A Chance On Love (A World Apart Book 1)

by Laura B. Martinez

  “I think I should…”

  “Don’t. Don’t go, please.”

  “How long?” I ask not moving to sit back down.

  “What?” He asks not meeting my eyes.

  “How long have you felt this way?”

  “I don’t…”

  “Do not lie to me Sean O’Shea,” I snap my hands fisting on my hips.

  “A while, but I would never act on it.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Because you were with me brother for Christ sakes. He is an eejit for feckin’ about with that lass, he’s lucky I didn’t end him meself for the hurt he caused you.”

  “I don’t know what to say. I love you…” His eyes light up as the L word slips out. “As a brother, Sean, I’m sorry. I really do like this lad I’ve met.” His eyes dull and he looks at the floor.

  “Are ya?”

  “No, we’re not together, we only just met and he lives in L.A.,” I admit, sighing I sit on the edge of the sofa, not too close.

  “So, maybe there is a chance?” He asks, and I get a sick feeling in me stomach. I’m gonna have to break his heart, I don’t want to but what else am I supposed to do?

  “Sean, you are like a brother to me.”

  “Feelings change, believe me I know.”

  “I doubt my feeling towards you would grow into what you feel for me, I’m sorry. I’m gonna go,” I whisper. Standing I grab my bag and pause beside him. I thought this meeting was gonna go so differently. “I’m sorry,” I whisper again and kiss his cheek before leaving. Closing his office door, I take a deep cleansing breath, I feel like shite. He is one of the smartest, kindest and loyal blokes I know. But I can’t make myself feel something more.

  I leave quickly not wanting to run into any more O’Shea’s. I just need to get home, then I can think about the shite that just happened, I can’t believe it. I’m in shock. How did I not see? How could I not know how he felt? Pushing it all aside I get into my car, flinging my bag and shoes in the passenger seat, I just need to get out of here.

  As I pull away from the curb I see Sean run through the front door looking frantic. I keep going, I can’t deal with this right now. I need to get back home and into my bubble. My mind goes back to Leo, why do I feel guilty? Like I’ve done something wrong?

  I drive home in a daze my mind bouncing from Sean to Leo. Should I tell Leo what happened? Nothing did happen though, so why does it feel like a betrayal anyway?

  Parking my car I rush into my house not even bothering to take my shoes off. I don’t stop until I get to the kitchen, I busy myself making a cup of tea. I need advice. Brooke.

  I practically lunge across the table for my phone.

  Me: Are you around? I need you…

  Brooke: Hey, what’s up?

  Me: Can you answer a call?

  Brooke: Yeah?

  Instead of PMing back I hit call and wait impatiently.

  “Hey, what’s up?” She answers.

  “I need your advice,” I say my voice shaking.

  “What’s the matter? You sound all wrong. Did you have a run in with the douche?”

  “No, I. Er had to go to the office for one of their bullshite meetings.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Well, Sean met me there instead of his dad.”

  “Sean?” She asks confused.

  “Shane’s brother, he is nice and we were close before.”

  “And?”

  “Well, we were talking about my life and I let slip about Leo and he freaked out. He was worried and I understood that but…he er, he got this look in his eyes and he was standing over me.”

  “He didn’t hurt you, did he? If he did I will be on the next flight out there to beat his ass.” She threatens sounding pumped.

  I laugh at the image of Brooke trying to beat Sean.

  “No, he didn’t hurt me. He, he has feelings for me.”

  “Oh,” she whispers.

  “Yeah, I told him I love him like a brother and that I liked Leo. I made it clear that I didn’t feel that way about him.”

  “Good, but why do I hear a ‘but’ coming?”

  “I feel like I did something wrong. Like I led him on, or worse that I’ve betrayed Leo.” I blurt. I have no idea what to think, I’m so confused.

  “Right chill out. First, you made it clear as soon as he showed any interest in you. Second, you didn’t betray anyone, you and Leo aren’t together. So, you did nothing wrong.”

  “I know but I feel like I’ve betrayed him.” I sigh.

