by K. A. Linde
“Maybe I’ll see you soon,” Jack said.
It was the first optimistic thing he had said since she had arrived.
“Sounds good,” she said and then turned to go.
“Lexi, what’s that?” Jack asked, sounding shocked.
“What is, what?” She crinkled her eyebrows together.
Jack stalked forward, closing the short distance between them, and grabbed her left hand. “This. What is this?”
Lexi’s mouth went dry. No. He wasn’t supposed to find out this way. He couldn’t know now, not when he was so beat-up already.
She shook her head, not able to form the words.
“Lex, tell me,” he demanded, his eyes like ice as they stared into her.
She just shook her head more furiously. “I can’t.”
His grip on her hand tightened imperceptibly, and she winced. When she tensed, he dropped her hand like she had burned him.
“When were you going to tell me?”
“Soon,” she whispered. “Every time I wanted to, I couldn’t. The divorce—”
“Every time?” he asked, raising his eyebrows. “How long have you been…how long ago did this happen?”
He couldn’t even say it. She couldn’t either.
“About a month.”
Jack staggered back a step. His face was a mask, and if she hadn’t known him so well, she wouldn’t have seen the hurt flashing in his blue eyes.
“A month…”
“I’m sorry, Jack.”
“That you’re…” He shook his head. “Or that I found out this way?”
She took a breath before answering. “That you found out this way.”
“You always were a fucking terrible liar, Lex.”
Tears sprang to her eyes, and she shook her head. She hated hurting him. After all the fucking bullshit they had gone through, she still fucking hated this so fucking much. It made her chest ache, and her ears were ringing.
“I’m not lying,” she said. She had to stand by it. She loved Ramsey. She wanted to marry him.
“You can’t even say it. You haven’t even told me. I’ve known you for years, longer than everyone else you still talk to. I know you, Lex,” he said, still standing at his safe distance. “Don’t ever forget that I know who you are as much as you know who I am.”
“I know. God, I know, okay?” She swiped at her eyes as her vision got blurry.
“Are you happy?”
“Yes.”
“No, are you really, really happy? Like, you’ll never really be sad again because you have everything you want. Are you happy like that, Lex?” he asked.
Those blue eyes stared straight through her. They demanded she think and feel and remember.
She hesitated. “Yes.”
He shook his head and looked away from her. “Then, what are you doing here?”
“What?”
“If it’s him, Lex, and you’re really happy, then what are you doing here?”
“Don’t ask me stupid questions. I came because you asked me to,” she whispered.
He smirked at her. It was a knowing look. She had seen it a million times. How he managed it through the pain that was clear across his entire face at this point was beyond her.
“Exactly.”
Lexi just stared at him. How was she supposed to respond to that?
“And it’s why you should leave now because I’m asking you to.”
“Jack…”
“I told you once that all I wanted was for you to be happy. If you are, then that’s all that matters. That’s it,” Jack said before turning and walking back into the courtroom.
Lexi stood there, stock-still, for longer than she wanted to admit.
What had just happened?
APRIL—ONE YEAR AND SIX MONTHS EARLIER
Lexi might as well have been in a nightmare.
She stood at the center of a large group of people. Photographers were all around. A podium had been constructed off to the side. A shovel sat in the freshly tilled earth, and before her was the completely cleared land where the new Bridges medical wing was going to sit. Even though breaking ground had officially begun two months ago with the underground garage that was going in, they were having the public ceremony on this perfect sunny Saturday morning in front of the press.
The press made Lexi nervous.
They made her even more nervous when three guys who she had slept with were in close proximity. Not to mention, Bekah and Parker and Ramsey’s parents were also present!
She had never been with all of them in one place. Last year, the rehearsal dinner and wedding had been close, but John hadn’t been factored into the equation. Now, he was here, standing smugly next to Jessica. When he caught Lexi’s eye, he stared at her like he knew all of her secrets. It was completely disconcerting. She had never found out where he was getting his information from, but damn it, he seemed to know so much about her every time she saw him. He was civil and hadn’t pushed his luck with her or anything, but he was never far out of the loop.
And she just wanted to know—how?
But he wouldn’t tell her.
She couldn’t badger him about it without raising questions as to why she would be talking to him so much. So, she tried to avoid it. But she would be lying if she said the temptation to gather as much information from him as possible wasn’t there.
Lexi averted her attention from John as he started up a conversation with Jessica. Lexi surveyed the rest of the crowd. Bekah wasn’t even standing with Jack. He was talking to some business associates that Lexi had never seen before. Bekah was at her father’s right side, a position of power. Even though Bekah wasn’t working on the medical wing, she was sure to put herself in the spotlight, regarding the development.
Everyone was dressed in suits, and for a brief moment, she mourned the loss of Jack’s Chuck Taylors. She hadn’t seen him in them since the day of the concert. That could also be because she hadn’t seen him outside of work.
