Tae Hyun rubbed his face in misery, the pain of his past distracting him from the violent wind as well. "Everything that happened after that was a blur," he continued, his misty eyes now set on the railing of the balcony. "I ran up the stairs and kicked her door open. Everything happened so fast, but the image I saw remains in my mind. I couldn't believe my eyes as the door swung open…there my brother was with his shirt off, his hands on Hae Jin, ready to rip her shirt open."
He took a moment to compose himself as his eyes glistened in rage. "I don't know how long I stood there frozen as I watched the scene before me. Kwon Ho Young was getting ready to rape Hae Jin. My brother was getting ready to rape our sister."
He exhaled sharply.
"I remember being so angry…so fucking angry that any conscience left within me vacated. I wanted to kill him. I was determined to kill him. I didn't care anymore. I just wanted to kill him. I didn't care about that bastard anymore."
Though the sternness of his voice acted as proof for the verity of his own statement, Yoori could tell from the tiny split in his voice that there was regret in what he said. She could tell that there was overwhelming guilt present within him that challenged his spoken words.
Tae Hyun went on, his eyes frantic as they relived the worst of his memories. "Next thing I knew, I pulled him off Hae Jin. She was crying and her face was bloody from all the punches he threw at her. Her entire body shook as her cries grew louder. My blood boiled as I slammed him against the wall. 'How could you do this?' I kept asking him as I slammed my fists into his stomach, his chest, and his face. ‘My sister!’ I kept screaming. ‘Our sister!’"
Tae Hyun’s glistening eyes soon dried up in revulsion. He went on, disgust and anger threading his voice.
"He laughed as I threw him onto the floor. ‘I’m the King of Serpents, you stupid little prick. I can do whatever the hell I want.’ He got up and charged at me. We fought for God knows how long. My energy was wearing thin as Hae Jin's cries were still prominent in the room. 'You should have stayed in the U.S. where you belong,' he whispered before removing a knife from his pocket. Taking countless jabs at me, he managed to cut my arm. It wasn't enough to kill me, but it was enough to cause me to lose focus. With a hard kick from him, I fell to the ground. I had been trained with the best of them, but I’ve never had a messier fight in my life. I’ve never been so unfocused, so stunned.”
He swallowed past his trauma. “When I fell, I must have hit the counter because then, as fate would have it, his gun fell into my hands. He didn't seem to notice. He charged at me once more with his knife in hand, ready to slice my throat open."
His voice grew soft, almost with pent up remorse. "That was when I knew I had to act. That was when I knew he would kill me without even blinking an eye – that was when I knew that we were no longer brothers. We were enemies and I knew what I had to do with my enemies. So I pointed the gun at him. I pointed it at his heart."
Leaning his head back, Tae Hyun closed his eyes. The sudden anguish that hit him seemed to surprise him.
"I don’t remember how many times I shot him. I couldn't stop as the image of him on top of Hae Jin replayed in my mind. All the rumors, all the horrible things he did kept replaying in my mind. I couldn't stop. I shot him until the anger left me, I shot him until the gun ran out of bullets, and I shot him until I couldn't shoot anymore."
He continued to stare at the railing of the balcony. Yoori couldn't tell what he was thinking. His breathing was so shallow that it broke her heart. He was in so much pain. She had never seen him look so vulnerable.
She wanted desperately to reach out to him and comfort him. But her arms remained frozen as they lay folded in front of her chest. She didn't know why she was hesitant, but she was. There was something about his silence. It wasn't the right time to talk to him. He was in the process of regaining his full composure. He was probably shaking with regret for telling her the story and making himself appear more vulnerable than he ever should. She couldn't bring herself to make it worse by extending her hand out to him – even though she wanted to.
After what felt like eternity, he finally lifted his eyes up to face her. He looked more composed, but only slightly. "That's why I told you that, if I could, I'd kill him again without any hesitation." He sighed, his voice becoming its steady self again. "I don't expect you to understand my hatred towards my older brother, why I showed no remorse for killing him. But you have to understand that – "
"I would’ve killed him too," Yoori interrupted thoughtlessly, her unblinking eyes on Tae Hyun.