  “That’s because you like him.” She sings.

  “Do you think I should tell Leo what happened?” I ask.

  “Do you think you need to tell him?” She counters.

  “I don’t know, if we were together I would definitely tell him.”

  “Well, since you’re not and you didn’t do anything, I don’t think he needs to know.”

  I breathe a sigh of relief. “Thanks Brooke, I was freaking out there a little.”

  “I really couldn’t tell.” She says laughing. “So, this is new.”

  “Yeah, it’s nice to actually talk to you.”

  “I know, I was starting to think you were a guy after all,” she laughs.

  “Maybe I am but I sound like a lass.”

  “Yeah, your balls obviously haven’t dropped yet.”

  I laugh so hard tears run down my face. “Thanks for that.”

  “You’re welcome. Now tell me about the Italian Stallion. When are you talking to him next?” She asks sounding as excited as me.

  “That would be when he gets home sometime tomorrow.”

  “Oh, and what will you be talking about?” She asks.

  “Well, I promised to think about him while he was gone…”

  “Mmm, I know how that conversation is going to go.” She giggles, someone whispers in the background. “I’m sorry Kaitlyn, I gotta go the damn model is having a bitch fit over something or other.”

  “Okay, have fun. I’ll speak to you later.”

  “Bye.”

  Putting the phone down I reheat the water and make my cup of tea. I decide to push today out of mind I sit at the table and open my laptop; hoping to lose myself for a few hours.

  The next morning, I let myself sleep in. I’m so nervous about talking to Leo today, I decide to go for a run, a first for me but I needed the release. As I return home, my nerves have me almost falling flat on my face as I miss a step up to my house. Get a fuckin grip.

  After a shower, I dress and redress, trying to pick something nice but comfortable to wear.

  “What are you doing?” I ask myself, it’s not like I’m actually going to see him.

  Around twelve o’clock my nerves start to kick in and I start fussing over the cleanliness of my house, I fluff the pillows clean the kitchen and even vacuum Mr, Willy Shakespaw.

  After everything looks perfect I sit back down and check the clock, my stomach churns with every tick of the hand, every minute feels like an hour.

  I’m so feckin’ nervous you’d think Leo and I were meeting in real life not messaging each other. A vibration alerts me to the fact I have a message. My hands start to shake, as I reach for my phone. “Get a fuckin grip of ya self.” I mutter.

  Leo: Hey beautiful, how are you?

  Me: Hey! I’m good. How was your weekend? Anything fun happen?

  Leo: Same old, my aunties had fun telling everyone stories about Vin and I when we were kids.

  Me: I would have loved to hear those…

  Leo: Maybe some other time?

  Me: Er, yeah.

  Leo: Did you miss me?

  Me: Maybe a little.

  Leo: Just a little?

  Me: Okay, a lot. I was lost without your witty conversational skills.

  I roll my eyes at how much of an eejit I am, it sounded so much better in my head.

  Leo: You know sarcasm is an aphrodisiac.

  I laugh and do a quick Google search.

  Me: It is n
ot!

  Leo: It may not be for most, but I love your sarcasm.

  Me: Really???

  Leo: Yes, really. So, have you thought about me like I asked?

  Me: What do you mean?

  Leo: You know what.

  Me: …

  Leo: Have you?

  Me: Yes.

  Leo: Oh fuck. You have?

  Me: Uh-huh.

  Leo: Tell me what you were thinking?

  Me: No!

  Leo: Come on, I want to know.

  Me: Okay…

  I blow out a breath and mentally psych myself up. I’ve thought about this so much I know exactly what I’m gonna type before I do.

  Me: I’ve pictured you naked and tied to my bed.

  Leo: Fuck. Go on.

  Me: Blindfolded…Completely at my mercy.

  Leo: What would you do to me if I were?

  Me: I would taste your lips as I ran my nails down your chest… I would leave nail marks on you and you would love it.

  Leo: What else?

  Me: Then I’d follow the same path with my mouth and tongue, I’d lick and bite every inch of skin visible.

