by Anne Rice
"I'm aware of that," I said. I suppressed a little flash of anger. "I am yours now," I said, as difficult as it was to say this. A chill ran through me, an awful foreboding. "I belong to the realm. I know."
Suddenly Everard spoke up, the young blood drinker from Italy.
"But is this thing quiet inside you now?" he asked. "Is he quiet!"
A ripple of alarm ran through the gathering, though why I'm not sure. This question was on the mind of nearly everyone here. It had to be.
"Yes, Amel is quiet," I said. "Amel is satisfied. Amel is at peace."
"Or maybe he's somewhere else at this very moment, perhaps," said my mother.
"Yes," said Everard, "off making some more horrible trouble."
"No," I replied.
"But why?" asked Rhoshamandes. "Why is he content?" It was said with total sincerity, and for the first time in his face I saw a glimmer of actual pain.
I reflected for a moment before responding. Then:
"Because he can see and he can hear more clearly than ever," I said. "And this is what he's longed for. That's what he has always wanted. To see and hear and know in this world, the physical world, our world. And he is watching, and learning, as never before."
"But surely," said Zenobia, the diminutive friend of Gregory, "he saw and heard when he was in Akasha all that time, before Mekare ever came."
"No," I said. "He didn't. Because in those times, he didn't know how."
Pause.
The various amazing minds of the room pondered.
Inside me, Amel gave the softest most eloquent laugh with nothing of humor in it and everything of wonder that I could hope to hear.
I raised my hands for patience.
I had to sleep. And the morning was creeping up on the young ones with its sly burning fingers, and it would soon be creeping up even on me.
"Rose and Viktor," I said. "This day will be your last on Earth when the sun is visible to you and when the sun is your friend." I felt a sudden throb in my heart. I swallowed, trying to keep my voice steady. "Spend this day however you wish, but be wise and stay safe and come home to us at sunset ... to reaffirm your decision."
I saw my son beaming at me, and beside him Rose looking on in quiet wonder. I smiled. I put my fingers gently to my lips and let the silent kiss go.
I left the room quickly. There would be time to embrace them, and to weep, yes, to weep as I held their warm, tender mortal bodies in my arms, only some thirteen hours from now when the night threw its inevitable mantle once again across the great Savage Garden that was our world.
As I lay down to sleep in the French library, I spoke softly to Amel.
"You're quiet," I said, "strangely quiet but I know you are there."
"Yes, I'm here," he said. "And it's as you told them. Do you doubt your own explanation?" There was a pause but I knew he was going to say something more. "Years ago," he said, "when you were a mortal boy in your village in France you had a friend, a friend you loved."
"Nicolas," I said.
"And you and he would talk."
"Yes."
"By the hour, by the day, by the night, by the week and the month ..."
"Yes, always in those days when we were boys together, we would talk."
"Do you remember what you called it, your long flowing exchange?"
"Our conversation," I said. I marveled that he knew. Did he know because I knew? Could he search through my memory when I wasn't remembering? I was drowsy and my eyes were closing. "Our conversation," I said again. "And it went on and on...."
"Well, we are having 'our conversation,' aren't we?" he asked. "And our conversation will go on forever. There is no need for haste."
A great warmth came over me as if I'd been wrapped in a blanket of love.
"Yes," I whispered. "Yes."
29
Lestat
Pomp and Circumstance
AT SUNSET, the word went out that I would come before all in the park, at a deserted location well hidden from the mortal world. And as I set out to go, dressed in a new red-velvet coat and black pants and nice spiffy midcalf boots generously provided by Armand along with some old-fashioned lace at my throat, I discovered that Seth and Gregory were coming with me, that under no circumstances would they allow the Prince to walk amongst his people unguarded. Thorne and Flavius also accompanied us without a word.
I accepted it.