Something had shifted that night after the concert. Lexi hadn’t known what to say to Stella after her announcement. Jack had said no. Stella had pushed her luck. Still, they had slept together. But Lexi didn’t know why Jack had never given her the details. She remembered her interaction with Jack in New York clear as day. He had said that he didn’t have an excuse, it was his fault, and that he had to tell her…get it out in the open. Why would he say that when in reality he’d had an excuse?
It wasn’t that he had lied about it.
She probably would have still been pissed that he had gone through with it. But some part of her brain kept whispering that maybe things could have been salvaged.
Yet, she hadn’t been able to bring it up with him.
She just couldn’t do it.
She had walked out of that restroom and stared into those big blue eyes with a wave of memories crashing down all around her—the way he had looked at her on the beach, the first time he had told her loved her, the whispered sweet-nothings before falling asleep together, the depth of emotion in his eyes when he had produced that ring in her ratty New York apartment. She had seen all of that and thousands and thousands more moments all in a second. She had seen her Jack standing before her, wanting to do nothing more than to make her happy, when all he’d had to do was make an excuse for his behavior.
But he’d never had.
He had never once made an excuse for who he was.
He was just Jack—the blue-eyed, smirking, beautiful man she had loved for far too long.
Something had clicked in that moment. She wasn’t mad at him anymore.
She’d had every reason to be mad at him. He had fucked her over ten-thousandfold over the years. She’d had her heart ripped out of her chest more times than she could count. He had slept with someone else when they had finally had a shot at working it out. He’d had sex with Lexi before proposing to Bekah. He had put a duplicate of her ring on the Bitch’s finger. And then, he had fucking married the Bitch.
&n
bsp; And still, she couldn’t be angry with him even when she wanted to be. So, she had let it go. Because the only way that she could keep going was to move on.
As his blue eyes found her in the crowd, she knew that there would forever be a pull between them—a magnetic, inexplicable pull. If she kept fighting it, then she would only be putting all of her energy into pushing something away that kept crashing into her life and not focusing on the life she was currently living.
So, she lived her life with Ramsey. Jack just happened to be there—not like he had always been but more like…a friend.
“Lexi,” Ramsey whispered.
He stood at her side, and she hadn’t even realized he had been talking to her.
“What? Sorry,” she said, turning back to Ramsey.
He chuckled and squeezed her hand. “You look a little pale.”
“Press,” she murmured softly.
“Don’t worry. They’re just here to take pictures and maybe ask a few questions. You won’t even have to be around them.”
“That’s good.”
“We’re about to start,” he said before bending down and kissing her cheek. “I’ll find you after.”
“Okay. Good luck.”
“I don’t need it,” he said with a confident smile.
“I know. Take it anyway.”
“From you…I’ll take anything,” he whispered.
She believed him.
Ramsey left her side and walked up to the podium, followed close by his father and Parker. His father did some quick opening remarks, thanking everyone for being in attendance. Then, Ramsey gave a speech on the progress of the project, the vision behind the development, and the future of Bridges Enterprise.
Parker chimed in with perfectly timed delivery of her lines. She looked a bit nervous up there in front of all those people. She had clearly taken the time to put herself together though. Lexi normally thought that Parker had a bit of a thrown-together appearance, like she didn’t care about much more than the next surgery ahead of her. Someone must have convinced her otherwise today because she looked great—even Lexi could admit that. Parker’s dark brown hair was blown out, and she had on shimmery makeup that brought color to her naturally pale skin. She was wearing a fine-cut coral dress and nude heels—both designer if Lexi had to guess.
Ramsey’s suit was black, but his shirt and tie complemented what Parker was wearing. They looked good up there. Lexi’s heart constricted at the thought, and she wished to her very core that she could unthink it. Someone had dressed them. It hadn’t been an accident. It absolutely had not been an accident—not when they were going to be on TV and in pictures and going to be broadcast.
Fuck.
She turned away from the speech because, truthfully, she didn’t want to get choked up in front of anyone, especially not the people here. Thankfully, no one was looking at her. Everyone was trained on Ramsey and Parker talking about what they had created together.
She wished these kinds of things would hit her at more opportune moments. She had been trying not to care about the fact that Ramsey and Parker were working together. To begin with, Ramsey had only given in to the idea because of Lexi. Of course, if he had asked her, she would have told him not to even consider the idea. How ridiculous was it that she preferred him around strippers and club whores all day than to being near Parker?
But Ramsey wasn’t in love with Parker anymore. At least, there was that. They were just friends…coworkers. Lexi could get through that.
Schooling her features, she turned back toward the stage and stared up at her handsome boyfriend. He was the only one looking at her. He was speaking to the crowd, but he was looking directly at her. She wondered if he knew what she was thinking, what emotions were roiling through her chest.
By the look on his face, he had a pretty good idea. She wasn’t very good at masking her emotions, holding back, not reacting. She couldn’t lie well with her body any more than with her words.