  I start to worry when I get no reply for a minute then I hear the blessed ping of my phone and relax.

  Leo: Holy Shit.

  Me: What were you doing?

  Leo: Nothing.

  Me: Are you touching yourself?

  Leo: Maybe.

  Me: Aren’t you at work?

  Leo: So?

  Me: Do you want me to stop?

  Leo: Fuck no, I’m enjoying this too much.

  Me: I’d tease the edge of your suit trousers with my tongue, slowly unzipping them as I kneel between your legs…

  Leo: You’ve given this some thought. Have you touched yourself while imagining sucking my cock?

  My body heats remembering the very pleasurable session I had with my B.O.B while doing as he asked.

  Me: Yes.

  Leo: Did you come?

  Me: Yes.

  Leo: Hard?

  Me: Yes.

  Leo: Did you say my name?

  I pause this time, my fingers ready to tell him the truth.

  Leo: Kaitlyn, did you say my name when you came?

  Me: Yes.

  Leo: Fuckkk.

  With just those few letters I imagine him coming in his hand with my name on his lips. I’m gonna need to shower again after this.

  Me: Are you still there?

  Leo: Barely. Shit that was amazing. Next time we need to do this over the phone, and Kaitlyn?

  Me: Yeah?

  Leo: Next time we both come together…

  Me: I need to go shower.

  Leo: Ah shit, I wish I was there.

  Me: Me too, bye.

  Leo: Speak to you later gorgeous.

  Dropping my phone I run upstairs and grab my B.O.B and into a very long shower we go.

  Chapter 10

  leo

  The past few weeks have been rough. Is there a word to describe what comes past exhaustion? I don’t think there is but if you find it, that’s the word that describes me right now.

  As soon as I arrived home from New York, I hit the ground running. Drowning in paperwork revisions and work stuff; I’ve had no time to myself.

  The last time I spoke with my dad he advised me to hire someone that could take care of the restaurant’s book keeping for me part time but I’m just too much of a control freak to let that happen, yet.

  The only thing keeping me sane is that moment, everyday where I get to speak to Kaitlyn.

  My conversations with Kaitlyn have been so good. Sometimes we just leave each other messages because she’s been busy with work and writing and with the time zones, sometimes I fall asleep as soon as my head hits something soft. Yeah, a few days ago, I fell asleep over Muffin, but hey, it’s not my fault that the pup is as soft as a pillow.

  I’ve slowly learned about her routine and random stuff about her work, but lately, I’ve been wanting to know more about her, about her life. I know it’s not easy for her to talk about her family. I can practically hear the pain in her typed words whenever I try to address the topic. I don’t blame her for being cautious about what she shares, I haven’t exactly been opened about my own past or even my present. This is why two nights ago, I decided to open up a little about something that has recently been bothering me. I smile as I remember the conversation that lead to this point, she was talking about Brooke. I’ve come to realize she’s one of her favorite topics to talk about, and I can understand why, I don’t even know the girl and I think she’s awesome.

  Kaitlyn: Then somehow, Brooke burned her water!

  Me: How do you burn water? Is that even possible?

  Kaitlyn: Aye, it is! Well, the water evaporates but the pot gets burned. I also have a confession to make.

  Me: Oh, do tell.

  Kaitlyn: I've also burnt water before and it was all your fault

  Me: Lmao, how is it my fault?

  Kaitlyn: I was daydreaming about you.

  Me: You’re cute.

  Kaitlyn: Stop it!

  Me: What? You are, I bet you get that a lot.

  Kaitlyn: No, nobody calls me cute, because I’m not.

  Me: I think you are. You’re one of those rare combinations where cute meets sexy as fuck.

  Kaitlyn: LOL! Believe me, there’s nothing sexy about me.

  Me: I beg to differ.

  Kaitlyn: I think you’re projecting. I bet women tell you how sexy you are all the time.

  Me: Yeah, but you know, comes with the territory.

  Kaitlyn: Arse!

