Luminous Spirits (Shadow Eyes Series Book 2)

by Dusty Crabtree

  He stashed his prism back in the pocket of his hoodie and walked slowly to me. He held his arms out in front of him as if approaching a wild animal. When he reached me, he slid the cup of alcohol out of my hand and set it gently on the counter. “Iris?”

  I stared into his eyes. What had just happened? I was scared and unsure of myself, of him, of my surroundings. Then I wanted to smack myself as realization hit me. That stupid shadow had come back and had become ten times worse. Now that it was gone and I could somewhat think clearly, I knew the truth. The blurred vision and foggy mind I’d grown accustomed to with Lucas had been a little different with this shadow but much the same and brought on horrible memories. Patrick had just saved me from a second Lucas.

  I shivered at the thought. But it only took a few seconds to remember that Patrick was the reason I’d come to this party by myself and had gotten the shadow in the first place. This was all his fault.

  “Iris. I know even light warriors can have doubts and fall away. Trust me, I know. But what happened?”

  “Don’t you dare.” I gave him the most menacing glare I could produce, trying to come across as righteously enraged, but my voice quavered. “Don’t you dare talk to me about falling away.”

  He wrinkled his forehead. “What are you taking about?” He tried to step towards me, but I sunk further back along the cabinets away from him. He stopped where he was and huffed with strained patience. “I mean, I know I’ve messed up in the past, but I thought you’d come to terms with who I was before I met you.”

  “Don’t try to play dumb. That’s not what I’m talking about and you know it. I saw you with Lila in the commons yesterday.”

  And so it was out. We were going to have this conversation right in the middle of Mike’s kitchen. Or so I thought.

  His eyes narrowed in confusion at first. But something must have clicked because they flew wide open, along with his mouth. In the end, he simply sighed and took me by the elbow. “Come on. We’re not talking about this here.”

  I was suddenly aware of my surroundings. People around us were staring and whispering to each other. He was right. Not here. I allowed him to drag me back through the living room and out the door, but not before I caught a glimpse of Lila. She sat on the same couch with her posse, her mouth half open in an amused gasp. Her expression came across so overbearingly conceited I wanted to smack the look right off her face.

  Only when we reached Patrick’s car did Patrick finally let go of my arm to unlock the passenger side door. He opened it and waited. What was that? Was he trying to be all chivalrous now? Was he trying to suck up to me? Because that crap wasn’t going to work. I plopped down into the seat but made sure to shut my own door. Once he got in, he started the car to get the heat going, and I waited for him to speak first.

  Patrick didn’t look at me right away as he began his speech. There was a forced calmness about his posture and tone. “Okay, first of all, what you saw with Lila was not what it looked like. And second of all, I should’ve told you what I was doing beforehand so we wouldn’t have gotten into this mess. So I truly am sorry about that.”

  He let out a loud breath. Apparently, his forced calmness came out with it. He pitched his head back against the headrest and squeezed his eyes shut with a groan, “Why didn’t I listen to Gregory? He told me to tell you, but...I didn’t listen. I just...I thought...I don’t know...I guess...”

  “Patrick,” I cut him short. “You seem to forget that I have no idea what you’re talking about. So unless you want me to keep thinking you’re a cheating, lying jerk, you’re going to have to explain to me what you and Gregory planned that you didn’t feel the need to tell me about. I can’t promise I won’t still think you’re a lying jerk. But I’m guessing since Gregory was involved you have an explanation for the cheating part.”

  I waited with bated breath for him to answer my implied question.

  A strange laugh escaped his lips before he practically yelled, “Of course I do. Do you really think I would cheat on you? I would never do that.” He stared at me incredulously and then scrunched up his face in disgust. “Not even that. Do you honestly think I would even, for once, consider getting with Lila?”

  “Well...I knew you didn’t like her. But...” I shifted my gaze to my hands resting limply in my lap. “You are a guy, and she’s the prettiest girl at our school. Besides, I thought maybe you wanted to be with someone who...had more experience.”

