by K. A. Linde
“You made me promise to keep my hands to myself,” Jack whispered, his breath hot on her lips. She could feel her body tense in anticipation. “Do you want me to stop?”
Lexi whimpered as his hand moved to the nape of her neck pushing up into her dark brown curls. She needed to tell him to stop. Her mind needed to clear, and not concentrate on the chills she found running down her spine at his touch. But her voice wasn’t working. She didn’t really want him to stop, and the effort of conjuring up those words seemed to be too much.
“Lex, look at me.” Her eyes fluttered open and she stared dreamily up at him. She wet her lips as she waited for him to continue. “I want to make it up to you, but I don’t want to cross a line. You’ll tell me if I am?”
Lexi thought about it for a second. She was having a hard time thinking when he was so close to her. His crystal clear baby blues seemingly staring straight through her. To be honest, she wasn’t sure how he was even controlling himself. Just a slight touch from him had sent her body into overdrive. Her pulse was racing, and her nipples were erect.
But could she let herself do this? Guilt creased her features for a brief second before he kissed her worries away. He had never kissed her like this before. The passion they had both been feeling overflowed as he parted her lips. His tongue licked across her bottom lip before moving in and meeting her tongue. She moaned as the kiss intensified. He pulled her into his lap and pressed their bodies firmly together, letting his hand rest on the inside of her bare thigh.
Almost as soon as the kiss began it ended. Lexi ended up straddled on top of him in her grey mini skirt. She could feel the course material of his jeans against her inner thighs, and felt his erection pressed against her barely-there, red, lace thong. She was panting as she stared at him from her precarious position.
“That didn’t cross the line?” Jack asked pressing one more kiss on her lips. She shook her head. Words still wouldn’t come. She just wanted more. Her eyes moved from his eyes eagerly back to his lips. She leaned in and gave him another, more demanding kiss. She could feel him smiling against her mouth.
“I’ll take that as a no.” Picking her up, he effortlessly flipped her over on her back so that he was situated on top of her. She adjusted her position so that her head rested comfortably on a pillow. This did nothing for her skirt, which rode up to the very tops of her thighs as she moved.
He seemed to ignore this fact as his hands crawled up her shirt and cupped her breasts through the red lace bra she had put on before coming over. His head moved toward her skin as he pulled down the bra, and grasped her nipple between his lips. She gasped at his forwardness, but didn’t disapprove. Actually, whatever he was doing with his mouth was working. Groaning, she wiggled her hips in appreciation. While his tongue began working on her other breast, his hand snaked underneath and unclasped the bra.
“And this,” he said flicking his tongue across her hard nipple, “isn’t crossing the line?” Her eyes snapped shut, back arching at the delicious feel of him. All thoughts of stopping had completely left her. She had come this far. She wasn’t sure if she could stop him even if she wanted to. And she didn’t want to.
“I don’t think you’ll need this,” he said, pulling her shirt over her head, and tossing it along with her bra to the floor.
She couldn’t believe herself. Here she was, all but nude, on Jack’s bed. Her practically see-through thong hardly covered anything, and her skirt seemed to be on just for show. It wasn’t really preventing anything.
“You know I think you look more beautiful now than I’ve ever seen you,” Jack said moving to kiss her on the lips.
She breathed him in. Everything about him turned her on. The way he had so easily riled her up; the way his lips and tongue had turned her to Jell-O. She couldn’t imagine what it would be like if he went farther. Her body liked that thought, and she could feel her thong begin to soak through. Really was there a point for her having it on? She couldn’t remember.
She hadn’t even realized that her hands were digging into his back until he pulled back to strip off his shirt. Her gaze fell on the perfectly toned abdomenal muscles. Instinct made her reach out and trail her fingers down his six-pack enjoying the feel of each solid muscle. He groaned as her hand reached his waistline. She ran her thumb underneath the hem of his jeans across the sensitive portion of skin.
