Okay, that didn’t sound so bad. Yell and scream for a few minutes bad, but definitely not break up bad. I had a sneaking suspicion Jace was holding back some critical information—the missing piece of the puzzle.
“What else did you say?” I asked, trying to sound threatening.
“Okay, so that’s the part I didn’t want to tell you. I said something stupid that I totally didn’t mean. I told her…I…should have, um, hooked up withyouinstead.” He said this last part so fast, the words blended together and I had to think for a minute before it dawned on me. Jace was an idiot.
I tried to block out all the thoughts swirling through my head at that moment and focus on solutions. What ifs wouldn’t solve anything, but it was hard not to consider the implications of what Jace admitted. Rachel had obviously considered the deeper meanings of Jace’s statement, causing her not only to stop speaking to Jace, but to me as well.
It was the first time my crush on Jace had been openly acknowledged, and I blushed in remembrance of the way I’d felt for him all those months ago. On the flip side of that comment, however, was the possibility that at one time Jace might have felt the same way about me. If only I’d known at the time, I might have pushed a little harder, but none of that mattered now. Rachel and Jace were together and they were perfect for each other. They had an undeniable connection which went beyond ordinary love.
I’d found happiness with Bryce. He was everything I never knew I wanted until I had him. Or something like that. I knew what I meant. Bryce and I had forged a more traditional bond—a relationship based originally on loathing that evolved into friendship and love. I didn’t regret for a moment that things turned out the way they did.
No wonder Rachel chose to avoid Jace. He’d hit a nerve and played on her insecurities.
“Let’s go,” I said. “We’re going to Rachel’s so you two can make up.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” he replied, recoiling from my outstretched hand.
“When’s the last time you talked to her?” I asked.
“I talk to her every day. On the phone, though,” he admitted. “Her mind is blocked, so I can’t talk to her that way anymore.”
This was serious. Clearly, there was something going on with Rachel, something more upsetting than Jace’s foolish comments.
“Don’t you want to talk to her? Don’t you miss her?” I pushed. “Jace, you can’t just let your relationship fall apart without even trying.” Every second he sat on that sofa represented an additional moment I had to spend away from my beloved computer. I had no time for Jace or his self-pity.
“She’s coming over tomorrow night for dinner. Dad’s friend has some information about her father. Rachel asked me to leave her alone until then. One phone call a day is all I get. I feel like I’m in jail.”
Well, this was news to me. I felt excluded for about a second, but reminded myself that news about Rachel’s father was none of my business. I couldn’t expect to be included in everything, could I? Besides, my computer would be lonely if I was away for too long.
“Jace, I’ll give you until tomorrow. Maybe this information about her dad will ease her mind. If ya’ll can’t work things out though, I’m going over there. She’s my friend and it hurts to think she has the wrong impression about us. I’m afraid if you leave it too long, you won’t be able to mend your relationship. Tick, tock, Jace.” I hated to pressure him, but time was critical. The longer they were apart, the less likely it would be that they would resolve their differences.
“Okay,” Jace agreed. “Oh, and thanks, Alisa. I’m glad you came by.”
I left Jace with a worried Jerica, and drove back to the relative serenity of my home. I missed my computer. It beckoned. After lying to my parents and telling them I’d already eaten, I rushed upstairs to my room. I had become strange and reclusive since school ended. I spent much of my time alone in the dark, the eerie blue glow of the computer screen my only companion.
But I wasn’t alone…not really. Bryce was with me, if not in person, then in spirit. Our conversations over the internet were my only link to reality these days, and I often wondered if it would turn out that this was all a dream. I feared I would wake up one day to discover it had all been a product of my rich and vivid imagination. Or worse, that Bryce would come home and say he’d changed his mind. That a silly, sheltered, high school girl was not what he’d been looking for after all. I pushed all of these negative thoughts out of my head and focused on the email waiting for me.
