by Debra Kayn
Kurt stopped when he reached Taylor's side. "Can you stick with Risa while I fight? She's having a hard time."
Warmth flooded her face. She wanted to argue Kurt's opinion, and make a good impression with his family, but he'd spoken the truth.
"You bet." Taylor linked her arm under Risa's elbow. "We can warn each other when to close our eyes."
Kurt kissed Taylor's forehead. "It'll be fine."
Then he turned to Risa and kissed her mouth. "Stay, and do not go up to my room."
"Then win and I won't have to," she whispered, kissing him quickly. "And, hurry."
Less than fifteen minutes later, Kurt stood in the ring, bouncing on his bare feet, hands taped, and looking like a sculpted statue. Long, hard muscles lined his arms. His shoulders bulged with strength. Risa's head pounded, and she wanted to throw up. In the ring, Kurt was almost unrecognizable from the man who only moments ago had his face between her legs.
Gone was the half smile that was always slow in coming. His attention went to Ink on the other side of the mat, and not her. She clasped Taylor's hand. Even Kurt's gaze mystified her. He stared intently, but all emotions were blocked. It was like looking at a stranger.
"Keep telling yourself that it's Kurt, and once the fight is over, you'll have the Kurt you know in your arms." Taylor leaned against her for support. "He's always very serious, but when he fights, I'm not even sure he'd recognize his own father. I've tried to understand why he needs to box, and I'll never understand why he'd choose to put his body through the abuse."
"I don't like him fighting, and it hasn't even started," Risa confessed. "What made him start?"
Taylor stared at Kurt. Risa thought maybe she didn't hear her question or she was out of bounds at asking such a personal one.
"His mom." Taylor turned her gaze to Risa. "I've never said that to anyone, not even Slade...though I'm sure he's figured it out. I don't know how much Kurt has shared with you, so it's not my place to say, but his childhood wasn't easy. I did the best I could to give him a mother figure, but he was older than Lee and already so, so angry when I came into Slade's life. That kind of anger never goes away, honey. It eats at a person, until there are only two choices left. Succumb to the anger or fight. Kurt fought, and continues to fight."
Risa swallowed, studying Kurt. Her chest tightened for the little boy that he was, and for the man he grew up to be. She knew exactly what it was like to hate your mother and yet love her at the same time. No matter the consequences or the relationship, his mom was still his mother.
"I see..." Risa inhaled swiftly when Torque rang the bell. "Oh, God. I hate this."
A fight to the finish.
No ref.
No rules.
No prize.
Both fighters matched in height and weight, danced around each other. Risa sucked in her lips and bit down, prepared for the first punch. Ink moved toward Kurt.
Ink lunged forward and back, testing Kurt, who seemed in no hurry. The waiting forced her to watch. She wanted them to start, but she didn't. She glanced at Taylor who worked her lips in worry. God, she should've grabbed her purse, just in case she really would need to save Kurt's life.
Kurt jabbed, catching Ink on the shoulder and knocking him back a foot. Oh, shit.
The loud smack of Ink's fist against Kurt's stomach echoed in the room, setting the Bantorus members to cheering.
The strength and control Kurt displayed surprised her. His broad chest bulged with his movements. Warmth settled in her lower stomach. There was no denying Kurt was gorgeous, but in the ring, his attention focused on winning, he blew her away. It was as if the adrenaline fed his soul and he was in his element.
Confident and trained, he bounced on his feet. She bit down on her lip. Every single inch of his body, toned and hard, was a beautiful sight. She inhaled. The sweat and testosterone filled the room and left her weak.
She wanted to hate what he was doing, but how could she when she could see with her own eyes that he loved fighting? She'd have to deal with the outcome, whatever that may be.
Taylor shifted beside her. Risa looked over and found Slade beside his wife with his arm around her. Kurt's father lifted his chin at her, his gaze softening. She nodded. If his family could handle him fighting, she could at least pretend she was brave.
The noise from the bikers grew louder the faster the punches came. Ink's body covered in sweat had Kurt's solid hits sliding off, making a sickening sound. Kurt's head snapped to the side on Ink's blow, and Kurt shook it off.