Jack reached out and laced his hands in hers, then forced her back against the bed roughly pushing her hands above her head. “We’ll get there later,” he said, teasingly pushing his erection against her as he bent forward and kissed her ear. An even louder gasp escaped her lips. “This is about you. Me making things up to you.”
She closed her eyes again and lost herself in the feel of his hands running down her arms, across her breasts, along the line of her stomach, catching the curve of her buttocks, and then teasing her thighs with his fingertips. She let loose a moan as he unexpectedly nipped at the inside of her right leg, spreading it open wide.
“Jack,” she moaned as his mouth moved up her left thigh successfully spread-eagling her legs in front of his face.
“Yes, dear?” he asked his finger trailing the line of her thong.
“Oh, Jack,” she gasped feeling his finger get replaced by his tongue.
“Mmm hmm?” he asked his breath hot against her lace thong only increasing the wetness across the flimsy material. “Do you want me to keep going?”
She wasn’t sure if she could handle this any longer. God, she wanted him so bad. She had wanted him to do this for a year. The sexual build-up was killing her. She knew her body was already so close to release that if he so much as laid one finger in her she would be gone.
“Lex,” he moaned pressing his thumb gently against her clit.
“Yeah...yes...um...yes?” she asked, her body tightening at the feel of the pressure on such a sensitive area, even through her thong.
“You didn’t answer,” he said relieving the pressure briefly. “Do you want me to keep going?”
She wanted to say no, to push him away and run out of the house. Or at least, she knew that’s what she should want, but she didn’t. She wanted him to keep going and not to stop until she was spent. Lexi found herself nodding. Then realizing he couldn’t see her with his face buried in her crotch, she finally uttered, “Yes.”
“Yes?”
“Yes, I want you to keep going.”
“You’re sure?”
“God, please, touch me.”
Ever so slowly, he hooked his finger under the thong and began to massage her clit in a circular fashion. When she began to buck her hips against the immense amount of pressure, he removed her skirt and thong, and threw them to the floor. As soon as they left his hand, he dove down and began flicking his tongue against her clit in short, quick, back-and-forth motions. Her legs began to shake from the exertion of holding them open, and allowing him to have his way with her. Her body began to overflow with pleasure, as she got closer to climax. He rotated between licking and sucking motions enjoying the taste of her all over his mouth. His fingers appeared and slid between her lips opening her up fully to him. She pushed her hips up eager to meet his fingers that were positioned over her moist opening.
Instead of fingering her like she so desired, he ran his fingers across the wet sides of her lips hitting each sensitive nerve perfectly. Her back arched and she let loose a low moan, feeling her body reaching all new heights. He was drawing out her pleasure, knowing that each touch was sending her farther and farther over the edge. He was increasing her bliss by prolonging the time until her climax, waiting until he allowed her to orgasm. When he knew she couldn’t take it any longer, he inserted two of his fingers directly into her. He felt her instantly clench around him, causing his erection to harden even further in his jeans.
Lexi began laboriously panting as she felt her climax take over her body. Jack’s fingers were working in a come-hither motion on the inside of her sending her over the edge. She moaned even loude
r, only just resisting the urge to scream in delight.
Her legs were shaking convulsively by now as he removed his fingers and swiped at his mouth. “I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” he said leaning forward and kissing her. “And damn, do you taste good.”
She blushed at his words. Even after what had just happened, sexual references still made her blush. This made her giggle. She felt euphoric.
“Damn, Lex, you look cute like that.” He assessed her naked form. “You should always be naked around me.”
She blushed even deeper. “Come here,” she commanded snaking her arms around his neck and pulling him in for another kiss. “I want you,” she moaned against his lips.
“You want me?”
“Inside of me. Now.”
She didn’t have to say it twice. He quickly undid his belt and tugged his jeans to the ground. Lexi smiled sweetly at his blue boxers covered with tiny yellow fish. He tore those off as well and repositioned himself over her. It was his turn to pant while his erection hovered only inches above her soaking wet opening.
