“I don’t think using her to carry the vessel is appropriate. She is a young mortal and the stress on her body could kill her.”
“In mortal terms she is a full-grown woman who is capable of making her own decisions.”
“Was it really her decision?” I asked. “She’s stuck here and you tell her that she can save everyone by carrying the vessel of light. What was she supposed to say?”
“If she’d said no we would’ve honored her choice.”
“You would’ve?”
“Yes.” She picked up another stick, examining its length before commencing to sharpen it. “Variel tells me that you’ve had a vision about the new age.”
“Variel talks too much.”
“I honestly think she talks too little. She needs a bit more confidence.”
She was right. Variel was quiet and easily influenced. “I had a vision. Does it matter?”
“What was it?”
“I thought you’d be more interested in Father’s vision.”
“You know he never tells us exactly what he sees in his visions.”
“Not even you?”
She looked up, her eyes seeming to look deep into my soul.
I shuddered. “Have you ever looked into the seerstone?”
Her expression dropped as she looked down at the floor. “The stone is only for Eilim.”
“You do so much here I would’ve thought that you were able to look into it too. Haven’t you seen the mortal world?”
“What good would seeing it do me?” Her words made it seem like she didn’t care, but her downcast eyes told another story.
“Don’t you help Father make decisions about what to do in the mortal world?” I continued to press the issue out of curiosity more than anything.
“If he asks I do.”
We’d all seen the seerstone at some point, and though none of us could use it I’d assumed that it was different for Herthe. “Do you know what I wonder, Herthe?”
“What makes you think I care about what you wonder?” She went back to sharpening.
“I wonder why you don’t have visions of your own.”
“Who says I don’t?”
“You’ve never mentioned one.”
She stopped sharpening and looked up at me again. “Eilim is the one with the visions. You are an anomaly.”
“Why are you so interested in my visions then?”
“I’m not.” The muscles in her face tightened. “You can go.”
“Why doesn’t he let you use the stone? If you are indeed equals shouldn’t you use it too?”
She took the stone to the stick quickly. Short splinters flew up in the air before careening to the floor. Her fingers moved nimbly, rotating the stick with one hand as she sliced into it with the stone in the other hand. “Go.” She hurled the word at me like a rock.
I didn’t want to go though. She’d asked me to share a vision with her and I couldn’t resist such an invitation. “In my vision I saw a big silver fish. It had washed up on shore. The fish spoke to me and told me that everything would change and that a great danger was coming to us. Before I could talk to it any longer it hopped back into the water and swam away.”
Herthe stopped sharpening her stick and looked at the floor as if trying to make sense of my words. “And this fish was Twee?”
“I honestly don’t know, but it could be.”
Herthe sighed. “What does the vision mean?”
“I only have the visions. I tell others against the wishes of you and Father to gain an understanding of what they might mean. When you look at a vision through the eyes of another it can help interpret what is actually meant.”
“No matter what your visions are or what you might think, I ask that you make an effort to support us. You are not an elder. Your discontent undermines everything we’ve built here.”
“What is that?”
“A community of cooperation and love.”
I shook my head.
“I know you don’t agree. We all know. Just try to keep that to yourself while Twee carries the vessel.”
“That would be difficult for me.”
She smirked. “I know you like to tell everyone on the island what you’re thinking, but for the good of us all I ask that you restrain yourself.”
I didn’t like the idea of hiding any part of who I was or what I thought, but I was getting closer to Twee and knew it was best for her if I at least seemed to do what Herthe asked. Acting like I was following the rules didn’t mean I really had to follow them though.
Chapter 12
The first time I sneaked into Father’s hut my heart pounded with fear and sweat gathered on the palms of my hands. Everyone had gone to the sea for a special meal, but when Stellan asked me if I was going I said I was fasting and needed time alone to reflect. I’d hidden my eating from everyone that day in order to be more convincing. Once I was sure they were all gone I slipped inside Father’s hut.
Being in there alone was strange. Father didn’t have a special hut. He lived in the same type of small one-room structure we all did. There was one thing that was different about his hut though. The walls were covered in smoky dark drawings and sharp black lines that represented the mortal world. Every hundred years he would instruct the elders and a select few of them would help him paint a new vision on his walls. Whenever I was in here in the past, which was so few times that I could count them on my hands, I would study the pictures searching for their hidden meanings. Even though my time alone in his hut was limited I took a few moments to look at the smudged drawings: squares and lines that I believed were meant to represent something in the mortal world. I couldn’t make sense of it and didn’t have enough time to try. I’d come here for something else entirely.
