by N X Hunter
"No. It's not like that. Yeah, I'm more likely to be attracted to mahou shoujo than regular women, but I do still have a taste of my own. It's like a guy who says he prefers blondes - he doesn't just turn into a horny mess every time he sees a girl with blonde hair. Actually, of the mahou shoujo I've worked closely with since I came to the Academy, you are the first that has had this effect on me. The others, I met them when they were too young, and by the time they were grown women I just didn't see them that way. You, though, it's almost all I see. And I feel like you're hurting so much, and I could help you, and I just want you to let me..."
His face was so close to hers that she felt an almost magnetic pull driving her to kiss him. It would be so good to feel his lips on hers, his hands on her body. But she knew that if she did that she wouldn't be able to stop. She'd have to have him right here, and that would surely change everything.
"I can't be... yours. I don't know what my life is going to be like at Calibre Academy yet, at all. It would be wrong of me to promise you anything..."
His hand was on her face again, his fingers gently stroking her cheek, a kind longing on his face.
"I know that. I am not asking for that. I know I won't be the only one who is drawn to you here, and... I know I'm already not the only one you could be with. But there are so many pressures on you already, on all mahou shoujo. Those of us who are compelled to fall for girls like you, well, we grow to learn that the worst thing we can do for your happiness is try and force you to make even more tough choices, or to go against what you want. There's enough of that in your lives. If you let me offer you some of the love you need, that's enough for me. And... I expect Soren will feel the same way."
Kitsuna felt a blissful smile spread over her face. Hearing him take away her worries, at least about this one part of her situation, was like feeling the sun on her face. Could he really have understood what she had meant so perfectly? Was he really telling her she could be free, if only in that one way?
"Was it obvious I like him?"
"Almost as obvious as that he likes you too. But it's OK - I know him pretty well. We may not be best friends, but, we do respect each other and I think we're both used to the peculiarities of the mahou shoujo world enough to agree that what is important is you and what you need, not some pissing contest over who can say you are only his."
Is this really true? Is there really no reason not to let him in?
She reached up slowly with both of her hands, ready to bring his face down to hers, to kiss him for the first time there on the floor of the silent room. To give in to the urges she'd been feeling ever so strongly since she'd awoken here with the long talk over and the time for getting some comfort and release now here. She didn't know if they'd end up fucking, or if there would be a slower build up to that, but she wanted it, she wanted him.
"Oh fuck!" he shouted in horror, grabbing her left arm just before she could make her move.
Kitsuna's state of entranced desire shattered as she saw what had caused his reaction.
The pulsing glow of indigo inside the jewel at her wrist.
Chapter 11
"No! How can it be possible? The last storm was only last night! And wouldn't Rayna or Soren have called us?"
Kitsuna's shock and fear had completely broken her out of the hazy, clouded feeling of having just come around from fainting, and it had also totally ruined the mood. She felt strange being in James' arms now. How could she have been considering making out with a hot professor when at any moment, the monsters she was so woefully underprepared to fight could appear...
She realized with that thought that actually, nobody had really told her what happened during a storm at all. Had they thought there would be plenty of time for that? She tried to remember how frequently there had been storms when they were just - to her at least - normal weather events, but even the memories of them freaking her out weren't enough to get a sense of time. She'd become so used to being afraid of them that she could remember specific occasions of panicking when it had been an inconvenience, but not really of how regularly it had occurred.
I guess I could look at stats for that somewhere... Why isn't there more time for me to feel prepared?
"I don't know about why it has come so soon, though I can tell you why Rayna didn't call - this room. It is insulated against, well, all kinds of stuff, but that also means we can't get any reception for phones and other digital signals in here. This is the only room on campus with no computers or anything much electronic - there are strange fields required that have the unwanted additional effect of making most of our tech useless."
"Well, then, how does my Talizman still work?"
"Because it's not a real Talizman. Those things are magic - they were invented here at the academy. Everyone connected with mahou shoujo has one, and so that's why your mom gave you yours. They look just like the various Talizman trinkets, which is not a coincidence, actually - the Talizman company is run by someone who used to work here, son of a mahou shoujo. He invented technological wearables that look similar to the warning beads we use, and made a fortune, while also making people wearing ours completely hidden in plain sight... So, yeah, that was a fun history lesson for you, I'm sure, but we need to think about what to do now."
"When my Talizman - I mean, my warning bead thingy - when it is pulsing faintly like this there is usually a lot of time left, when all I have to do is get to somewhere covered with other people. It sure doesn't feel like 'a lot of time' in this context, but doesn't that still mean the storm isn't about to happen right now? Should I try and get back to Rayna before it hits?"
James shook his head.
