the infantry fly sideways, crashing into the earth. Swords slash wildly, taking down anything in their path. The entire valley fills with violence, as the roars of dying soldiers combine with clashing steel.
There is no order within the ranks. It is every monster for itself. The battle rages and fire creeps its way across the mountain. Its summit begins to shake, and it becomes apparent that its very insides are about to burst out. A black boulder shoots out and crushes down on the far side of the mountain. Smaller rocks and particles are expelled, before a bubbly glow of molten flow out. The mountain growls, as the energy cascades into a series of fiery eruptions. It shakes the entire earth, and momentarily knocks Eryr from her flight path. The shockwaves are too much for the non-destructive elements. Forests of jade, lakes of blue and rich grassy plains disintegrate. The hills are dismantled, and collapse within themselves to form huge ugly craters.
As the battle continues, a rotten smell seeps from each dying body. They shrivel up, becoming empty shells as the energy escapes them. They soon become black stains on the ground. This burning, screaming mass surrounds the entire castle. Jam
es still can’t see Von. Between the fire, the rain and the general absence of sun, nothing stands out. Eryr navigates for him. It is now that her heart beats faster. Not for fear or fatigue, but a longing; a gravitational pull towards her master. The girl James loves.
He hears her cries before she comes into view. Eryr circles above, seeking an opening in the chaos below. The main gates splinter and the battle spills into the castle grounds. A stream of blood seeps through the cracks in the ancient brickwork. Soon it becomes a torrent as the monsters hack at one another. The task becomes clear to James. Rescue Von and get out as fast as he can. This world has hit the self-destruct button.
The Shadows pay no attention to Von. Still, she is stuck between four sets of impenetrable walls, and therefore collateral damage. The castle’s interior walls have a gradual incline which acts as a vortex of sound and energy. The collective scream of death cascades through the open field, climbing the walls and toppling over the lipped turrets of the keep. It travels back down to meet the warring factions, throwing countless bodies against the walls. James hears every Shadow’s final breath as it is ripped from their lungs.
Only a dozen or so remain standing. Some continue to fight with one another, but James notices one working its way up the stone steps towards Von. The figure pulls a knife from its belt, driving the blade through any still beating chest. Eryr descends. She signals Von, drawing the gaze of this lone monster. They land beside her, and James eyes meet with a monster’s. It is The Face, with the horrible smile James has seen too many times. The tattoos are there, stretching along its arms and torso. They glint menacingly through its blood-soaked skin. The last few injured monsters finish each other off. The second to last reaches for the steps. It cannot find its feet, but still it crawls on. The Face looks to the mortally wounded beast clawing at its feet. The battered body is dragged up to the next step. As its belly scrapes over the gravelly surface, it lets out a painful bellow. The Face lifts one leg over the back of its victim. It reaches down, cups its jaw and lifts its head. It grabs the knife and smiles at James. Then without a flinch, it cuts the creature’s throat from ear to ear. A flash of twisted teeth is followed by a deep wheezy breath. It laughs so loud that Von cowers into James’ side. Eryr backs into the corner of the keep.
“You’re next,” it says.
The words send a chill through James. He feels his chest start to tighten. Knowing The Face so well, the shock of its presence doesn’t last. But whatever guts he had to defy it, now lay with the dead bodies below him. All he wants to do is grab Von and fly away from this place forever. The Face’s fingernails scratch against the brick walls, tracing a spidery path up the steps. Von grips him tighter, begging him to move. His own head tells him to do the same. His body though, disobeys his thoughts. Von’s lips are moving but James can’t hear above the ringing in his ears. Finally, she slaps him in the face. Shaken from his daze, she drags him towards Eryr.
“Let’s go, James.”
James puts Von on Eryr’s back. He is about to join her before he looks out across the valley. A swirling wind lifts the smoke for just a second. In the velvet of dusk, James sees the faintest little star. It is the first bright spot he has seen for days. It reminds him of the first day he woke up and saw the butterfly. The way that first star crawled onto his hand and danced off into the dark, there was something so magical about it. It was something so pure, so simple. It was something in this poisoned world that was truly worth saving. One star brought him into this world, and one star will help him leave it. It is all the strength he needs. In this the final hour, one single burning mass fights its own battle. It fights against infinite energy, against earth’s gravitational pull, and against all the black space in the universe. This is not James’ fight to abandon.
“I know what you’re thinking James. But I won’t let you stay here.”
She says it, and she means it, and there is only one way she’ll understand.
James asks Von, “Why do bad things happen to good people?”
“What do you mean?”
“Dale is dead, Von.”
“Oh no. James…”
“Yeah.”
“I’m sorry James, I truly am.”
“He left a note by the road and he died right afterwards. He died and hundreds of cars drove by and didn’t even notice.”
“James. I know you’re upset but we don’t have time.”
James ignore her plea.
