“Look,” I said, shaking my head. “I can’t help you. I’m not exactly what Elias told you I was, but I’m not that far off. My life doesn’t have any room in it for helping out some woman I’ve never met. I can’t do anything for you.”
A look of desperation and fear crossed her face. She stood up from the picnic table and took a few steps forward, until she was facing me not two feet away. Her large, dark eyes met mine, imploring me without words, and a shock of electricity shot through me before I knew what was happening. Up until now, I had noticed that she was pretty, but the fucking Minions shirt she was wearing had been so distracting that I hadn’t paid much more attention than that. Up close, with her face raised toward me, I realized for the first time that she was fucking beautiful. Her creamy, clear skin set off the full, pouty pinkness of her lips, and before I realized what was going on, I had grown hard as a rock as my mind conjured up an image of how that soft, full mouth would look wrapped around my dick.
“Please,” she said simply as I fought for self-control. She didn’t seem to have any idea of the fucking effect she was having on me as her voice lowered to a whisper. “I don’t have any place else to go. I don’t have any money left.” Her eyes searched mine, begging me, and my cock jumped in my pants. “Please,” she repeated, softer this time. “Please, just help me find someplace to sleep tonight, and take a shower. I promise I’ll leave you alone after that.”
Goddamn. My heart was slamming against my ribcage so hard I was afraid she’d hear it. She couldn’t have known that all I could think of now was joining her naked body in the shower she’d just asked for, and hearing that throaty little voice beg me for something else entirely. I took a step back and arranged my face in an angry frown. Fuck.
I couldn’t believe I was about to do this. Grey would probably fucking kill me for it.
“Okay,” I growled at her. “One night. One night only.” I nodded back toward the clubhouse. “There’s an apartment upstairs. You can stay there. It’s got a bathroom with a shower.” And a lock on the door.
“Oh, thank you!” she cried, jumping up and down slightly. She smiled at me then, a bright, dazzling smile that lit up her whole face and made my heart start slamming in my chest again. “Thank you so much, Levi!” She stepped forward just a little, then pulled back in embarrassment, her arms clasped tightly to her chest.
Grumbling to myself, I had her follow me to the entrance to the clubhouse and held the door open for her. Inside, I led her through the bar, upstairs, to the nicest of the apartments we kept. After telling her as quickly as I could where things were and, I got the hell out of there and went back downstairs. I announced to the astonished men who had watched me lead her in that she was staying for one night, and that she was strictly off limits.
Then I took out my cell and called the only person I could think of to come help me the fuck out.
“Hey, Seton?” I said when she answered. “I’ve got a situation.”
5
Cherish
I don’t know what I had expected when I met Levi, but the reality of him was both exactly right and not even close.
I had had only the very vaguest memory of him from when I was a child. After all, he had left when I was probably no more than seven or eight years old. When I started making my plans to escape the WFZ Ranch, I hadn’t let myself think too much about what might be awaiting me in Lupine. When Elias said that Leviticus had joined a motorcycle gang (“club,” I reminded myself now), I had imagined a big, hulking bald man with a long, menacing beard, wearing leather and covered in tattoos.
Well, I had gotten the tattoos right. Almost every surface of his skin below his neck seemed to be covered with them. (In spite of myself, my mind wandered to whether he was tattooed everywhere, and I blushed furiously at the thought.) And I had the beard right, as well, though it was shorter and lighter than I had expected, a slightly more reddish tint than the reddish-brown of his hair.
What I hadn’t gotten right was how… attractive he was. Masculine, in a way that was both dangerous and thrilling. Somehow the tattoos, which I had imagined as scary, were actually sort of beautiful. The colorful, geometric patterns accentuated the chiseled muscles on his arms. Tattoos were strictly forbidden in the faith, as were any body alterations, and I had never really seen any up close before. The ones Levi had made my eyes want to linger on his body, and even to touch his skin, to see whether it felt any different on the parts that were covered with the designs.
I hadn’t gotten his eyes right, either. I half-expected them to be dark, menacing, mean. Instead, they were green, a light, penetrating color that was so mesmerizing that I had to work not to fixate on them.