"He's okay. He's okay," Taylor chanted, slipping her hand out of Risa's hold and putting her arm around Risa's waist.
Thankful for the support, Risa clasped her hands together and held them below her chin. She wanted to push everyone away and stop the fight. Yet, she couldn't look away. Kurt danced closer to Ink, fire in his eyes, energy bouncing off him.
Pop.
Blood squirted out of Ink's nose at the hit. Kurt weaved right, and hit Ink again in the upper stomach. Risa gagged, squeezing her eyes closed and opening them immediately to make sure Kurt was okay.
Ink rose and swung wildly, left, right, left. A direct hit to Kurt's chin only snapped his head back and he was on the attack. Nothing deterred Kurt, he rebounded, throwing punches, until Ink fell to his knee. Kurt stepped away, blank eyed and emotionless. Risa's stomach rolled and she covered her mouth. How much longer would they go?
"Come on, Ink, kick his ass. I got a hundred dollars on this fight," German yelled.
Raul whistled. "He's the champ. You're only losing your money, amigo."
Risa shook her head. They were betting on the outcome, and no longer thought of the damage being done to both their MC brothers.
Stripper and Sawyer pushed each other on the opposite side of the ring, pumped up over the fight. Risa blinked to clear her vision. She could no longer see which fighter was winning or making the most hits. The rowdy crowd deafened her to the grunts of the boxers.
Kurt swung his arm up, clipping Ink under the chin. Risa cried out when Ink rallied hitting back. Kurt dodged the fists aimed at him, only succeeding half the time. Blood dotted his brow and his eye swelled.
"I can't do this," she muttered, but nobody heard her.
She shuffled her feet backward, but Taylor's arm brought her back to her side. At the same time, Kurt backed Ink into the ropes, and he swung his left fist and connected with the side of Ink's face.
Ink landed flat on the mat, unmoving. The crowd moved in, blocking her view. Deafened from the cheers, she allowed Taylor to pull her away to the back of the room.
"It's over, honey," Taylor said, grabbing both her hands. "Breathe in deep and get some air into your lungs."
Her chest ached. Every time she inhaled, her stomach revolted. There was so much blood. Kurt probably needed stitches. She groaned, closing her eyes. His hands weren't even fully healed from him busting his knuckles open on the wall in her bedroom.
"Look at me." Taylor shook Risa's shoulders and waited for her to lift her gaze. "He needs this, honey, as much as you need him. Fighting gives him the ability to feel, to love, to be normal. Without working through his aggression, he'll close himself off to you, his dad, his club, and me. You don't understand now, but you will if you suck it up and give him the chance to prove it. He's worth it, honey. He's worth the pain of watching. "
Tears spilled down her cheeks. She nodded, scrubbing at her face. Her heart broke for the young man who hurt inside for a mother that wasn't worth his anger. God, she understood the anger. She went to extremes stripping to mimic a mother she resented, only to fight harder at proving she could remain distant from the town, to other men, to friends.
She understood too well why Kurt fought. It was the only way he could prove he was worthy. The time in the ring meant he had total control. He wasn't cocky. He was just that good.
"I-I'm okay." Risa inhaled a shuddering breath. "I want to go see him."
Taylor kissed her cheek. "Thank you, honey. I knew yo
u were good for him."
She pulled back. "I didn't do anything."
"Yes, you did." Taylor brushed Risa's cheek of a stray tear. "You love my son."
Love?
She wasn't sure what it was that she was feeling. Maybe she did love him. Or, maybe she was obsessed and consumed by everything happening to her. Kurt came into her life, bossed her around, and never gave her the choice.
He was exactly what she needed to give herself permission to do something for herself. Selfish? Probably.
She navigated through the crowd and caught Kurt's eyes before she reached him. The light was back in his gaze, and her knees weakened at the concern and vulnerability looking back at her. He wanted acceptance.
She stepped in front of him, not knowing what to say. Therefore, she said the first thing that popped into her head.
