by Nicole Casey
I was stung by the assessment.
“Of course I wouldn’t!” I snapped, my face flushing red with annoyance. “You don’t know anything about me!”
She cocked her blonde head to the side and reached for a cigarette. Even in a non-smoking restaurant, she insisted on lighting up.
“No,” she agreed. “I don’t know anything about you, but I bet you aren’t married.”
I scoffed.
“I would say that many divorce attorneys have a difficult time taking marriages seriously,” I replied. “That doesn’t mean that I haven’t treasured my relationships.”
Her eyebrows raised.
“Is that a fact?” she demurred. “When was the last time you had a serious girlfriend?”
I found the line of questioning uncomfortable and I shifted my eyes away.
“This isn’t about me, Angie. This is about you, Ryerson and your settlement.”
“Why don’t you want to talk to me about your exes?” she asked. “Is it because you have regrets? Maybe you regret that you let them get away when you should have been man enough to chase after her and learn what was wrong instead of sweeping it under the rug. But then again, I bet you’re so consumed by your career that love was just a trite concept to you. I bet you were happy to see her go instead of letting her hold you back.”
She smiled coldly.
“I know Ryerson feels that way. He just doesn’t want to give me my due.”
My hands became fists under the table.
“You don’t need to take your anger out on me. I am not Ryerson!” I growled but I wondered why her words had me so incensed.
And I wondered why I couldn’t get Yvette out of my mind.
Things slowed down considerably after that, the offers and counteroffers slowing to a snail’s pace.
Angeline almost became an afterthought as my caseload grew but somehow her words always sat in the back of my mind, like a spot of dust overlooked in a house cleaning.
Things between Yvette and I were chilled.
She barely acknowledged me in the office, but she wasn’t rude either.
We communicated by email mostly, despite our desks being a few hundred feet away from each other.
On the last week of April, she surprised me by appearing in my office and I could tell by her face that she had unpleasant news.
Still, I found myself noticing that the cherry lipstick she wore accentuated her perfect mouth beautifully.
If I closed my eyes, I could almost remember what she tasted like and in that moment, I was filled with a stab of longing so deep, I almost gasped.
“What is it?” I asked without preamble. I knew she wasn’t there on a social call.
“I have filed with the court. Mr. Sterling is tired of waiting for this matter to be resolved and frankly, Vern is anxious to get this settled. Our court date is three weeks Monday.”
Angeline was not going to like the news any more than I did.
Goodbye senior partner.
I nodded.
“Fine,” I replied. “It’s probably for the best.”
She turned to leave but as she did, I could read a peculiar expression on her face.
“Hey,” I called out. “Maybe when this is all over and done with, we can resume our coffee dates in the mornings.”
Her mouth parted in surprise, but no sound came out.
Instead, she nodded but her demeanor did not indicate much confidence.
Disappointment swept through me, but I silenced it instantly.
I had to have known that things would never go back to the way they had been before, but I didn’t want to accept it.
We had a history together, a long, complicated story which had never been fully resolved.
We have to overcome whatever animus we had before the Sterlings appeared, the stuff we never talked about, I realized.
“Yve,” I tried again, and I saw how uncomfortable she appeared.
We can do this another time, I thought. After all the dust has settled.
Yet I knew that we never would.
I had to do it then.
“What is it, Draven?” she asked, and I inhaled sharply.
“Why did you leave me?”
Her skin seemed to turn translucent before my eyes and I thought her legs were going to buckle beneath her.
“What?” she gasped, gaping at me. “Why are you bringing that up now?”
“Because we’ve never addressed it. You left me a note, disappeared back here and when I saw you again, I was engaged as if you and I had never happened. We spent years sticking our heads in the sand, but we’ve never talked about it.”
“Now is not the time,” Yvette mumbled, glancing furtively at the door as if she was worried we were being overheard.
But I didn’t care.
Saying the words aloud was somehow freeing.
“It’s never the time,” I insisted. “I want to know why you left me.”
She laughed nervously.
“You got my letter. We weren’t getting along, Drave. I wanted to come home and be near my family for law school and you wanted to stay in New York. Your temper made me nervous and I felt like I really didn’t have another choice but to leave.”
“You slunk off in the middle of the night,” I cried. “And you never called me again!”
“Keep your voice down!” she hissed, stepping into the office and closing the door. “We were kids, Draven. It was a long time ago and we both moved forward.”
“You left me without the benefit of telling me face-to-face!”
Yvette stared at me and for a moment, I thought she was going to storm away.
But she didn’t.
Instead, she walked toward me, her blue eyes bright with something I couldn’t identify.
“And you couldn’t have cared less,” she replied quietly. “You didn’t call or email. You didn’t even check in on Facebook to see if I was alive.”
“I knew you were alive!” I snapped. “And you told me not to contact you. I was trying to respect your wishes!”