Alisa,
I’m trying to count the hours until I see you, but after the week I’ve had, I don’t have enough brain power to count past ten. As much as I’m looking forward to my flight home, I’m worried about you. Once I board the plane, I won’t be able to contact you. Can you survive an entire day without emailing me? It seems all you do nowadays is sit in front of the computer. Not that I’m complaining.
Love,
Bryce
My smart-aleck response was as follows:
Bryce,
Why do you assume that I sit in front of the computer all day? My cats take turns handling my correspondence so I may lay in the sun working on my tan. As for being able to survive a day without hearing from you, I’ve done it before as you well know. I plan to use our time apart to bake chocolate chip cookies by the dozens. If you’re mean to me, I won’t save any for you.
Love,
Alisa
Despite the attack on Rachel, her falling out with Jace, and the fact that it would be beyond awkward when I finally saw her again, this was the best summer ever. I was completely in love. And that overshadowed everything.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Rachel
The reason I’d been avoiding Jace had nothing to do with my insecurities over his relationship with Alisa. Yes, it was a blow to my ego to hear him openly acknowledge that he’d once liked Alisa as more than a friend, even if it was before Jace and I got together. My female vanity insisted that Jace should have loved me and only me from the moment we first met. In reality, of course, it was perfectly acceptable for Jace to have had other love interests before we became an item. After all, I was dating Robert when Jace and I first met. Everyone had a past.
I repeatedly tried to reassure him that I no longer cared about his insensitive barb about choosing Alisa. It was an ill-considered comment, nothing more. I had reacted badly at the time and felt ashamed for carrying on like a drama queen. Had the attack not happened immediately following our argument, Jace and I probably would have made up within a day or two.
When I tried to explain to Jace that my recent silence had nothing to do with him, I meant it. Until I could figure out how to bring up the subject of Re’Vel and my dreams, I was afraid to open up my link to Jace. But that wasn’t the only reason I shut down our link. I’d had to put up a block against all magic, both incoming and outgoing. It was my only way to ensure that Re’Vel could not access my dreams. As an added precaution, I barely slept.
I couldn’t tell Jace why I closed our link, so he just assumed I didn’t want to speak with him. I hated that he believed this. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt him.
My entire life had become defined by the secrets I carried inside. My dream relationship with Re’Vel, the secrets I kept from my mother, the use of Persuasion on her: all of these secrets had taken something from me.
I could perhaps excuse my interactions with Re’Vel. I believed at the time it was happening that I was dreaming, and that Re’Vel wasn’t real. I didn’t know he was a Demon, otherwise I would not have allowed him access to my mind.
I might have been able to explain away the use of Persuasion on my mother. The first time I used Persuasion on her, it was to convince her to take me home to get my necklace—a matter of life or death. This time, I’d used it to keep her from panicking.
As for telling the truth about my magic, I believed it was necessary for my protection and hers. I wasn’t ready to tell her the truth about me, and she wasn’t
ready to hear it. My mother was strict in her practice of religion. She believed anything paranormal or supernatural was evil. She didn’t even like the use of magic in fairy tales. How could I ever tell her I was a Spellbringer? How could I expect her to accept that aspect of my life if I couldn’t accept it myself? I still hadn’t come to terms with who I was. The idea of explaining it to her brought all my doubts about my magic to the surface.
But these were just excuses. I had to come clean about Re’Vel. It wasn’t fair to the Alexanders to keep it a secret when I’d promised to tell them everything. And now that I knew he wasn’t a figment of my imagination, I had to tell them for the sake of their safety and protection. I just didn’t know how.
Today was the day of reckoning, the day I would reveal my secret to the Alexanders. Abe’s private investigator friend was supposed to be coming to dinner to fill us in on the research he’d been conducting about my father. I hoped he would be able to clear up some doubts I had about my origin. And I hoped once my questions were answered, I would discover my father was the man I’d always thought he was. Until the mystery concerning my father was cleared up, my sense of self hung in the balance.
