Bellamy sniffled and fell into my chest. Her shoulders were shaking, and really, I had no idea a phone call could be so fucking difficult.
“I’m sure they are the prettiest on the block,” I said. I had no idea what else to say.
“You said you’re doing well?” she asked, but I knew instantly it wasn’t me she was asking about.
Bellamy pulled back and nodded. Tears stained her face. “Yes, been busy, but everything is fine.”
“That’s good to hear,” she murmured. “I’ve missed talking to you.”
Bellamy touched the phone, pulling it closer as if hearing her voice was the most precious thing ever.
“So have I. I should call more often,” I said.
“Yes, please do. Call anytime.”
Bellamy sniffled and signaled for me to wrap it up.
“I’ve got to get going, but please take care of yourself. The winter months can be very long.”
“I will. You take care, too. It was so good to speak with you, Liam.”
After the call ended, Bells took my phone and hugged it to her chest, lay against me, and cried quietly.
I rubbed her back because I didn’t know what else to do.
After a while, I asked, “How long has it been since you’ve seen your mom?”
“A year and a half.”
“And your dad?”
Her breath caught, and her trembling increased. “Almost two years.”
Did that mean she’d been alone all that time? With no one?
I wanted to demand answers, but she was already upset enough. “C’mon,” I said, standing and taking her with me. “Time for bed.”
I carried her up to her room, let us in, and fended off an overly excited Charlie, who had hung out here while we ate dinner.
After putting her down, she’s grabbed my shirt off the end of her bed and hugged it to her chest. “You can’t have this back,” she mumbled and started toward the bathroom.
I chuckled. “I wouldn’t dream of taking it.”
I put on the Cooking Channel (she seemed to like it) and turned off all the lights except for a small lamp. When she came out of the bathroom, she looked vulnerable and sexy with my shirt falling around her legs.
Without saying anything, I pulled the covers back and gestured for her to get in. She trudged over and slipped beneath. I moved to cover her, but she glanced over her shoulder. “Will you lie here with me?”
I kicked off my shoes and slid in behind her, drawing her against my body. Charlie jumped up on the mattress, and I started to tell him down, but she squeezed my hand not to. The dog settled on the other side of her with a great huff.
Her giggle filled the corners of my heart, and she scratched behind his ears.
After a few minutes, she settled more firmly into my embrace. “Thank you for calling her. I feel so much better knowing she’s okay.”
I kissed the back of her head and snuggled her tighter.
She fell asleep in my arms, and I lay there and wondered how I could fix whatever was going on. It was hard to find a solution for a problem you didn’t know.
I drifted off at some point and awakened when the sky was just beginning to lighten. It was hard to slip out of the bed. I almost didn’t, but I knew if I stayed, I wouldn’t be able to keep myself from her body.
I knew I could have her, that if I started touching her, she probably wouldn’t stop me.
I held off, though. Having her body wouldn’t mean as much if I couldn’t have the rest of her, too.
Bellamy
I was running out of underwear.
After a few days of being here at BearPaw, my getaway stash was dwindling. And I was sort of super tired of only having a pair of jeans as pants.
I wondered about my apartment. About my things. Was it all still there waiting for me to come back? Would the place still have bruschetta remains everywhere? Was the stove still on?
Or maybe the men had come back, hoping I would be there. Maybe they’d trashed the place as a message.
I wondered if the police knew I was missing. Maybe someone from work called them when I stopped coming in. Or perhaps they didn’t care since I wasn’t social and hadn’t bothered to make friends with any of my co-workers.
I watched the news every morning, never seeing anything about me. But that didn’t necessarily mean no one was looking. It didn’t mean I was safe.
I was starting to feel safe, though. Just a little bit every day. Every day I got just a tad more comfortable, started to feel a tad more at home.
I didn’t even miss Chicago. Well, aside from my underwear and the rest of my wardrobe. And maybe that bottle of wine I’d gotten that night.
It was odd I was hiding here. I felt more like me than I had in years. In a place I vowed to never return to. A place I’d come to as a last resort. I didn’t plan to stay. Now, I didn’t want to leave.
Eventually, I was going to have to go. The night I fled my apartment, I pretty much became a ghost. A fugitive from killers. A woman who would never be able to settle again.
I could go to the police. I could go back into witness protection. They’d tell me I was safe. Change my name, my identity, and move me across the country.
I’d be a sitting duck. And I’d be miserable.
It seemed no matter what choice I made, I was screwed. At least I knew my mother was safe.
For now. The whisper in my head was not welcome. I heard it anyway.
What I wouldn’t give to go back to eight years ago on that morning I saw Liam with that other girl. I wished I hadn’t run away. I couldn’t help but wonder what might have been.
I wondered that a lot.
The knock on the door made me smile, something else that changed since I got here. Instead of cringing and hiding, I anticipated seeing Liam’s face.
Still, I was no fool. I went to the door, bouncing from side to side on each foot. Charlie jumped and fidgeted beside me, then glanced up and whined.
I laughed. He knew who it was, and he was just as excited as me.
“Who is it?” I called out, even though Charlie’s reaction already told me.
