I prepared for the worst.
She continued with caution, her voice barely above a whisper. “When you attempted suicide, that’s what happened to me, just more extreme. I mean, I know you know that. But I just wanted to remind you that as awful as that experience was, I’m grateful because I’d probably still be a jerk otherwise. It kind of woke me up. You know?”
It was too difficult for me to view that miserable moment in my life with any form of gratitude. I smiled in reply because I couldn’t think of anything to say. But as I left, the old guilt and shame from my suicide attempt and then from having the overbearing shadow Lucas attached to me bubbled up to the surface.
I shoved the feeling aside. I was a light warrior. I could handle shadows. That’s what we did.
Still, if Lucas had the power and resolve to torment both me and my family over the last few months, what would stop him from trying something again? The image of the two shadows staring at us in the bar, and then Gregory’s comment about Lucas and Donovan not leaving us alone forever flashed in my mind.
Nothing was stopping Lucas. He was just biding his time.
And I needed to be ready.
Chapter 3
“Are you serious?” I stared at Kyra in disbelief. Mr. Delaney, as we had to call him at school, wasn’t in his classroom yet. Otherwise, I would’ve looked to him for confirmation.
“Yes, I’m serious,” she laughed. “I think we should go see a movie tonight.”
Lexi, our friend who was unaware of our true identities and my non-stop training the last few weeks, eyed me with a raised eyebrow. She didn’t know that getting a break from my shadow-hunting practice, especially on the weekend when all the crazies were out, was about as probable as getting an affordable cup of coffee at Starbucks.
“Well, thank goodness.” I sighed out loud and slouched in my seat. “I so need this!” After last weekend’s fiasco and then a long week of school and after-school “lessons” from Gregory over detecting different types of shadows, I needed a break.
Lexi scrutinized me. “Um, Iris. It’s a movie.”
“Yeah, well…” I picked up my pencil and twirled it impulsively. “It’s been a rough week.”
Lexi’s tone softened. “How’s Hanna? Is she improving at all?”
Her concern immediately reopened the floodgates of my guilt. I’d been lying to Lexi. Since my training didn’t allow me to hang out with her as often, I had to come up with some excuse. I’d been telling her that my mother wanted me to hang around the house to be with my sick sister and to have family time.
It’s not like I had a choice, though. What was I going to do? Tell her that in my spare time I fought invisible shadows that hung around drunken degenerates? Besides, we weren’t supposed to burden people with such potentially dangerous knowledge.
“Hanna’s actually doing much better. She thinks she’s better than she really is, but still. It shouldn’t be much longer until she’s back to normal.” And until I was out of my usual, go-to excuse when Lexi asked to hang out.
“That’s good,” she said, but her eyes didn’t leave me. My answer hadn’t exactly given her an explanation for my “rough week.”
I shifted uncomfortably. The awkward silence that followed filled the giant chasm of deception that was pushing us apart, eroding our friendship. She must have felt the void too because she twisted around in her seat and faced the front without another word, though Mr. Delaney hadn’t come in yet.
I glanced at Kyra, who stuck out her bottom lip in a sympathetic pout. She knew all about having to keep secrets from friends. “Hey,” Kyra spoke up, breaking the tension. “Why don’t we ask Nicole and Tyler to join us? That way Patrick’s not the only guy.”
Lexi looked from Kyra to me and back to Kyra. Not exactly an affirmation of asking our former friend to hang out, but she hadn’t dismissed the idea as pointless either.
I was more pessimistic. Ever since I’d broken up with Josh and then Nicole ditched us because her boyfriend was Josh’s friend, our relationship had been rocky. Then after she and Tyler and Josh had gotten into partying but the habit didn’t stick with me, we officially had nothing in common. At least in Nicole’s eyes.
“I’ll ask, but I doubt it,” I said. “It seems like all she wants to do is hang out with Tyler alone or go to parties.” Plus, she had a shadowy parasite that would try to convince her she had better things to do. A bunch of light warriors wasn’t exactly the ideal company for a shadow. I had tried killing the parasite before. Sliced it through the middle with my prism a couple of times while she wasn’t looking. Although she seemed more friendly and willing to change for the moment, the shadow always returned by the next day.
