Mrs. Phoenix climbs down the last two steps and speed-walks up to me. She looks tired and worn-out, and as pathetic as it may sound, I appreciate the expressionless look on her face. She doesn’t know, but at some point during the night, I went to the pediatric wing to check on the boys. Nathan, her baby, is fine, but they’re keeping him under observation in case. I overheard that Jason received treatments for a few first and second-degree burns. He has a broken leg, a result of his fall after the explosion I presume, and the smoke he inhaled caused some serious damage to his lungs. Hopefully, it’s nothing a few respiratory therapies can’t fix.
“I’m happy Jason will be okay, Mrs. Phoenix.” I don’t miss the furl of her brows. My voice sounds a lot colder than it should. The truth is, I’m only saying it because it feels like the right thing to say, not because I mean it. I’m not really feeling the empathy right now. Not sure I ever will. Saving her son was a miracle, but it ended up being at a costly expense. “Listen, I, uh—”
“Ten years ago, my best friend Jamie had planned a double date with a couple of guys she met at a party. We were supposed to meet up at a park on the outskirts of Saratoga. Right before I was getting ready to head out, my parents told me I couldn’t go because they had plans of their own. I was forced to stay home and babysit my six-year-old sister, Maya. I got her dressed and had her tag along even though I knew my parents would kill me once they found out I went anyway.”
I frown, wondering where she’s going with her story. “Mrs. Phoenix, as much as I—”
“I got drunk,” she continues, ignoring me. “And while I was supposed to be paying attention to Maya playing tag with at least a dozen of other kids, I decided my time was better spent straddling a guy’s lap while sipping on Goldschlager straight from the bottle. I mean, the guy was hot and my sister was having fun, so what could possibly go wrong, right?” A bitter laugh leaves her. “You know what happens when you drink too much, don’t you, Micah?”
I nod, still not knowing why she’s telling me a tale about her teenage years like I actually give a fuck.
“I’m getting to it, I promise.”
A breeze blows past us, making her blonde hair fly out in every direction. She looks so much different now that she isn’t covered in soot and isn’t in panic mode anymore. Mrs. Phoenix is pretty hot.
“Maya was fast. Every time she got close to getting caught, the twerp would head toward the swing-set to dodge them. It was stupid and dangerous, and I should have stopped her, but I didn’t. There was a guy sitting on the swings. I didn’t notice him at first, but when I did, I remember thinking he was huge. He kept swaying from one side to another every time someone would get near him; it was almost as if he was hoping to hurt one of them.” She purses her lips and snickers. “I did nothing about it, and at some point, when Maya ran past him, he gunned for her. But by the time I realized what was about to happen to my sister, I was too far away and too wasted to do anything about it.”
“Um—”
“There was another kid sitting about fifteen feet away from them.” Her stern blue eyes lock with mine and I know. I know that damn story because I was that other kid. She continues on as if I really need someone to tell me what happened after that. Colton was a beast. He was also an asshole, and if I hadn’t swooped in when I did, Maya would have been knocked to the ground and the scrapes on her knees would have been the least of Mrs. Phoenix’s worries. “I never got to say thank you.”
“With all due respect, Mrs. Phoenix—”
“Beverly. Please call me Beverly.”
I sigh. “Listen, Beverly, although I appreciate the trip down memory lane—” I don’t. It’s a fucking lie. “I don’t see the point to this conversation.”
Her attention shifts to my bike and she contemplates her words a long time before answering me. “The point, Micah, is that this saving people thing; it’s anchored inside you. It’s who you are.” She looks at me again. “Don’t turn your back on it just because you’ve stumbled on a few obstacles.”
A few obstacles? Is she fucking kidding me right now?
“Hey, Lambert?” Aaryn calls out, but I ignore her.
“You don’t get it,” I snap at Beverly.
“Yes, I do.”