  Me: Haha, well what can I say? I’m sexy and I know it.

  Kaitlyn: Can I ask you something?

  Me: You mean besides the question that you just asked?

  Kaitlyn: Pfft, yeah.

  Me: Shoot.

  Kaitlyn: I’ve seen your picture and you’re not...bad looking. I’ve heard your voice and I bet you could make a lot of money narrating romance novels. And you have a very successful business.

  Me: Okay, right now you’re just pointing all the obvious. The narration stuff is new though, points for being original. But, is there an actual question to all of this?

  Kaitlyn went silent for a few minutes and then began typing the million dollar question.

  Kaitlyn: Why are you single?

  I hit the call button, because this wasn’t something easy to talk about and as soon as she answered, I wished I could be with her.

  “Leo?” Kaitlyn’s voice is soft. “Did I say something wrong?”

  “No, but I felt like talking. Do you mind?”

  “I love hearing your voice, you know that.”

  “Good, because I love hearing yours too.”

  “Leo, why are you single?” she asks again.

  My mind was racing ten thousand miles per hour trying to figure how to say this.

  “Dating hasn’t been my thing in a long time.”

  “I can’t believe that. You don’t seem the type.”

  “What type would that be?” I ask intrigued by her statement.

  “The first time we talked, you came off as a ladies man.” She answers.

  “Is that so?”

  “Yup.”

  “I assure you I’m certainly not one. Like I said, dating is something I haven’t excelled at.”

  “Oh.” I could hear doubt in her voice so I try a funny approach.

  “I’m sorry to disappoint you. I’m not perfect. There, I said it, I know you thought of me as nothing less of perfection.”

  She giggles but then her tone becomes serious again. “I feel like there’s something you’re not telling me, but I understand if I’m being a pain in the arse.”

  Sighing I decide to change tactics and go with honesty.

  “I wasn’t always single, you know? I had a girlfriend a couple of years ago. A serious one.”

  “How serious?” Kaitlyn asks tentatively.

  “Very. We were engaged.”

 
“You were engaged?” Her voice turns even more softer.

  “Yeah.” I don’t tell her more, the lump in my throat has me pulling my phone away.

  “Leo?”

  “I’m still here.” I manage to answer.

  “Do you want to tell me what happened?”

  “We were together for almost three years. I loved her very much, she was my world. So, we decided to not to wait more than a year to make it official, but a little after that, a bit over two years ago, I was traveling a lot to L.A. to get my restaurant ready. Until everything changed. When my life changed.” I pause and breathe a couple of times before continuing. “The restaurant wasn’t finished yet, and I had to take care of some things that came up, I decided to move to L.A., it was the best option, and I asked her to come with me. She did, but a month later she started to complain about how she missed her life in New York, how she missed the old me. We started to fight, a lot, and one day she left.”

  Kaitlyn gasps. “She left? Just like that?”

  I couldn’t give her more details even though I wanted to.

  “Yeah, I spent the next six months trying to work things with her, until the day Peyton, that’s her name, did the only thing I couldn’t excuse.”

  “Oh no,” her voice breaks. “She cheated on you?”

  “No,” I chuckle because that’s what my family thought, and still thinks, happened. “She didn’t cheat on me.”

  “Then what was it? I don’t think there can be anything worse than cheating.”

  “She asked me to choose between her and my family.” I can hear her gasp but she doesn’t say anything.

  “I’ve never told anyone this,” I confess.

  “Not even your family?” Kaitlyn asks.

  “No, especially not my family. And there’s something I haven’t told you.” Kaitlyn’s voice trembles as she asks. “What is it?”

  “Peyton showed up at my Nonna’s birthday party. My sister and mom invited her. They still consider her as family, but this is because they don’t know what she said to me.”

  “Do you still love her?” I could hear her sobbing and something inside me ached at the thought of hurting her.

  “No, baby, I don’t.” I assure her. “Whatever we had broke and it’s not something that can be fixed.”

  “You don’t know that, maybe your family is right. Maybe you need to work out things with her, and they still love her.”