“Like you don’t already know,” Liam intoned.
Charlie barked, and I opened the door and stepped back. The giant St. Bernard bounded through the doorway and nearly plowed Liam over.
Liam laughed and scratched Charlie as his tail beat.
“Your dog missed you,” I said.
Liam grunted and came into the room. “Since he’s practically been living with you, I might argue.”
Charlie brushed up against Liam’s side, leaving a giant string of drool in his wake.
I laughed.
Liam caught me around the waist and pulled me into him. “How about you? Did you miss me?”
“Maybe,” I said, ducking my head.
He picked me up, my feet dangling over the floor like I was a ragdoll. “I don’t like that answer.”
He made my heart sing. I giggled. “I just saw you a few hours ago.”
He shook me gently. “Try again.”
“Aren’t your arms getting tired?” I wondered.
“Bellamy,” he growled.
“I missed you.”
He brought me close, and my legs wrapped around his waist. Our lips fused, and I melted into him like butter on a slice of hot toast. His fingertips found the hem of my T-shirt and pushed up until his palm was flat against my back.
I purred against his tongue, and he stroked it deeper, angling his head so he could achieve optimum penetration. My fingers coiled in his hair, as the rest of the world slipped away.
Between my legs, the last clean pair of panties I had grew damp, and I shifted my weight subconsciously, trying to satiate a hunger only he brought out in me.
I felt his fingertips dig into my back, drag down my spine, and flirt quite scandalously with the waistband of my panties.
Liam pulled his mouth away and swiftly sat me away from him. I swayed on my feet, and he came back, usin
g his hands to steady me.
He’d slept in my room every night since the night he called my mother. The night I’d asked him to hold me. I didn’t have to ask anymore. It was as if he knew. I hadn’t slept so peacefully in so long. It was almost shocking how much clearer my head was in the morning after an actual night of restful sleep. Add that to all the meals he kept having sent to my room and the lunches I ate with him and Alex every day… It was almost a complete change in me.
Food, sleep… feeling safe.
I would never take those things for granted ever again.
We never did more than sleep, though. He would hold me, and I would drift off. He never stayed the entire night, though. And he never kissed me in bed, unless it was on the forehead.
The kisses like we just shared, they were coming more frequently. The need for him bubbling in my blood was soon going to boil over.
I knew I shouldn’t, but oh my, I wanted to. I wanted him.
“Why aren’t you dressed?” he asked, suddenly noticing I was still only wearing his T-shirt.
“You don’t like my outfit?”
He lifted an eyebrow. “You know damn well the answer to that.”
I smiled, sort of feeling like an overfull cat.
He groaned beneath his breath and rubbed his hand over the back of his neck. “You test my patience like no other.”
I blinked innocently, secretly thrilled. I hoped he felt even a fraction of the desire he inspired in me.
“I have lessons,” he said, his eyes lingering on my body.
I flopped down on the side of the bed and fed Charlie a piece of toast.
“No wonder he wants to stay here when I creep out at the crack of dawn,” Liam muttered.
“Why do you?” I asked, pausing, toast in midair.
“Why do I what?”
“Why do you leave early in the morning? Are you afraid the staff knows you’re sleeping up here?”
His eyes flashed with shock. A couple strides brought him to where I sat. He kneeled on the floor in front of me, angling his body between my knees. Before he spoke, he ripped the toast out of my hand and tossed it to Charlie, who gulped it down in one swallow.
Small shivers rushed up and down my arms and legs when he placed his hands on my knees. He was always so warm. “I don’t care who knows I’m up here with you. Hell, I’ll go downstairs and call a staff meeting and tell them all right now.”
“I don’t think that’s necessary,” I said dryly.
“You’re right. It’s not.” He grinned. “‘Cause they’re all already gossiping like some reality show, and they think I don’t know it.”
A flicker of embarrassment went through me. “I’m sure I can imagine what they’re saying.” Swallowing, I looked at things as I’m sure they were being perceived by the staff here at BearPaw.
The beloved athlete, their soon-to-be boss, the town sweetheart since birth… and here I was, dressing in the same outfit day after day, showing up with too-big, janky stolen shoes and no coat. My room was in his name. He sent food up every morning, and I ate lunch with him every afternoon.
I trailed along to his lessons and basically shared custody of his dog. They all probably thought I was using Liam.
And if I was being one hundred percent honest with myself, I kinda looked like a whore.
The thoughts made me jolt up. I would have rushed away from him, but he kept his hands on my knees and pushed me back down. “Where do you think you’re going?”
“This is wrong.” I fretted. “I really need to go. I’ve already screwed up my life, my mother’s life… I can’t do it to you, too.”
Liam frowned, and I used the opportunity to slip away from him. Rushing to my bag, I pulled out the envelope of money my father had given me. He hadn’t lied that day almost two years ago. He said the money was clean, that he wanted me to have it.
The police checked. The money was indeed earned by my father. Legally.
And he’d given it all to me.
I’d probably wonder until the day I died if he would have had enough to buy himself out of trouble if he’d used it. My lawyer told me once it wouldn’t have been enough…
But I would still always wonder.