Gregory had explained to me that even after we kill a shadow, people still have free choice and can choose to let a shadow come back. They can even choose to resist them in the first place. But when it came to my friends, I had a hard time not randomly lashing out on their slave drivers, even if doing so was pointless.
I shoved my pessimism down and slapped on a smile, however forced. “I’ll ask her in sixth hour.”
Thankfully, in the meantime, I had third hour with Patrick to help keep my mind off her inevitable rejection. My old friend not wanting to hang out with me was bad enough. Being replaced by an oppressive fog was even worse and not something I liked to dwell on.
Patrick sat in his usual seat near the back of the Family and Consumer Science room (the FACS room as we called it) looking too perfect to be anywhere but the set of a music video or photo shoot. He sat with his black casual jacket and meticulously messed-up blonde hair among tables with fabrics, patterns, and sewing machines. He appeared as out of place as Arnold Schwarzenegger in a frilly apron.
I didn’t even want to take the class. It was Gregory’s fault we were in there. He had decided we should both take the Child Development and Parenting class together where they teach how horrible childbirth and parenting are. Since we’d officially become a couple, I guess he figured the class was a not-so-subtle hint.
Not that he had to worry. I mean we were light warriors.
But, apparently, that wasn’t enough for Gregory. I understood Gregory and his intentions. I just thought the class was stupid.
When Patrick saw me, he grinned from ear to ear. Any animosity I had towards the class melted away. I would sit through anything, even if I had to take care of a fake plastic baby, just to be near Patrick.
“Hey, there’s my beautiful girlfriend.” He grinned as he said the words, and I felt like the luckiest girl in the school. I sat down beside him and scooted my chair until the seat almost touched his. “You know, if it weren’t for you, I’d have ditched this class a long time ago.”
“Actually, if it weren’t for me, you probably wouldn’t be taking this class anyway.” He smirked. “Since my presence makes you unable to control your urge to make babies.”
“Ugh!” I slammed my forehead into my palm, partly frustrated at Gregory and his “assumptions,” and partly flustered at Patrick’s unveiled reference to sex. My face grew hot.
He chuckled in amusement. “Oh, you know he means well.”
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, yeah. I know. Oh, he is letting us have a break tonight though. So I guess that kind of makes up for it...a little...okay maybe not. But I’ll definitely take the break.”
“So I heard. Looking forward to the night off.” He scooted closer to me and cleared his throat. “As a matter of fact, how about the two of us continue your temporary time off tomorrow at the mall?” He raised his eyebrows a few times with exaggerated excitement.
The prospect of finally getting some alone time with him was thrilling, but I wasn’t about to get my hopes up. I eyed him warily. “Where exactly is this sudden interest in shopping coming from? You hate the mall.”
“Well, Gregory said that we could take a break tonight, as long as tomorrow you, sort of...” he coughed into his fist as he finished, “...take a quiz.”
My eyes narrowed.<
br />
“He wants me to grade you on your discernment of what the shadows represent.”
I rolled my eyes and laughed. “Of course he does.”
He shrugged. “It shouldn’t be too bad. You’re basically just going to people watch and identify as many shadows as you can. Say their motives or the types of shadows they are.”
“Oh, is that all?”
“You’ll do fine.” He wrapped his arm around me and squeezed my shoulder. “I promise. I’ll even help. A little. Okay, maybe not.”
I smacked his leg but then settled into the crook of his shoulder. Despite the quiz, I had to admit I was looking forward to spending some one-on-one time with Patrick, even surrounded by a bunch of shadowed people I’d have to analyze. We’d been so busy lately and always with Kyra and Gregory that we hadn’t had any alone time since we’d started dating. I was pretty sure that was a strategic move on Gregory’s part. Possibly Kyra’s, too.
We had no intentions of doing anything stupid. But we were still human. And Patrick was still really hot.
