And he wasn’t even sure how to go about fixing her interest. Unlike Lady Mary Featherby, she wasn’t the kind of person to accept an earl just to win a title. But he could hardly go up to her and say he was sorry and please marry him, could he?
Well, could he?
If he was young Miss Deborah, he’d organize some convoluted plan that may—or more likely may not—work. But a man, especially an earl, couldn’t simply say, “I was rude and arrogant. I promise to be good. Please marry me.” Or could he? He might flesh out the statement a little, but really that’s what he needed to do, wasn’t it? To admit he’d behaved in a totally ungentlemanly and ignoble fashion and to beg her forgiveness. To beg her to accept him anyway. To promise to care for her in the manner in which she deserved, with all his heart and mind and strength.
But how could he make her listen to him? What should he say?
Instead of telling her the wedding will be in the cathedral, ask her where she’d like it. She might want it here at Kingsdene in this beautiful little chapel.
Instead of telling her I’m getting the heirloom ruby ring altered to fit her, explain that the family expects the countess to wear it but offer to buy her other jewelry of her choice as well, if that’s what she’d prefer.
And most important of all, tell her you love her, you babbling lackwit. Because you do!
Feeling as if he were marching into battle, Zethan left his room and went downstairs, ready to slay dragons, if necessary, to claim his bride.
****
Sapphira was bending over the staircase banister looking down on a scene of confusion below.
A servant in unfamiliar livery clutched a monkey while Joel and Micah argued with Simeon at the tops of their voices. Amos leaned against a wall laughing uproariously. Half a dozen servants stood nearby watching.
“The Bertuns’ monkey again?”
With laughter dancing in her blue eyes Sapphira replied, “Mrs. Bertun no longer wishes it to be at their home. Mr. Bertun offered it to Peter, who gave it to Joel and Micah, who think it will make them all the crack at school.”
“All the crack? The crack of their house master’s cane on their behinds mayhap.”
“Well yes. The thing is, it’s always lived with people in a house. It cannot be left outdoors as it will surely die. It wouldn’t know how to get food or anything like that.”
“I wonder if it could be trained to behave properly. After all, one trains dogs and horses.”
Sapphira looked doubtful. “I’m not sure Joel and Micah could do that. It would take a lot of work.”
“Consistency. The same behaviors should always be rewarded. I expect a person who trains dogs or horses could do it, though possibly not your brothers. Still, it may be— Deborah! It’s just the type of challenge your little sister needs. I imagine she could do it.”
“I do believe you’re right. Although what her headmistress will say when she arrives back at school with a monkey…”
Together they hurried down the stairs and Sapphira told Simeon of their conversation.
Zethan noticed a thoughtful look in Simeon’s eyes as he heard her out. “So Micah? Joel? What do you think?”
Micah’s shoulders drooped. “Peter gave it to us. But I do understand what you’re saying, sir. It would have been wonderful to arrive at school with a monkey though.”
“Somewhat less wonderful the first time it got into trouble though, I expect,” said Zethan.
“Yes sir,” replied Micah, still looking a little pouty around the mouth.
“When it is trained, properly trained, and trustworthy, I expect Deborah could bring it home for a visit and you could invite your particular friends here for a few days,” suggested Sapphira.
“Oh yes. That would be splendid,” said Joel.
“And it will still belong to the family. Whereas I expect the house master would take it from you and dispose of it within hours of your arrival at Eton,” added Simeon.
As Simeon and Amos began to make more arrangements, Zethan took Sapphira’s arm and led her away from the noise and people into the empty breakfast room.
“Do you really think Deborah can train that monkey to behave like a lapdog?”
“I think Miss Deborah could do just about anything she set her mind to. She is unusually clever—not just clever in a childish way, but smarter than many adults. She’s also a very determined young lady, and I think she cares for animals. If she talks to people who train horses in dressage, I don’t see why not. Monkeys are quite intelligent animals, you know.”