Leviticus had been furious to see me. I hadn’t allowed myself to consider that he might be, but I couldn’t blame him for it. After all, here I was, dropping unannounced into his life from a world he had risked everything to leave behind. I had been lucky, I knew, that he had agreed to help me at all. And frankly, I had been lucky that he wasn’t the evil demon that the community made him out to be. He was scary, for sure. But I sensed that his intention was not to hurt me. He just wanted me gone. It fairly radiated off of him when he looked at me. And I had to live with that, and accept it. It was his right to be angry with me for disrupting his life.
Levi led me through the bar of the clubhouse, the eyes of several other tattooed men and a few busty, made-up women following us curiously. We went up a flight of stairs to the second floor. The doors to most of the rooms were closed, but he led me to one at the far end of a hall and opened it without a key.
“Here,” he said gruffly. “Bed’s over there, bathroom’s through there. Make yourself comfortable. I’m gonna call my president’s old lady to check in on you in a little while. Lock the door.”
And with that, he was gone.
I looked around the sparsely furnished apartment, then sank down on the bed. It was surprisingly comfortable, or maybe it was just that I was exhausted. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. For the first time in almost four days, I was safe, at least momentarily. I didn’t have to look over my shoulder every second. Levi had told me I could only stay for only one night, but I couldn’t let myself think about that now. I knew I needed to just focus on the moment at hand, or otherwise I’d go crazy with fear and worry. Tomorrow was tomorrow. I’d think about what to do then.
I resisted the temptation to just lie back and close my eyes, knowing that I’d be asleep in a heartbeat. Instead, I kicked off my flip flops, spent a few moments massaging my dirty, aching feet, and went into the bathroom. I turned on the shower as hot as I could stand it, and stood under the water for close to twenty minutes, luxuriating in the pleasure of the spray beating against my skin. I had never taken such a long shower before, but I couldn’t seem to get myself to shut the water off. I had brought a couple of travel bottles of shampoo with me, and I used an entire small bottle on my hair, breathing in the scent and being thankful for this smallest of pleasures.
Once I was out of the shower, I stood on the mat with a bath towel around me and fretted at the realization that I’d have to put my dirty clothes back on. Unfortunately, I had no choice. I had brought a few spare pairs of underwear, though, so it wasn’t as bad as it could have been. I carefully washed the underwear I had been wearing in the sink and hung it up in the shower to dry. I towel dried my hair, running my hands through it like a comb, then went back out to the main room, where I lay back down on the bed and, as I knew I would, promptly fell asleep.
A discreet knock on the door woke me up some time later, jarring me out of a confused dream full of tattooed men and the noise of tires on highways. I rose groggily and flipped the deadbolt on the door. A young woman stood on the other side, a paper shopping bag in her arms.
“Hi, I’m Seton,” she said, smiling. “You must be Cherish. Can I come in?”
I stood back from the door and she strode in and set the shopping bag on the table in the kitchenette. When Levi had mentioned som
ething about an old lady, I expected a grandmotherly type, or at least someone my mother’s age. Seton looked to be about twenty-five or so, and she was exceptionally pretty, with wavy brown hair and flashing green eyes. She was dressed simply but stylishly in a red top and jeans that hugged her body attractively.
“Levi called me and asked me to come help you out. He said you needed a change of clothes.” She turned toward me now, eyeing the dirty T-shirt I had had no choice but to put back on after my shower. Her mouth twitched up at the corners. “He wasn’t kidding.”
I opened my mouth to ask what she meant, but her eyes told me everything I needed to know. “I didn’t have many choices at the Goodwill,” I said, looking down at the shirt. “Not good?”
“Not good,” she agreed cheerfully. “Here, give me that, and I can wash it. I’ll give it back, but only if you promise you’ll only use it for sleeping.”
I flushed with embarrassment as I realized how ridiculous I must look, but I could tell she wasn’t trying to be mean to me. I swallowed my pride and forced myself to smile. “Thank you,” I nodded.