The door swung open and our teacher, Mrs. Bauder, entered, followed by some girl I’d never seen. I sat up in my seat.
“Who’s that?” I could practically hear the hormones dripping from Erik’s voice. He elbowed his friend near the front of the room and pointed toward the door. There weren’t many guys in the class, but the eyes of all guys present were glued to the new girl, who was now scanning the class for a seat.
Erik’s lust for the new girl had been loud enough for her to hear, but she apparently didn’t mind. She spotted the open seat near Erik, sauntered over to it, sat down, and twisted to the aisle so her smooth legs, bare up to her black mini skirt, were in plain sight. She flashed Erik an overly flirtatious smile. I already didn’t like her.
My one hope was that Patrick had somehow not noticed. No such luck. I found him already staring. I gripped the sides of my chair and my face grew hot. She was ten times prettier than I was. I knew it. She knew it. She’d probably already sized up the class—maybe even the school—and had come to the satisfying conclusion that she was the hottest girl there. I already knew Patrick was the hottest guy at our school. I was in trouble.
I thought about saying something to Patrick, but what would I say? So, do you think the new girl’s prettier than me? Are you planning on dumping me for her? Why don’t you take a picture? It’ll last longer.
But I didn’t want to get into an argument. Class was starting anyway.
I’d hoped that once Mrs. Bauder started talking, the girl would swivel back around to face the front. Instead, she kept her model-like legs out for the hormonal Erik, and Patrick, to gawk at. A whirling, lustful shadow was already forming over Erik’s head, as well as his friend who had the same tantalizing view.
She flicked her glistening black hair off her shoulder and adjusted her lacy black bra straps so they were somewhat covered by the spaghetti straps of her top. As she uncrossed her tan legs, she pulled lotion out of her purse and poured some in her manicured hand. Instead of putting lotion on normally, though, she caressed her leg with one smooth motion all the way down to her ankle and all the way back up where her upper thigh met her skirt.
She knew she was on display and was enjoying every minute of the attention.
Knowing Patrick had just witnessed the same obscene spectacle I could never erase from my memory, I didn’t want to see his reaction. But I looked anyway. He was still staring, but, surprisingly, his expression was anything but lustful. In fact, his face wasn’t even friendly. Disgusted was a better description.
Had I underestimated Patrick? For a teenage boy to be disgusted by a girl like that was unfathomable to me.
Some of my anxiety left, but his bitter, almost vengeful countenance was confusing. Where was that coming from? What did he have against her, besides her acting like a tramp? And that was probably just a negative for me. She didn’t even have a shadow over her, which was surprising since she seemed like the type of person who wouldn’t just be tempted but who’d willingly embrace one. So he wasn’t glaring at a shadow.
I studied the two for a minute, back and forth, and eventually, the inevitable happened. I found her facing us. I quickly averted my eyes, trying to play it off as though I wasn’t creeping on my boyfriend and the new girl. I didn’t think she noticed, though, because she wasn’t looking at me. Her eyes were on Patrick.
He was still glaring at her. His narrowed eyes and tightly pressed lips gave the impression that he didn’t trust this girl as far as he could throw her. Almost like he was annoyed that he had to deal with her presence.
From the sultry look on her face, one would have thought Patrick was undressing her with his eyes as opposed to shooting invisible lasers from them. Her pouty lips spread into a wickedly seductive smile. A smile that was way too intimate for a stranger. I wanted to slap the look right off her face.
After class was over, I fiddled with my bag long enough to let the dark-haired beauty queen leave ahead of us. We got approximately ten steps out the door when I screeched to a halt in the middle of the hallway. Crossing my arms, I cleared my throat loudly enough for Patrick to realize I was no longer beside him.
At first, he wrinkled his forehead. But after a split second those wrinkles dissolved into a look of frustration. He shuffled back to me but avoided my eyes.
I was right. There was no way they were strangers.
“So are you going to tell me how you know her, or are you going to play dumb?”
He sighed and finally looked at me. “She’s a dark warrior like I used to be. That’s how I knew her. But what she’s doing here? I have no idea.”
