Dad entered the barn the same way that I had, carrying his full bucket. He set it down and then grabbed a couple of the burlap sacks from the pile in the loft. I headed for the burn pile with my wheelbarrow full of dirty hay, enjoying each and every breath of fresh air.
I kept in mind that my father expected the work to go as quickly as humanly possible and maybe even faster than that. I threw the hay by handfuls on the fire, making it flare up all over again. Then I made my way as quickly as I could without running back to the horrid barn where nightmares really had come true.
My father had left the barn with his newest body before I returned. I grabbed the shovel and scooped as much of the nastiness as I could up from the ground of the barn into the wheelbarrow. Hmm, where should I dump it? I decided that the place that made the most sense to dump and hide the mess would be the same place that my brother always brought the mulch that he cleaned from all of the animals- to the mulch pile.
I added my mixture of vomit, feces, and whatever else I had scooped up to the rotting vegetables, animal dung, and other household garbage that would eventually turn into soil. Then I used the shovel as I had seen both my father and my older brother do to stir the mixture so that no one would be able to tell the new from the old. The muscles in my arms burned from being used so much lately in ways that they had never really been used for that often. I hoped that Johnny would be home soon to finish helping me cover up for the messes that were made because of my father.
Back to the barn I headed once again with the wheelbarrow. Once inside I looked around for anything else big that could count as evidence against my father. I should have purposely left something to be found, but I didn’t dare in case it was my father who happened to find it.
I figured it was time to start scrubbing the beams that were stained with blood. I grabbed the sponge from the bucket, leaving it dripping with hot water and soap suds. While I scrubbed I thought to myself. I wondered if these bodies would be the last to be tortured and murdered in this barn. Also I wondered if this would be the last time I had to clean up after my father had killed someone. If not, how many more times would there be and for how long would I continue to do his dirty work?
Ugh, I was worn out, sore, exhausted and hungry. My father had never returned after he had left, most likely with the body of the cop. Would there be yet another area I had to scrub clean of blood? I really, really hoped not.
I also wondered whether Johnny had ever returned from getting rid of the cop’s vehicle. If he was smart he would never return. If he thought anything of Caroline and me though, he would come for us like he had told me he would as soon as he had things all set up and ready for us.
I got up, stretched, and looked around the barn carefully for any more possible evidence that I may have missed. I grabbed the broom and swept over the ground to help cover any spots where fluids had soaked in. Then I took some clean hay from one of the bales sitting against the wall and scattered a layer over the bare ground. I wished that my father would come back out to let me know whether or not the job I had done was good enough for his liking.
Deciding not to wait around, I left the barn to go back to the house, leaving the door open on purpose to let some of the smell air out. The sun was starting to set, meaning that it was most likely after eight o’clock at night.
My mother and Emily were seated at the table in the kitchen. I asked where Dad was. Apparently he had decided to go pick Johnny up from wherever it was that he had sent him to get rid of the cop’s car.
“Grab a bowl of stew and sit down with us Emily. In fact, dish me out a bowl too. This whole thing has had me so nervous I haven’t been able to eat. Now I think I can stomach some. It smells good anyhow. Caroline do you want some supper now too?”
“Yes Mommy. Emily…”
“Yes, I’ll dish yours too Caroline. You want some bread?” I looked at each of them, waiting for an answer. We always ate bread with our stew; I don’t know what made me ask this time. Of course, yes, they both let me know that they would like some bread.
I looked carefully at the meat as I dished each bowl. I could tell that it wasn’t beef or deer. It was some sort of white meat. Please God, let it be chicken. I was much too hungry to skip dinner so I made up my mind that chicken was what was in the stew. I knew that I was probably lying to myself, even as I was still making up the lie in my head.
After I had given my mother and sister their bowls, spoons, and buttered bread I sat down at the table with my own bowl of stew. I tried to make conversation to keep my mind from thinking about what I was quite possibly eating, knowing full well that I was breaking the rules of the table. “So what did you two do today?” I placed my first spoonful into my mouth.
Caroline answered first, “We cleaned the house.” Then she stuck her second spoonful into her mouth.
Mom added, “We got a lot done. We did all the dusting, sweeping, mopping, and even cleaned the walls in the living room.” Headlights shone through the darkness in the living room just then, shining in the mirror on the hutch that stood just outside the kitchen. “Oh good, it looks like your father and brother made it back home finally.”
Dad came walking into the kitchen first followed by a gloomy looking Johnny. “Mmm, smells great,” my father said as he took his seat at the table.
Mom got up from her chair and told Johnny to take a seat at the table while she dished his and my father’s suppers. He took his seat, like he was told to do, looking as if he were avoiding eye contact with everyone.
