by Andy Lewter
The same emotion. Whatever it was that I was feeling, he felt the exact same way. With our feelings combined — the same feeling — it was an undeniable connection.
"I never thought this was possible," he whispered after a moment.
"Can you… feel that?" I asked him, my breath ragged. Keeping control was easier for me now that I knew what to expect. I could see, feel and hear his emotion. I could see it radiating from every inch of his body.
"Yes," he said, his deep voice cracking.
I had every detail of his gorgeous copper eyes burned into my memory. The intensity of what we were feeling together was overwhelming. An emotion so strong I couldn't imagine anything could altar it. It wasn't until I saw brilliantly bright colors reflecting off his skin that I realized the sun was setting. I hesitated, but broke eye contact anyway — and the breath rushed out of my lungs.
It was the most beautiful sunset I had ever seen. Bright orange and pink molded to the clouds' crevices that were once dark and dreary. Rays of golden, orange sunlight poked through the now purplish clouds as the sun was sinking beneath the horizon. There were birds singing in a near-by tree. The moment seemed to belong in a fairy-tale.
I looked back at Nicholas, noticing he never once took his eyes off me. He shook his head slowly and brought his hand up, cupping my face.
"No sunset, no sunrise, not one infinitely long rainbow could ever compare to how beautiful you are." His touch was warm and magnetic. I reached up and ran my fingers though his silky dark hair and was surprised to feel the electricity burn through my fingers as well. It felt like all the wonderful things in the world put in one small touch. It took my breath away.
He stood and reached for my hand, gently pulling me up. He slowly placed his hand on the small of my back, pressing me close against him. His other hand trailed ever so slightly down my arm, raising goosebumps on my skin where he touched. Once he reached my hand, he pulled it up and draped it around his neck, and then pulled up the other. He placed his lips lightly against my forehead and started dancing with me tight in his arms, ever so slowly.
He gently lifted my chin with his forefinger to look into my eyes. His hooded, copper eyes were bright.
His lips barely brushed my cheek, which made the electric feeling burn against them. Then he kissed me softly — his soft lips molded perfectly to mine. I felt alive for the first time. No — more than that. It felt as if I'd never known that half of me was missing until this moment. I felt whole, and he was the puzzle piece missing in my life.
He trailed soft kisses on the corners of my mouth, down my jaw line and finally placed a sweet, lingering kiss on my collarbone. He cupped my chin and pressed my forehead against his while taking in a deep, ragged breath. "You are so beautiful…"
"When will I see you again?"
"That is nothing you need to worry about now," he said.
I smiled.
Suddenly, headlights and the crunching sound of gravel alerted us both to look up. My mom must be back from her shopping trip.
"I hope you don't mind meeting my mom — because she just pulled up." I said grimly, peeking up at his expression. She was going to be shocked when she saw him. I was the last person she would expect to have a guy over while she was gone.
This was the kind of thing Liv would pull — not me.
He smiled and pulled away from me, cracking his knuckles as if he were about to meet a tough challenge. "Hook, line and sinker. Let's do this."
"Did you seriously just say what I think you did?" He didn't answer me, but the new light in his eyes showed me that he was taking meeting my mother seriously.
I suppressed a sigh and stepped off the porch. "Let's see how this goes."
We were waiting by the car before she opened the door.
"Hey mom, um… I have someone here for you to meet." I tried to sound as calm as possible, but I knew she would see the uneasiness in my eyes. This was something I'd never done before.
She stepped out of the car with a funny look on her face. "Okay…"
"Hello, my name is Nicholas Ludovic," Nicholas said in a business-like tone as he proudly held his hand out.
She hesitantly held out her hand. "I'm Sandra … how long have you been seeing my daughter?" She pulled her hand away and crossed her arms, looking at me accusingly.
Great.
"Oh…" Nicholas chuckled his sexy deep chuckle, of course in turn making my heart flutter.
"We met a couple days ago and—"
"And I invited him over for dinner." I completed his sentence for him, mimicking my mom's stance by crossing my arms.
"Just because you're the oldest, Abigail Everett, does not mean you can get away with something like this. You have some explaining to do, young lady!" She narrowed her eyes and tried to be fierce. I loved my mother, but I could never predict what was coming out of her mouth next.
"Actually, we were just leaving. I need to take him back to his friend's house," I announced, grabbing the inside of his arm and pulling him toward my car. "I'll be right back," I yelled over my shoulder.
"It was nice meeting you," Nicholas hollered politely over his shoulder as I pulled him away.
When we climbed in my car and started to pull out of the drive, I noticed she still held her stance with her arms crossed. I had a feeling I was going to have 'the talk' when I got back home. I internally cringed.
I peeked at Nicholas when we got onto the road. He looked like he was in deep thought, staring intently at me, like he was trying to figure out an impossible math problem.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
He hesitated for a minute before speaking. "What was your mother's name?"
"Sandra… why? Do you know her?"
Silence.
The reflection from the low glow of the dashboard brought out shadows on his face that made him look dangerous.
"You have a sister. A sister named Olivia," he said menacingly, with a wicked sneer on his lips.