His crystal clear blue eyes bored into her, as he got ready to meet her. “Are you sure, Lex?” She could tell it was taking every ounce of self-control he had not to just shove himself right inside of her, taking her for his own. Every inch—yes, every inch—was hard-pressed and ready to go.
But was she sure? She hadn’t been sure the whole time. In fact, the only thing she had been sure of was having the most amazing orgasm she could ever imagine. She wanted him inside of her, but something was nagging at her. If she went ahead and slept with him right then and there, like her body was begging her to do, there would be no going back. Maybe if they stopped where they were, she would be able to recover from what happened, but not after sex. Sex was final.
“Lex, you’re killing me here. I want you. I just need to know if you are sure this is what you want.”
She sighed heavily, her hands coming to cover her face. “Oh Jack, it’s what I want.”
He sighed happily, and moved himself so that the tip just barely touched her. He then shifted his hips to rub it up against her gently. She moaned at the feel of him, and then pushed herself away.
“But I can’t,” she whispered, sitting up against the headboard.
She watched his face fall as he realized that she wasn’t going to go through with it. But he wasn’t going to pressure her. If she said no, then he was going to be okay with that.
He rolled over to the other side of the bed and lay back against the sheets. “I just want to make everything up to you. If you don’t want to go further, that’s okay,” he finally said, after his breath began to even out.
Lexi hopped off the bed and quickly began throwing on clothes. “Actually, I don’t think you should make it up to me.”
“What?” he asked, concern written on his face.
“Jack, I have a boyfriend. I can’t believe I just did that.” Guilt washed over her.
“But you said it was okay.”
“I know I did. You didn’t do anything wrong. You asked me if it was okay. I was wrong for not stopping you.”
“No, Lex, you weren’t wrong,” he sai,d joining her on the carpet and grabbing her hands in his.
“I was wrong. I can’t be around you, Jack.”
“This is something you want though.”
“Not while I’m with someone else,” she said, lifting her face to meet his. Tears were welling in her eyes and she quickly wiped them away. She was so ashamed of herself. “I just have to go.”
“Lexi, please, don’t run out like this,” he said, tugging on his boxers and jeans.
“I can’t be around you,” she yelled, hating herself for raising her voice when he had done nothing wrong.
She just wanted to crawl into a hole. She felt like such a creep. How could she go on? How could she live with herself? She had been so lost in the moment—in him—that she couldn’t even think straight. She couldn’t process that she was ruining her life by being there with him, by letting him touch and kiss her like that. No matter how wonderful it had been, the guilt she was feeling was so much worse.
“Don’t beat yourself up about this,” he whispered to her as she threw her purse onto her shoulder and moved toward the bedroom door. “I don’t want you walking out the door and never talking to me again.”
“Jack, what I feel for you...I can’t feel like this when I have someone else. I’m not supposed to be this person. I’m not supposed to do these things. You have to understand. You’re too much for me.”
“I can’t understand that. We’re right for each other.”
“But not right now,” she said, hollowly repeating his own words. Her brown eyes glanced up and met his. “Isn’t that right?”
“No,” he said, reaching out for her. “Right now is right.” She backed away not wanting to be touched by anyone, especially not him. All she needed was a scalding shower and a few nights of repentance. Thank God, Spencer wouldn’t be back for a couple days. Maybe by then he wouldn’t notice.
“No, Jack,” she murmured, shaking her head. “I’m sorry. I can’t be around you.”
“Lex, come on.”
“No,” she stated firmly. “I’ll miss you.” Her words came out weak.
“I don’t want to miss you again. I want to see you more. I want us to hang out. God, I want us to finish our movie.”
She shook her head adamantly. “I shouldn’t have come over. I knew this was going to happen. I’m such an idiot. I can’t resist you. Good-bye,” she said reaching out and giving him a fleeting kiss before yanking the door and rushing out of the room.
