by Amity Cross
The woman gave me a look and I wondered if she thought I was a fan or a groupie and my face started to heat in embarrassment.
"The studios are closed to the public," she said.
"It's not like that," I said. "I'm looking for Rob Hancock. He said he was here with Affliction. He helped me the other night. I was being mugged...I…I wanted to say thanks I guess." I shrugged, feeling like the village idiot.
The woman looked at me, curiosity replacing skepticism.
"My name's Lilly. Lilly Hunter."
She nodded, pushing her chair away from the desk. "Have a seat. I'll see if he's here."
My hands started to shake as I sat down and I felt like throwing up. What the hell was I doing? I could still make a break for it. The doors were just there…a handful of steps and I could be outside. It wasn't too late.
"Lilly?"
My heart jack-hammered at the sound of his voice and I glanced up into the eyes of Rob Hancock, the man who'd saved me. My palms started to sweat. I was just going to say thank you…wasn't I?
I stood abruptly. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come."
"Lilly." He grabbed my hand, stopping me from fleeing like a scared little girl. "Please."
"I don't know why I came. I-"
Rob glanced at the receptionist who was staring at us like we were acting out a scene from Days of Our Lives.
"C'mon," he said, tugging me through a door and into a long hallway. The muted sounds of music filled the air and I glanced around curiously. It was like another world. Quiet. Peaceful.
"Am I allowed?" I whispered like I was in a library.
Rob didn't answer, he just tugged on my hand harder and I almost had to jog to keep up with him.
A tall, buff, tattooed guy who I recognized as Jake West was standing in the hall, staring right at me and I felt my face redden yet again. His gaze flickered to our joined hands, then to Rob, who didn't even look at him. He yanked me past the guy and into an empty office.
"I'm sorry," I muttered as the door closed. He was angry with me. I shouldn't have come. "I didn't mean… I don't know…"
His hand cupped my cheek and my gaze snapped up to meet his, startled. I didn't know what it was, but I just wanted to be around him. That same tingling was there from the other night in the hospital.
"Shh," he whispered. "I'm glad you're here."
"You are? I thought I was being a bit too stalker-ish."
He laughed, brushing his thumb across my cheek. It was a little too personal for my comfort levels, so I shrunk back, his hand falling away.
"I should've asked you for your number," he said. "To make sure you were okay."
"I don't know if I want to give it to you."
"You're always welcome to stop by."
A small smile tugged at my lips.
"You're a puzzle, you know that?"
"I'm not very complicated."
"Never apologize, Lilly. Never apologize for wanting to see me, okay?"
I apologized a lot. If I apologized then I'd go to bed without the promise of a blackening bruise when I woke up. It was just a part of life. I'd done it for so long, it was just second nature now.
He was frowning at me. "How's the cut on your arm?"
"Okay." I glanced down and pulled up the arm of my shirt. It was just a pink line now. In a few days it'd almost be gone.
"Look, I've gotta go back, but-" He hesitated, looking toward the door. "Do you want to come watch?"
"Is it-" He placed a finger over my lips and I swear I almost came on the spot.
"If I didn't want you there, I wouldn't invite you."
I smiled, my skin starting to tingle in the most delicious way. "Okay."
He led me back out into the now empty hallway, my hand squashed in his. There were a few doors that seemed to lead into different studios and offices like the one we'd been in and he opened the door that Jake West had been standing beside when we came in.
There were a few people in the studio all gathered around an enormous soundboard full of buttons and switches and all kinds of stuff. They glanced up as we came in, their gaze flickering to me, the purple-haired weirdo and I was tempted to stick my tongue out at them.
"You good to go?" a tall, tattooed guy asked. "Or are you..."
"I'm good," Rob said, his voice clipped.
The guy frowned. "Right then. Ready when you are."
Rob turned to me, his entire expression easing into something a little lighter. "I'm just through here, okay?" he said, squeezing my hand.
I rolled my eyes. "I'm not a child."
