Kept Secrets

by Traci Hunter Abramson

  “I wouldn’t feel comfortable having you fly over here by yourself.”

  “I’m a big girl,” Grace said, even though she really was nervous about traveling where she didn’t speak the language. “I’m sure I can figure out how to get there.”

  “Honey, I appreciate the thought, but I’m going to be working ridiculous hours. I don’t want you to come visit only to be home alone all the time.”

  She let out a sigh. She understood his logic, but she didn’t have to like it. “I really hate this.”

  “I know. I’m not crazy about the situation either.”

  “I never thought being with you would be this complicated.”

  “Sometimes things get worse before they get better.”

  “They’re definitely worse at the moment,” Grace grumbled. Trying to fight away her disappointment, she said, “I’m sorry. I just miss you.”

  “I know. I feel the same way.” Before she could say anything further, he added, “I have to get going but I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

  “Okay. I love you.”

  “Talk to you tomorrow.”

  Grace heard the click when he hung up, and she held out her phone, staring at it. Not once since their marriage had he ended a call without saying “I love you.” Uneasy, she slipped her phone into her purse. He was just busy, she assured herself. The disappointment of not being able to see each other must be affecting him as much as it was her.

  Those thoughts rattled through her brain, but they didn’t chase away the doubt that had been planted. Was Devin really too busy to see her, or was he putting her off because he didn’t want to see her?

  She rubbed a hand over her swelling abdomen, the little bump beneath her skirt that was still unnoticeable to everyone but her. It’s just hormones. She loved Devin, and he loved her. In four more months, they would be together, and then they could focus on finding a new home where they could welcome the newest members of their family.

  * * *

  Devin rubbed a hand over his face, his stomach muscles clenching as he fought against tears. Censoring his words when talking to Grace had been hard enough, but being afraid to express his love for her left a hole in his heart.

  He had hardly slept last night, constantly opening his eyes and looking around the room to make sure he was alone. Visions of some Chinese intelligence operative standing over him with a gun continued to push into his mind, and nothing he did succeeded in squelching the fear that gripped him.

  Running alongside those images was the constant replay of his conversations with Grace over the past week. What had they said that could have compromised her safety or his? The topic of her relocating from New York had been a constant lately, along with whether he would be able to move to the DC area with her. He was rather certain they hadn’t spoken of their marital status, but that didn’t stop the niggling doubt from plaguing him.

  He forced himself to finish getting ready for work, overthinking each step for fear he might change his routine now that he knew someone was listening. How had he become a target? And what did anyone think they could gain from him?

  His brain felt like it was about to explode by the time he walked into his office. Every person he passed, everyone he greeted felt like a threat, and he had to draw deep into his limited acting talents to behave normally. As the day wore on, slowly the adrenaline from his fear wore off, giving way to exhaustion.

  The lines on the marketing report in front of him had been blurring together for the past half hour, and though he had tried to concentrate, when a knock came on his office door, he welcomed the distraction. He looked up to see Fai standing on the other side of his desk.

  Devin stood. “Fai. What can I do for you?”

  “I was looking at the London market today and saw a drop in commodities. Does your research indicate a long-term shift, or do you think this is an anomaly?”

  “Personally, I think that will depend on whether the US’s long-term interest rates go up. I think today’s shift is a result of speculation on whether or not that’s going to happen.”

  They discussed the economics of the ripple effect of the major world financial markets until Fai guided the conversation to more personal topics.

  “Meilin was asking about you after you left last night. She thought perhaps you had a girlfriend.”

  Recognizing the comment as a possible test, Devin skirted the truth while keeping his story consistent with what happened within the walls of his apartment.

  “Actually, I did leave someone behind in the US.”

  “Are things serious?”

  “They were heading that way, but I have to admit that having a long-distance relationship is a lot harder than I thought it would be.”

  “Will she come here to Hong Kong?”

  “I don’t think so. She doesn’t speak the language, which would make it hard for her here.”

  Fai turned to go. “I’ll let you get back to work.” He paused at the door. “Several people from my department are going to the opening of a new art exhibit on Tuesday. Perhaps I will see you there.”

  Devin nodded and watched the older man leave the room. As soon as he was alone, he leaned back in his chair and forced himself to take calm, steady breaths. Had Fai simply been making conversation, or had he been fishing for information?

  Again the question simmered in his brain. Why would anyone target him? Beyond his language abilities, he didn’t know enough about anything in the intelligence community to warrant the attention of the Chinese, and he couldn’t think of anything he had done to draw attention to himself.

  He remembered Jalen’s comment about how the CIA had put his application in a number of months before. Perhaps it wasn’t him who had made a mistake. Perhaps something in the CIA’s processes had compromised him before he’d even started. If that was the case, what was he even doing here? Whether it was in New York City or Washington, DC, he would much rather be on the other side of the world with Grace.

  * * *

  Fai handed Qing the transcripts from Devin Shanahan’s conversations in his apartment.