She nodded. “And Deborah does need something to occupy her mind, other than learning Greek.”
Now was the time for him to apologize to her. But what should he say? He’d been on the Town for more years than he cared to count, and usually had the socially correct words on the tip of his tongue. But gazing into Sapphira’s beautiful blue eyes, all those well-practiced pleasantries dried up in his throat. I want her so much. I love her. I do. I can’t bear to live without her.
Sapphira was waiting for him to speak. Do it right this time! he instructed himself.
He dropped to his knees at her feet, took her hands in his, and was distracted by how small and soft they felt. It made his cock leap and press hard against his breeches. But it also made him want to protect her and shelter her from any hurt.
“Please give me a second chance, Miss Sapphira. I love you and want to marry you. I pledge to make you happy. I did everything wrong last time. I behaved like a lout. I assure you I’ll do better. I truly love you and will do my utmost to make you happy, I promise.” He longed to pull her into his arms and kiss her senseless, then throw her over his shoulder, go upstairs, and fuck her until she could think of nothing but him. To pleasure her until she screamed with joy and cried out his name for the entire world to hear.
Unfortunately if he did anything so bold, Simeon really would shoot him or run him through. Or Amos would. Or even the twins. So…he waited for her answer, hoping against hope she’d say yes.
Sapphira was standing very still. She was so immobile she hardly seemed to be breathing, whereas his heart was pounding so hard he wondered if she could hear it. Or if it would crack his ribs. Sweat was breaking out on his brow, almost as if his body was trying to will her to agree.
Superstitiously he crossed his toes inside his boots, mentally chanting, Say yes. Say yes. Please, please, darling Sapphira, let me love you as you deserve.
Finally she gave a little sigh, tugged her hands free from his, and shook her head. Zethan’s heart plummeted right down to his shiny Hessians where his crossed toes wilted under her look. He actually felt his heart drop out of his chest and fall. He was almost surprised it wasn’t on the Axminster carpet between them, smashed into tiny pieces.
She clasped her hands in front of her and said, “I don’t wish to be cruel, my lord, but I cannot accept your offer. How do I know you won’t be cold to me as soon as the marriage settlements are signed? I want a husband I can respect. A man at whose side I’d be proud to stand.” Her eyes were bright, mayhap with tears, but her voice was firm.
From the depths of his sudden despair he begged, “Please say I may still call on you. Please give me the opportunity to demonstrate to you that I’m a changed man. A man who wishes only to serve you and make you happy for ever more.”
“Very well,” she agreed, then hurried from the room.
Zethan stood gazing after her, his world in ruins about him, but at least still with a shred of hope. Dammit, I’ll woo her and win her yet. At least she hasn’t completely rejected me. And her eyes—surely it wasn’t just her sweet nature that caused tears to glisten in them. Mayhap she does care for me, at least a little.
****
Sapphira hurried up the stairs and into her room where she paced the floor, her skirts swishing as she turned back and forth. The room was too small, too confining for her to pace and think. Yet if she went out into the garden she’d meet up with other people, and she needed to be alon
e, to think everything through herself and make her own decision.
So she climbed the stairs to the upper floor and walked into the old nursery. This was a big, sunny room where all the Arnott children had learned their letters and played under the watchful eye of a succession of nannies and tutors. She stood by the window looking out into the garden. It was beautiful here, a very pretty outlook. But of course now Simeon was married it was no longer her home.
She didn’t think she was a vain young woman, but with good birth, a reasonable portion, and an attractive face, she’d always assumed she’d marry and find happiness. Most of the young men who’d asked for her hand had been worthy suitors. They would be good husbands who’d look after her. Some of them probably even loved her. But she wanted so much more. She wanted a man who would respect her and who she could respect in turn. A man who would see her as an integral part of his life, not just as something society decreed he should acquire, or a brood-mare to provide heirs for his lands.
