Professor Hot Pants
Ember-Raine Winters
Professor Hot Pants
Copyright © 2018 Ember-Raine Winters
Cover Design: Heather Bryant
Photo: depositphotos
Editor: Randie Creamer
Formatter: Ember-Raine Winters
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. This book contains material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by an information and retrieval system without express written permission from the Author/Publisher.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination, or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Table of Contents
PROLOGUE
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
CHAPTER NINETEEN
CHAPTER TWENTY
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
CHAPTER THIRTY
EPILOUGUE
Acknowledgements
I have the best family in the world! They put up with my crap and are super supportive. Especially, my mom and sister. They are the best!
My DAT girls, you know who you are. Thank you so much for always being there for me during this crazy journey. I will always love you! (Even when you send me questionable pictures of Justin Beiber.)
All of the amazing Indie Authors and bloggers I have met over the last year! I freaking FLOVE you! You have made the last year one of the best and I can’t wait for the next!
Last, but not least my editor, Randie Creamer. [email protected] I couldn’t do this without you! Thank you so much!
Dedication
To Randie, I never would have thought I could write a book like this until you pushed me. Thank you!
RYAN
I had perfected the art of sneaking out of people’s beds in the middle of the night. Men, women, it didn’t matter one way or another; it was all about scratching the itch. So when I was crawling out of some random guy’s bed one night after fucking him into oblivion, he surprised me by grabbing my arm with his hand.
“Where are you going, Ryan?”
Turning at the sound of his sleepy voice, clothes on the floor forgotten, the lie slipped out easily as I extracted my arm.
“I have an early class in the morning.” He sat up, scrubbed his hand over his face and looked at me quizzically as if asking permission before his hand came down on my dick and stroked it. My cock hardened under his touch.
“How about I suck you off before you go?” Sleepy confusion gone, desire now plain in his eyes. I hesitated and he must have taken that as my silent agreement because he licked his lips, then his mouth came down on my cock. His tongue swirled around the head before licking it from root to tip. I grabbed his shaggy hair guiding his mouth back to the head.
“Open your mouth, take it all.” He groaned at the demand as I thrust my hips up and hit the back of his throat with the tip of my cock. It was pretty much a wild ride after that. “Hold still. I’m gonna fuck that mouth.”
He did what he was told. I grinned, grabbing fistfuls of his hair and pumping into his mouth at a punishing pace. He moaned around my dick and the vibrations went straight to my balls. “Are you jerking yourself off as I take what I want?” He tried to nod but I held him in place. “Good.” No doubt I was a bastard, but I wasn’t so far gone that I’d ever deny my hookup the benefit of getting off as well.
It was only a matter of moments before I came on a roar down his throat. I had to give it to him, he drank every last drop. “Thanks for that.” Reaching for my jeans, he looked at me a little dumbfounded, with hurt evident in his eyes, but I never promised anyone more than I was willing to give. He knew the score.
I walked out of his dorm without a backward glance, with the feel of his eyes boring into my back, but I shrugged it off. My phone rang and I smiled. “Hey, Mom.”
“Ryan, how are you, baby boy,” she slurred the words.
“I’m good.” I paused on the sidewalk, waiting to hear what she wanted. She knew I wouldn’t support her habit, but at the same time, I wouldn’t leave her in a lurch either. I worked two jobs on top of the academic scholarship I received to go to school. I paid her cell phone bill and rent on her shitty little studio apartment and filled her fridge full of groceries but I never gave her money and she knew that. She had stopped asking me for money a long time ago. “What’s up?”
“What are you doing up so late?”
“I had an itch,” I said vaguely. I heard her sigh on the other end of the phone. “Don’t start, Mom.”
“When are you going to stop with the random hook-ups? I want better than that for you.” She grumbled. “I don’t want you to be like me. You’re so much better.”
“Maybe I’m not. Maybe I’m not cut out for a real relationship.” I would never let her, or anyone for that matter, know how badly my childhood fucked me up. It was the main reason I studied psychology. I’d taken enough classes to know my fucked-up childhood had everything to do with who I’d become, but there was no way I was analyzing anything. Day by day was all I could handle.
“You’re meant for so many great things, baby boy. I hope one day you realize that.”
“Mom? What’s this all about? Why are you talking like you’re saying goodbye?” With her lifestyle any day could be her last, and I tried desperately to get her into rehab, but that just made her angry so I’d stopped pushing. Moments like these regret was easy to find.
“You never know what could happen. I just wanted to remind you how much I love you and that I know you’re going to do great things one day.” She sniffled and hung up the phone before I could grill her for information. The phone went straight to voicemail on my attempt to call her back and figure out what that was all about. The feeling of dread grew the closer I got to my dorm, and I knew that sleep would not be happening.