  “Did you find anything of significance?”

  “Possibly,” Fai said. “Every morning at the same time, Devin calls a woman in the United States.”

  “Who is she?” Qing asked.

  “We believe she is the woman he left behind, but all we know is her name is Grace.”

  “Did you trace her phone?”

  “Her phone is encrypted.”

  “And his phone?”

  “Encrypted as well.”

  Qing scanned over the transcripts. “It appears this woman may be of use to us.”

  “How do we find her? All we know is that she lives in New York and works for Anderson Enterprises.”

  “See if you can find anything through her work. I’ll request a trace on Devin’s other communications. Perhaps she also talks to him on his work phone or sends him e-mails.”

  “What do you plan to do when we find her?”

  “I plan to see how much she knows about Mr. Shanahan’s real reason for being here. And if necessary, we will use her to get exactly what we need.”

  Fai bowed his head. “I understand.”

  Chapter 18

  She couldn’t stand it anymore. Despite setting off insect bombs twice in the past week, every day when she got up and flipped on the lights, cockroaches scurried across the floor and kitchen counters.

  The futon couch that doubled as her bed thus far seemed to be immune to the infestation, but she suspected it was only a matter of time. The truth was, the futon mattress was far less comfortable than advertised online, and her back ached from the lack of support.

  She needed a real bed and a real apartment. And a real exterminator.

  Devin still hadn’t confirmed whether he would be able to work in his company’s DC office when he returned home, but it wouldn’t hurt for her to ask her HR department if that option was still available to her.

  She crossed her legs
on her couch and pulled her computer onto her lap. She had yet to sign up for Wi-Fi, but the couple next door had an open network she was able to use if she situated herself just right.

  On a whim, she checked her company’s website for available job openings. Her heart lifted when she saw that both Washington, DC, and Los Angeles had listings she was qualified for.

  She then typed in Revival Financial and did a similar search.

  She was disappointed when she didn’t find anything available in either location. Curious to see if there were any other locations where both companies had job openings, she continued looking through the company’s website. When she happened upon the page that identified all of their office locations, Grace froze. She read over the page four times, certain she must be missing something.

  A few more open web pages confirmed what she had first seen, but she couldn’t believe it. She found the contact number and called the company directly.

  A woman answered, her voice businesslike. “Revival Financial. How may I direct your call?”

  “I’m trying to locate the address for your office in Washington, DC.”

  “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we don’t have an office in DC.”

  “What about Los Angeles?”

  “No, ma’am. Our offices are located in Hong Kong, Tokyo, London, Frankfurt, Paris, and New York.”

  “And you don’t have any subsidiaries located elsewhere?”

  “No, ma’am.”

  Grace’s heart sank. “Thank you for your help.”

  She hung up. Devin had been so certain that his company had offices in both DC and LA. After more than two months with the company, how was it that he didn’t know his assumption was wrong? Or had he been lying to her all this time? And why would he?

  All throughout high school, he had been one of the most honest people she’d known. Had something happened to change that? And did he really intend for them to be together as husband and wife when he returned to the United States? Was he even planning to move back to the US?

  A wave of nausea threatened. She looked at the clock and did the calculations. Nine o’clock on a Saturday morning meant it would be ten o’clock on Saturday night in Hong Kong. She gripped her phone in her hand. She and Devin had agreed on when they would talk to make sure they weren’t interrupting the other’s work or sleep.

  At the moment, she didn’t care what he was doing. She needed answers, and she needed them now.

  She dialed his number, her free hand falling to rest on her stomach. If nothing else, Devin needed to know about the babies and have time to prepare for fatherhood.

  The phone rang five times and rolled to a generic voice-mail account. Her stomach churned uncomfortably, but whether it was from stress or hormones she didn’t know.

  She crossed the room to the kitchen counter and sent the last of the roaches scattering. Opening one of the cabinets, she fished out a box of saltine crackers and pulled out a handful. Three crackers and a glass of water later, she dialed again.

  This time Devin answered on the third ring, the sound of music playing in the background. “Grace. Is everything okay?”

  “Not exactly.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  Where to start? Grace thought of the canceled trip to London, the deception regarding his job, the surprise she had planned when she told him of their pregnancy that he had totally ruined.

  “Are you okay?” he asked before she could formulate an answer.

  A deep breath. “Other than some morning sickness, I’m fine.”

  “Morning sickness?” he repeated. “Are you sure that’s what it is?”

  “I’m positive.”

  “Is it something to worry about?”

  “It’ll pass eventually.”

  “I hope you feel better soon.”

  That was it? She had just told him she was pregnant, and he brushed her off like she’d said she had a cold? Or did he somehow already know she was expecting? And if so, how had he figured it out, and why hadn’t he said something sooner?

  Grace paced five steps and turned when she reached the far side of the room. Was he really not going to say anything else?

  She would come back to that. She drew another deep breath. “You said you might be able to transfer to DC when you got back.”