  “Are you kidding me with this? Iris, you don’t get it. I’m not like that anymore. Plus, she disgusts me just as much as she does you. Actually, more so because I know her better. Trust me, there is no comparison between you two.”

  I wasn’t entirely convinced. “But all the other guys fall for her.”

  “That’s because they don’t know her like I do. They haven’t seen how wicked and heartless she can be. She’s got them all fooled. It’s sad really. I don’t know what’s worse, though, that or you thinking I wanted to be with her.”

  My eyes brimmed with tears. Tears of embarrassment. Tears of anger. All my pent up emotions came barreling to the surface, and I shoved Patrick’s chest with as much force as I could muster. His shoulder hit the door, but if I’d hurt him, he didn’t show it. Which made me even more mad.

  “What did you expect, huh? What was I supposed to think when I saw her all over you? I heard you tell her you missed being a dark servant and that you were thinking about getting back with her. And then I saw you flirting with her in third hour before I showed up. But when you saw me you suddenly pretended she didn’t exist. You tell me what I was supposed to think! You have no idea what I’ve been through in the last twenty four hours, so don’t try to tell me what’s sad!”

  The tears were in full force by the time I’d finished my rant. Patrick looked so hurt you’d have thought I’d broken up with him. He put his hand on my leg, but when I flinched, he removed his hand. “Iris, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to make this worse by saying that. I just wish you could see she’s got nothing on you.” He shook his head. “But you’re right. Of course you would’ve thought that after seeing what you did. And it’s all my fault for being an idiot. Ugh! I just should have told you beforehand.”

  “Told me what, Patrick? Remember me? The girl who knows nothing yet?”

  “Right. Okay, let me start from the beginning.” He kept his tone calm and collected and his eyes focused on his dashboard as he explained. “Gregory and I had talked about how we needed to get more information from Lila. We still didn’t know why she was here or what she was planning. But we weren’t getting anywhere. So he thought up a plan that would have two different angles to get that information. We both knew Lila still liked me. Gregory’s idea was for me to pretend that I liked her and that I was thinking about becoming a dark servant again. He thought I might be able to get her to talk. But yesterday when you saw us in the commons, I was also keeping her at school so Gregory and Kyra could snoop around her bedroom and on her computer.”

  I paused and let that sink in for a minute. As difficult as it was, I attempted to shift my view of the events over the last twenty-four hours. “So, this was Gregory’s idea?”

  “Well, yeah, but don’t get mad at him. He told me I should tell you the plan. Actually...” He looked down. “He and Kyra both did.”

  “And why didn’t you?”

  “I guess I was just afraid that if I told you, you would say I couldn’t do it because you couldn’t stand the thought of me flirting with Lila. Or you would say you were fine but then you wouldn’t be able to handle me actually going through with the plan and blow my cover or something.” He averted his eyes from my piercing glare.

  “So, what you’re saying is you didn’t trust me.”

  He moaned as he exhaled. “Well, when you put it like that it sounds horrible.”

  “Yeah. It does because it is.”

  He breathed in and out once more and then turned to me. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have kept you in the dark. I shou
ld’ve trusted you with this. After tonight, seeing what you’ve been through...believe me. I’ve learned my lesson. I wasn’t right to not trust you. And I don’t ever want to put you through this again.”

  I still believed him not trusting me was a jerk move, but part of me wondered if his worries had any validity. I played in my mind how the scenario might’ve gone down if he’d told me about the plan before going through with it. Would I have been okay with what he’d have to do? Or would I have been the overbearing and jealous girlfriend that puts her own insecurities over something potentially beneficial to everyone?

  My practice empathizing with strangers must have helped me empathize with my boyfriend. Because as much as what he’d done hurt me, somehow I could see his side. I knew myself. I’d forgotten how well he knew me too.