"I don't think getting home should be the priority. We need to get you up to speed on what is about to happen, and while that would be easier with Rayna, by the time you've got there by Volocopter some of the little time we have will have been wasted. I'll brief you here instead. Obviously I have never been inside a storm domain but I know what I'm talking about."
"Well, can't we just leave this room and call Rayna from out there in the hallway, maybe get her to come here?"
"We could, but there is a risk associated with leaving this room. You see, this room's insulation means it is blocked off from the magical reality that the storm domain will occupy. It is possible that the storm is closer than we think, and the Talizman or whatever you want to call it is showing a weaker warning just because we're inside the fields here."
"I don't follow."
"It means that there's a chance, albeit a slight one, that if we leave the room, you will simply enter the storm domain."
"And what about you? What happens to everybody else? I'm really not getting what a storm domain is..."
"A storm domain is a separate reality that is caused by the advance of the creatures from the Big Emptiness, or at least, that's what we think it is. Those things, we know so little about them. We don't really know anything about where they come from either. We took to calling it the Big Emptiness centuries ago, but it isn't because it is a literal big empty space, but because we don't know what it is at all. Big and empty seemed like good words to describe something so vague and incomprehensible. Even after thousands and thousands of battles between humans and these things, we can only loosely even describe them. But they want to come into our reality, that much seems to be the case, and when whatever conditions are met on their end, they start to mess with our world. That creates the tangible effects in our world of a very short flash storm, over almost as soon as it starts. But the thing is, that's just a side effect that humans can see. Really, when they attack, it is outside of our space and time. You could be in a storm domain for what feels like days, and yet, were it possible to look out from there at me, here, you'd see me frozen in time."
"But if that's the case, can't I just... Stay in this room and skip the whole thing?" she said, though she promptly realized how cowardly that sounded, "I'm not going back on what I said about wanting to take this seriously now. I know I'll ha
ve to go, sometime anyway, but you have to agree I'm not ready. Wouldn't it be acceptable for me to just wait it out in here with you?"
"It's not ideal, you're definitely right there. But it's completely forbidden for this room to be used that way. Don't you think that if it wasn't, every time a mahou shoujo didn't feel like fighting, she'd come here? In your case it's not an unreasonable thing to suggest, but without that rule we'd have people ditching on their duties all the time for far less rational reasons. Even just knowing it was there as an option would mess with people's heads, and make each individual storm feel like it was a choice."
"But, like you say, it is reasonable for me today, surely whoever is in charge would understand..."
"Trust me, what happens to people who commit infractions is far worse than a slap on the wrists, or even me losing my job. The Calibre Academy doesn't fire people - that would leave all their disgruntled former employees out there in the world with all of their secrets. Secrets that are far too important to the continued functioning of civilization itself to be leaked. There's a life sentence in a very bad place for both of us if they decide they don't agree with our choice here."
"Shit..."
"Yup. So, our hands are tied. You are going into this storm, that we can't change. You and Rayna, and Courtney, who she'll have probably met up with before going in, will also have to find each other inside the domain, which shouldn't be too hard, unless it's a huge one, given you'll be the only people in it. But it is also like playing your first run on hard mode. But, and, I know this is gonna sound like a really out of place, arrogant thing to bring up but it's important... Did what almost happened there, with us, did it make you feel wanted?"
Kitsuna thought for a moment. It was obvious why he was asking - he was hoping just his words and his intentions had been enough to make her feel less alone in the world, to feel some form of love, even if, at this point in their relationship, it could only be that desire version of love. Desire was good enough.
She did feel some boost to her confidence as a result of him confessing how attracted he was to her. It had felt good, the moment they'd had, when he'd offered her what she'd needed and expected no commitment or promise from her in return. Being touched by him, that had made her feel comforted. She had wanted him badly, though only fleetingly because the chance had been ruined, but really, that emotion just felt like it was being put on hold. She felt that being with him was a wonderful inevitability now, something to look forward to. Something to get her through this.
"Yes," she said decisively.
"Well that's something we've got on our side. Also, you'll transform automatically when you enter the storm domain, so any weakness you feel from the mental toll of changing and changing back in the normal world will go away when you do."
"So what can you tell me now, before you make me go out there?" she asked, looking at the door of the insulated room as if it were a closet full of monsters.
"You'll transform, that much is true, and you should see what type of weapon you will have. We can't expect too much of an improvement in your transformation yet, we... didn't have enough time to achieve that... but you should be a little stronger than you were before, and you should have a basic version of a weapon, which you will be able to operate. For some reason the weapons only appear inside the storm domains, so we can't even guess at what you'll get from your controlled transformation. I've never even seen Rayna or Courtney's weapons, because of that, but I know Rayna has a sword, which she is extremely proud of and which is apparently very beautiful, and Courtney has a spear. Both of them are very powerful due to the girls' veteran status, so don't be disappointed if your weapon looks quite plain and doesn't come with a load of magic abilities - it will grow as you do."