Her hand was still out, and I suddenly realized she meant for me to take my shirt off right there and give it to her. My eyes darted toward the bathroom, and Seton must have realized I wasn’t comfortable undressing in front of a stranger. “Here,” she said gently, picking up the shopping bag and handing it to me. “There should be some things in here that will fit you. Go on into the bathroom and find something for yourself.”
I murmured a thank you and did as she asked. In the bag, I found a pair of jeans, a couple of pairs of shorts, a light green flowered sun dress, and a few T-shirts that looked like they would fit me much better than the yellow one did. I selected a pair of jeans and a dark green tank top, resisting the fear of showing my bare shoulders in public and giving in to the temptation of wearing something cool that didn’t scratch at my skin. I put the rest of the clothes back in the bag, and went back out into the main room.
“Much better,” Seton said appreciatively when I came out. “That green is gorgeous with your hair, by the way.”
I blushed at the compliment. “Thank you,” I murmured. “And thank you for letting me borrow these.”
“Nope,” she shook her head. “Not borrow. Those are yours.” When I protested, she laughed me off. “Remember, you’re not to wear the Minions shirt except to bed when I give it back. And besides, those are all clothes I don’t wear anymore. So don’t worry, you’re not putting me out.”
I tried to argue with her, but she wouldn’t have any of it. “The subject’s closed,” she said firmly. She reached into her back pocket and took out a cell phone, glancing at it briefly. “So, I’m guessing you haven’t had dinner yet, right?”
In fact, I hadn’t had lunch, either, but I didn’t tell her that. The events of the day had my stomach in knots, anyway, so I didn’t feel hungry, but I knew that if I didn’t eat at some point, I’d be starving by bedtime. “No, I haven’t.”
“I’ve got a great idea,” she said, her eyes twinkling. “I have had one crazy week, and I could really use a girls’ night out. Let’s you and me go out and get something to eat.”
“I… um, I don’t have any money,” I admitted.
“Oh, I know,” she said, smiling. “Don’t worry about it. I’ve got cash. You can pay me back later if you really want to.”
It was on the tip of my tongue to refuse, but Seton’s smile was so open and accepting, I found myself relaxing a little. My conscience eased just a little at the hope that someday I’d be making my own money, and I’d be able to do pay her back for all of her kindness. As soon as I accepted, she grinned and slipped an arm through mine. “Great! Come on,” she said. “I know just the place.”
A half an hour later, we were seated in a booth at a bustling bar and grill called Hammie’s. Seton introduced me to a friend of hers named Andi, a tall woman with almost platinum-blond hair working behind the bar, who immediately offered us a drink on the house. Seton ordered a margarita, and I frowned, not sure what to order for myself.
“Give her the same,” Seton said to Andi, then glanced at me. “The margaritas here are fantastic.” I didn’t have the courage to tell her that I’d never tried alcohol before, so I stayed silent and thanked Andi for the drink.
When the waitress came, Seton ordered a burger and fries, and I ordered a club sandwich. Then she raised her glass in a toast. “To… hmm. To what? What should we toast to?” she asked.
“To the future,” I said. I didn’t know what it held, but I hoped it would be better than the past.
We clinked glasses and drank. When the tart, strong liquid hit my throat, I started coughing so hard I almost dropped my glass. Seton pressed her lips together, clearly trying not to laugh.
“Um, Cherish, can I ask you something?”
“Of course,” I wheezed at her, clapping myself on the chest and taking a long drink of water.
“Is that the first margarita you’ve ever had?”
There was no use trying to hide anything, I decided. “It’s actually the first alcohol I’ve ever had,” I admitted.
Her eyes went wide. “Really?” she asked. “I mean, I guess it’s not that unusual, but… I don’t know. I guess I just assumed…”
“No, it’s okay.” I had finally gotten my throat to start working again. “Where I come from, women aren’t really allowed to drink.”
“Where you come from?” she repeated. “You know, Levi didn’t really tell me anything about you, other than that you showed up here because he knew your brother from when they were kids.”
I opened my mouth to explain, but then shut it again. I wasn’t sure how much to tell Seton about where I’d come from. On the one hand, my story was my own, but on the other, anything I told her about why I was here would tell her things about Levi, too. Things I wasn’t sure he wanted anyone to know.