  “Okay, I’m not saying that what you did was right, by any means. But, I guess I can see where you were coming from. A little bit,” I added upon seeing his mouth start to spread into a smile. “Did you guys end up finding anything anyway?” Hopefully my anguish hadn’t been all for nothing.

  “Yeah, we found some things but nothing to really help us much. There was some information about both of us like random things from our past, siblings, past addresses. She also had stuff on our friends and Josh, and there were some e-mails that mentioned Donovan. She mentioned Donovan to me, too, while we were talking. She said he was here lurking around somewhere. Very vague. She’s being careful.”

  “Wait, so how did they get all that stuff from her computer? Doesn’t she have passwords?”

  Patrick chuckled. “Gregory’s got some mad angel hacker skills.”

  I laughed at the absurdity of such a statement, and Patrick joined in, probably thankful the mood had lightened.

  But that light-heartedness was short-lived. “Oh, we found something else in those e-mails. We were going to tell you tonight but you never showed up. Gregory wanted to tell you this morning, but I told him to wait since…” He lowered his gaze for a second. “Since I hadn’t told you about Lila yet.”

  Part of me wanted to be mad that Patrick’s deceit had also kept important information from me. But the other part of me was scared to hear this new information. Not that I had a choice.

  “There were some e-mails to some dark warriors in Indianapolis. They mentioned Lucas.”

  My eyes flew wide open. “Lucas? Why would she be talking about Lucas?”

  Patrick’s face softened sympathetically. “We’re not sure. The emails were vague. But our best guess is that Lucas and Donovan are working together. Why else would Lila be in contact with both of them?”

  Sitting back in my seat again, I let that information settle for a moment. “Wow. I don’t know what to say. I mean, all this time, we thought they were after us separately, which sucked. But now they’re working together to get us? That’s just scary.”

  “Yeah, but if they are, they must be working behind the scenes since none of us have actually seen them together. Separately, at some of our shadow hunts, but never together. It’s just a theory…” Though he trailed off, I knew what he was implying.

  “But the only one that makes sense.”

  We sat quietly, thinking, and the silence weighed heavily around us. Eventually Patrick lifted his hand to brush my cheek with his fingers. My mind was still stuck on Lucas, but apparently Patrick’s had moved on. “Iris, you do know how sorry I am about the whole Lila thing, right? I never thought you would find out like that, much less that it would drive you to where I found you. I should’ve been honest with you up front. I should’ve trusted you.”

  I peered into his eyes and allowed their sadness to help adjust how I saw him. I’d gone over twenty-four hours thinking of Patrick as a cheating, lying scumbag that had broken my heart. It was taking some effort to put back together the pieces of the image I’d once had of him. The image that was truly him after all. But I was getting there.

  I took his hand and let it rest between us, watching as my fingers brushed over his palm. When I finally raised my head to speak, I was confident my words would be sincere. “Yes, I do know how sorry you are. And I forgive you.”

  I squeezed his hand, hoping my forgiveness would sink in. “Hey, you’re still amazing in my book. You rescued me before I did anything too stupid.” I remembered how he’d saved me from the foggy mass that had formed above me. “How did you get your aura to be so strong and bright anyway?”

  “I honestly don’t know. I mean, I guess auras can get brighter as our emotions get more intense. All I know is when I found you there in the kitchen, with that shadow over you... I just knew I had to protect you from that leech.” Patrick stared into my eyes so intently I almost wanted to look away, but I didn’t. “Iris, you mean everything to me. I know I screwed that up, but I don’t ever want to be without you.”

  And you love me? Right then would’ve been the perfect time for him to say the words. But with a speech so heartfelt and genuine, I couldn’t complain. I sighed and closed my eyes as a weight suddenly pressed on my chest. That weight had burdened me for a week but I’d pretended it didn’t exist. Patrick had basically confessed everything and then poured his heart out to me. The least I could do was the same.

  “Patrick, I need to tell you something.” I pulled back my hand, took a deep breath, and inspected my lap. “I had lunch last Saturday with Josh while you were at David’s funeral. Nothing happened, but he told me he had feelings for me.”