His gaze ran right over me, from head to toe and everywhere in between and I felt myself flushing for the millionth time that day. "No. No, you're not."
I shoved him through the door, a smile on my face and watched as he sat behind a drum kit and pulled on a set of headphones - the big kind that covered his ears with a curly cord that ran to some unknown outlet.
He hit out a couple of beats, I didn't know what they were called, the muscles in his arms flexing. I shook my head, realizing I'd been swooning.
"He's really good," a woman with long wild brown hair said to me.
I nodded, glancing back through the glass. I didn't know anything about music, but I guess being in a pretty famous band meant you needed to be.
"I'm Blair," the woman said.
"Lilly."
"Are you from LA?" she asked.
"I live here." I wasn't very good at making friends, so I didn't say anything else.
The conversation pretty much died in the ass then, so I just watched Rob play. I didn't know anything about music, or what all the buttons and knobs on the soundboard meant, so I just listened to the rhythms he was playing.
"Do you like this kind of music?" Blair asked and I instantly gave her points for still trying.
"Yes. I like it," I said. Glancing around, I realized everyone was trying their hardest not to look at me. The guy in the corner with the messy hair, the clean-cut tattooed guy next to the woman with the black hair…and Jake West. They were all pretending to do other things while watching me. Was I an exhibit in a fucking zoo or some shit?
"I'm sorry, but aren't I supposed to be here? I mean, he asked." I pointed to Rob through the glass, who was oblivious. "I can go-"
"No," the woman with the black hair said. "You're totally welcome to be here. I'm Sasha, their manager."
"They're just curious," Blair said offering me a smile. "Boys." She made a face to demonstrate her point.
"Curious?"
"Rob's never invited a woman to anything before. Especially not a fuckin' recording session," the clean-cut guy said.
"Mick," Sasha scolded him.
"It's true."
"Oh," I declared, trying not to turn red. "It's not like that. I mean, I came to say thanks."
The guy named Mick snorted and yelped when Sasha slapped him around the head. "Hey."
I glared at them, at their stupid assumptions, and turned back to watch Rob through the glass. I wasn’t here to give him some kind of reward…oral sex in a dark corner, a quick fuck out back. I wasn’t that cheap. I’d never be that person, someone to be used as a thing, ever again.
As the song came to an end, Rob glanced up and caught me staring and winked.
“Nice one,” the guy by the sound board said through a little intercom.
“Done?” Rob asked, his voice sounding all small and muted through the speaker.
“Done and fuckin’ dusted."
He tossed his drumsticks on the floor and ripped off the headphones, messing up his hair. He watched me as I watched him cross the studio and come back out the door. He stopped in front of me and the whole awkward scene with his friends completely disappeared from my radar.
"Going to get lunch," Rob drawled, not looking at anyone. He didn't even wait for an answer, he just curled an arm around my waist and yanked me from the room like we were performing some sort of comedy routine.
Outside, I twisted away. I didn’t like being led. It
was like that first taste of freedom when I’d gotten on that plane. There was nobody to please but myself and I’d go down kicking and screaming to keep it.
“Sorry, I had to get that track down,” Rob said, as we walked down the sidewalk. “They weren’t assholes, were they?”
“It’s okay. They just seemed surprised that I was there.”
“Fuck them.”
“Are you having a fight or something?” I asked.
Rob snorted and I knew that was probably all the answer I was getting. He stopped out the front of a little cafe and held the door open for me. “Are you hungry? My treat."
My up and down mood was probably giving him whiplash, so I smiled and went inside. It was just lunch and if he was buying… Fuck it. I sat at a little table by the window and instead of taking the chair opposite, he took the one next to mine, jamming himself as close to me as he could. Men.
“How are you doing, really?” he asked and I glanced down at my hands.
Scared. Living on a knife’s edge. Always killing myself to be one step ahead. Sleepless. Worried. How could I explain all of that? Fuck, and it had nothing to do with the guy who’d tried to mug me the other night. I was actually fine with that now. There were bigger monsters in the world.