It was only a few thousand dollars, but it was still a decent stash, especially for a girl who needed to run away and start over. I counted out a thousand and whirled to give it to Liam. I gasped and fell back because he wasn’t across the room anymore, but right behind me.
“Easy,” he murmured, reaching out to steady me.
I brushed away his hands and shoved the cash between us. “Here.”
“What the hell is that?”
“You said I could pay you back for everything.” I shook the money at him. “I’m not sure if this will cover it all. Those boots…” My voice trailed off as my gaze lingered on those beautiful, too-expensive boots he’d bought me.
He made a sound and knocked my hand aside. “I’m not taking your money.”
“You have to!” I exclaimed.
“Why?” he intoned. He was a stubborn mule!
“Because I take care of myself.”
“No.”
I gasped. “No!”
“No.”
“Take the money, Liam,” I growled.
He folded his arms over his chest and narrowed his silvery eyes on me. It was quite intimidating, and I was starting to feel a little shaky. I hated the feeling. Being weak.
I knew I wasn’t. Not really. But to be honest, confrontation wrecked me. Since that day I hid between two walls and watched two men confront my father… to death.
“Please,” I said, my voice hoarse. My arm was still extended between us, holding out the cash.
Liam sighed and took the bills. Then he folded them in half and grabbed my still-extended arm, tugging me gently into him.
The next thing I knew, he’d picked me up and sat down the bed with me in his lap. The money lay forgotten beside us, and he lifted my chin with the back of his hand. “Why are you suddenly so intent on giving me a stack of money?”
“I was always going to give it to you.”
“Why now?” His voice was patient. Kind.
It was almost my undoing.
“Because I look like a whore!” I exclaimed.
He drew back, shocked. “What?”
“I’m staying in this nice suite under your name, wearing clothes you paid for and eating meals you send up or charge to your account. You said it yourself. Everyone is talking… and it looks like I’m taking advantage of you.”
He jolted up, bringing me with him. Then he set me on my feet. “You are not a whore,” he spat as though the mere suggestion disgusted him.
“Liam, just take the money. Please.”
“Get dressed,” he said, his voice hard.
“Liam—”
“Dressed!”
Charlie went to the corner and lay down. Clearly, the deadly calm yet severe tone was one he knew not to mess with.
I made a face at Liam, and he came over and pulled the T-shirt off my body in one swift movement.
I gasped and moved to cover up my bare chest.
He gaped. “Why the hell are you not wearing a bra?”
“I don’t sleep in a bra, you jackass!” I said, flinging my arms out, giving him a good view of the girls.
He averted his eyes.
I started crying.
It was my last straw. Oh my God, the amount of emotion that bubbled up inside me was almost too much. I felt as if I were being ripped apart by emotions that were sharper than knives.
I spun, feeling my hair float out around me in a curtain. My vision was blurred as tears fell from my eyes. Rummaging around in my bag, I searched for my bra and T-shirt, only to realize they were hanging in the bathroom. Keeping my back turned, I reached for the sweater lying nearby to cover up before I went into the bathroom.
“Bells,” Liam’s voice was so soft. It made me cry harder.
The bastard.
H
e reached for me, and I jerked away. “Don’t touch me.”
“Hey,” he said again, ignoring my demand. His fingers curled around my upper arm and tugged me around.
I snatched up the sweater and held it front of me like a blind.
He yanked it away and threw it on the floor. “Stop.”
“Stop covering up what you clearly don’t want to see?”
A rough noise ripped from his throat, and I was pulled into his chest. My body slammed up against his, my entire naked torso.
Hell. All I had on was panties.
Reaching down, Liam carefully brushed the long strands of my hair back over my shoulders, removing any concealment I might have left.
“Why are you doing this?” I whimpered.
“I didn’t mean to yell at you, sweetheart,” he murmured, grazing a finger over my collarbone. “And I sure as hell didn’t mean to make you feel embarrassed for being… naked under my shirt.”
“I’m not naked,” I muttered.
He smiled but quickly tried to conceal it.
“I’ve been wanting to see you like this since I saw you standing in the middle of the lodge that night.”
I snorted.
“I’m serious. I’ve been trying to take it slow.”
“Slow?”
He nodded. “That’s why I get out of bed every morning. I don’t trust myself to be in this bed when you wake up looking all sleepy and sexy with mussed hair, wearing my shirt.”
“You don’t have to say that.”
“I’m not just saying that, Bells.” His voice was a little sardonic.
I gave a little huff, and he grabbed my hand, guiding it to the front of his jeans.
I drew in a breath. My eyes flew to his face. Liam was stiff as a board.
“I’m pretty sure the raging hard-on I have isn’t just me pretending.”
I gave it a little squeeze, and he moaned.
“Liam.” I wetted my lips with the tip of my tongue.
He pulled my hand away and kissed the back of it.
“I want to rip those panties off you and do things that will make you walk funny and tremble for a week,” he murmured, stepping forward, making me walk back. “I want to hear my name fall off your lips when I make you come. I want to touch your entire body a million times over, then do it a million times more.”
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