The gust of wind stopped at this point.
He faced her. It was evident he was surprised by her violent statement.
"If it was me, I would have killed him as well," she repeated, gazing at him with understanding eyes. "I would have killed him a million times over."
She returned her attention to the distant city ahead of them. She was unsure of the verity of her own angry words. It perturbed her briefly, how much she meant what she said, but only briefly.
"You shouldn't have to feel any remorse," she went on, her eyes focusing on the distant blue sky. "He doesn't deserve any remorse.”
She hated Tae Hyun's older brother. She hated him for the simple fact that he ruined Hae Jin's life, and she hated him for the simple fact that he left Tae Hyun with the inescapable guilt of killing his own brother.
Tae Hyun's face became unreadable as he processed what she said. Returning his gaze to the view of the city as well, his only reply was silence.
Even though he didn't say anything, and even though they weren't looking at each other, Yoori could sense his relief. Relief that he was finally able to let this secret off his chest and relief that she finally understood why he had to kill his brother.
The wind became more unforgiving as they remained on the balcony. The sound of the howling wind was the only spoken voice falling between them. What do you say to one another after a conversation like that?
Finally taking notice of the icy chill attacking her bare shoulders, Yoori flinched from the cold. The pain of freezing only lasted for a couple of seconds when a black jacket was carefully draped over her shoulders. She gazed appreciatively up at Tae Hyun, who was staring at her quietly, his eyes gentle since he last gazed at her.
Then finally, the silence was broken.
"Choi Yoori," he began cautiously, returning his eyes to the view ahead of them. "What we talked about out here today...is to never be spoken about again."
Yoori nodded in understanding. She returned her gaze to the view ahead. She understood that everything he told her out here was spoken in confidence. Just like that, Yoori promised herself that although she'd always remember what occurred here, she would never bring up the topic again. She would never bring up the pain for Tae Hyun to relive again. Never again.
Nodding silently, he began to step away from the railing of the balcony.
"I'm sorry for everything," he said suddenly.
Astonished with the words emitting out of him, Yoori gaped at Tae Hyun. The guilt looming in his voice took her by surprise. Had Tae Hyun really just apologized for everything that happened since they first met? A small part of her felt that there was more to what he was apologizing for. Yet, the bigger part of her challenged that belief with the obvious. Of course he was apologizing for what had happened so far. What else could he be apologizing for?
After mentally scolding herself for not acknowledging the obvious, a tiny smile edged her lips. Though she was sure that Tae Hyun understood that her smile was her gesture of accepting his apology, she was surprised to see that his eyes were still imbued with guilt. If anything, he looked guiltier.
She didn’t have the opportunity to think more of it. Tae Hyun, seemingly sensing her alertness, wore a smile on his own face. In a split second, he obliterated any trace of pained guilt.
"It's cold out here." He made his way back to the warm apartment. Sliding the door open, he stepped in halfway, his left leg in the apartment
as his right leg stood on the foundation of the balcony.
"Choi Yoori.” He raised his hand up, creating an open invitation for her to take it. "We both haven't eaten all day. Let's go out. What are you in the mood for?"
Her right hand still holding onto his jacket to keep it from falling off her shoulders, Yoori smiled and took a step forward. She took his hand and allowed him to help her in.
"Italian," she answered happily.
She stepped into the apartment, releasing her hold on his hand. The warmness of the apartment embraced her. Standing before Tae Hyun with her back to him, a measure of peace came over her. She was glad that they were finally going to return to their previous form of interaction – the light-hearted one.
"Italian it is." Hunching forward, his warm breath lingered near her ear. "Now hurry and get dressed before I leave without you."
Yoori shivered with butterflies.
Luckily, there was humor present in his voice. One that thankfully calmed Yoori’s excited nerves. Though their relationship was complicated, she was sure that he didn't think of her as anything more than a good friend/assistant.
