by Zoey Draven
He led her back to the circular living room and then stopped in front of the floating crystal on the column. She looked from him to the crystal in confusion and then he reached forward to grab it, holding it out for her to see.
“I don’t understand,” she said, her gaze straying to the crystal. It was beautiful, almost completely symmetrical.
Vaxa met her eyes. “I lied to you on our vessel.”
“Okay,” she said, drawing out the word.
“Luxirians do possess the technology and means to travel to the Fourth Quadrant…to Earth.” Kate stared at him as he held up the crystal. “This is a Luxirian crystal. It has been in my family for a long time. It is the most perfect one ever discovered on Luxiria.” He swallowed, his shoulders pushing back a little. “And it would generate enough power to return you to your home, on one of our ships.”
Kate felt dizzy. She shook her head. “Why…why would you lie to me? Why would you say that?”
“You honestly do not know, female?” he asked, gaze hardening, slowly lowering the crystal. “You were so intent, so obsessed, on returning to your home. I would have said anything to make you stay.”
Indignation rose within her. “And can you blame me for that? I’d just been kidnapped by aliens, taken from my home against my will, and then taken by you. All I wanted was to return to a place that made sense to me, not to be shuttled around the universe like your war prize!”
Vaxa’s nostrils flared. “I wanted a chance, luxiva. I knew what you were to me, but you did not feel what I felt. I needed time.”
“Were you ever going to let me go?” she asked, crossing her arms over her chest. “Even if I’d wanted to leave after the month was over, would you have let me go? Tell me that. And don’t lie to me.”
Vaxa’s gaze flitted away and then he said, “I honestly do not know.”
“What does that mean?”
“I would like to believe that I would have been honorable and fulfilled our agreement. But, luxiva, I have realized that when it comes to you…I am not rational. I act on pure emotion and not reason.”
Kate’s heart was pounding in her throat and her cheeks felt hot. She took a deep breath, trying to calm down. “Why are you telling me this now? What changed?”
Vaxa reached out to touch a lock of her hair, rubbing it between his fingertips. She held perfectly still, torn between wanting to lean into him and retreating to be alone, to sort through her thoughts.
With a carefully measured and even tone, he said, “Because when it comes to decisions I have made concerning you, they are not decisions that I am proud of.”
A thought occurred to her suddenly…and the pain she felt thinking it seared through her so unexpectedly that she reached out a hand to the wall to steady herself. “Do you…do you want me to go? Is that what this is about?”
His face transformed into the fiercest expression she’d ever seen. “Nix!” Relief made tears burn the backs of her eyes and she closed them, turning her face away. “Look at me, luxiva,” he ordered, his tone roughened.
When she did as he asked, he handed her the crystal. She took it numbly, her hand wrapping around it. It was smooth to the touch and oddly warm, like it possessed life of its own.
“I want you to have this,” he said, his gaze landing on it. It was a family heirloom, something that obviously held much meaning for him…and he was giving it to her. She swallowed, a small breath escaping her lips. “I want you to have it. I took your choice from you and I have felt much guilt over it. I have lied to you in an attempt to keep you here, with me, and it was a purely selfish decision. Our agreement is terminated, luxiva. I want you to decide for yourself what you want. I will not force you to be here any longer if you wish to go.”
Kate stared at him, feeling a tear drip down her cheek. His gaze drew together tightly at the sight of it and he lowered his gaze in shame.
His voice was gruff as he spoke, “I will leave you to give you time to decide. I will return later in the span and if you wish to leave,” his body went ramrod straight, like the thought was physically painful, “I will have a vessel outfitted immediately. My men will make sure you reach your home safely. You can leave tonight, if that is what you decide.”
And then, with one last lingering look, he was gone.
TWENTY-ONE
During Vaxa’s absence, Kate did everything in her power to distract herself.