PHILIP
It was Friday afternoon, and as much as I’d wanted to cancel class and go back to bed, there I was, writing on the outdated chalk board while waiting for the students to arrive and get settled in. Standing there had nothing to do with being a decent professor and everything to do with seeing if he showed up. I knew it was wrong, but I couldn’t help but be captivated by the boy with the haunted eyes. He hadn’t attended class in almost a week and I found myself wondering why. Since the beginning of the semester a few weeks ago, he’d never missed a class, and stupidly, it made me wonder what was going on with him.
“Pavlov’s Dog—” my voice rang out through the amphitheater-style classroom “—is the theory that positive reinforcement can condition an animal to come when called.
Pavlov rang a bell, and at first his dog ignored it, but after receiving treats each time he obeyed with the ringing of the bell, the dog eventually responded to when Pavlov rang the bell, with or without the treat. He associated the ringing of the bell with the treat, being conditioned to do so. I tried something similar with my old black lab Sadie, since she refused to come inside at night. I used to open the refrigerator and fumble around before grabbing the hot dogs that I’d buy especially for her. When I first began this, I had to go outside, throwing pieces and making a trail, leading her back into the house and to the fridge.” I chuckled softly at the retelling. “Eventually she caught on to the fact that when I opened the refrigerator late at night, she’d get a hot dog. Pavlov’s theory worked so well, it was the only way I could get her to come inside at night.”
The class all laughed. “Okay, everyone, I want you to pair up and discuss the possibility of positive reinforcement and how it could work on people. There is a two-page paper due next Monday on why you think Pavlov’s theory does or doesn’t work with people. The more creative the answers the better. Do not forget to include pertinent references and site them correctly, people.” The collective groan that filled the room had me chuckling. “Seriously, you guys? It’s two pages. You can write a two-page paper in your sleep.” I motioned to one of my students. “Sissy, can you come here for a minute?”
From what I’d been able to gather during the semester, Sissy was Ryan’s best friend. If anyone could tell me what was going on with him it would be her. Of course I disguised my concern as being more about his GPA and his ability to catch up on his course work.
“You wanted to see me, Professor Marks?”
“Yes, I know you and Ryan are close. I’m concerned about his grades slipping since he has missed every one of my classes this week. Is something going on?”
Her eyes went wide before she began to babble. “Shit, er... shoot. Ugh! I don’t know… Ry is gonna kill me.”
“Sissy, focus please.” I speared her with a look, hoping like hell my “professor face” would force her to spill. “What’s going on? He never misses class.”
She looked down as she mumbled, “His mom… she overdosed last weekend.”
“Oh.” I nodded, unsure of an appropriate response, which showed how not professional I felt about this particular student considering I was a psychologist and taught the damn subject. But, keeping a professional tone with my students was necessary and allowing any of them to see just how much that information made my chest tighten was probably crossing a line. “Well, um, thank you for telling me—”
“He hasn’t left his dorm room in days!” she interrupted, thankfully, since my mind was a whirlwind. “He called into both of his jobs, hasn’t shown up for any classes. I tried to get him to at least go to class, figuring it might help, but then he had a fight with his sister too, and he won’t budge, so I’m not sure what I should do.”
Coming back down from my initial shock, I asked, “Have you tried to get him to see the grief counselor?”
“Yeah, but Ryan is... strong willed and very closed-off about his mom and sister.” She scratched the back of her neck, her eyes looking around as if we’d be heard at any moment. “He’s a little self-destructive, but he’s more mature than anyone I know. Honestly, professor, I’m really worried, this could break him.”
Self-destructive was not a term I wanted to hear associated with anyone, especially Ryan. Why this girl didn’t speak up sooner, I’d never know. “Don’t worry, Sissy. Thank you for confiding in me. I’ll have a talk with him and see what I can do.” The relief in her eyes was not surprising. As mature as Ryan seemed to be, his best friend was clearly on the younger side of the adult spectrum.
“Thank you! This is such a relief. I mean I wanted to say something, but didn’t know if Ryan would be mad, but this is better. He’s my best friend, so yeah, if you could help, even if he gets pis—uh, mad at me, this is good.”
Placing my hand on her arm in the hopes of calming her down, I nodded and gave her a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure Ryan’s fine.”
Whether or not he wants me to.
Classes seemed to drag after that, my mind racing. What the fuck was I doing? He was a student. Would I have done the same with any other student in my class? The answer was a resounding no, but something about Ryan sucked me in, had from that very first day of class. It was wrong, but it didn’t stop me from walking across campus to his dorm and knocking on his door.
I was shocked when he opened it and I got my first good look at him in more than a week. His dark hair was sticking up all over the place, there were bruise-like circles under his eyes, and it looked as though he’d lost ten pounds. He looked like hell.