“I…” I began, then stopped. “Uh, I grew up in an FLDS community,” I said reluctantly.
“FLDS?” she frowned. “Like, Latter-Day Saints? Mormons?”
“Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints,” I corrected.
“Oh, okay, so Mormons don’t drink alcohol,” she nodded. “Right, I knew that.”
Relieved, I said simply, “Not exactly like the Mormons, but yeah, the alcohol part is the same.”
“So, are you still FLDS?” she asked, hesitating over the letters. “Because if so, I’m sorry I ordered you alcohol. I wouldn’t have, if I’d known.”
“I’m not sure what I am,” I admitted. “But no, I don’t think I’m FLDS anymore.”
Our food came then, and for a few minutes, neither of us said much. I realized once I’d taken the first bite that I was ravenous, and had eaten most of my club sandwich and all of my fries before I knew it. Once I had eaten about half of my burger and demolished most of the fries, I sat back, sighed, and closed my eyes. “Thank you, Seton,” I murmured. “That’s the best meal I’ve had in a while.”
I hadn’t meant to say it; I was just so content that it slipped out. Seton looked at me for a long moment, and then simply said, “You’re welcome. It’s my pleasure. Like I said, I was in the mood for a girls’ night out.”
“Can I ask you a question?” I asked her.
“Sure, it’s your turn,” she said, smiling.
“Levi said you were someone’s ‘old lady’? The president’s, I think? What does that mean?”
Seton laughed. “Yeah, the club president. His name is Greyson Stone. He and I are together.”
“Like… married?” I ventured shyly.
She smiled. “Not yet, no. But soon, probably.”
I nodded but didn’t say anything. Part of me was shocked, but I knew that out in the world, lots of couples were together without being married. Besides, I reminded myself bitterly, if marriage out in the world meant what it had for me and so many other women at the Ranch, it was hardly all it was cracked up to be, anyway.
Seton told me a
little more about Greyson and how they had met. Her eyes lit up as she described what he was like, and little aspects of his personality that she found endearing or funny. The way she talked, it was obvious she was completely in love with him. It made me a little wistful, and when the frowning image of Isaiah Whitehead came unbidden into my head, I pushed it back out firmly.
I took a few more tentative sips of the margarita. It was really strong, but it tasted sort of good once you knew what you were in for. As we finished our food, Seton changed the subject back to me. “So, you said that you came here to Lupine because your brother knew Levi growing up. Does that mean that Levi was in this FLDS community, too?”
My heart began to pound a little faster. Just as I suspected, Seton didn’t know this about Levi. Which might mean that the others didn’t either. “Um, yes,” I admitted. “But he left a long time ago.”
Her eyes widened. “Wow,” she chuckled. “It’s hard to imagine him being in a fundamentalist group.”
I grinned shyly. “Yeah, he’s changed a lot.” I almost laughed at the mental image I had of how people at the Ranch would react if they saw him today, all tattoos, muscles, and leather.
Thankfully, Seton decided to drop the subject of Levi after that, and we spent the rest of the meal chatting about mundane things. I appreciated that she seemed to take care not to pry too much, or ask questions about where I’d be going tomorrow, when Levi had made it clear I had to leave. I had to fight a rising lump in my throat at the thought that I might not even see Seton again after tonight. In many ways, despite the fact that I’d only just met her, she felt like the first real friend I’d ever had. Almost all of the interactions I had had with the girls and women at the WFZ Ranch were completely superficial. Most of the conversations had to do with chores, or childbirth, or keeping a household, or the right way for a woman to be a devoted follower of God and a good wife to her husband. Just to talk with another woman about non-serious things like hair or clothes felt so foreign, but so relaxing, in a strange way. Far from feeling judged by her, or like she was watching me to make sure I wasn’t straying from the path that God had chosen for me, I felt a level of freedom that I had never really felt before. It hurt my heart to think that a few days from now I’d probably never see her again, and she would quickly forget about me.
RIDE (A Stone Kings Motorcycle Club Romance) Page 38