She roamed the house, walking from one room to the next. She dusted black sand residue that had blown in with the wind off shelving units and swept the floor with an old rag she’d found. She straightened the furs on their bed, smoothing out every last wrinkle. She fiddled with the silver screen on the wall, trying to figure out how it worked, and smiled to herself when she actually managed to order food. A Luxirian had shown up on her doorstep to deliver the plate of trixava and the strange purple fruit she liked…and he’d seemed quite perplexed to find her there alone. But he’d inclined his head on the way out and said, “Lavrix’an.”
Bidan came by briefly and she’d been happy to see his familiar face. But once she’d reassured him that she’d eaten, he left her at her own request, showing her how to contact him on the silver screen just in case she required his help.
Eventually, once she’d cleaned and bathed again and eaten, she had to sit still and be honest with herself. She had to go over every word that Vaxa had said to her. She had to ask herself if she wanted to return to Earth, if she wanted to go back home to Chicago and to her job and to her best friend, Beks. She had to ask herself if she could leave Luxiria and Vaxa behind or if she would regret it forever.
Sitting in the living room, with her back to one of the cushions, she sighed, staring at the crystal, turning it over in her hands, learning every smooth side of it. It was a simple question. Did she want to stay? Or did she want to leave?
Logic told her what the right decision would be.
But her heart went in the opposite direction. She imagined telling Vaxa that she wanted to go. His face would turn into stone and he would do that Luxirian nod because it was the honorable thing to do. She would be able to feel the turmoil inside him because his blood ran through her veins.
If she told him she wanted to go, she would never see him again. The finality of their time together was certain. He would do as she wished. He would do whatever she wished, she realized, anything she wanted.
Pain seared through her, pricking her eyes. Saying goodbye to him, when she was in the midst of falling in love with him…everything in her rebelled at the thought.
And she realized that she had her answer.
Yes, he had lied to her and it was a real shitty thing to do. But she could understand why he’d done it. Looking back to just a short time ago, her only desire had been to get home. Of course, that would have been her natural reaction! Had Vaxa not gotten her to agree to that deal, she would’ve never given him a chance, given them a chance. Because she’d very much started to think about them as a them.
Through the window facing the terrace, she saw that the suns were beginning their descent. Vaxa would be returning soon—at least she hoped he would be—and she was anxious to see him, to tell him that she wanted to stay, to explore where this would lead.
Kate smiled, looking down at the crystal before pushing to her feet. She approached the column Vaxa had taken it from and she slowly pushed it back into place, watching it bob up and down for a brief moment before settling into a steady float.
She turned her gaze to the door. Now, if only her mate would return.
* * *
It was dark when Vaxa’an landed the hovercraft before his dwelling. He hissed out a steady breath, preparing himself. Luxirians rarely felt nervous, but his heart was heavy with dread. He wanted to rush inside to hear his luxiva’s decision, but he also wanted to stay out on the terrace all night, so that he would not have to face the inevitable.
But he was a Luxirian warrior. He would be strong and he would honor her decision, just like he
’d been trained to do. Strength and honor and discipline…those values had been hammered into his skull.
When he entered the dwelling, he did not see Kat, even though the center hub was ablaze with light. Slowly, he strode towards their quarters, but something caught his eye. It was the crystal, back in its rightful place. Something unfurled in his chest, but he didn’t dare hope, not until he spoke with his mate.
His pace quickened, sensing her presence. She was not in their quarters, but then he heard the trickling sound of water and he veered towards the bathing pool.
Warmth spread through his limbs at the sight of her. She was sitting at the edge of the pool, her back to him, with her feet dangling in the water.
Kat heard him approach and she stood suddenly, turning to face him. Her little feet were wet and made a puddle on the floor but her face softened at the sight of him.
“Hi,” she said and Vaxa’an felt the surge of affection through her veins. Slowly, she stepped towards him and when she was just inches away, she touched his chest with both of her hands, sliding them up until they wrapped around his neck. She pulled him down for a kiss and he immediately pulled her closer, breathing in her scent, feeling his body respond.