No man made her belly clench and her heart pound the way the earl did. Her inner core dampened whenever he walked into a room. Just dancing the waltz with him was enough to have her pulses pounding. And when he looked at her in his special way, every bit of her heated with passion and desire to be his.
Barnabas and Georgina, Theodora and John, Simeon and Anne, all of these were love matches. Sapphira knew Georgina, Theodora, and Anne very much enjoyed the pleasures of the bed, and she was sure she’d enjoy them too. But only if the earl genuinely cared about her. And how could she discover that? What if she said no and ended up with Sir Second Choice who was not able to make her pulses pound the way the earl did? And, on the other hand, what if she accepted the earl and he soon began ignoring her? Either way was a recipe for unhappiness. How could she make a good decision? Was there some kind of test she could set them both?
A test.
Sapphira sat on the window seat and began thinking in earnest.
****
The Season was fast drawing to a close and many members of the ton were leaving for Brighton. Zethan really didn’t care for Prinny or his pavilion, but if Brighton was where Sapphira would be, that’s where he’d go too.
He reserved a house he’d hired before, right on Marine Parade. The Steine was closer to the shops and libraries, but noisier, so on the whole Marine Parade, with its unencumbered view of the beach, suited him better.
He’d developed the habit of sending a page around to the Arnott Townhouse each morning to enquire what color gown Sapphira would be wearing that evening. Then in the afternoon he had the florist’s boy send her a small corsage of flowers designed to match her gown. She wore his flowers every second or third night, and he hoped she at least looked at them the rest of the time. He’d discovered he enjoyed matching the descriptions he received with the gowns he remembered her wearing.
On one occasion the Dowager had actually sent a ribbon back with the page as the color was a kind of shimmering blue-green he’d never seen Sapphira wear before and one that certainly defied any description he could have written of it. It reminded him of sea-foam, or perhaps a mermaid’s scales from a children’s picture.
Then, as he was walking home from a card game the next afternoon, he was passing Rundell and Bridge’s and there in the window was a pair of jeweled combs ornamented with stones that exact color. He’d hastened inside to buy them for her, and lingered to look at their sapphire collection. His Sapphira’s coloring was crying out for her to wear her name-stone. Her name may mean “beautiful” in Greek, and she is most assuredly beautiful, but to me she’ll always be named for her eye color.
Standing in the store, he realized his every thought was focused on her. His daily routine was fashioned around where she was going and what she would be doing. His whole being was just one heart-felt desire to be with her, to possess her, to cherish and protect her for all eternity.
I shall get the marriage settlements drafted. She’ll have an income under her own discretion that will be large enough for her to make free choices about her life. And at the very first opportunity, I’ll kiss her senseless. I can’t wait much longer.
Just the thought of kissing her had his cock painfully full and pressing against his breeches such that he had to keep his back turned to the people in the store for long minutes before he had his body under control again. But his heart was happy and felt lighter at the decision he’d made to take the next step in winning her love.
****
The Smithers’ card party was not the sort of event Sapphira would have attended by choice, but the Season was almost over and there was no other party on tonight. Besides, she wanted to see the earl. She looked forward to spending time with him almost every evening. Sapphira knew he’d been going to a lot of trouble to present her with appropriate flowers, but she couldn’t bring herself to wear them every night. Tonight however, she wore the tiny purple orchids in her hair he’d sent.
She had never managed to think of a test for him, but it seemed he had set himself just such a challenge with the provision of flowers for her, and so far he’d done very well at it.
They had spoken of going to Brighton and she wanted to ask him when he’d be leaving town. Judging by the small crowd here this evening, most people had already departed. Town had been getting thinner of company by the day and Simeon and Anne wanted to return to Kingsdene. Amos would escort her and Grandmama to Brighton, and when school finished, Simeon would bring the children there for a week or two.