“Lilly?”
“I’m okay.”
“Are you sure, because you’re not doing much to convince me.”
“I’ve just got a lot on my mind at the moment,” I countered. “Work is kicking my ass.”
“What do you do?”
“Nothing glamorous,” I replied. “I work at a bar down the street.”
“Which one?”
“The Lightbox.”
“I know it.”
I began to wonder if I’d seen him there before but instantly dismissed the idea. I definitely would’ve remembered Rob Hancock. He had this air around him, some kind of electricity, and some kind of spark that made me want to stare at him for the rest of eternity. Dark, almost black eyes, sharp jaw, almost boyish features set off by a couple of days worth of stubble, toned arms, sexy fucking tattoos… He really needed a hair cut...
“What are you doing tomorrow night?”
“What?” I asked, realizing I’d been caught ogling him.
“Are you doing anything tomorrow night?” he asked again with a sexy lopsided grin, which meant he’d liked it, but all guys liked being checked out.
“Are you asking me out?” The thought sent little butterflies tumbling through my stomach right into my lady bits. A good kind of tumbling...
“Sure.”
I wanted to say yes. I wanted to scream it at him, because I felt something. Something I wanted to grab hold of so desperately...but I couldn’t. Glancing away, I shook my head. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
I shrugged. “I just…I can’t.” I stiffened as I felt his fingertips brush against mine under the table and my body responded instantaneously. I squeezed my thighs together like it’d douse the flame. Damn it.
“So, you’re saying you’re not attracted to me?” He bit on his bottom lip and fuck it sent sparks into all the right bits all over again.
“Rob, please,” I scolded, shifting my chair so he couldn’t reach me. Why the fuck did he have to make this so hard? He didn’t seem to want to let it go, but that was probably my fault for being weak and turning up at the studio.
“If you don’t want to go out on a date, then lets just hang out as mates.”
“Mates?”
“Friends."
The moment I began to cave, I heard the lid slam closed on my coffin. I stared at him and from the stupid grin on his face, he knew he had me. I felt the urge to slap it right off, but that other sound that just pounded into my heart? It was the nails in said coffin slamming home.
There was absolutely no will power left when I said, “Okay."
“Where can I take you? What do you like?”
I shrugged.
“Restaurant?”
“No, I don’t really…”
“We can just hang at the hotel,” he said, leaning closer. “Room service is pretty good."
“Cheeky fucker,” I said, starting to laugh. Fuck, laughing felt so good after the chaos that was the past few days.
“We can order stupid amounts of food, watch a movie, talk, whatever you want.”
“Whatever I want?” I asked. “Like twenty questions?”
“Exactly.”
“You know, I never got to twenty…”
“We can pick up where we left off.”
A stupid grin spread across my face and I couldn’t stop it. He made me feel so…comfortable. “Promise?”
“Cross my heart.”
I rested the urge to reach up and shove him. “When? I’m working until ten."
“Whenever you get there."
He gave me the details of the hotel and it was this posh place downtown. He was so down to earth it was easy to forget who he was and how loaded his bank account was because of it. This was either going to be a monumental mistake, or something dark and twisty and it would be all my fault.
Rob just smiled lazily, like he knew I’d cave all along. I was in so much fucking trouble.
Rob
I almost fucking died when I saw Lilly sitting out front of the studio.
She was the last person I was expecting to see, especially after the way she’d left me at the hospital. Then she was sitting there with her sexy tough exterior, all flustered and unsure of herself. Did she know the fuckin’ dangerous thoughts I’d been having about her? Unlikely.
I’d thought about her every single day. Not just how I wanted to stick my cock in her, but just being with her. Rob Hancock, just being with a woman and not having sex? Something was broken.