When she pulled back, Kat looked up at him, biting her lip, and then said, softly, “I don’t like that you lied to me, Vaxa.”
Shame swarmed him. “I know, luxiva.”
She sighed. “But I do understand why you did it.” Vaxa’an said nothing, waiting for her to continue, his blood pumping. “And I forgive you for it, but I don’t want you to lie to me again.”
Vaxa’an swallowed hard, hope making his chest expand. “I will not, luxiva.”
“I—I missed you today,” she murmured, her tone bordering on shy. “I’ve had a lot floating around in my head today but that’s the only thing that I knew was undeniably true. I missed you. And I want to tell you that, even though I think it might be a little crazy, that I might be a little crazy,” she said, shaking her head, “that I think it’s possible you were meant to find me and that I was meant to be here. I mean, how else can we explain the fact that I’m here with you now and that your…your Instinct led you to me? And how else can I explain that feeling when we first reached the rah-vrax-tour, like your Fates were real and that they were there with us. In some crazy, cosmic way, I’ve been thinking that maybe we were brought together for a reason.”
“We were, luxiva,” he rasped, grasping her by the shoulders, running his palms down her arms, and circling her wrists. “We were. I have felt it since I first saw you and I had only hoped that you would feel it in time.”
“I do,” she whispered. “And it scares the shit out of me. Everything about this place, about Luxiria, about you scares the shit out of me. But in a good way.”
Vaxa’an frowned. “I will never hurt you, luxiva. There is no need for you to be scared.”
She smiled, a little laugh escaping her. “It’s an expression, Vaxa. It’s a good scared, I promise.”
There were some things about her language that he feared he would never understand but he let it go. Instead, he ventured with, “The crystal is back on the column.”
Kat swiped her tongue out to wet her lips and then nodded. “Yes,” she whispered. “I put it back once I realized that I couldn’t imagine saying goodbye to you. And I realized that that was my answer.”
A breath hissed out of him and his grip tightened, needing her to say the words. “You will stay with me?”
Kat smiled, bringing his hand up to kiss his scarred knuckles. “Yes, I will stay with you, Vaxa.”
His need for her grew to an intensity that he could hardly bear as every single thread of tension released from his body. When he lifted her off the ground, she gasped. He could not wait another second to be inside his mate, so he ripped at his coverings and then dragged the tunic she still wore from this morning up her thighs.
“Oh,” she breathed when he surged inside. “L-Luxirians love sex, don’t they?”
“You have not realized that by now, mate?” he growled, nipping her neck. “Matings connect us in a way that words sometimes cannot.”
Happiness welled inside him, a feeling that had been a rarity in his life until his Kat had appeared, a gift from the Fates.
“Vaxa, one more thing,” she breathed, her eyes finding his. Her voice went soft and she whispered, “I…I’m falling in love with you. I wanted you to know that.”
Vaxa’an touched his forehead with hers, reaching out with the fellixix so he could feel her more intimately. In a gruff voice, he rasped, “Perhaps words can be better than matings.”
Kate smiled through a soft moan and then he leaned forward to capture her lips, tasting her words, pulling them deep inside him.
And even though neither of them spoke after that, Vaxa’an showed his female exactly how he felt in return.
EPILOGUE
“Are you sure?” Kate asked Privanax, staring at the Luxirian doctor. “Like one hundred percent sure?”
Of course, she’d already had her suspicions, which was why she’d come to the labs in the first place. She’d had Vaxa drop her off on his way to a council meeting and said that she would get a ride back to their house. It wasn’t an abnormal request since Kate had been helping Privanax quite often with his research. The doctor wanted to know every little thing about her species, and even though some of his inquiries embarrassed her, she was glad to be of some help to him.
