Dancing in the Moonlight

by RaeAnne Thayne

  He couldn’t bear thinking about a life without her in it, but he didn’t see any other choice.

  “Ow! You stepped on my foot again, Uncle Jake! I’m gonna go dance with Uncle Seth. He’s a lot better dancer than you.”

  He laughed and shifted his attention back to his pouting niece. “Yeah, well, I’m sure he’s probably better at a lot of things. He spends enough time practicing.”

  Natalie looked remorseful, as if afraid she’d hurt his feelings. “You know, I’ll practice with you anytime you want. You only stepped on my toe a few times.”

  He laughed again and kissed her on the top of her head. “I won’t torture you anymore, sweetheart. Go find your uncle Seth. Look for the big huddle of giggling girls and you should find him.”

  Natalie kissed his cheek then flitted off. When he lifted his gaze, he found Maggie staring at him.

  Their eyes had met occasionally throughout the evening, but somehow this time seemed different. She seemed to stop whatever she was saying and just stare at him.

  He had heard people talk about time standing still, but until that moment he thought it was just hyperbole. Even from twenty feet away, something in her eyes made him forget everything else—the party, the music, the laughter.

  All he could focus on was her.

  Chapter Thirteen

  She smiled tentatively as he approached, then reached to tuck a lock of hair back behind her ear.

  Even after he reached her side, he couldn’t seem to stop looking at her, and he was aware of a deep-seated need to scoop her up and carry her off somewhere dark and private where he could kiss away that exhaustion in her eyes.

  “Do I have broccoli in my teeth or something?” she asked after a moment.

  “Sorry?”

  “Never mind.”

  If there were better light out here—and if she were any other woman—he might have thought that was a blush painted across her elegant cheekbones.

  “How about a dance, Lieutenant?”

  She grimaced. “I don’t think I’m quite ready for that.”

  “Make sure you let me know when you are and I’ll be the first one in line.”

  “You looked like you were doing fine with your niece.”

  “You must have missed the part where I crushed her delicate toes with my big, clumsy feet. She went looking for Seth. Apparently, he’s a much better dancer.”

  “Somehow that doesn’t surprise me.”

  He laughed. “Yeah. It’s not the first time a girl has deserted me for my baby brother, and it probably won’t be the last.”

  He settled beside her, enjoying the scent of her and the warmth from her shoulder occasionally brushing his.

  From here they had a view of the entire yard—the band, the dancers, the tables still bulging with food.

  The fairy lights flickered in the night, lending a soft magic to the ranch. Wade had brought in several chimineas to set around the conversation areas, and the outdoor fireplaces provided a crackling warmth as the April night air cooled.

  “Quite a party,” she said after a moment, as they watched Marjorie and Quinn fox-trot across the makeshift dance floor. As usual, his mother and her second husband looked as if they were having the time of their lives, lost in their own private joy.

  “It is.”

  “Everyone’s been so kind.”

  He smiled. “The best people on earth live in Pine Gulch, and they’re always ready for a celebration.”

  She shifted again, and he saw discomfort flicker in her dark eyes.

  “You’re hurting. Ready to call it a night?”

  She blew out a breath. “I should be tougher than this.”

  “If you were any tougher, you’d be tempered steel, Lieutenant.” He rose and held a hand out for her. “Come on, I’ll take you home.”

  “Won’t everyone be upset if I leave while the celebration is still in full swing?”

  “You’ve given enough tonight, Maggie. I think everyone here understands that.”

  She rose, obvious relief in her dark eyes, and he wanted to grab her right there in front of everyone and kiss her pain away.

  “I’d better find my mother and tell her goodbye,” she murmured after a moment.

  “Why don’t I meet you back here in five minutes?”

  “You don’t mind leaving early?”

  This time he couldn’t resist. He kissed her forehead. “I don’t mind. I’m yours to command, Magdalena. Haven’t you figured that out yet?”

  He walked away before she could respond and somehow found himself in the crowd of people—mostly female—around his younger brother.

  “Hey, Jake, tell old Myron Potter and his band to stick to something a little more lively, would you? No more of this moldy-oldy stuff. It’s a party—we want to move.”

  “You’ll have to tell them yourself. I’m leaving.”

  “Leaving?” He hadn’t noticed Wade approach, his littlest son, Cody, asleep in his arms. “Aren’t you supposed to be taking Maggie home?”

  To his dismay, he felt his face grow hot, for some inconceivable reason. “Yeah. She’s worn out, so we’re bugging out. As soon as she says goodbye to her mother, I’m taking her home so she can rest.”

  “Right.” Seth snickered. “So she can rest.”

  He sliced a glare at his brother. “I’d like to see you spend all day walking around on a narrow metal rod, then get through the evening making polite conversation in the middle of phantom pain that feels like knives ripping into skin and bone and muscle. You have no idea what it took Maggie to face everyone here. She’s been through enough tonight, so I’m taking her home. If you’ve got a problem with that, too damn bad.”

  His voice trailed off when he realized both of his brothers were gazing at him with odd expressions.

  “What?”

  Seth shook his head. “Man, you have got it bad.”