“No, you don’t. You think you know who I am, but you don’t. So a twelve-year-old saved your sister from being severely hurt, and you from being scolded by your parents when you were acting like a stupid teenager—you’re welcome. But that doesn’t give you the right to tell me who I am and who I’m not. I was a kid, things have changed since then. I’ve changed since then.”
“Wrong.”
I start to back away.
“What about your fiancée? Your partner or should I say brother-in-law? That family up there loves you, Micah,” Beverly admonishes, and despite my desires to leave, my feet jolt to a complete stop. I study her, both surprised and irritated by how much she’s managed to find out about me in such a short period of time. “You’re making a mistake.”
My lips curl. “One more mistake to add to my list.”
“Except you’re going to regret this one.”
“I regret all of them,” I bark. “And with all due respect, I chose to put my life in destiny’s hands to save your family, so how about you show your gratitude by leaving me the fuck alone.”
“Do you?”
I clench my jaw; my patience is running thin. “Do I what?”
“Regret saving my son?”
I stare at her dumbfounded by her question. My truth… it’s brutal, and I know I’m acting like a dick, but at least it’s the fucking truth.
Thankfully before I consider giving her my honest answer, Aaryn appears in my line of sight. “Are we done here or what?”
“Today is Jason’s birthday.” Beverly wraps her arms around herself and failing to conceal the angry tears that are blurring her clear blue eyes, she looks away. “He gets to celebrate another year of life because of your courage. He gets a second chance at life because of you and Vincent. And if you—if you…” Her head falls back and she releases a load of muttered curses. I can only imagine how she feels and I wish she’d tell me because everything she wants to say, I deserve. “Come back in a year.”
I frown.
“I’ve learned a lot of things since becoming a mom, Micah. I’ve learned when to hold my ground and when to let my kids do stupid things even though I know they’re going to get hurt. So… go ahead, leave. But you need to promise me that next year, on this exact date, you’ll come knocking on my door.”
“And why would I promise you that?”
“Because if you don’t, I’m running up those steps and telling your fiancée you’re leaving her.”
I snicker. Aside from the fact that by the time she does find Aubrey, I’ll be long gone, whether or not she tells her about my plans to leave town won’t change a damn thing. “Beverly—”
“I’m inviting you to my son’s sixth birthday, Micah. The least you can do is show up and see how well he’s doing.” She holds up a finger when she sees that I’m about to protest again. “And when you do meet him, I want you to look me in the eye and tell me that saving Jason’s life was a mistake.”
“For fuck’s sakes, Lambert,” Aaryn grumbles. “Just agree to the stupid plan. Promise her you’ll show up and let’s get a move on.”
Aaryn doesn’t get it. I don’t make promises I know I can’t keep.
Not anymore.
“Beverly, I’m sorry, but I can’t. I’m sorry for what I said—my words were harsh and I get that you’re angry with me.” I breathe out heavily. “If it means anything at all, I really am relieved for you and your family that Jason and Nathan will pull through. But what you’re asking of me… I can’t make that promise. I won’t.”
Beverly’s shoulders sag, but finally she decides to pull away. Putting one foot in front of the other, she slowly starts to make her way back up the steps.
“Dude,” Aaryn laughs, I have no idea why because thi
s is far from being a joke. “What the hell was that about?”
“Nothing.” We make our way to our bikes, and just as I pull my hoodie over my head, the phone in my back-pocket vibrates. “Fucking hell, can’t I catch a break?”
“What?”
I take my cell out and curse when I see the name on my screen.
“What?”
Firefly: Micah! He’s awake. Vince is awake.
Relief washes over me.
Firefly: Are you outside? He says he wants to talk to you.
My fingers twitch over the keypad. I don’t know how to respond.
Firefly: Micah?
“Fuck.”
Aaryn frowns. “Are you going to tell me what’s wrong or not?”
Three Years Ago
“Come on, Lambert, talk to me.”