I scrutinized him for a minute before deciding I believed him. However, his explanation did seem rather short for such a big deal. At least it was a big deal to me. Having such an attractive girl making googly eyes at my boyfriend as if he were her own personal boy toy was definitely a big deal.
But Patrick had already dismissed the conversation as not worth his time. His eyes revealed his mind was already somewhere else. Somewhere full of trouble and danger. A place he had no intentions of taking me.
* * * *
The lunchroom was overflowing with the usual chaos and chatter, but I was immune to the noise. All I could think about was what Patrick was keeping from me and why. Though he clearly disliked the new girl, the fact that there’d been any past between them whatsoever was disconcerting at best and a cause for jealous hysteria at worst.
Patrick remained silent the whole time we were in line and on the way to our table, which wasn’t helping. Still, I managed to hold myself together, at least on the outside. That is until after I’d barely sat down and nearly every boy in the cafeteria noisily clamored in his seat to get a better look at someone strutting down the aisle. I lost it.
My head immediately fell into my open palm as I squeezed my eyes shut. I’d witnessed enough disturbing images for one day. But that didn’t block out the click of high heels and excited whispers and catcalls.
Luckily, for his own safety, the guy sitting next to me kept silent.
“Who’s that?” Lexi whispered. The trace of disgust in her question made me smile.
I was about to answer Lexi myself but figured I’d at least better follow her gaze so I didn’t seem psychic. When I raised my head, though, I almost jumped at the sight, which was not at all what I’d expected.
The same girl with the same black mini skirt, pink spaghetti strap top, long, tan legs, and jet-black hair, strolled down the aisle with a smug grin. But this time she had a powerfully oppressive, dark warden hovering beside her, so close that parts of its murky silhouette slithered over her skin. They moved down the aisle together as one.
My brain couldn’t make sense of something so contradictory. I had never seen someone display so much ease and confidence while being held captive by such an overbearing shadow. As a dark warrior, she knew she was attached to the dark figure. She knew she wasn’t free. Yet she didn’t appear to care.
In fact, her attachment to the shadow seemed to be the stimulus for her self-confidence. As if there was some pride in knowing she belonged to it and it to her.
There was no doubt in my mind. This person was evil.
And she was headed straight for our table.
The last click of her heel echoed loudly in my ear, and I shivered at her proximity.
“So, I guess there’s no use pretending since I hear Patrick’s told you all about me.”
He did? She must have been referring to Patrick’s telling me she was a dark servant. Well, she was right. There was no use hiding her shadow in front of me anymore.
My confusion must’ve shown on my face before I’d realized what she meant. She stared at me as if she were amused and astonished at my stupidity. “Maybe they were wrong about you.”
And the confusion was back. “Who was wrong about what?”
Patrick seemed puzzled too but shrugged it off and rolled his eyes. “Ugh. I forgot how quickly news spreads with your little minions. Oh wait. I got that wrong, didn’t I? You all are their minions.”
I felt the strong desire to somehow associate myself with Patrick visibly. I considered grabbing him and linking my arm through his, but that seemed a bit obvious. And a bit desperate.
I settled for a snide remark. “He told me what you are. A despicable person who doesn’t even realize she’s a slave.”
She raised her eyebrows. “Oh? Is that all he mentioned? He’s holding out on you.”
What was that supposed to mean? I turned to Patrick, but his sober face didn’t offer any answers. All I could read there was hostility burning behind his eyes.
She started to leave but then angled back. “Oh, by the way, I heard you had some unwelcome company over the weekend. Two specific guests to be exact?” Her tone ended in a slight lilt as if she’d asked a question. A question to which she had the answer.
Now she had our undivided attention. I didn’t know if Kyra had seen the two shadows in the bar. I’d forgotten to mention what we’d seen. But Patrick and I definitely knew what she was referring to. Even Lexi, who was utterly lost, looked like she was waiting on pins and needles for the new girl to continue.
Luminous Spirits (Shadow Eyes Series Book 2) Page 3