  Yeah, he’d had it bad for so long he couldn’t remember what it felt like not to have it, but he couldn’t quite figure out what he’d said to tip them off. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he muttered.

  “Maggie know how you feel about her?” Wade asked slowly, his eyes serious.

  Did she? He had told her a hundred different ways, but he’d never actually put his feelings into words. “She knows I’m concerned about her physical well-being, yes.”

  Wade and Seth looked at each other, then treated Jake to identical smirks. He had a strong urge to punch one or both of them. Seth was the logical choice as he was the youngest—and pounding him would provide the added benefit of messing up that pretty face.

  He actually caught himself flexing his fist and jerking back his forearm but then he decided he was a physician—and older besides—and it was up to him to be the mature one here.

  “Thanks for lending the ranch for the party, Wade,” he said instead. “It was a nice thing to do. Who knows? Maggie might actually stop thinking all Daltons should be shot on sight.”

  “I wouldn’t put away your bulletproof vest just yet.” Maggie spoke up behind him, a small smile playing around her mouth.

  He wondered why her soft flowery scent hadn’t tipped him off to her presence—and he wondered what his brothers would do if he grabbed her right there in front of them both, wrapped her in his arms and carried her away from here.

  “Actually, let me add my thanks,” she said to Wade. “It was a wonderful gesture and a great party.”

  After a moment she actually held out her hand. Wade slanted Jake a look, his eyebrows raised slightly, then he shifted Cody to his left arm so he could shake her hand.

  “We were honored to do it,” he murmured. “Welcome home, Lieutenant Cruz. We’re proud to call you one of our own.”

  She blinked a few times, and Jake saw she was fighting back tears. He knew she would hate shedding them here in front of his brothers so he stepped forward quickly.

  “Let’s get you home.”

  With a last wave to his brothers, he took her arm a
nd helped navigate her through the crowd.

  She didn’t seem to want to make conversation as they traveled the short drive to the Rancho de la Luna so he drove in silence as she leaned against the headrest and closed her eyes.

  Five minutes later he pulled up to the house, and she immediately opened her door and swung her legs out.

  “Just a minute, and I’ll help you.”

  “I can do it on my own.”

  “I know you can. But you don’t always have to.”

  To his gratification, she waited for him to come around the SUV. He reached to help her stand, but she stumbled a little and had to grab for him for support.

  He caught his breath as her hands gripped his shirt, then he forgot to breathe entirely when she wrapped her arms around his waist and tucked her head under his chin with a soft sigh.

  His heart beating hard, he froze in disbelief for just an instant, then he folded his arms around her and held on tight, bracing himself to support her weight.

  They stood that way for a long time as the April night eddied around them, cool and sweet. He could have stayed that way forever, but she pulled away far too soon.

  “I’d like to show you something. Will you come with me?”

  Baffled but curious, he nodded, wondering at this strange mood of hers. With their way lit only by the bright full moon, she led him down a narrow gravel path that cut between the house and the barn. They were heading toward the creek, he realized.

  She moved slowly on the uneven ground, and he took her arm. “Are you doing okay?”

  “I can make it this far. Come on, you’ll like this.”

  She tugged him closer to the sound of the rushing, runoff-swollen creek, to a small open-air bowery he’d noticed from a distance while he’d been working on the ranch.

  Up close, he discovered it was more than just a place for picnics, it looked like a comfortable outdoor retreat with bright Spanish tiles and gauzy mosquito netting curtains tied back at the supports.

  Inside was a table and several chairs as well as a padded chaise and even a porch swing and a clay fireplace in one corner.

  “What is this place?”

  Maggie dug through a drawer in one of the tables and pulled out some matches and candles. She set a trio of long white candles on an intricate wrought-iron holder on the table and lit them.

  “Mama loves to read and her favorite place to come was always here by the creek. One year she went to Mexico City to visit my grandparents and my father and I built this for her birthday to surprise her when she returned.”

  “It’s great! She must have been thrilled.”

  “She was. She still comes down here to read, even in wintertime.” She drew her sweater tighter around her and he noticed the air had chilled considerably since they left the Cold Creek.

  “Why don’t I light a fire?”

  “That would be good. There should be starters and kindling in the firebox there.”

  She settled on the chaise and watched him while he found the supplies and worked to coax a flame. In a short time the fire was burning merrily, warming the small space quickly.

  He took a chair next to her, and they sat in a companionable silence lit only by the moonlight slanting in from outside, the trio of candles and the fire’s glow. He felt as if he’d been contracting every muscle all day and finally they could begin to relax.

  Though he had tried to subvert it during the party, he had been desperate for peace, he realized, as he felt the stress and anguish of his failures—of losing a friend and a patient—recede a little further.

  He closed his eyes, letting the night and the place and Maggie’s presence soothe his soul.

  “I used to come down here a lot after my father died,” she said after a moment. “You can see the Cold Creek across the river. See?”

  He opened his eyes and followed the direction of her gaze. Through the trees, he could see lights flickering from the party. Over the fast, pounding creek, he thought he could hear the musicians as well, playing some kind of a waltz.

  “My mother and Guillermo are in love. I caught them locking lips on the front porch tonight.”