There were perhaps seventy-five fledglings in the gathering at eight o'clock and I had little difficulty greeting each with a clasp of hands and a promise that we would all work together to prosper. All had been young mortals when made, most dressed in black, some elegantly in old romantic nineteenth-century jackets or dresses, and others in the most exquisite black fashions of the present time, and still others were ragged, unkempt with matted hair--but all surrounded me with open hearts, with touching willingness to follow me and what I might demand. And one or two older ones were there, too, blood drinkers as old as Louis or myself. But there was no one older.
Taking a position in the middle of a circle, I explained that I was now their prince and I wouldn't fail them. I did not tell them yet that I contained the Sacred Core. I saw no reason for that to be announced in vulgar fashion in such a place, or for it to be announced by me personally at all. But I did assure them that the rampage of the Voice had been ended.
The darkness was soothing here, and there was a certain quiet, with the distant buildings of Manhattan flanking the park on either side, and the overhanging trees partially concealing us. But I knew I had to be quick. There were curious mortals about. And I wanted no disruption.
I told them all now that they were to be assured of my guidance.
"I'll soon set up my court to which you can come at any time, with rooms there for wayfarers, and all wayfarers. And the voice of Benji Mahmoud will never cease to offer you invaluable counsel. But if we are to cease from all battles and gang wars, and to live in secrecy and harmony with one another, then there must be rules, the very things I fought all my life, rules, and there must be a willingness on your part, for your own sake, to obey them."
Again came that soft but mighty roar I'd heard from them on the sidewalk before the townhouse only a night ago.
"You must leave this city," I said. "You must not congregate any more before Trinity Gate. Please, I ask that you agree to this."
There were nods, cries of affirmation, of "yes" from all sides.
"This city," I said, "great as it is, cannot sustain so many hunters, and you must find hunting grounds where you can feed on the evildoer and leave the innocent unmolested. Understand. This you have to do, and there is no escaping it."
Again came their chorus of praise and agreement. So eager, so innocent, they seemed, so charged with collective conviction.
"There is no reason under the moon and stars," I said, "why we cannot prosper. And prosper we will."
A louder roar, and the innermost circle pressing in even as Gregory and Seth gestured for them to hold where they were.
"Now, give me time," I said. "Give me opportunity. Wait to hear from me and I promise your patience will be rewarded. And spread the word far and wide that I am your leader now and you can trust in me and what we will all achieve together."
I then took my leave, once again clasping hands on both sides as Gregory, Seth, Flavius, and Thorne escorted me out of the park. We ignored a deluge of irrepressible questions I could not answer now.
When I entered the townhouse, I saw in the drawing room the unmistakable figures of Gremt Stryker Knollys and Magnus, along with an impressive white-haired ancient blood drinker, and other ghosts--striking ghosts as solid and real seeming as Magnus. The shining and cheerful ghost of Raymond Gallant was among them. Had he met with Marius? I certainly hoped so. But Marius wasn't there.
Armand was with them and so were Louis and Sevraine and they all stared silently at me as I came into the room. I was alarmed at the sight of this ancient blood drinker simply because he hadn
't come to us before. But I could see at once by the manner of everyone present that this was some sort of decorous or amicable meeting. And Seth and Gregory didn't follow me but remained in the hallway, with Flavius and Thorne, but they did not seem concerned.
Gremt and Magnus were robed as before, but this ancient blood drinker who gave me his name telepathically as "Teskhamen" wore a handsome modern suit of clothes. The other ghosts were all attired in the same way, except for the one woman ghost, who wore a fashionable long dress and a slim black coat. The group was very simply astonishing.
Did Louis and Armand know these were ghosts? Did they know this Gremt was a spirit? And who was this Teskhamen, a blood drinker who knew these ghosts obviously, but hadn't made himself known to us until now?
After a moment's hesitation, Louis left the company and Armand stepped back into the shadows. Sevraine gave a warm embrace to the blood drinker, and then took her leave as well.
The clock was chiming the half hour. I had only thirty minutes to be with Rose and Viktor.