Sapphira liked Brighton. She loved the salty smell of the sea and walking along the esplanade. The pavilion was always quite dreadfully hot, but there were many things to see and do, although sea bathing was one thing she did not plan to try.
But mostly she wanted to be with the earl. She felt quite miserable on the rare days when they didn’t meet. And she had to admit he’d been tremendously patient with her. His title, wealth, and handsome form made him the best catch of the season, and there were scores of young ladies willing and eager to marry him. Lady Mary Featherby was still very much the foremost of such ladies, but although the earl still danced with Lady Mary and many others, it was no secret Sapphira was the lady he wanted.
So am I behaving stupidly? Shouldn’t I welcome his addresses?
And if he marries me and then discards me?
Do you really believe that’s likely? Truly?
Yes. No. I don’t know!
Sapphira looked up from her thoughts and there was the earl walking toward her, his gaze fixed on her face. She was unable to prevent the smile that broke out and his smile in return was so wonderfully warm and welcoming her heart started to beat faster and her secret place clenched with need.
She fanned herself, hoping her face was not blushing as rosily as she feared it might be.
He bowed over her hand, brushing his lips against her gloved fingers in a manner guaranteed to make her even hotter.
“It’s hot in here. Would you like to walk on the balcony for a few minutes?” he asked. Raising his eyebrow at the Dowager, he added, “With your permission, of course.”
The Dowager nodded, her fan moving briskly. “For five minutes only,” she cautioned them.
The earl held out his arm to Sapphira and she stood, placing her fingers on it and letting him lead her the length of the room to the balcony doors. Outside, he enclosed her hand in his, pressing it into his arm, letting her feel his steely strength and the heat of him. Her belly clenched even harder and a little of her internal honey dampened her inner thighs.
They were quite alone on the balcony and swiftly the earl turned her to face him. “Let me kiss you, please, my dear Miss Sapphira. I want to marry you and make you mine. Let me show you how enjoyable it will be to be kissed by a man who worships you.”
She nodded. She’d been kissed before, but only by amorous boys. Never by a man who loved her. Besides, his lips were very inviting and she wanted to kiss him too.
He dropped his head, pulled her into his arms, and pressed h
is lips to hers. His lips were hot and soft, yet the pressure he exerted on her mouth was firm. He turned her head slightly and kissed her more deeply, pulling her body against his, but not so close he’d crush her gown. Still, she could feel the heat from him and his hands on her shoulders turned her into his touch.
He licked along her lips and she parted them a tiny fraction. His tongue prodded the seam of her mouth and she opened her lips willingly. His tongue slid inside and she sighed, pressing herself against him, heedless of her gown now as she wanted more of him. More of his mouth, more of his touch, more of everything about him.
His tongue thrust deep in her mouth, then slid along the inside of her cheeks and ran over the roof of her mouth. It felt amazing. Strange, but pleasant, teasing and provoking her, demanding a response from her.
She leaned her entire body against Zethan’s and let her tongue play with his, touching it in return, encouraging him. Her breasts were heavy and aching. Her nipples harder than stone. Her inner core damp with need. Against her body his manhood was huge and hard pressing into her belly. She wanted to feel him inside her, to have his hands on her breasts, to be naked in his bed!
Shocked at her own reaction, she pulled her mouth from his and stepped back out of his arms.
Instantly he let her go, his heavy-lidded eyes on her face. “Are you sorry I kissed you? I’ll apologize if you wish, but it seems to me you enjoyed it as much as I did.”
She shook her head. No she wasn’t sorry even if it had been a rash thing to do.
His gaze still searching her face he asked, “Does this mean you’re looking at my suit more favorably? May I soon call on your brother once again?”
She nodded, then said huskily, “Yes, I want to marry you.”
Smiles broke across his face and he lifted her hand to his mouth. “I promise I’ll make you happy. I can’t say often enough how rudely I behaved that first time. My wits had left me. I do love you, Sapphira.”
Promising Virgin Page 5