I sat on the floor in front of the seerstone and looked into its flat gray surface. I had no idea how to make it work. Touching it with my sweaty hand, I left damp fingerprints on it that I was sure Father would see when he came back to his hut. It was warm though so I hoped it would dry before then. How did you work a seerstone? I did not know, but I was sure it had something to do with concentration, though my mind was all over the place. I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply trying to calm my racing thoughts so I could figure this out. No matter how hard I focused on relaxing I could not. My heart fluttered and my palms continued to sweat. Willing myself to focus, I sat staring at the stone’s cool gray surface and saw nothing but my slowly drying fingerprints. This was not going to be easy. I needed answers. I needed to do more research. I was reluctant to give up, but I knew there would be plenty of other opportunities to try. First I needed to find out how the stone worked.
As I left Father’s hut after my first attempt at looking into the mortal world the frustration rose up in me. How would I learn to use the seerstone without awakening suspicion?
It was already getting dark by the time I left Father’s hut. I grabbed a glowing stone from the meeting hut to help me see my way down the forest path. I walked to the shore to join the others. I hadn’t been walking long when I saw Twee coming up the path toward me. She still carried her same narrow frame, her belly not yet showing signs of the growth inside of her.
“Amara, I saw the light coming and wondered who it was.”
I looked down at my glowing stone and then up at her. Her face was weary. Her cheeks were slightly sunken and her eyes appeared hollow in the dim light. “Is the meal over?”
Twee shook her head. “I’m tired and not feeling great. Eilim wanted someone to come back with me, but I told him I was fine.”
“Are you?”
“Since you are here I wouldn’t mind if you accompanied me back the settlement.”
“Of course.” I grabbed hold of her thin arm and as soon as I did she leaned into me as if she might fall. I dropped the stone so I could use both of my hands to hold her upright.
“Sorry,” she said. “I’ve just been feeling so weak since the ceremony. Herthe said it will get better. My body is
just adjusting, but the adjustment is hard.”
“Why don’t you sit down for a moment and try to regain your strength?” I saw a fallen tree just a few feet from us and led her over to it.
She sat slowly on the rough log. “Thank you.” She wiped the sweat from her forehead. “Why have you been spying on me?”
I winced when she spoke. “I wasn’t spying.” Ever since Father said that Twee would carry the vessel I’d taken an interest in her. I wanted to know what they were telling her. I needed to know if all that was happening was fulfilling the vision I’d had of the fish. I wanted to know everything and wondered if she was being completely honest with me. Was there something she was hiding? Did she know more about the vessel than she was telling me?
“Come on, I’ve seen you.” She leaned forward placing her head in her hands.
“This is probably not the best time to talk about this.”
“When would be better? I’ve seen you hiding behind rocks and tree trunks listening when I talk to Herthe or Eilim. I’ve noticed the way you pretend not to be listening when I’m nearby but your ears seem to be honing in on my every word.”
“I think you have an exaggerated sense of your importance on this island.”
“Have I? Herthe and Eilim certainly seem to think I’m important. I don’t think I would’ve been elected to carry the vessel if I were not. Why are you spying on me when I’ve told you everything?”
“Have you? I’m confused because you don’t mind all of this now.”
Twee hung her head. “Oh, I mind. I feel like a caged animal. This island is so small that everyone knows who you are. Everyone has an opinion.” She put her hand on her stomach. “That doesn’t make me feel special. It makes me feel trapped.”
I understood. The island was consuming. “You’re not like us. You can leave.”
“Is it so easy now?” She motioned to her belly again. “You said so yourself.”
“Don’t listen to what I say. Most of the time I speak before thinking. You are from somewhere else. You don’t have the same restrictions we have. You can leave anytime.”
“Restrictions?”
“As immortals we are bound to this island. We cannot leave unless we are taken by a mortal. There is a barrier. We cannot go out beyond the great rocks offshore.”
“How do you know that?”
“I was told.”
“Have you ever tried?”
“Once. I made a raft and no matter how much I paddled I couldn’t get to the rocks. It was as if they were moving farther and farther out.”
“That’s impossible.”
I smiled. “You don’t believe me?”
She looked toward the trees, her eyes glazing over. She was quiet for a few minutes before the light returned to her eyes. “We should build a raft together. I’m a mortal so with me on board we could get beyond the rocks.”
She was right. With her on board, it should work, but the sea was vast and once we got beyond there would be nowhere for us to go. “If we made it beyond the rocks, then what would we do? There would be nothing around for miles.”
She shrugged as if that didn’t matter at all. “I don’t know, but it’s worth trying. I’m willing to try anything at this point, Amara.”
“Do you want to die?”
“Sometimes.”
“You hide it well.”
“My mother used to tell me I was a good actress.”
I sometimes forgot that Twee had a family. In my mind she was always a solitary entity, flitting from place to place who one day wound up on our shores.
“We should leave together,” Twee said. “It’s the only way.”
“What about the vessel?”
“I don’t know.” She stood slowly. “I think I can make it back to the settlement.”
“I’ll help you.” I retrieved the glowing stone from the ground, took her arm, and walked Twee to her hut.
We would leave the island together.