I approached Gremt. I realized that the first time I'd encountered this spirit I'd found him intimidating. I hadn't admitted it to myself. But I knew it now because I was not in any way afraid of him. And a certain definite liking of him arose in me, a certain warming to him because I had seen emotions in him that I understood. He wasn't without emotion now.
"You know what's happened," I said. He was staring at me intently, staring, and perhaps staring through me, and through my eyes at Amel. I couldn't know. But Amel was quiet. Amel was there as he always would be, but not a sound came from him.
And not a sound came from Gremt either. That this being was in fact a spirit and not some species of biological immortal was almost impossible to grasp as I looked at him. He appeared so very vital, and so complex and obviously filled with feeling. He was not at ease.
"Soon," I said, "I want to talk to you, to sit down with you, if you will, and talk--with you and Magnus here and all of your little company. I'm going home as soon as I can to my father's house in France, in the country where I was born. Will you come to us there?"
Again, no response and then Gremt seemed to pull himself up, to force himself to be alert, and he gave a little shiver, and then spoke.
"Yes," said Gremt. "Yes, thank you, most definitely. We want very much to do that. Forgive us for interrupting you without warning. I realize that you're expected elsewhere. It's only that we could not stay away."
The blood drinker, Teskhamen, a spare white-haired being of considerable elegance, stepped forward. He introduced himself again with a soft agreeable voice. "Yes, you will forgive us, I hope, for coming to you so unexpectedly. But you see we are so eager for a meeting, and simply could not, after what has happened, remain away."
What did they know of what had happened? But then of course they knew. How could they not? Ghosts, spirits, what limits were there to what they could know? For all I knew they'd been in the house, present invisibly when I had taken Amel into me.
But it did seem this Teskhamen wanted to put me at ease.
"Lestat," he said warmly. "We are the ancient Elders of the Talamasca. You've been told this. We are the founders of the Order. In a sense, we are the real Talamasca and the enduring Talamasca--no longer in need of the mortal Order that survives--and we want to talk with you very much."
Armand standing silently against the wall said and did nothing.
"Well, I couldn't be more eager to talk to you myself," I said. "And I understand why you came. And I suspect I understand why you've cut loose your mortal scholars. I think I do, at any rate. But I need time to prepare my home in France, before I see you. And I ask that you come to me there, and soon."
"My name is Hesketh," said the woman, "and we are so longing for this meeting. We can't tell you how very much we want it." She had her smooth blond hair swept back from her face in rather beautiful waves, held in place by bits of pearl and platinum and then flowing over her shoulders in a timeless fashion.
She extended to me a gloved hand, a hand covered in soft gray kid leather, and of course it felt as vital as a human hand. I could feel the deceptive pulse in it. Why did they make themselves so perfectly physical? Her eyes were arresting, not only because they were such a dark shade of gray but because they were a little wider apart than most people's eyes, and that gave her face a certain mystery. All the details of her, eyelashes, eyebrows, succulent lips--were exquisitely convincing and fetching. I had to wonder precisely what accounted for this and the other gorgeous illusions I was seeing here. Was it skill, magnetism, aesthetic depth, genius? Was it the soul?
The other ghosts hung back. And one of them, a very personable young male, rather husky, with dark olive skin and curling black hair, appeared to have been weeping. I couldn't help notice that Armand was almost directly behind him and rather close to him. But there was no time for me to be noticing all these things, or puzzling over them.
"What makes us the physical beings we are? It is all of those things," said Gremt responding directly to my thoughts and of course reminding me that he could do this. "Oh, we have so much to tell you, so much to ... And we will come to you in France as soon as you tell us to come. We have a house there not very far at all from yours, a very old house that goes back to our earliest times together." He was cheerful suddenly and almost excited. "This has been our wish for so long." He stopped as if he'd said too much but his expression never really changed.
The ghost of Magnus, as solid as before, hung back, but there came from his face a look of love, of doting love.
This caught me off guard.