  “Yeah,” he responded, obvious confusion in his voice. “So?”

  “Your company doesn’t have an office in Washington, DC.”

  Music came over the line but nothing else.

  “Devin, you’ve been lying to me. Why?”

  More silence. Thirty seconds passed before he finally spoke. “I really can’t talk right now. Can I call you later?”

  “It sounds like I don’t have a choice.”

  “I’m sorry, Grace,” he said, but she wasn’t sure what he was apologizing for—cutting off the call or lying in the first place. “You’re okay, though, right?”

  “Other than not knowing where we stand, I’m perfect.”

  “I’ll call you in a few days. Things are pretty crazy here right now.”

  “On a Saturday night. Right.”

  “Bye, Grace.”

  The phone disconnected, and she stared down at it. She managed to blink twice before the tears started. Her husband was lying to her, and he didn’t care that she was pregnant. What would he have said if she’d told him they were having twins? She was having twins, she corrected. At the moment, Devin was barely part of her life. The question was whether he wanted to be part of it in the future.

  Another cockroach skittered into view, and she wiped at the tears on her cheeks. The next time she talked to Devin, she was going to make it clear. She couldn’t live like this anymore.

  * * *

  Devin took a moment to compose himself before he returned to the table in the bar where he had joined Fai and several of their coworkers from Revival. He’d hated lying to Grace before, but that was nothing compared to this. Knowing he had lost her trust was killing him inside.

  The background noise had made it hard to hear her, even after he’d walked across the room so he wouldn’t be so close to the band playing in the corner. At least she hadn’t seemed too concerned about whatever sickness she had caught. Maybe it was better they weren’t still planning to meet in London after all. The last thing either of them needed was to finally see each other and have one of them feeling lousy.

  At the moment, he had the feeling lousy part perfected. He needed Grace, and this job was destroying everything he cared about.

  He pocketed his phone, his chest tight and burning from the tension running through him. At least the music was loud enough that he wouldn’t have to make much conversation. He wondered how soon he could make an excuse to leave.

  Bolin, the man directly across from him, had become a friendly acquaintance over the past two months. They were around the same age, and like Devin, he hadn’t been with Revival long. Tain, the man sitting beside Fai, was ten years Devin’s senior and tended more toward the serious side.

  “Is everything okay?” Fai asked when Devin reclaimed his seat between him and Meilin.

  “Fine.” He had barely sat down when the waiter arrived with their latest round of drinks.

  Devin picked up the nonalcoholic orange-and-strawberry juice placed in front of him, and Meilin put her hand on his arm. Devin reminded himself not to pull away. He couldn’t let things get too friendly, but he needed to look like he was single, or at least appear that he wasn’t married. And at the same time, he promised himself he would find a way to talk to Grace tomorrow.

  He would have to give Chee an ultimatum. If he was compromised anyway, it was time to let him go back to the States, back to Grace. And it was time he was allowed to tell his wife what he really did for a living.

  Bolin commented on an upcoming trip to Beijing, and Devin reminded himself of why he was here. Gathering information. He took a sip of his drink and reminded himself to act casually as the conversation continued to flow, everyone raising their
voices to compete with the music.

  Half an hour was all he could take before he decided it was time to make his exit. He moved slightly to his left, preparing to reach for his wallet. The room blurred for a moment, and Devin blinked to focus.

  He managed to pull out a few bills to pay for his part. He opened his mouth to say good-bye, and a wave of dizziness hit him.

  “Are you okay?” Fai asked.

  “Just a little dizzy.” Devin gripped the edge of the table and managed to stand. “I’ll see you all later.”

  Chapter 19

  Grace’s eyes were still swollen but finally dry when her phone rang again. She wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but at least the crying jag had seemed to overshadow her morning sickness for the time being.

  She grabbed her phone, not sure if she was ready to talk to Devin again but knowing, too, that speaking with him was the only thing that was going to make her feel better.

  “Hi, Grace. It’s your grandpa.”

  “Hi, Grandpa. How are you?” she said, relieved and disappointed at the same time.

  “Can’t complain. How’s my little girl?”

  “Pregnant.”

  “What? Did you just say you’re pregnant?”

  Grace couldn’t believe she had blurted out the truth. Maybe it was the emotional exhaustion, or maybe she needed to share the news with someone who didn’t have the word doctor before their name. “That’s right. You’re going to be a great-grandpa.”

  “Well, honey, congratulations. How are you feeling?”

  “Tired, nauseated.”

  “Your grandma was the same way with your daddy. It’ll pass.”

  “That’s what I hear.” Grace settled onto her couch, and a little ripple of excitement surfaced as she prepared to share the rest of the news. “There is something else I should tell you.”

  “What’s that?”

  “I’m having twins.”

  “Twins? I don’t know whether to congratulate you or offer my sympathy.”

  Grace chuckled. “Let’s stick with congratulations for now. You can save the sympathy for when I’m dealing with sleepless nights.”