Lunch with Lilly Hunter was fuckin’...erotic. Her lips on the straw of her glass of lemonade had me hard and all I could think about was what she’d look like between my legs sucking my cock. I’d tangle my hands into her pretty purple hair and push her warm, wet mouth over my dick and she’d lick every drop of come I gave her like I was a fuckin’ ice-cream. Touching her only make me want it more. Giving her a friendly hug made me want to bend her over and fuck her right there on the street.
When I got back to the studio, I was still hard and I couldn’t make the fuckin’ thing go down, so I took ten in the men’s dunnies and beat off like a hormone fuelled kid. I imagined the little sounds she’d make as I fucked her, how tight her cunt would be around my dick, and the dirty words I’d whisper in her ear… Do you like my cock in you, Lilly? Do you like the way I fuck you? How much do you want it? I’d claim her everywhere. Nothing would be off limits.
She didn’t want to be anything more than friends, even though her body said differently, and tomorrow night would be fucking agony if I had to spend it with the boner that never went flat. I found myself not giving a flying fuck. I just wanted her there anyway I could. That was enough.
Walking into the studio, everyone was sitting around with takeout wrappers on the table, and all eyes were on me. I knew what they’d been talking about, it wasn’t a fuckin’ stretch to work it out.
West, Blair, Sasha, Mick and Joe were watching me like a science experiment. I didn’t know where Alexis was, but she’d probably be doing it, too.
“What?" I spat like a pissed off child.
“I had to do a double-take,” West declared. “Rob Hancock and a woman at the fuckin’ studio? Shit."
“I don’t know what her deal was,” Joe said. “I mean, she was feisty, then she was awkward all at the same time."
"She seems very…shy? Skittish?" Sasha didn't know either.
"She almost had her throat slit, so I think she's allowed to feel a little threatened by society," Blair said.
"She just needs to get to know us a little better," West said absently. "Then she'll open right up."
"You lot can be intimidating," Blair said, kicking West in the shin. "Not everyone is a hard ass like me."
; I glared at the lot of them. “I reckon it’s none of your fucking business.”
“Rob,” Joe said, sitting forward. “What the fuck’s going on with you, mate?"
How could I explain it and not sound like a kid chucking a temper tantrum? Sooner or later everybody abandoned me. Whether it was in the middle of the night, through distance, time, relationships…at the end of it all I was still here. Alone. Fuckin’ sucked.
Lilly seemed to want me, so I was going with that. If she didn’t want more, then I was happy with being mates. I’d take whatever scraps I could get.
“Do you need me this arvo?” I asked, zeroing in on Sasha.
“Not until tomorrow,” she began, but I was already shoving the door open. I was so fucking gone. I just needed a break from all the lovey-dovey in there. Made me wanna gag.
Instead of focusing on the shit that needed my attention, I thought about Lilly and the fact that I should’ve asked what she was doing right now, because I could’ve done that all afternoon and night. I still didn’t get her number and had to trust that she would turn up at the hotel tomorrow night.
Shit. Even I was starting to scare myself.
I stood in the middle of my hotel room, staring at the bulge in the front of my jeans. It was like I’d had a perpetual boner ever since I found Lilly in that alley. Shit, I was as randy as the next dude, but my cock did go down in between.
Looking at my watch, I wondered if I’d have enough time to rub one out before she got here…if she was coming at all. Pacing back and forth, I ran a hand through my messy hair, totally fucking agitated. When I used to feel like this, I’d just go out and score. I should just go out and find someone to screw before my balls blew apart from being so fucking tight. I was on struggle street. I didn’t know what to do with these stupid feelings that Lilly had dug up in me.
There was a knock at the door and I stopped my pacing and glanced through the peephole. Purple. I reached down and rearranged my cock so it wasn’t so obvious I was sporting a raging hard on. Waiting a minute so I didn’t look totally desperate, I opened the door.
She was wearing a plain black tank top and shorts, combat boots on her feet. Paired with her purple hair and tattooed arm, it was all she needed. Fuck, I wanted to press her against the doorjamb, rub my cock against her stomach and kiss her. I wanted to know what she tasted like…