“No,” she said softly. “You were happy to see me go. I knew you would be and you proved it.”
My jaw dropped in amazement.
“If you believe that, you’re insane,” I stated flatly. “I have never been more devastated in my life than I was when you left.”
Yvette shook her head, a serene smile on her lips.
“No, Drave. You were focused on school and grades. You never noticed me, not really. When I left, you felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders. I knew that you wouldn’t fight for me because I was never what you wanted.”
She gulped visibly, and I could see the whites of her eyes grow damp.
Every word she spoke was like a knife to my heart.
“No,” I whispered. “That’s not true.”
She reached out and touched my face then and I grabbed her hand, pressing her palm against my lips eagerly.
“I wasn’t mad,” she assured me. “I think in my heart, I always knew that your mind was on your career. Any relationship would have always fallen flat in comparison.”
“No!” I moaned, my mouth working its way up her forearm. “None of it is true, Yve.”
Her free hand reached out to stroke my hair, pulling me slightly toward her chest and I buried my face into her ample bosom, trying to block out how everything had gone so wrong.
This is how Ryerson lost Angeline. She believed he didn’t care about her because he didn’t fight for her. How could I have let Yve think that I didn’t love her all this time?
A low moan escaped my lips as Yvette’s fingers entwined in my hair.
I felt her heartbeat increase as I slid my palms down her back, cupping her rear over her fitted pants.
She shrugged out of her blazer and my teeth worked against the buttons of her blouse, our movements clumsy and quick.
We had wasted so much time apart. I didn’t want one more minute to go by without her knowing how d
eeply I felt for her.
A black lace bra enhanced her already perky breasts and my tongue tasted the skin around the material, my grip on her buttocks tightening.
I nudged the bra aside, my lips closing in around the already taut nipple and Yvette sighed.
“I’ve been thinking about you lately,” she whispered, and my teeth gnashed gently at the tender skin.
She jumped at the motion, straddling me on the chair and allowing her blouse to slip to the floor.
Touching her, kissing her, feeling the curves of her body brought back so many entombed emotions, I became dizzy with desire.
She sat back slightly, and I reluctantly pulled my lips from her chest as she undid her pants, grinding her hips against my ever-growing erection.
Even through the thickness of the cotton, I felt her heat on my crotch.
I needed to taste her.
Scooping her up, she yelped in surprise as I deposited her firm rear on the desk, sweeping aside the papers and pens obstructing our path.
Yve kicked off her shoes as I slipped her pants and nylons away, exposing the pink flesh of her center.
She was so beautiful, and I stared at her, wanting to remember her exactly in that way for posterity.
Her eyes were wide with longing and I finally leaned in to brush my lips against hers.
The kiss was charged with electricity, but I had not forgotten my quest and I traveled down across her body, propping her calves on my shoulders as my tongue licked sweetly in one long stroke.
Yvette moaned, locking her ankles at my neck and I dove into her like the delicacy she seemed to be.
Her waist moved up and down, meeting the rhythm of my licks and her swollen button seemed to pulsate in my mouth.
When she climaxed, she cried out, uncaring of who heard, her body shaking with ecstasy.
She was still in there, the girl I had fallen in love with all those years ago and she was writhing beneath me as I unbuckled my belt, but she had other ideas.
Sliding off the platform, she helped me along, pulling my trousers to my knees and pushing me back onto the swivel chair behind me.
Falling forward onto her naked knees, she looked up at me and I felt another surge of blood rush into my crotch, my erection almost painful as she stared up at me with warm, blue eyes.
My mouth parted, a groan escaping as her palm caressed my sack softly, her fingers kneading at me both hard and tender.
“I’ve missed you,” she murmured before taking me fully into her throat.
It was all I could do to hold on as her tongue spiraled along my shaft, warm and wet but I closed my eyes and forced myself not to explode.
I had not waited this long to be with her, only to end things so abruptly but she was making in incredibly difficult as her motions grew more vigorous, her nails raking along my tension.
Yve’s mouth grew tighter and I moaned, knowing I was close to eruption as my hands moved from their clenched position on the armrests to the mass of curls on her bobbing head.
She fought me; of course, she did but I managed to disentangle myself from her, gasping to hold back my release.
Licking her lips, the coy, glistening smile on her mouth she cocked her head as if to challenge me.
I grunted in a primal fashion, leaping to my feet but she seemed ready for me this time and she fell back against the desk again, propping her rear up to allow me between her legs.
Her toes curled around the edge of the desk as I slid myself inside, holding onto her knees for support.
“I had forgotten how big you are,” she gasped, and the statement only made harder, something I could barely afford to have happen.
We locked gazes and I fell forward, driving myself deep and fluidly inside her, relishing the look of shocked pleasure on her face.
Never had I felt more alive than I had in that moment as if I had been sleeping for years and woken up ravenous.
Her legs wrapped around my back and I felt my sack grow tense.