  I glanced up to judge his reaction, but his face didn’t change. He simply breathed in and breathed out as if he were literally taking it all in.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” I continued. “I was just having such a hard time dealing with all the news about your past. Not that I’m trying to put my actions all on you. It was just hard hearing about the girls you’d slept with and then about the people you’d helped turn into addicts. I know you’ve changed, and I know you’re different. But, for a while there, I just felt like I didn’t know you anymore.”

  As he nodded, he worked his tongue around in his mouth and then stared at his lap. “Do you still feel that way?”

  “No, not at all. I mean, the whole thing with Lila didn’t help much, but up until then I was actually coming to terms with your past.”

  “And what do you think about Josh? Do you have feelings for him too?” He remained calm with his head down, but there was a softness in his voice that broke my heart.

  It was hard, but I needed to be honest with him. “I don’t think so. I mean, I considered what he said for a second, but then I realized I could never leave you. I want Josh to be happy, yes. It kills me that he’s hurt because I don’t want to be with him. But your happiness means so much more to me than that. If there’s one thing I’ve figured out through all of this, it’s that you don’t have to worry about me leaving you for him. I could never do that to you. Or to me.”

  He took a deep breath and then looked me in the eyes. “Okay.”

  “Seriously? How can you be so understanding?”

  “When you say you would never leave me for him, I believe you. Besides, I don’t exactly have room to judge when I went behind your back with something as huge as fraternizing with the enemy, now do I?”

  I smirked. “I guess you have a point.” I thought for a second. “So, does that mean we’re even?”

  He laughed. “I’d like to think of it as we’re both forgiven. Ready to start fresh.” He lowered his head and peered into my eyes. “If that’s okay with you.”

  I grinned. “I think I can manage that. No more secrets?”

  “No more secrets,” he said. “And you’ll try to have more faith in me?”

  “Of course.” I smiled again and then sighed. “I guess we both have our own trust issues, huh?”

  He smiled back but then didn’t drop his gaze. It felt like he was searching my eyes in order to see every part of me. Including the stuff deep down I had always tried to hide. And, to my surprise, whatever he saw made him smile.
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  He leaned toward me and touched my cheek with his free hand. As he drew nearer, his gaze drifted back and forth between my mouth and my eyes. Finally, our lips met. And it was such a tender kiss, such a genuinely affectionate kiss, that I pulled him closer for more. This was right. Our relationship, with all its dysfunction but also newfound honesty, was right. I smiled on his lips, and then lay the side of my head on his shoulder.

  We sat like that, in each other’s arms, for several minutes. Neither one of us wanted to call it a night and head home. But the peace and certainty we finally had in our relationship made the parting easier. Everything was fine between us, and we would see each other tomorrow. There were no doubts or worries about that.

  I pulled the handle and propped the door open. As the purr of the engine floated through the car, I leaned back for one more kiss.

  “Oh,” Patrick stopped me before I left. “I’ll tell Lila the next time I hear from her that I decided to stay with you and the light warriors.”

  I scrunched up my nose. “You probably can’t tell her the whole thing was a lie, can you?”

  He shook his head. “No, I can’t. If she knew that, she’d get suspicious. We don’t want her to know we’re starting to figure her out.”

  I nodded. “Of course. I guess I can handle keeping that part a secret.” I pushed open the door and set one foot on the pavement. “It would have been kind of fun to see her reaction to that news though.” I laughed as I finished stepping out of the car.

  He chuckled. “I agree. Trust me.”

  I turned around to peek into his car and met his eyes one last time. “The great thing is...I do.”

  * * * *

  When I got to my house there was a strange car in the driveway. With all the night’s drama, I’d forgotten about my mom’s date with Robert. Was that his car? That had to be a good sign, right?

  The night she’d “bumped into” him had been the day I’d seen Patrick with Lila. I hadn’t been in the mood to talk then. Now that I could think straight, I was actually excited to meet this guy Gregory had raved about.