We started building right away, dragging logs down to the beach together and hiding them behind a large boulder near the water. Twee liked to talk about her childhood before the shipwreck. She spoke of her family with a mixture of joy and sorrow that made my heart ache. Mostly she told me about the mortal world. Though she hadn’t seen a lot of it because she was so young when she ended up on the island she’d seen more than I ever could’ve.
“I wonder if they survived,” she said with a wistful, faraway look in her eyes.
“Father never told you?”
She shook her head. “Once I asked and he said that they hadn’t, but the way his face froze at the question and how quickly he answered made me not believe him.”
“He knows. It’s his job to know.”
“I don’t care. I don’t believe him.”
“I can find out if your parents are still alive.”
“How can you?” she asked.
“I’ve been trying to learn to use the seerstone. I sneak into his hut when he is not there to practice.”
“Really?”
“Aren’t you afraid of getting caught?”
“No. Father has threatened to banish me, but I’m not afraid.”
Twee opened her mouth in shock at the idea of banishment. “What if he does?”
“I’m willing to risk it. When I figure out how to use the seerstone I’ll get someone to come here and get us. Without that our plan to leave won’t work.”
Twee nodded. “How are you doing with the seerstone? Any progress?”
“Not yet. I don’t know how it works, but once I get the hang of it, I’ll look for your family.”
“The stone lets you see the world beyond this island?” she asked.
“The stone lets you see everything. It is the main vehicle which Father uses to influence humanity.”
Twee thought about this idea for a moment. “So you could communicate with people using it.”
“That is the theory. I just have to figure out how to do it. I’m getting closer. I’m pretty sure it has to do with concentration and focus.”
“If my family is still alive, could you tell them that I’m still alive?”
“I’ll try, Twee. I’ll definitely try.”
I had to figure out how to use the seerstone. Everything depended on it.
Chapter 13
I watched Father and Herthe start down the path that led to the cliffs. I didn’t know where they were going or how long they’d be gone so I had to move quickly. I walked casually toward Father’s hut. Some souls were in the clearing chatting, but no one seemed to be paying attention to me. I stood by his door waiting for the right moment. When no one was looking I slipped inside.
This was my fourth time trying to use the seerstone and though I hadn’t had much luck I was getting more confident about my ability to figure it out. I’d gotten a few flashes the last time I tried. The images were blurred as if someone had smeared them with fat so I couldn’t see what they were. Making the stone work seemed to be all about focus. I’d been practicing concentrating even when I wasn’t in Father's hut. I’d sit in my own hut and focus on a single sound in the forest, blocking out all of the others. My mind was developing with patient practice and the more time I spent practicing my ability to focus, the closer I got to making the stone work as it should.
I sat on the floor with the stone in front of me like I usually did. Even though there was a risk of being caught with each visit I’d grown more and more confident. I knew that I couldn’t figure the stone out if I was afraid. I steeled my heart against fear and focused on what I could gain from discovering its secret. I closed my eyes and took a few deeps breaths. When I opened them the smeared lines of an image were beginning to come into view. I concentrated on escaping the island, how it might happen, and where I might go. I asked the stone to help me make a plan and that’s when the image of a man became clear to me. He sat on a wooden chair in a room with a rectangular table and a few other chairs. His skin was dark brown like Twee’s and his b
lack hair appeared to be braided back in rows against his head. A patch of hair grew from his chin. His shoulders were broad and even though he was sitting I could tell that he was a large, strong man.
A picture window was on the wall behind him through which I could see trees. The man sat drumming his fingers on the table looking down at his hands. I watched him tapping for a while before he looked up and I saw his face more clearly. It was a broad, weathered face with soft, drooping eyes. He leaned forward with his eyebrows raised and spoke, but I could not hear what he said. Then he stood up slowly. The creases between his eyebrows deepened. He began to walk toward me and my heart began to beat more rapidly as I realized that he could see me too. He reached out as if he expected to touch my face and I leaned back. The seerstone didn’t just allow me to see the mortal world, but it let mortals see me too. I would not be able to anonymously influence a mortal. I would have to communicate with him face to face. The idea thrilled and frightened me all at once because I had no way of knowing what to expect. I must have lost focus because the image of the man flickered out just as quickly as it had appeared. As soon as the image faded I left the hut. I would have time to think about what all of this meant later. Twee was expecting me on the beach and I was excited to tell her about my success.
I saw Aina on my way down to the beach to meet Twee. Her hair was like flames trailing behind her as she hurried toward me. “Amara, you are exactly who I was looking for.”
Aina was an elder and we rarely spoke to one another. I couldn’t imagine what she would want to say to me. “Well you found me.” I stopped on the path and waited for her to approach me.
She looked about nervously and grabbing my arm pulled me back into the trees. “Someone might see us and I need to speak with you alone.”
“All right then.” We stepped over roots rising up from the ground and downed branches as we ventured into the forest. We only stopped when the path was well out of sight.
Isle of Gods II: Amara Page 7