"What kind of weapons are possibilities?"
"There seems to be no real rationale behind how the weapons are matched to people. Some are bladed weapons like swords and machetes, some are things like bows and crossbows, and others are more unusual like whips, nunchuks and throwing stars. They all seem to have real world equivalents from some point in history though, so they seem to represent human inventions. Your abilities when you transform will allow you to intuitively fight with your weapon and use any magical capabilities that it has, in any case, so it shouldn't matter individually what you get - you'll be a pro with it instantly. Knowing more about it may help you come up with strategies with your team mates, though. For instance, if you have a bow, that could compliment Rayna and Courtney's close range weapons in helpful ways."
Kitsuna nodded mutely. She had never imagined herself picking up a weapon at all before, so she hadn't thought much about what she'd be well suited to, though it seemed it didn't matter. Whatever power was behind the existence of mahou shoujo would make sure she and her weapon worked well together. She wondered what that was going to feel like, and was almost excited, somewhere deep inside herself, to imagine leaping around competently, taking out enemies with flashy sword moves, or sending arrows through the air from a beautiful, ornate bow. Under other circumstances it would be pretty cool, like, if there weren't these weird monsters that were going to be trying to kill her.
"James, answer me honestly, how likely am I to die? I'm weak, I don't know where my team mates are, and I have no idea what these creatures are all about... I... How many girls make it out of their first storm alive? When the odds are this stacked against them?"
She couldn't really believe she was saying these words, asking a man she had been about to get intimate with whether she'd even be likely to live to see him again. She didn't want to face it, but she had to - she was out of time, and it was better, or, at least, she thought it might be better, to know just how dangerous this was going to be.
James held her tightly, she could feel his strength around her, the only thing that was solid in her world at that moment.
"I know it sounds like you're risking death, but actually, mahou shoujo are not killed inside the storm domains very often at all. The healing factor, and the overpowered fighting abilities granted by the transformations are the world's way of protecting itself. Also, the things from the Big Emptiness don't even seem especially interested in killing mahou shoujo, at least, not in physical combat. We don't really know what they want, but they try and get out of their domains and into our world, using whatever means it is mahou shoujo are able to enter the domain. We don't even know what they want here, but we do know the effects they can have on people's minds, and reality itself. It seems less that they want to destroy humans or see us as enemies, as that they are just a very different, alien force of nature that is incompatible with our own. They will try and wear down mahou shoujo mentally, which, yes, can involve hurting them physically, among other things, but it is extremely rare for them to be able to directly kill someone with instant healing and advanced, magical fighting powers."
That almost made her feel braver, until she noticed something about his choice of words.
"You say they don't kill us very often directly. That they wear us down mentally. What does that mean?"
"Yes, it seems like you understood my meaning there. The real risks when dealing with these things are less on the physical side, more in terms of your sanity. They can cause people to fall into total despair if they haven't got the --"
"Love. I get it. Well, I do feel a bit better knowing that it's mental resilience rather than physical that I'm going to need."
Kitsuna did feel like that would be less scary. She'd been through grief, she'd been through loneliness, she had even been through whatever this was, now, finding out her past had been full of secrets and her future was no longer hers to decide upon. She'd felt anger, fear, betrayal, injustice, all of that, just in the last 24 hours, but she hadn't lost her mind. She could rely on herself for this, to keep herself strong and closed off against whatever tricks or mental attacks these things might have. It was far better than them trying to eat her or cut her in half, anyway.
James's expression was hard to
read, as he gently touched her cheek again, just as he had done when she had been about to kiss him.
"Just remember that you need to come back to me. Any damage they do to your state of mind, I'll try my best to make it better as soon as you're back here in my world. But keep that single goal in mind - getting out of there and back to the people who want you."
"How do I get back?"
"Every storm domain has a kind of core that stabilizes it. The things from the Big Emptiness will try to guard it, and also try to somehow find a way to break out of their domain and into ours. When that core is destroyed, their domain collapses and you'll be back in the real world, pretty much exactly where you left. Ironically, mahou shoujo, who before their awakening rush to not be alone during storms, need to make sure they are somewhere safe when a storm starts so that normal people won't see them - because to a bystander it may look like you glitch out of existence and back in. You'll be fine though, anywhere on the Calibre Academy campus."
"So I need to find Rayna and Courtney, and then we fight our way to this core thing and destroy it? OK. That sounds... I can't believe I'm saying this, but... doable."
"It will be. Just keep thinking about what you want to get back to. Don't lose yourself in there. I'll take care of you after that, I promise. Now, look, I'm so, so sorry this has all been so fast, but... You should go."
He took hold of her hand gently and raised it up in front of both of their faces. The meaning was clear. The bead was dark now.