“Professor Marks? Uh, what’re you doing here?” He eyed me warily, as he probably should, since showing up at his dorm room was unprofessional at best, stalkerish at worst.
I cleared my throat. If I was going to do this, I’d come off as professional and courteous as possible. “I haven’t seen you in class in over a week.” Looking down at him, I confessed, “Sissy told me what happened. I’m here to talk.”
“I’m fine. I don’t need to talk.” He started to close the door but my hand shot out and grabbed it.
“Sissy is worried about you,” I said softly, trying to conceal the hope in my eyes at wanting him to confide in me. “I can be a really great listener.” He paused, then nodded his head and opened the door wider to allow me entry.
“I don’t know why she worries. It’s not like I’m going to do anything to hurt myself. I’m just grieving. My mom was the only family I had, well, I have my half sister, but she has her own life and we were never super close.” He kicked some clothes out of the way and sat down on his bed, leaning up against the cement block wall that was covered in posters. “My sister was raised by her grandma and she’s seven years older than me. Mom always felt bad about them taking Court away, so she did everything in her power to make sure the same didn’t happen to me.”
He twisted around, dropping his feet to the floor buried his face in his hands as quiet sobs racked his body. I dragged the desk chair over to where he was sitting and sat down next to him by the edge of the bed. Our knees brushed briefly and I sucked in a lungful of air before moving back a fraction. My hand came down on his knee and I squeezed. “It’s good to grieve for your loss, but would your mom want you to sit here alone, wallowing in that grief?” He looked up at me with red rimmed eyes. “Absolutely not. She’d want you to live. I’m aware of your scholarship, if your grades slip they could take that from you, Ryan.”
“Yeah,” he said attempting to take a few deep breaths and pull himself together. “It just hurts so fucking bad knowing that I wasn’t enough of a reason for her to get herself clean. I know it was a disease taking her life, but honestly, I don’t give a fuck about that at the moment.” His anger was palpable and well deserved, but it’d been a week of him holing himself up in this room alone, suffering alone.
“I know this sounds contrite, and while this is painful, it will get easier. As you progress through your degree—and you will, Ryan, make no mistake—you’ll understand more of the anatomy of an alcoholic and drug addict. It may not be of comfort to you now, but eventually you’ll learn to forgive her.”
Anger flashed in his eyes as he jumped off the bed, pushing me back, and screamed the most guttural heartbreaking sound I’d ever heard in my life.
“I don’t want to forgive her! She left me. That’s the one thing she always promised she wouldn’t do.” He slammed his hand down on his desk. The container full of pencils fell over scattering across the floor. “I did everything for her. I work two jobs so she has a place to stay and a phone to call me. I put food in her fridge every week. Yet, she couldn’t even keep the one promise she made to me.” His hands were braced on the desk, his head slumped forward, and I couldn’t hold myself back anymore. I walked over and wrapped my arms around him; it was
like the dam burst inside of him. He turned around, then buried his face in the crook of my neck as loud racking sobs tore through his body.
I knew what I’d said was the truth about him eventually forgiving her, but he was still so raw there was no way he’d be able to accept anything until he passed through the overwhelming sadness and anger. “Shhh, it’s okay, I’m here. I’m not judging you, Ryan. If you need to cry, do it. If you need to get angry and throw things, I’ll sit quietly and watch that you don’t hurt yourself. The one thing you aren’t is alone.” I rubbed his back soothingly before I realized what I was doing. Ryan must have gotten the same weird tension because he sniffled before taking a step back.
“Thank y-you,” he stammered. “I’m okay now.”
“Right.” I cleared my throat, shifting from foot to foot, taking a step back from him, now completely uncomfortable with the tension radiating from him. “I, uh, brought the work you missed the last week.” Walking back over to the front door, I grabbed my satchel and dug around for the packet of papers I’d printed for him. He took a few hesitant steps forward and our fingers brushed as I handed him the assignment. A spark of electricity sizzled up my arm and I drew my arm back quickly.
“I’ll be in class Monday with all of this done.” His eyes refused to meet mine.
“My personal cell number is on that card in case you need to talk.”
“Is that... allowed?” He finally looked up.
“Look, Ryan, I’m just a professor making sure that a student is okay. It’s my responsibility, not only as a teacher here, but knowing what had happened, it’s the right thing to do.” I shrugged casually.
“None of my other professors have come to my dorm offering to talk or leaving me their phone numbers.” He pointed out with a lifted eyebrow.
“Look, use the number, or don’t. I don’t really care. I was just offering my help if you need it.” So what if I was a bit righteous in defending myself? He was acting as though I had ulterior motives—and as much as there was something about him, the person before me was in pain, and I’d never cross that line of causing someone more.
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