Holding two bottles by the neck in one hand, and our street-helmets in the other, Aaryn and I walk out the backdoor of the bar, and make our way toward Ethan’s old beat-up Chevy. Behind us, the music is loud, drinks are being poured and people are having fun. Yet, as we make it to the edge of the bar’s backyard and take a seat on the tailgate, nothing is noisier than the heavy silence that’s been lingering between us for the past twenty minutes.
It’s like I can’t find the right words to tell her about my change of heart.
“We’re not leaving.”
She releases an unsurprised snicker and lies back against the old rusty metal to peer up at the stars.
“Aaryn, I’m—”
“Don’t,” she cuts me off. “Seriously, don’t. It’s not worth it.”
“Aaryn.”
“What was it that convinced you, Micah?” I expect the bitterness in her tone, but this is different. It’s almost as if there’s sadness in her disappointment. “Was it Ethan’s wishful dreams or the little angel you’ve been chasing with your eyes all night?”
“Stop talking shit about him, Walker. Ethan would be more than happy to help you if you’d actually allow yourself to let him in.”
“Except he’d expect something in return.”
My jaw ticks. It annoys me when she pulls shit excuses like this. Ethan has been in Aaryn’s life for almost as long as he’s been in mine. I have no idea why he cares so much about us, but we’re both lucky to have him. If not for him, we’d be living on the street. “Not everyone is like the rest of your fucking family, Walker. If he wanted something from you or out of you, he would have made you do it already.”
Her eyes slice to mine.
“He’s a good guy and you know it.”
Aaryn’s childhood was just as fucked up as mine… probably worse. She had to quit school senior year to survive. Her brother is a dealer, her mom’s dead, and although she’ll never confirm it, I’m convinced her father owns some sort of sex extortion business. Basically, she’s the only sane person in her household and the term is used loosely. Aaryn Walker is a sexually driven bisexual, addicted to anything or anyone who can help her lose control. She’s fearless. She wears clothes that have men, me included, biting their fists every time they glance her way. Every inch of her body is toned to perfection, she’s smart, and watching her climb her Honda CBR makes my dick hard every single time.
Her circle of trust is limited to me, and the only reason why she trusts me is because no matter how many times she’ll try, I refuse to fuck her. And that’s the thing about Aaryn and me: as much as I love her, I have no choice but to keep her at arm’s length.
We’re made from the same mold: adrenaline junkies with not a care in the world except ourselves. I don’t trust her, but most of all, I don’t trust myself with her.
“So, the angel?”
My brows furrow. “You don’t even know her.”
“Neither do you.”
“I know her brother.”
“Oh my fucking god, Micah, you met her for less than thirty minutes. I mean come on!”
“I’m not going to sleep with her,” I defend.
“First of all, that’s a lie and you know it.”
Of course, it is. I just need to figure out a way around Vincent for it to happen.
“Dude, if you don’t have sex with her, I will. I’ll lick her sweet pussy and make her come so hard she’ll forget your name.” She wags her brows at my stifled groan. “And you can bet your ass that I have no regrets for putting that image in your mind.”
I chuckle and lay back next to her. “We good?”
“Yeah,” she pushes a strand of hair away from my eyes and lets her fingers lightly caress my unshaven jaw. “We’re good. Lambert, I love you, you’re like the best thing that’s ever happened to me. But I do feel the need to remind you that you’re a walking, ticking time bomb.” Her body shifts to the side, and she props her head up against her palm to get a better look at me. “You do realize that less than two hours ago you almost killed Cade because he came to wish you a happy birthday, don’t you?”
Nothing can make me jerk up faster than the mention of my father. I scowl, putting as much distance between us as I can without actually walking away from her. My father isn’t someone we talk about. Ever. And she knows that there’s a lot more to what happened. “What’s your point, Walker?”
“My point is that anything that makes you tick can also make you explode.”
“Do I need to remind you why I busted Cade’s face? Why I left when he was nothing but a pile of blood at my feet? He’s a piece of shit, Aaryn. You know what he did. Witnessed it with your own eyes—for years. You’ve seen the bruises, cleaned up the blood… and you can bet your ass that if your dad came up to you on your birthday and told you that abusing you was a mistake, that he loves you and that one day he hopes you’ll forgive him: I’d do the same fucking thing to him.”