"You look like shit," she said.
He kept looking at her, and the look wasn't the same one he wore in the ring. "It'll heal."
The questions he refused to ask her bothered her. She had him second-guessing his own desires, and for a man like Kurt, she knew how important her reaction would be for him. "I'm glad you won, my man."
The tension in his shoulders eased, and his Adam's apple moved along his throat. He nodded, tightening his mouth. She ran the flat of her hand down his chest.
"I don't know what I'm supposed to do." She moistened her lips. "Do you need a doctor or bandages?"
He cleared his throat and the corner of his mouth tilted up. "Shower."
"Okay." She glanced around. "And Ink?"
"A couple of the guys took him in the shower. He'll wake up when the water hits him." He leaned down. "You with me?"
"Yeah. I'm with you." She stretched and kissed his swollen lips. "Completely."
"I'm going to make it official, angel. I want everyone to know. You and me, one day at a time for a lifetime." Kurt hooked his finger into the front of her shorts and pulled her close. "Will you be my old lady?"
Her heart raced. He was asking for more than a day at a time. She couldn't understand why he'd want her. She wasn't done reinventing herself. "Kurt. I..."
"It's permanent, angel," he added. "You've got my heart and I want you to keep it."
What he asked was crazy. She looked at him, and the way he looked back gave her the answer. She wanted those eyes on her every day. His arms around her every night. His voice in her ear every hour.
Thinking about him not in her life made her desperate. Unbelievably, he fit into her messed up life and accepted her. She wanted to take care of him, keep him safe, and be there when his only option was to fight to get the anger out of his head. He'd become the most important person she'd ever had in her life, and there were no delusions. He thought she was worth the risk of being his old lady.
She nodded. "Yes."
"Angel...come here," he said, his voice hoarse.
She went to him, and he lowered his head and kissed her. Cheers broke them apart. She gazed around, surprised to find all the Bantorus members smiling at them.
"Get used to them. They're nosy and opinionate, and it'll get worse, because you're officially a Bantorus woman now." Kurt wrapped his arm around her.
She walked around the room in a daze. An old lady?
Taylor rushed over and hugged her, whispering in her ear, words she couldn't understand. Lightheaded and dreaming, she smiled in return. Each one of the women here had something she admired, a dedicated man, security in having a family, and acceptance. Energy attacked, and she curled into Kurt's side, hand to stomach, and head to chest.
Tucked against Kurt's hard body, his arm looped over her shoulders holding her close, and his heartbeat in her ear was the only place she wanted to be. This was her spot, and she wasn't leaving.
"You make me happy, angel." Kurt kissed her. "Let's walk everyone out. They all need to hit the road, and I want you back upstairs and between your legs."
As she helped the riders bring their rolls holding their bedding and clothes, Kurt took a shower and returned to her side for goodbyes. Together, they exchanged hugs with the other members and promised to come to Pitnam soon. She stood beside Kurt while Rain gave the order to roll out.
She waved until her arm tired and the last rider rode out of sight. "Your family is wonderful."
"Yeah." He turned her around and walked with her to the stairs. "They'll be back. The territory is expanding, and that means during the summer months, we'll be moving between Pitnam and Federal. Maybe we'll even get a week off later this summer, and I'll take you back home and show you around."
She paused on the steps. "I'll have to organize the girls, and see about having a couple of the bikers watch over them on the weekends. I'm usually there to make sure the miners treat them right. I could never leave them to handle Silver Girls by themselves."
"We'll figure it out." He continued climbing.
In front of them, the door flew open and Remmy stuck his head out. "Fire in town at the Sterling Building. Call came through a minute ago. I've called everyone out to ride."
"What?" She pressed a hand to her chest. "Is everyone okay?"
"Fuck." Kurt turned, grabbed Risa's hand, and forced her to pay attention to him. "Lock yourself in the club. I'll have Sawyer stay with you."
"No. The girls are there." She pushed at his chest. "Someone needs to call the fire department."