"Listen, my friends," I said. "There are important things happening under this roof tonight and I cannot invite you to remain and to sit down with us just now. You must trust me, and trust in my goodwill. But soon, under my roof in France, it's agreed, we will indeed come together." We were repeating ourselves, weren't we? This was like a dance.
"Yes," said Gremt, but his eyes were almost glazed, as though his physicality was as much at the mercy of his emotions and obsessions as that of a human.
Yet he didn't move to take his leave. None of them did. And suddenly I caught on. They were deliberately biding their time, drawing out the essentially formal and meaningless conversation because they were studying me at close hand. They were likely monitoring countless aspects of my physicality of which I was totally unaware.
They knew Amel was inside me. They knew that Amel and I were one. They knew that Amel was studying them, too, just as I was studying them, and as they were studying me.
I think something dark and slightly ominous must have appeared in my expression or my demeanor because all at once they seemed to react, to gather themselves up, to exchange infinitesimal signals and to look to Teskhamen for a decisive gesture or word.
"You will excuse me now, won't you?" I said, striving to be gracious, as gracious as I could. "There are others waiting for me. I'm leaving for home in a matter of nights to prepare a place for a wholly new--." I stopped. A wholly new what?
"A wholly new reign," said Magnus gently. There was the same loving smile on his lips.
"A wholly new era will suffice," I said. "I'm not sure I want it to be called a reign."
He smiled at this as though he found it not only impressive but somehow endearing. I didn't know whether I was feeling love or hatred for him. Well, it certainly couldn't be hatred. I was too completely happy to be alive.
I had the sense again that they were studying me in ways I couldn't fathom, searching my face and form for signs of what was within. Yet Amel was silent. Amel was not helping me with them. Amel was there, yes, but utterly quiet.
Teskhamen caught my hand. His was far colder than mine. It had the hard icy texture of the Children of the Millennia. But his face was very warm and he said, "Forgive us for troubling you on this night, and so soon. But we were eager to see you with our own eyes. And we will go now, yes. I give you my apologies for our conduct. I think we are more impetuous and perh
aps more excited than you can know."
"I understand," I said. "Thank you, my friends." But I couldn't repress my suspicions as they took their leave now, moving in a small loose body past me out of the drawing room into the hall and through the front door.
Armand went with them, his arm around the dark-haired ghost, the ghost who had been weeping, and the door was closed.
I realized that I was alone with Louis in the empty hallway. The others had gone.
"You know who they are?" I whispered.
"I know what they told me," he said, walking along with me. "And I know what they told you. And the others obviously know who they are and they're not afraid of them. Yet all wait for you to take command, you to come, you to greet them and invite them to your home in France. You are the leader, Lestat, no doubt about it. All know it. And these ghosts and spirits or whoever they are--they know it too."
I stopped. I put my arm around him. I held him close to me.
"I'm Lestat," I said in a low voice. "Your Lestat. I'm the same Lestat you've always known, and no matter how I'm changed, I'm still that same being."
"I know," he said warmly.
I kissed him. I pressed my lips to his and I held this kiss for a long silent moment. And then I gave in to a silent wave of feeling, and I took him in my arms. I held him tight against me. I felt his unmistakable silken skin, his soft shining black hair. I heard the blood throbbing in him, and time dissolved, and it seemed I was in some old and secret place, some warm tropical grotto we'd once shared, ours alone in some way, with the scent of sweet olive blossoms and the whisper of moist breeze. "I love you," I whispered.
In a low intimate voice, he answered: "My heart is yours."
I wanted to weep.
But there was no time.
At that moment, Gregory and Seth reappeared with Sevraine, and Sevraine told me that they had seen to the ballroom and all was in readiness. Marius and Pandora were prepared. The candles had been lighted.
"I'm sorry about our unexpected guests," said Sevraine. "It seems a true prince is much in demand. But you go now to those waiting for you."
Viktor and Rose were in the French library.