Regardless, Tae Hyun was undoubtedly a handsome guy and actions such as whispering into her ear always left her with tingling sensations that she had grown wary of having. It also didn't help that she caught another whiff of that intoxicating cologne of his. Needless to say, the humor in his voice definitely aided in helping her to function normally, reminding her that their complicated relationship was actually a simple one – they were just good company for each other. Nothing more, nothing less.
As she digested his words, Yoori laughed incredulously, knowing fairly well that he would never leave without her. It would definitely be a pitiful sight for Tae Hyun to dine at an Italian restaurant alone. Moreover, she was sure he was relieved that she was no longer giving him the cold shoulder. The last thing he would endeavor to do was piss her off so soon.
Rather than retorting with the usual smart-ass comment, Yoori merely nodded, the smile never leaving her face as she rushed into the bedroom.
Why the rush? Was she afraid Tae Hyun would leave her?
No, it wasn’t that.
She was excited to finally eat. And of course, as much as she hated to admit it, she was also excited to talk to Tae Hyun again – even if their conversations would consist of nothing but useless bickering. She was surprised to admit that she actually missed their bantering and was happier knowing that they'd be able to put everything behind them and get back to normal.
Whatever “normal” was for a crime lord and his personal assistant.
“You have to kill people like they are worth nothing.”
24: Shop ‘till You Drop
It had been more than several days since their Italian dinner and it didn't take long for things to quickly return to “normal” for Yoori and Tae Hyun. Yoori went back to being the bitter, “blackmailed-into-slavery” assistant and Tae Hyun went straight back to being the demanding, “cold-hearted” crime boss.
Bickering became the equivalent of breathing for them.
All “normalcy” aside though, something was off about their relationship – something that Yoori, for the life of her, couldn't quite figure out. Tae Hyun was acting more abnormal than usual, and to a certain degree, she was acting abnormal too.
A prime example of all these abnormalities occurred when they went to the supermarket to restock their food supply. Apparently, even with the simple task of shopping for food, Tae Hyun and Yoori never failed to leave a lasting impression on everything around them...
"Choi Yoori, are you seriously buying that much instant noodle?" Tae Hyun asked, watching as she reached for her second box of instant noodles.
"Shut up. I can't cook," she replied stiffly, emphasizing the last bit.
She glared at Tae Hyun. Could she help that they were out of edible food and the only thing she could “cook” were instant noodles? Although her unhealthy choice of food bothered Tae Hyun, she didn't really care too much. At the end of the day, it was her choice to eat unhealthily, not his.
She lugged another big box of instant noodles from the grocery aisle with her un-cuffed hand and struggled to throw it into the shopping cart.
"You’ve got to be kidding me," Tae Hyun commented when the box she threw into the shopping cart doubled over. Displaying impressive speed, Tae Hyun managed to catch the falling box with his free hand. He held it against his chest and chucked it back into the aisle from where Yoori first fished it.
"No! What are you doing?" she cried dramatically, struggling to retrieve the box. Her efforts were futile when he held her back.
"You act like instant noodles are the only food out there. Come on, let's get actual food," he said tiredly. His cuffed hand finding hers, their fingers became casually intertwined as he continued to push the cart down the aisle.
They agreed, due to Tae Hyun's continual insistence, that holding hands in public would be a good thing to do to mask the fact that she was handcuffed to him. Though it had never occurred to Yoori that Tae Hyun would be the type to be afraid of getting in trouble, she didn't think too much of it and agreed to such a gesture. It wasn't like holding hands with Kwon Tae Hyun was the most horrible thing to happen to her.
No. At the moment, the worst thing that could happen to her was being denied her unhealthy choice of food.
"You're so cheap," Yoori muttered, unknowingly tightening her grasp on his hand. She kept her bitter gaze on the ever-changing products on the aisle.
He gazed down at her, not believing her line of reasoning.