“I was asking myself why I had to cross paths with him. If all our friendship led to was this, then what was the point of even trying? It would have been better if we never met. I knew he had problems, even when I first met him. But I thought maybe, just maybe I could have saved him. I was wrong. Was our friendship all for nothing?”
“You did save him James, momentarily at least. If you hadn’t come along, Dale would have done what he did much earlier. There was nothing you could do to affect his overall plan. But you not only extended his time on earth, you did something for Dale that no one has ever done before. You listened and you cared. You were there when he really needed someone. That is the most selfless thing you have ever done James. To someone like Dale, that meant the world. You made his final moments in the world a little more meaningful. Do you really regret that?”
“No, I don’t.”
“Good. Because you shouldn’t. Look, I don’t mean to sound insensitive, but we can’t stay here James. If we stay, we die. Then you’ll prove yourself right. It will have all been for nothing.”
“That’s the thing Von. It can’t end like this. I can’t quit now.”
“You came back for me James. That’s what matters. Everything else is gone.”
“But that thing...”
“Yes exactly, that thing. It isn’t even human. You cannot possibly defeat it. I hate to repeat myself, but if you stay, you will die.”
“I’m sorry Von, but I can’t leave, not yet. I won’t run away from this any longer. This is my purpose. Not Dale. Not my mum. Not Hal. My purpose is to face this thing once and for all.
“Look around you, James! There is nothing left to face. Everything is dead. That thing will die with it. Just let it run its course.”
With no new words coming, James repeats himself. Partly, it is to convince himself of a task so foolish.
“I can’t run away from this thing, Von.”
“What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know. Just don’t worry about me. You go with Eryr. Fly towards that star and you’ll make it out of here.”
He knows what she’ll say. As does she. She says it anyway.
“You just got back James.”
“I know. You don’t understand right now, but to become the person you want me to be, I need to do this. When you wake up, everything will be different. Everything will be better. I promise you.”
“But what if you don’t make it?”
“I’ve made it this far, haven’t I?”
She decides there is no point trying to convince him out of it.
“Just be careful James.”
“I will. Now go.”
He hugs her, hoping he’ll see her again. Though he struggles to believe everything he just told her. He kisses her, then he sends her away. Again. He thinks of it as muscle memory.
CHAPTER 31: The Kiss
As fear swallows Navoeth, fear is overcome in the real world. As love threatens to die for James, love blossoms elsewhere. The popular conception is that love is struck by chance. Sometimes it is out of pure necessity. People fall in love because the alternative is to spend a lifetime in solitude. For some, loneliness spells certain death. Ultimately, a love’s origin is insignificant. It is what we do with love that defines its true value. Love used wisely can save a hopeless soul.
The soul of Richard Galinski mourns the loss of its one true match. There is an ethereal notion bestowed upon one’s soulmate. It is an eternal love that never dies with the vessel’s body. The after-shocks are felt for many years. Any
new relationship is always tainted. It is damaged, if only slightly. Find someone in the same state and perhaps the grieving soul still has a chance. This is where Luanne Shaw comes in. Her soul is also in grief. It mourns the loss of an inadequate match. It mourns the loss of passion. It curses love because it believes that love is temporary. As individuals, these two human beings are stranded. But together, they are connected. They are at peace with the pain of the past.
Richard Galinski imagines himself outside his body. It is a first kiss. A real kiss. He pictures the moment like the climax of a rom-com. The part where the man lets his guard now. The part when he spills his guts and says he will never be the perfect man. The woman tells the man to shut up and kiss her. The man obliges. Lips lock. Hands move over hips. Cue music. Roll credits. That’s the movies. Real life is so much better. Her lips are so cracked he has to run his tongue over them to keep the moment from drying up completely.
Then he feels it. All the pain and hurt that exists in his life; it stops existing for one infinitesimal second. She can feel it too. She tastes his breath, and her bitter divorce melts away. Richard’s fingers caress her neck, brushing aside the soul-sucking therapy sessions. She forgets about her patients. She forgets about all the problems they thrust upon her. They do not fear financial ruin. They do not fear the chance that such an encounter may spell career suicide. They do not fear commitment. They feel like teenagers. They spend the moment for all it’s worth.
They recoil from their intimate embrace and Dr Shaw straightens her glasses. She pats down her blazer. Richard clears his throat. He pretends to stifle a sneeze. It is a smile in disguise. They look at each other. They look away. They take in the room around them, before letting their attention be drawn to the bed in the centre of the room. Just days earlier, the fear they held for that body was the only thing they had in common. Now it seems they have very much in common. They take a few steps closer to the bed. Richard reaches for her hand. At first, she pulls away. Then she accepts it. Richard smiles again, this time showing it proudly. She smiles back. They do not know it yet, but love is already under their skin. Not because they wanted it. Not because they asked for it, but because they needed it. All it took was a moment as trying as this one. Only a monumental gesture would do.
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