I wondered what all might have happened while he was gone today. Or maybe something bad had happened before he had ever left even. I never actually saw him face to face after I woke up until just now, so it was possible. Anything was possible in the Fleischer house.
I finished my bowl of stew and got busy washing the dishes. Dad asked me if I had finished cleaning up the barn and I told him that I had.
“Good. Everything should be fine then. Nothing happened here. That cop stopped by, asked if we had seen anything strange lately and we told him no, and then he went on his merry way. That’s the story if anyone at all asks. Are we all clear?”
Everyone agreed that they understood and agreed with what my father had said. They all finished eating and I finished up the dishes. Then Johnny, Caroline, and I each went to our rooms. Thank God another day was finally over and done with.
I was so very disappointed by the events of the day. There was still a good chance that their father would get caught for his crimes though and I really hoped that he did. A girl Emily’s age shouldn’t have to do the things that she had to do today. No girl of any age should ever have to do things of that sort.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
I wrote everything about the past couple of days down in my diary. Every little bit that I could remember so that I would have it on paper. If I didn’t live through growing up with my rotten father I imagined someone finding my diaries in the wall someday and sending them off to a publisher. I would be dead, which wasn’t really a big deal, but I would be a famous author, which was a very big deal to me.
I even added to my diary the part about hearing someone calling my name. Before I realized what I was writing I scribbled, “In my head I knew it was Julie calling my name but I refused to believe it at the time. She wanted to hide me inside my own mind but I just wasn’t ready yet.”
I looked back at what I had just written, shocked and more than a little freaked out by what I saw there. No! Could that be true? But it must be. I had written it myself and it did make sense to me, in a crazy sort of way.
I threw my diary and pen back into their hiding place behind the brick as if they were a poisonous snake ready to strike out at me. After I replaced the brick I looked at my doll. “Julie, was that really you who was calling to me last night?” My lifeless doll did not reply. Of course she didn’t reply. She was only a doll for God’s sake! Maybe I had made the whole thing up last night because I had been so tired and stressed out. What I
had written tonight could be easily explained by an overactive and overtired imagination.
I changed into my nightgown. My bed felt extra comfortable tonight, even though I had only woken up at four o’clock this afternoon. I cuddled Julie close to me and said, “I love you either way Julie. Good night.” Then I said my usual bedtime prayer. I switched my brain to the off position and drifted quickly off to sleep.
Ghosts floated through my dreams. They were looking accusingly at me and pointing their fingers. They were all there: the mom that I never learned the name of, the little girl named Michelle, my little brother Eric, Lucky, and Whisper.
There were others too, but I had never seen them before. There was a man and a woman, an older girl, and another man and woman. They each seemed strangely familiar to me, though I knew for certain that I had never met any of them before in my life. And in my dream I recalled the day that I caught my mother crying in her room and thought she was probably looking at old photographs. Somehow, though it seemed nuts, I just knew that I would see my ghostly visitors in those pictures my mom had been crying over.
When I woke up in the morning I remembered my dream right away. My curiosity was going at full speed all over again. I had to find out what my mother had been looking at that day. Maybe it would answer some of the questions I had about other family and why we kids knew nothing about them. The more that I thought about it, the more sure I became that I needed to see those pictures or whatever my mother had been looking at that day.
I got dressed and made my bed as usual, wondering what the point was of making my bed every single day. It wasn’t as if anyone at all besides me saw my bed when I wasn’t in it.
What was the point of anything that we did around here? We spent all day learning, cleaning, taking care of the animals and farm, and preparing and eating food. And all of it was for what reason, to live? What kind of a life was that? I knew what the reason was: to be around for my father’s sick fun. If he kept up the murdering he was doing there would be none of us left. The world would be better off without the Fleischer family in it anyhow.
Letting out a long sigh, I figured it was time to show my face upstairs and headed up to do just that. My mother and father were sitting at the kitchen table eating breakfast. Caroline was just coming into the kitchen too, looking like she had just woken up herself. There was already one dirty plate and cup on the counter so I figured that Johnny must have eaten and started his chores already. The smell of the food on the stove made my mouth water.
I wondered what the day held in store for me and the rest of my family. I grabbed myself and Caroline each a plate from the cupboard and a set of silverware from the drawer next to the sink. I set her plate and silverware down on the counter next to the stove and started to make my own plate. There were scrambled eggs, sausage, and toast already made and sitting in the pan. Caroline came up behind me, took her plate and started adding her food to it. I sat down to eat just before she did.
Dad was still had food in his mouth when he started talking to us, “I think we’re going to do something a little special today.” He seemed to really think hard about what he was going to say next and then finally added, “Yes, I think we are. I want you both to come outside when you’re through eating your breakfasts.”