When she reached her car, she let the tears flow. She pulled out of his driveway nearly blinded by tears.
How had she thought that this could be some innocent night?
How could she lie to herself about what she was doing?
PRESENT
The coffee shop Bekah chose for them to finally have their conversation in was delightful. In some ways, it reminded her so much of the place where she and Jack had first met. It wasn’t well lit, and there were so many people milling around that it seemed damn near impossible that they were going to find a table. On the other hand, the establishment was huge. Unlike chain and small town coffee shops, this place had three stories and took up an entire corner of a building. Lexi never bought coffee at places like this. For her, it lost the cozy atmosphere with the size.
Meandering through the densely populated shop, they went on a search for an unoccupied table. Lexi veered away from Bekah hoping to spot an available table in the opposite direction.
Jack had dropped her off outside the coffee shop after brunch. He had complained the whole way back about having to wear a tie, and had ditched her as soon as they arrived. He claimed he would be gone only as long as it took for him to change. She was pretty pissed that he had left. After all, he was the whole reason for this stupid conversation.
She didn’t know if it made it easier or harder knowing that Jack wouldn’t be hearing everything she said. On the one hand, she would be able to speak more freely about their relationship, because she wouldn’t feel constrained by his memories. But at the same time, she might be more convincing if Jack was there to back her up.
“Lexi?” a voice called out to her.
She turned in a half-circle hoping to find Bekah finally seated at a booth. She just wanted to get this over with. But Bekah was nowhere to be found. She heard her name called again, and this time she recognized the direction of the voice. Turning slowly, she stopped and gawked at the person who had called out to her.
“Oh my God! Krista is that you?” Lexi asked, rushing to hug the petite girl who had once been her gymnastics captain in college. “I hardly recognized you.”
“Yeah, I get that a lot,” she peeped, standing to accept the embrace.
“Your hair…it’s all one color…brown,” Lexi exclaimed in awe. “And who would have guessed anyone would ever find you in a business suit!”
>
“Not in a million years,” she said, adjusting her silky V-neck blouse to reveal a bit more cleavage.
“I thought you were in Vegas. When did you move back to Atlanta?” Lexi asked enthusiastically.
Krista giggled. The girl actually giggled holding out her left hand to reveal a huge diamond surrounded by four others on a white gold band.
“Oh wow, that’s beautiful.” Lexi stared transfixed at her ring. The rock was enormous. Lexi didn’t believe anyone actually wore diamonds that large out and about, but Krista always liked to catch people by surprise.
“I got married last winter. My husband’s company has an Atlanta branch. He knew how much I loved it out here so he relocated. I’m working with an interior design company. It’s kind of dull but the hours are flexible. If they weren’t, I’d quit that shit and go fulltime at the gym. We’ve got some amazingly talented girls. Last year, we had one make it almost all the way through the Olympic trials,” she explained.
“That’s amazing!” Lexi exclaimed truly happy for her friend.
“So, what are you doing here, missy? I’d heard through the grapevine that you were in fucking New York City,” Krista said, her green eyes glimmering.
“Yeah, I am. I’m just here visiting a friend.” Lexi paused, remembering that Krista and Jack knew each other. “Actually, I’m visiting Jack. Uh…Jack Howard.”
“Holy shit! Jack fucking Howard. Now that’s a name I haven’t heard in awhile. I thought you two would be married by now. Run off together or something,” Krista noted.
Lexi blushed. “Um…no.”
“Damn. You always seemed like a perfect pair to me,” Krista told her. She watched as Lexi’s complexion colored even further. “So where is he?” she asked, her head swiveling hoping to catch a glimpse of him. “He’s so delicious. I’d love to see him again.”
Lexi laughed remembering why she had always liked Krista. She was so straightforward and vulgar. It was refreshing. “He actually just dropped me off. I’m here with his…” Lexi trailed off, realizing that she had been standing here for a while and had completely lost Bekah.