I hesitated. "How do you know my twin sister's name?"
He swore and leaned back into the seat with an angry hand over his mouth.
"Why? What's wrong?" I was looking back and forth between him and the road, contemplating pulling over.
The look on his face made my heart stop. There was so much fury and hate in his expression that he didn't seem anything like the warm, happy Nicholas I knew — the Nicholas that I loved.
"You have no idea, do you? You have no idea who I am… or who you are. Or better yet, you have no idea what you are."
Chapter 9
Thunder crashed angrily overhead and lightning flashed like a strobe light. It cast furious shadows over Nicholas’ face, making him look more and more dangerous.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Pull over."
"But — "
"Pull over, now."
I found a gravel road and veered off to the side, slammed my car into park and crossed my arms, terrified at the recent turn of events. The rain was coming down hard, and if I wasn't mistaken, I could have sworn I saw some hail.
He sat very still, angrily pinching the bridge of his nose. He was deep in thought and refused to look at me.
"Nicholas, please. Please tell me what's wrong." I reached my hand over and placed it on his lap, immediately feeling the warmth, the electricity, and all the wonderful things in the world in that small touch.
His expression softened minutely and he lowered his hand from his face. He let out a deep, silent sigh and peered over at me.
"Abby, I can't lose you." His voice was so pained that it made my stomach drop.
"What makes you think you are?" I raised my hand from his lap and stroked his soft, dark hair. The pain I felt coming from him was making me hurt just as much, if not worse.
He closed his eyes while my fingers in his hair soothed him. "I've never felt anything like this before — with you. Sometimes I find random people like… us. I just figured you were Amitto." He forced the r
est of his breath out and shook his head.
I blinked, trying to figure out what he was saying.
"But now? Now that I know who you really are?" His eyes turned sorrowful, followed with a hurt that nearly brought tears to my eyes. He remained still for a long moment, studying me and thinking.
The silence was killing me.
"How much do you know?" he suddenly asked. There was intensity in his expression now, a determination.
I pulled my hand away and felt confusion cross my features. "I don't understand."
"When did you turn?" he pressed again, quirking an eyebrow.
I stared. I had no idea what he was talking about and was terrified to ask.
When I didn't answer, he raised both of his eyebrows in utter shock. "Your father never told you anything?"
My eyes grew wide. How did everyone know about my father? I couldn't for the life of me piece it together.
Taking my silence as an answer, he released a dark, dangerous laugh and leaned back into the seat.
"Well this could work to our advantage." There was confidence in his voice — light back in his eyes. "I have NO idea why your father would let you of all people live in this world without explaining anything." He raised his voice and shook his head as he spoke. "This proves that your side is the crooked side."
I narrowed my eyes.
"Don't you dare talk about my father like that! You didn't know him and you have no right to judge him for his actions." I felt the blood rush to my face and my lips turn to a sneer. I may not know what 'side' he was talking about, but his tone and comments were inexcusable.
He lowered his voice and grabbed both of my hands. I hadn't realized they were both in hard fists. His touch immediately calmed me. His big, warm hands were soothing and they brought back the tingling electricity.
"I'm sorry for what I said, but please listen to me Abby. There are a lot of things that your father needed to tell you, and didn't. Maybe he thought it wouldn't happen to you — maybe he thought, for some insane reason, that by not telling you he was protecting you — I don't know. All I know is that right now, the less you know about this, the better. I'll explain everything to you once I get a chance to figure this out. And I promise — swear even, that I will do everything I can to get through this so we can be together."
I released the breath I didn't know I had been holding. I tried to break down everything he'd just told me. His words sent me mixed emotions — I tore myself away from his eyes as I tried to digest it all.
Hearing the sweetness of his promises warmed me. I tried to think of what could possibly keep us apart, but I couldn't focus on that. Not right now. There was something else that had my mind reeling.
My father. He had kept something from me — something I needed to know. He never once warned me about the strange things I'd been experiencing. And he knew about them — knew it would happen. I could have been preparing for it instead of thinking I was crazy. And worst of all, other people knew about it. Other people knew my father better than I did.
I couldn't help the hurt I felt that followed after that.
In that moment I realized that I was ready to understand this new me. There was a fire, a determination that burned inside of me. I craved to have all the answers. The feelings I could read — this new muscular body of mine, I was ready to understand it all. I had to master it.
"Nicholas, what happened on the porch — when we shared that connection?"
Instead of answering me right away, he shook his head with confidence. "Nope. Like I said, the less you know right now, the better."
"But you have to tell me! Something's been happening that I don't understand. I need your help. Please, help me understand — I don't know who else to turn to!" I pleaded, almost begged. I was grasping his hands with fierceness and desire. He was the only one that could help me.
"Abby, do you trust me?" He let go of my hands and cupped either side of my face.
"Of course," I whispered without hesitating. His hands on my cheeks distracted me, almost making me forget what I was determined to find out. Almost.
"So trust me now when I say that I can't tell you. Yet." The pained look in his eyes returned. I knew he wanted to help and hated the fact that in refusing to do so, he was hurting me. For some reason I didn't understand, he couldn't help me yet. But I trusted him and nodded slightly.