  Of all the things she might have chosen to discuss with him, that particular conversational bent would never have entered his mind. “That must have been awkward for all three of you.”

  “You could say that.” She gave him a considering look. “You don’t seem very surprised.”

  “Should I be?” he asked, distracted by the flickering play of light on her lovely features.

  “I don’t know. It shocked the heck out of me. I guess I was the last to know.”

  Jake smiled at her disgruntled tone. “I have a home-field advantage here. You’ve been away since high school while I’ve been right here with both of them for the past three years since finishing my residency.”

  “Do you think something’s been going on all that time?”

  “I couldn’t say for sure. But I can tell you that I didn’t start to sense any kind of vibe between them until the last year or so. I thought I might be mistaken—and it was none of my business, anyway—but when you told me they were fighting, I started to wonder about it. What does Viviana have to say about it?”

  “She didn’t want me to find out. I think she was afraid of my reaction, that maybe I wouldn’t understand or accept that she could have feelings for anyone but my father.”

  “Can you?” he asked. “How do you feel about the idea of the two of them together?”

  “Branching out into psychiatry now, Dr. Dalton?”

  He smiled. “Whatever works.”

  With exaggerated movements, she slouched down on the chaise and folded her arms across her chest as if she were on a therapist’s couch. “I’m fine with it. I am. I want her to be happy. Both of them, really. Tío Guillermo is a good man and I have no doubt he’ll treat her well.”

  “When my mother ran off with Quinn, I struggled a little at the idea of her with someone new, even though I was certainly happy for her. It might take you a while to adjust.”

  “I don’t think it will. I’m thrilled for them. My mother’s still a lovely woman and only in her mid-fifties. I sometimes forget that.”

  She was quiet. “My father’s been gone for thirteen years,” she finally said, her voice low. “Perhaps it’s time for all of us to let him go.”

  Her words seemed to hang in the air like dandelion puffs on a calm day, and he wondered if she was trying to tell him something significant. Was she ready to let the past go? His heart stirred but he almost didn’t dare let himself hope.

  “My father would want Mama to be happy. I know that.”

  He reached for her hand. Her fingers were cold, and he tightened his around her, wishing he could warm all the cold places inside her.

  “What about you? Abel adored you.”

  He laughed a little as a forgotten memory fought its way to the surface. “He used to come to the bus stop after school sometimes just to greet you. I can still see the way you would fly into his arms and he would twirl you around while you shrieked and laughed.”

  He hadn’t meant it to happen but his words sparked tears in her eyes that hovered on her thick, spiky eyelashes before spilling over. “I never doubted he loved me. Never.”

  He squeezed her fingers. “You said your father would want Viv to be happy. Don’t you think he would want you to be happy, too?”

  “He would have hated to see me like this.” She swiped at her cheeks, at more tears sliding down. “I think it would have been harder on him than it’s been on Mama.”

  “Oh, Maggie.” He chose his words carefully, sensing this was important to her. “Like your mother, I’m sure Abel would have hated that you had to go through pain. But I know without a doubt that no father would have been more proud of his daughter than Abel would have been of you, Lieutenant Cruz. You served with honor and courage. No father could ask more than that.”

  She pulled her fingers away from his, shifting restlessly on the c
haise. “Don’t.”

  “Don’t what?’

  “I wasn’t brave, Jake. I’m not some kind of hero. I was scared every single moment I served in Afghanistan. Every second. We were in a damn safe zone and I was still terrified out of my wits to walk outside. Anytime we had to leave the base, I just about soaked my Kevlar vest with flop sweat.”

  “But you did it.”

  “I didn’t have a choice! When you’re a soldier, you go where they send you!” The words gushed out of her like a slick, oily geyser, making him wonder how long they’d festered inside her.

  “Everyone tonight went on and on about how heroic I was. ‘Brave Magdalena Cruz. Our hero. She’s got the medals to prove it and everything.’ I hate that damn Purple Heart. I wanted to shove it down their throats when they came to Walter Reed to present it to me. I would trade every medal in the Army for the chance to have my friends back. To be myself again. To be whole.”

  Her voice broke on the last word, and his heart broke right along with it. He couldn’t stand it and he scooped her up, then settled back on the chaise with her in his arms.

  “I hate that I feel this way,” she mumbled against his chest.

  Sensing she needed to talk more than listen to him spout more platitudes, he remained silent, just holding her close.

  “I’m alive. I know I am. I’m alive and I should be grateful. Two of my team weren’t so lucky. Every time I start to feel sorry for myself, I see their faces and I’m so ashamed.”

  His arms tightened around her. “Have you ever thought maybe you should cut yourself a little slack?”

  “Easy to say, Dr. Dalton. Not so easy in practice.”

  “You didn’t plant that bomb, Maggie. You were over there to help people, just doing what you signed up to do, when you were caught up in circumstances beyond your control. You’re certainly not to blame for surviving when your friends didn’t, for getting a second chance even if it’s not exactly the life you would have chosen for yourself.”

  He paused and pressed a soft kiss to her hair, wondering how his heart could bleed at the same time it continued to expand to love her more deeply than he ever thought possible.