"I heard the call over the scanner. The emergency crew is in route." Remmy passed them, jumping on his bike.
Risa refused to let go of Kurt's hand. This was a nightmare. The building was in great shape for being a historical piece of architecture. How could it catch on fire?
"Come on then." Kurt held on to her hand, making sure she stayed close as they ran down the steps. "Have you ever ridden before?"
She shook her head. He sat on the bike, lifted her hand, and helped her on. "Get on, hold on, and don't let go. Don't fight the corners, and whatever you do, keep your leg away from the fucking muffler."
"Okay." She climbed clumsily onto the back of the bike and did exactly like he ordered.
He reached down and pulled out the foot pegs. "Plant your feet, and angel, watch the legs. You've got shorts on and I don't want you burnt."
"Okay," she said.
Too scared to worry about riding in shorts with no helmet, she buried her face in the back of Kurt's leather vest, and prayed that the girls were all right.
Chapter Nineteen
At the city limit, Kurt spotted black smoke billowing above the east side of town. He shifted gears and leaned into the corner, aware of Risa hugging his waist. This was not how he wanted to take Risa on her first ride.
Knowing the emergency crew and probably every cop was at the fire; he double checked the intersection and continued through the stop sign without stopping. Risa's hands slapped at his stomach, and he looked into the side mirror and found her staring up at the sky. He couldn't do a damn thing about the worry on her face until he arrived at the Sterling Building and learned what happened. He only hoped that the girls and Tim, Muff, and Crain were all right.
The phone in his pocket vibrated. He ignored the call and pulled onto Cedar Street.
"Jesus Christ..." he said at the sight ahead of him.
Flames jumped out of each window, fully engulfing the brick building. He slowed down and parked next to the curb, a block away. Police had the street blocked off and the two fire engines were battling the fire.
Sheriff Colby jogged toward him. Kurt reached back and helped Risa off, and then exited the bike. He held on to Risa's hand, keeping her back. Tears flowed down her face as she searched the crowd. There was nothing he could do to help her, until he knew what was going on.
"Tried calling," Sheriff Colby said, stopping in front of him. "When we got the call into 911, the place was already half consumed. The firemen are making sure it doesn't spread to the other buildings."
Kurt stepped around the sheriff.
"Hey, you need to stay back." The sheriff grabbed
the back of his vest.
Kurt swung around, knocking Sheriff Colby's hand off him. "Don't touch me. I'm going after my men and the girls."
The sheriff shook his head, his hand going to the butt of his pistol holstered at his side. "But you—"
"Back off." Kurt kept Risa at his side. "The only thing I want you to do is watch Risa. Do not let her near the fire. Do you understand me?"
Sheriff Colby's features tightened and he nodded, slipping his hand around Risa's upper arm. Risa pulled, but the sheriff kept her by his side.
"I need to find the girls." Risa reached for Kurt.
He walked backward. "I'll find them. Just stay there."
She nodded, thrusting her free hand in her hair. He turned and ran toward the building.
The firefighters, busy and distracted by the flames, ignored him. He searched the street, and was ready to find one of the firefighters to ask him to go inside the building, when he caught sight of Muff sitting on the back of the fire truck, bent over, hands cradling his head, coughing up a lung. He jogged over, and was relieved to find the others, including the girls.
"Is everyone out? Okay?" He took in his men, comforting the women, and counted heads to make sure everyone was safe.
"Yeah, we got out the back." Crain pressed Alana's face into his shoulder. "Shari hurt her ankle jumping out the second story window, but I don't think it's broken."
The other Bantorus men who rode over from the club ran up to the scene. Kurt pulled Remmy to the side before he could reach Alana. "Ask the girls what happened."
"On it, prez." Remmy hurried to Alana and knelt down in front of her.
Kurt turned away and stared up at the building. He clenched his teeth. The building was a total loss. By the time the firefighters put out the fire, the only thing standing would be the brick. He'd had everything upgraded, the furnace, the wiring, the inside building materials. The construction crews had double-checked their workmanship and the building code officer passed each job. There was no reason the building should've caught on fire.