“I’m not saying that he doesn’t deserve it—”
“Then what are you saying? That I can’t control myself when I’m angry? That I’m just like him? That if I’m not careful I’ll harm innocent people, or worse hurt the very few people I care about?”
“No.”
“Then what?”
She runs her nails through her hair and releases a screeching growl. I’m not expecting a response; don’t want one. What I want is for her to realize that she’s talking shit about who I am, and admit to herself that she’s wrong.
“Nothing. Never mind.” She sits up and leans against the side-panel opposite mine. There’s something up with her, something I can’t put my finger on and for some reason, I also can’t bring myself to ask her what it is.
We stare at each other a long time before either one of us speaks again.
“Think Cade will press charges?”
“Ethan assured me he wouldn’t,” I answer, still a little irritated.
“Of course he did.” She puffs a snort. “He probably paid him off to keep his mouth shut.”
“Aaryn,” I warn.
“He and Dan had to pull you off your own dad before you killed him with your bare hands, Micah.”
“I know, Aaryn, I was there. And now I’m asking you to let it go.”
“Fine.”
“What the hell is wrong with you?”
“Nothing.”
“Nothing? Really?” I bite back. “’Cause you’re acting like a bitch right now.”
Her jaw clenches like mine.
“Aaryn. I get it, okay. You’re pissed that I’m bailing… and you have every right to be. But you should also come out and say it instead of lying to me or accusing me of things you know I’d never do just to piss me off.”
“I’m not trying to piss you off,” she snickers, avoiding my eyes. “Whatever, Micah. You aren’t mine... do whatever you have to do.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing,” she growls. I swear it feels like we’re running around in circles right now. “It means nothing. Do whatever the fuck you want. All I ever cared about is you being happy, so… you know whatever.”
“I’m doing good, Aaryn. I go to school, I h
ave my own place to stay, I’m off the drugs, I don’t drink as much—I mean, do you even care? Life feels… I don’t know, normal.”
“I know.”
“Then I don’t get it.” I leer her way, hoping she’ll explain what’s going on in that pretty little head of hers, but she doesn’t. She just smiles sadly at me.
“I heard Vincent saying you both were looking into opening your own shop.”
I nod.
“This mechanic shit is good for you, Micah.” She gives her head a slight shake. It’s like she wants to say something else, but can’t bring herself to say it, so instead, she releases a quiet chuckle. “But I do think you’re forgetting something.”
“Oh yeah, and what’s that?”
“The little angel that tempted the children of Satan when she walked through The Devil’s Gate.”
A loud roar erupts over the music and our attention shifts. Through the Chevy’s back windshield, we have a clear view of what’s going on inside. But while I can see the guys holding up shot glasses, playing some sort of drinking game, my focus is on the two girls standing in the window. Leah is cozying up with Aubrey. I’ve known Vince’s girlfriend for a long time, she’s been hanging out at the bar for years now, she’s the one who did my ink, and I have to say that I’ve never seen her be so nervous around someone. It’s almost as if she’s scared that Aubrey won’t like her. And although I can tell she has nothing to worry about, I get where she’s coming from. The pull between the twins is strong. I’ve never seen anything like it. When one moves, the other one follows, when one laughs, the other smiles… each one of their actions are mirrored, and the creepiest part is that I’m sure they don’t even notice they’re doing it.
From the corner of my eye, I spot Aaryn bringing her bottle up. A smirk is tugging at her lips while she chugs down her beer. “You’re going to ruin her.”
As if she can feel me watching her, Vincent’s sister looks out the window and locks eyes with me. The connection makes my heart jolt which is the weirdest thing I’ve ever experienced in my life. Aaryn wasn’t lying when she said I’ve been watching Aubrey. I’ve barely been able to look away from her since she walked in.
Broken Promises (Burning Mistakes Book 1) Page 14