The speeches ended to a round of applause. Lexi forced herself to clap along with the crowd as the Ramsey, his father, and Parker stepped down from the podium and walked over to the ornate shovel. A series of pictures were taken with each of them scooping a bit of dirt into the hole. Lexi didn’t see the point since construction was already well underway, but it was a press release, and she didn’t get anything about that. The press took a few more shots of them all together and then split them apart for interviews. Ramsey and Parker turned to speak with one reporter, and Lexi just stared.
She felt the presence behind her before he spoke.
“You all right?” Jack asked.
“What do you mean?” She kept her voice light and airy. She wasn’t sure why she was even trying to fool Jack. It was pretty useless.
“So, no?”
She sighed. “I’m all right. Don’t worry about me.”
“You looked pretty sad for a minute during that speech.”
“You weren’t even looking at me,” she said. She didn’t even know why she was defending herself like this.
Jack smirked at her, and those blue eyes lit up. “I could feel your panic a mile off, Lex. I only needed a peripheral look to know what you were feeling.”
Lexi just shrugged. If he knew, then she wasn’t going to explain herself. There were too many eyes and ears around at the moment. For all she knew, Bekah was going to barge over and confront her any second—except Lexi knew that probably wouldn’t happen. Bekah cared for her reputation more than anything else, and she wouldn’t risk losing her sugary-sweet persona in front of the press and a long list of prestigious Bridges associates.
“What do you think of all this?” Lexi asked, gesturing to their surroundings.
“Pretty lame party if you ask me.”
Lexi giggled and shook her head. “No, the medical wing.”
“Ah. I’ll probably still go to Grady,” he said with a shrug.
Lexi crinkled her nose. Grady Memorial was not a well-liked hospital in Atlanta, known primarily for being in a bad part of town and being good at saving gunshot victims. She had been there most recently when her father had had a heart attack. She didn’t really ever want to go back again.
“Only if you have a bullet wound. I’m pretty sure you’d die from anything else there.”
“Right. Forgot about that,” he said, shooting her a smile. “What do you think about it all?”
Lexi opened her mouth to tell him, but she didn’t know what to say. On the surface, it was brilliant. A full-service medical facility would help put a more positive spin on the Bridges brand. It would make them look compassionate, like they were providing a benefit to the community. It added another layer to their motto, Bridge the distance between you and your troubles.
Yet, she had a terrible feeling about it. She was sure it had something to do with who was standing right before her eyes and a whole hell of a lot less to do with the actual medical wing.
Ramsey and Parker were standing side by side, facing the reporter. Both seemed relaxed and comfortable with what was going on. Lexi wasn’t that far away, so she could pick out what they were saying if she concentrated. They were just doing some introductions, and she could tell the reporter was trying to keep them relaxed even though he didn’t really need to. Ramsey was never uncomfortable, and Parker seemed at ease by his side.
“We should probably find something else to occupy your mind,” Jack whispered.
“What?”
“You’re staring.”
“I’m his girlfriend,” she said, breaking her attention and looking back up at Jack. “I’m allowed to stare.”
“They’re not together, Lexi.”
Lexi’s brow furrowed at Jack’s words. “I know!”
“Just thought you needed the reminder.”
“Well, I don’t.”
Jack touched her elbow softly when she turned away from him to stare at Ramsey again.
“Ramsey’s not stupid. He won’t fuck up, Lexi,” Jack said. “Trus
t me…he told me.”
Lexi’s mouth went dry. Instead of reacting, she closed off. She couldn’t hear that. It made her insane, like she literally wanted to hurt someone…primarily Bekah but just because she was a bitch. Lexi should like the fact that Ramsey had said he was never going to fuck up, but the audacity irritated her. He had already fucked up. He had fucking lied to her over and over and over again. He had built their relationship on a foundation of lies, and the worst one was currently standing at his side, giving an interview with him.
“This is a huge achievement for the two of you and at such a young age. What was the catalyst that triggered the decision to open a new hospital in the Atlanta area?” the reporter asked Ramsey and Parker.
Lexi listened from a distance.
“It’s something we’ve always talked about doing,” Ramsey said, “but after Parker graduated from medical school and started working as a surgeon, we knew that there would be no better time.”
Wait, wait, wait—Parker was the catalyst behind this endeavor? That was the story they were going with? Of course, in the back of her mind, Lexi knew that it was a better story to sell to the press. But the rest of her wanted to stomp right over there and give them the real story.
Lexi’s eyes narrowed as Ramsey placed his hand on the small of Parker’s back.
“She’s the mastermind behind the project. It’s all her.” Ramsey didn’t move his hand.
It was just for the press. It was just for the press. It was just for the press.
“Uh…maybe we should take a walk,” Jack said, grabbing her elbow.
“Did you fucking hear that?” she blurted out.
“Yeah. It might be best for you to walk off the steam blowing out of your ears right now,” he said.
“Fine,” she grumbled, still glaring at Ramsey as he easily chatted with the reporter.
She had stopped listening. It clearly wasn’t healthy for her to do so.
They turned together, Jack leading her farther away from Ramsey and Parker. He was right. She needed to get away from that. It was just a show, and really, it didn’t matter. Just a dumb ceremony—that was all.