Our eyes bored into one another and suddenly, her stare went glassy as her mouth parted again.
I felt her hotness surge against my shaft and I exhaled, knowing I could cum too.
With one final, deep push, I grunted loudly and joined her in release.
More items clattered to the floor as she shivered with delight but neither of us noticed.
We were lost in one another’s eyes as if nothing else existed.
“I have always loved you,” I told her when my gasps subsided. I withdrew from her slowly and placed another kiss on her mouth.
“I am so sorry you thought I didn’t care about you all this time.”
As if a mask fell over her face, Yve lost the sweetness and regained her stoic expression.
She rolled away from underneath him and began to collect herself.
“That was a different time, Drave,” she said. “That was before we knew what we know about life and love.”
I was slightly stunned by the words and I stared at her, but she didn’t meet my eyes.
“You don’t feel the same way about me?” I demanded. “What was this all about?”
She laughed shortly.
“This was sex, Drave. There’s no reason to get emotional about it.”
I grabbed her arm to stop her from dressing and she looked at me tiredly.
“Why are you saying that? Because you mean it or because you’re afraid of being hurt again?”
Yvette’s mouth turned downward in the corners and she shifted her eyes away.
“I took a page from your book, Draven,” she told me.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“It means I care about my career now,” she said shortly. “I don’t have time or patience for relationships.”
The words stung me, but I did not let that show.
“I see,” I said slowly.
I need to go slowly with her, I thought. She is far too skeptical to jump into this again.
“I’m glad we talked though,” she offered as she slipped on her pumps. “I feel a lot better.”
She gave me a kiss on the cheek and walked toward the door.
“When the Sterlings are all settled, we’ll go grab dinner,” I called out to her.
She paused and slowly turned.
“I don’t think you’ll feel that way after this goes through,” she told me quietly.
“Why not? Yve, I don’t want this to be some one-night stand!”
She chewed on her lower lip.
“Because after the Sterlings are settled, Drave, I’m being made senior partner.”
10
Yvette
There was that smell in the air, the one which floods you with nostalgia and yearning for no reason other than you long for another place or time.
Of course where and when that might be is lost in the recesses of your mind and I shoved the threat of melancholy from my mind as I stared into the bonfire, clenching and unclenching my fists.
I shouldn’t have agreed to the trip, but I was there, and I couldn’t very well sneak away.
They do this on purpose, I thought with bitter wryness, brushing a stray strand of dark hair out of my bright blue eyes. They bring us to the middle of nowhere and trap us like a bunch of rats in a science experiment to see how we’ll react.
I knew I was just being dramatic.
No reason for me to become a basket case but I couldn’t shake the sense of sadness and anger which had followed me to the Butterfield Ranch.
I knew exactly why I was in such a mood but that did little to alleviate it, what, with the sweet burning of firewood teasing my nostrils and the distant hoot of owls like some cliché movie on the Hallmark channel.
At least I was in relative solitude.
Most of my counterparts had moved to the hall for drinks and dancing, although some of my fellow attorneys had started imbibing from noon and had already fallen asleep in their respective cabins.
It was the last night after all.
I should have been enjoying it too.
As if the universe mocked my inane thought, I saw a shadow approaching from just beyond the tree line and I knew who it was even before he appeared.
“Oh,” he said, freezing as he recognized me sitting alone by the flames. “I didn’t realize anyone was here.”
“Well now you do,” I replied shortly but I wished I didn’t sound so cold. I wasn’t mad at him. I wanted to make things right, but I had no words to do it, not anymore.
It seemed that any attempt to iron things out between us was only making it worse.
Draven scoffed slightly as I expected he would.
“Contrary to popular belief, Yve, you don’t own the airspace, especially not out here in the middle of nowhere.”
I glared at him, my lips pursing in annoyance.
“Fine,” I retorted. “If it makes you feel like you’ve won, by all means, take it.”
I rose to my feet, shaking my head at his childishness.
Draven laughed aloud.
“You really think you’ve got the upper hand in all this, don’t you? You get the bigger commission, the better job, the admiration of everyone – “
“Drave, I’m really not about to get into this with you here,” I snapped. “I am supposed to be on vacation and you are not a victim.”
I didn’t add that if I had known how things were going to manifest between us, I would never have signed up for the weekend.
But the trip was non-refundable, and I had reasoned that I wouldn’t be forced to spend much time with him.
No more than at the office anyway.
Still, I could have used the reprieve, especially that weekend.
Or so I told myself.
Deep down, I knew that I had wanted to catch him alone but to what end, I couldn’t say.
I could feel his animosity almost like a slap in the face and I knew that we were not going to overcome whatever anger we had between us.
I spun around, unwilling to engage in what I knew would result in a fight.
It made my heart hurt to do it because what I really wanted was to throw myself into his arms and beg him to start over again.
What would it take to walk away from all of this and start somewhere brand new?