"What the hell are you talking about? I'm getting ready to spend more money so we can actually eat healthy food," he defended as they strolled into the vegetables and fruits section.
When Yoori didn't respond or return his gaze, Tae Hyun sighed as if she was a lost cause and immediately changed the subject. He seemed to do that a lot whenever a silent treatment became imminent on her part.
"So what's your favorite dish?" he asked nonchalantly, his hand reaching out to inspect a couple of tomatoes for their firmness.
Yoori rolled her eyes. Of course Tae Hyun would bring up food to get her to start talking to him again. Though catching on to his tactics, Yoori turned to face him anyway.
"Oh, like you're going to let me eat what you cooked this time?" She hadn't forgotten about that fateful morning where he enjoyed a decadent breakfast while she ate dry cereal.
He grabbed a plastic bag and placed four firm tomatoes in it.
"Yeah, of course," he replied, feigning innocence to the events of that morning.
Yoori scoffed at his answer.
He gazed at her questioningly. He was offended she didn’t believe his sincerity. "What?"
"Why are you being nice?" she finally asked.
Yes, all normalcies in their bickering aside, she had also noticed that Tae Hyun had grown a wee bit nicer to her. He wasn't being entirely nice, but just the small ounce was enough for her to take notice. Naturally, it was enough to freak her out.
She inspected the tomatoes in the bag. "Are these the equivalents of poisonous apples or something?"
She was half-joking and half-serious. Though she leaned a bit further to being serious.
He peeled the bag from her and placed it in the shopping cart. He was visibly offended. "What? You'd rather I be mean?"
"No, that's not what I'm saying. It's just weird." She held out her arm as evidence for her observation. "See? I'm getting goose bumps."
He was outraged. "I can be nice.”
"Oh yeah," she began sarcastically, holding up her cuffed wrist. "Yes, Mr. Crime Lord. You are definitely kind beyond words."
He eyed her cuffed wrist and chuckled like a kid caught with a lie. Walking over to the salad section, he used the opportunity to change the subject once more. "Anyway, you didn't answer me. What's your favorite dish?"
She hesitated to answer. What was the point? He wouldn't be able to make it anyway.
"Um, you probably can't make it."
"Try me."
Her hesitation remained.
"Stop being such a baby," he incited, knowing well that name-calling would get Yoori fired up.
Yoori grimaced at his comment. Closing her eyes as a means to calm herself before she flipped the bird at him, she took in a deep breath. She relaxed when she thought about her favorite dish. A big smile crept on her face. Her mouth watered. Oh, he really shouldn't have asked.
"I really like sushi," she said dreamily, her eyes twinkling with excitement as she spoke. "There was this really good sushi dish at this restaurant near where I lived. They had this special roll called the 'Tiger Roll.’" She paused and closed her eyes like she was savoring the taste in her hungry mouth. "Oh man, it was the most delicious thing ever." She sighed when she opened her eyes. She slumped her shoulders and pouted. "Too bad it closed down."
Tae Hyun suppressed a chuckle and shook his head at her.
"What?" Yoori asked, thrown as to why he laughed. She smacked his shoulder when he didn’t answer her right away. "What's so funny?"
Tae Hyun sighed, ending his abrupt laughing stint. "It makes sense that you would like something that I have no talent in making."
His attention transferred to the destination ahead. He began to push the cart to the frozen meat section.
Yoori followed him, perturbed with his behavior. Seriously, what had gotten into him?
"Gosh, you're being so...nice. Is everything okay?" Yoori found herself asking. She craned her neck, watching as Tae Hyun threw a couple of frozen chicken thighs into the shopping cart.
His hand firmly gripping on the rail of the shopping cart, Tae Hyun turned to Yoori with an exasperated look on his face. "Suddenly being civil is considered ‘nice’?”
"Maybe..."
"Shouldn't you be milking this for all it’s worth?"
"Yeah, I suppose I should be milking it. But I'm just being careful."
Welcome to the Underworld (A Welcome to the Underworld Novel, Book 1) Page 29