It had only been a few weeks since the mating ceremony and during that time, Kate had been settling in nicely and finding her own place in their world. After she’d told Vaxa that she would stay with him, and after he finally stopped distracting her with sex, she’d told him that she needed something to do on Luxiria. She didn’t want to sit around the house all day while he went about his duties. It would drive her crazy.
So, shortly after she’d told him about her job on Earth at the publishing house, he’d assigned her to their archives in the center of the city. When Vaxa had first brought her there, she’d fallen in love. It was a grand hall filled to the brim with ancient scrolls and books about Luxirians and their histories and stories of the Fates. Of course, she couldn’t read any of it, but with the help of the archivist, an older Luxirian woman named Bruxilia, whom she was quite fond of, she was learning the Luxirian language little by little, learning to recognize spellings of some words even though they were difficult for her to pronounce. Bruxilia kept her busy with other tasks and Kate returned home at the end of each day with pride.
“Are you questioning my ability to read my own Coms, lavrix’an?” Privanax retorted. Kate was quickly learning that the doctor could get a little prickly when he wanted to be.
Kate bit back a grin but then let out a long breath, looking down at her stomach. She hadn’t had her period since she was back on Earth and she knew that it had been longer than a month. But it went beyond that. She’d just…known.
“Well, I guess I won’t be needing this anymore,” she murmured, raising her wrist, which still held the birth control band that Privanax had put on her before Vaxa had taken her to rah-vrax-tour.
“No, you will not be,” he replied simply, reaching out to take it off. She rubbed her bare wrist. Kate would be lying if she said she wasn’t relieved. Vaxa had started glaring at the band when he thought she wasn’t looking, as if he loathed its very existence. “We will need to monitor your health closely, lavrix’an. This child will be a first for Luxirians…and for humans. We need to ensure your safety and make sure your body can withstand the demands of a Luxirian young.”
“I understand,” she said softly. She should be frightened at the prospect of having an alien child, but she wasn’t. It was just one more reason why she knew she’d made the right choice in staying. She hadn’t regretted her decision at all and Vaxa reminded her every day through his actions why she’d chosen him over her home planet.
“Have you told the Prime Leader about your suspicions?” Privanax asked, running some sor
t of metal tube over her body, glancing at his Com every few moments.
“No,” she said, shaking her head. “I wanted to be sure before I told him.”
“Your pregnancy is in the very early stages. Luxirian females carry—or used to carry—our young for only three lunar cycles. You said that humans have a nine lunar cycle pregnancy?”
“Yes,” she said. Only a three month pregnancy?
Sign me up, she thought.
“We will monitor how quickly the young develops,” he said, sounding positively gleeful, like a kid in a candy store. “This will change everything, lavrix’an. You do realize this, correct?”
“I do,” she murmured, placing a hand on her stomach, wondering when she would begin to show. Privanax finished up with his tests and she smiled softly, hopping off his examination table. “Well, it seems you were right.”
“How so, lavrix’an?”
“You told me that sometimes the Fates know what’s best, even if you don’t see it at the time,” she said, placing a hand on his arm in a goodbye.
“The Fates always have a plan, lavrix’an,” was his answer. “And they have answered all of our prayers this span.”
* * *
Kate was waiting for Vaxa on the terrace later that night when he landed his hovercraft. Her body hummed at the sight of him and he made a growling sound, quickly approaching her before kissing her in greeting.
“It seems my female has been wanting this span,” he murmured. “I thought this morning would have been enough to keep you satisfied until my return.”
She flushed, remembering their activities in the bathing pool, remembering the feel of his mouth suckling on her clit. Her fingers traced over the hard lines of muscle braiding his arms.
“I have something to tell you,” she said. It was dark outside, but the light from inside their house gave the terrace a soft golden glow. Above them, the stars were bright, foreign constellations twinkling. She wondered if Earth’s sun was one of them. The city below was quiet and Kate had to admit that this was her favorite time of day, when Vaxa was relieved of his duties and she felt proud of a hard day’s work and when they were together, just the two of them.