He pulled my face to his and kissed me fiercely, crushing his soft lips hard against mine. I hadn't been expecting it, but I sunk into the sweet bliss of the kiss anyways.
****
When I pulled up to Ray's house, he unbuckled his seatbelt and glanced at me hesitantly.
"Abby… I have to leave for a while."
My stomach plummeted. I had to force in each breath to keep breathing. My ears started ringing like I'd been struck on the side of the head with a baseball bat. I swallowed repeatedly, attempting to push down all of the sudden questions and feelings that came to me in a rush.
"I'm so sorry… I need to figure a few things out. I will come back for you."
"Wh-when will you be back?" My eyes brimmed with tears and I had to blink them away to see clearly again. I'm not sure what expression I held on my face, but Nicholas’ looked anguished and devastated.
I wondered if his mirrored mine.
He reached up and softly wiped my tears away. "I'm not sure." He looked down at his fingers where my tears had been, and then slowly brought his gaze back to my eyes. "I won't be long. I'll miss you every second I'm away." He pressed my hand gently to his lips. It sent a warm shock wave up my arm — it felt sweet and alive and wonderful.
"And you can't tell anyone you met me. Your mom knows me now, but maybe she won't say anything — I don't think she knows about me. I know this is confusing, but if you do what I say, then everything will fall into place."
I nodded hesitantly and he smiled in return.
He let go of my hand, opened the door and disappeared into the storm.
****
When I saw that front door, I didn't hesitate for one second. I slammed it open and heard it hit the inside wall and rattle from the force of the swing. I didn't know if this would work, but I had to try. I ran fast and hard, kicking the laundry basket along the way before I skidded to a halt in the kitchen.
"Get out here, old man. You got a lot of explaining to do."
I knew he was here. I could smell the whiskey. I crossed my arms and waited.
Several moments passed before I heard sloppy shoe scuffs enter the kitchen. I turned my head, watching him walk in expectedly.
And I gasped.
"Abigail. What have you done?"
It was the worst I'd ever seen him. He was drenched with sweat and his hair was mopped in grease as if he hadn't showered in who knows how long. His eyes were blood red — but that wasn't what was different. They were always like that. It was the massive bags under his eyes that hung low and dark, masking his familiar face — like he hadn't slept in a week. He swayed a bit and bumped into the counter — a ting from the bottle in his hand echoed throughout the room. His mouth hung open as he stared at me, taking in and releasing ragged breaths while he waited for my answer.
"Nice of you to clean yourself up for me. But the question is, Pops, why haven't you told me anything?"
"You are never to speak to Nicholas again," he stammered, with a low grumble coming from deep in his chest.
I ignored his command.
"You see me every night. You could have been preparing me for this! You owe me an explanation and it better be a good one."
"I. Don't. Owe. You. Anything." His voice was slow and menacing, his haggard expression never changing.
"Right. You think it was fair to have mom fend for herself and raise two girls? Don't you dare tell me you don't owe me anything — that you don't owe mom or Liv anything. You left us because you're selfish and used…" I stopped and glanced down at his hand. "Still use a crutch to escape reality, whatever reality it is that you face now." I g
estured toward the nearly dry bottle he held and felt a little twinge of regret when I saw him wince.
"And then come to find out that — that weird things have been happening. And you knew they would! You never once warned me. You never even hinted to the fact that things might change. I thought I was going crazy!"
I stopped and turned away from him. Seeing him in such bad shape made my stomach ache and I was afraid I'd start crying if I kept facing him.
"I — I can sense things… feelings, emotions. I can see and feel and hear them — I'm not sure what to think about it."
I lifted my shirt, just enough to see the outline my stomach, and glanced down. I wasn't sure what I'd find, but wasn't surprised with what I saw.
"You see this? My body's changing too. My muscle tone and complexion, look it's — I'm glowing like a freaking candle!" I pointed at my stomach as I spoke, only it didn't look a thing like the one I remembered. A slightly defined six-pack rested below my skin. It wasn't too discernable, but it was there.
Just like I saw in the mirror when Miles was over, my skin gave off a brilliant glow. The glow of my skin brought out an admirable definition of my muscle tone. I wondered how all this carried over into my dream, but wasn't going to spend my time worrying about that. I had more important questions to ask.
"What does it mean? What am I supposed to do — and what am I?" I hesitated for a moment before I peeked back up at him. He was still standing where I last saw him with the same haggard expression and ragged breaths. Only his eyes bore utter disappointment.
"I've already told you what you need to do. You need to leave Newton. You need to leave and never, ever come back."
Chapter 10
I sat straight up. A dull ache that came from deep in my chest had suddenly become so unbearable that it awakened me. I had fallen asleep almost immediately from exhaustion, and now that my body had rested, reality set in. I ached for Nicholas. There was a burning sensation in the back of my throat and I brought in desperate breaths while I attempted to swallow my tears. I instinctively clutched at my chest — desperately trying to ease the dull ache by wrapping my arms around my torso, squeezing as hard as I could.