“Okay,” I said after I had finished chewing the food that was in my mouth. I knew he wouldn’t let me get away with speaking with a mouth full of food. It kind of made me angry that he didn’t bother to follow his own rules. I wondered what this was all about, what this something a little special could possibly be that we would all be doing. I was still sore and swollen from the last thing my father decided to do with me. I didn’t look at Caroline because I was scared that I would make a face and that Dad would see it. I was hoping to get a chance to snoop in my parents’ bedroom soon, maybe even today if I could.
Dad finished his breakfast and went outside before the rest of us. Caroline and I both finished our breakfasts and then she offered to help me with the dishes. Mom headed outside. I wondered if I should dare try to sneak into their room now to find what I was looking for. I was scared, but how many chances did I really get to look in their room for something? The answer was: not very many at all.
I would try it. “Caroline, will you do me a huge favor?”
She was rinsing the plate that I had just washed. “Sure Emily. What is it?”
“Will you finish up the dishes for me and keep a look out for Mom or Dad to come back to the house? Like cough really loud if you see them heading this way. Do you think you can do that?”
She set the plate in the strainer to dry a little and then turned to face me. She looked nervous. “I don’t know Emily. What are you gonna do anyways? What if you get caught? We’ll both be dead meat.”
“We won’t get caught if you keep a good enough look out and cough like I told you. Please do this? I have to be quick. Come on Caroline,” I was almost begging her, “I’ll take the blame if we get caught somehow, I promise.”
She turned back around to wash another plate. “Okay, I guess. Hurry up and be careful though.” I kissed her on the cheek and ran off as lightly as I could in the direction of Mom and Dad’s room.
Now where would Mom keep that box? I was guessing probably either under the bed or in the closet. I looked under the bed first. There I found nothing but old magazines with naked women on the covers. I looked in the closet. It was packed full of hanging clothes and boxes of all shapes and sizes.
I looked for the box that I had seen on their bed that day. I found one that might be it, looked inside, and saw a pile of old photographs. That was lucky! I had found the box that I was looking for on the first try. I closed the lid and headed for the door with my treasure.
Caroline started coughing. Crap! I quickly left my parents’ room and ran for the cellar door. I heard the screen door begin to open and darted into the bathroom with the dusty box instead. My heart was pounding.
I heard my mother’s voice and relaxed just a little knowing that at least it wasn’t my father in the house. “Where did Emily take off to,” I heard her ask my little sister.
“I’m not sure Mommy. She ran off in a hurry. Maybe she had to use the bathroom.” She coughed again loudly.
“Are you alright,” my mother was still in the kitchen talking to Caroline. I turned on the water in the sink and locked the bathroom door. After a few moments there was a knock.
“Yes,” I replied to the knocker that I knew must be my mother.
“Are you okay,” she asked loudly to make sure I could hear her over the running water and through the door.
“Yes. My stomach was just upset and I had to go to the bathroom. I’ll be out in a couple of minutes.” How would I know when she went back outside?
“Okay, well your father is waiting on you girls so hurry it up before he gets mad.”
“I’ll try Mom,” and I turned off the faucet on the sink so I’d be able to hear the sounds outside of the bathroom better. A few moments later I heard her tell my sister to hurry up and get outside with or without me and then the screen door slammed shut.
I opened the bathroom door a crack and peeked out. No one was around except my sister. Good. I ran to the cellar door with my mother’s box and then shut it behind me again as I rushed down to my bedroom. I quickly shoved the box under the clothes in my nightstand and ran back upstairs.
Caroline had just finished putting the last of the clean dishes away. “Okay, thank you so much. I owe you one. Let’s go out to see what Dad wants now.”
I didn’t know what to think of the box of pictures that Emily now had hidden in her bedroom. She would be in so much trouble if she got caught with them and I was afraid for her. I was also a little curious to see what was inside the box and to see if the people Emily had seen in her dream would really be in the photos or not. Emily had some of their features so I was thinking that they could be relatives of hers.
I was also wondering what her father wanted her and her sis
ter outside for so badly. Whatever it was that he wanted them for, I was sure it was nothing good.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Dad, Mom, and Johnny were all out near the cooking pit just behind the house. What were they doing there? There was smoke rising from the pit and Dad was holding what looked like his poker in the coals. What in the world were we going to do? I couldn’t guess the answer to that for the life of me.
Caroline and I joined the rest of our family at the cooking pit. Mom seemed excited about what we were going to do. Did she know already? Dad acted excited too. He pulled his branding iron out from the hot coals.
“Alrighty Ruth, you’re first,” he was speaking to my mother, “Let’s see that butt!”
What the heck?! He was going to brand us?! I looked at Johnny who appeared to already have known what was going to take place out here and then at Caroline who looked as scared and horrified as I felt.
Detached: Book 1 of the Fleischer Series Page 12