Jace called me a few hours before I was supposed to come to his house and meet their guest. He gently reminded me that I should try not to be alone and asked if he could pick me up. He sounded so sad, so unsure of us, I felt even guiltier than before, a feat which I hadn’t thought possible. My continued silence and rejection had broken him, and his voice sounded empty and lost.
“I would love for you to pick me up. I can’t wait to see you.” I hesitated a second before continuing. It wasn’t fair for me to lead him on and then break his heart all over again when he found out the truth about me. I couldn’t help it, though. I had to say what was in my heart before it burst. “I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too,” he replied. “You can come over anytime, you know. I can pick you up now if you want. Dad’s friend won’t be there until later, but you can hang out with me.” His words gushed forth in his excitement. I thought for a minute before answering.
“Give me about an hour, Jace. I need to get ready. I’ll see you then?” As much as I wanted to keep my distance, I couldn’t. I just couldn’t be without him. Our link, the one I’d severed a week ago was more than just a line of communication. It was a bond, emotionally, spiritually, almost physically. We became one. As much as I hated to admit it, I didn’t feel whole without him.
I hoped an hour would give me enough time to get ready. My hair was a hideous mess and needed to be tamed before leaving the house. I carefully selected an outfit, chuckling at the stupidity of caring about my appearance when so much was at stake. I deliberately skipped the application of eye makeup because I was fairly certain tears could be expected in my immediate future.
When Jace pulled into the driveway, I began shaking all over. The need to be with him was so strong, it was overpowering. Thank God my mother wasn’t home, because I couldn’t have endured the tedious ritual of her small talk with Jace. I was out the door and in his arms before he made it halfway across the driveway. His initial shock was quickly replaced by elation. He hugged me with a ferocity that matched my own. Our kisses were desperate, filled with a mixture of love, relief, apology and joy.
To my surprise, our link was as strong as ever. The instant we touched, his emotions rushed into me with shocking intensity. I released my pent up magic, letting it flow through him. A week’s worth of tension and heartache was alleviated the moment I removed the block.
“We can’t ever let this happen again,” he whispered against my neck. “Never.”
“I know. Never again,” I replied, my tears beginning to flow. Jace drew back gently and led me to the passenger seat of the truck, helping me in. As soon as he shut the door, I leaned my head against the back of the seat, sighing with relief.
Jace drove carefully, silently, watching for any signs of Hunters. I had some serious thinking to do. The way I saw it, I had two choices. I could shut down my link to Jace once again, effectively blocking Re’Vel from my dreams. I could still keep my secret. This option hadn’t worked out very well so far. Re’Vel was gone for now, but the separation from each other was killing Jace and me.
Option two involved spilling my guts to Abe and Jerica and asking them for help. This option was risky, to say the least. I risked alienating the entire family, including Jace. How would they react to my admission of evil? How long would they tolerate me if they knew the truth? My evil was so strong, I attracted Demons in my dreams.
I spent the afternoon with Jace, talking very little, but feeling closer to him than I ever had. Despite the secrets I had yet to reveal, I relaxed for the first time in days. It was hard to keep my eyes open now that I’d finally let my guard down. I struggled to stay awake, my fear of seeing Re’Vel in my dreams the only thing that kept me conscious.
“Why don’t you take a nap? I’ll wake you up before dinner,” Jace offered. It was so, so tempting.
“No matter what, don’t let me fall asleep. I’ll explain later. I promise. After dinner, I’ll tell you everything. There’s a reason I blocked you, and it had absolutely nothing to do with you.”
His forehead creased with concern. “Rachel, please. You can’t say something like that and not tell me what’s going on. That’s not fair.”
I wanted so badly to give in. “I promise I’ll tell you later. I only want to say it once, so I want to wait until your mom and dad are around to hear it,” I explained.
“You don’t have to say anything. Just open your mind.” He reached out and caressed my cheek, and I almost gave into him. He made it even more difficult to temper my flow of thoughts when his lips crashed down on mine. His mouth traveled a fiery path down my neck, and I finally pushed him away when I heard a car door slam outside.
“We’ll continue this later?” he asked.
I nodded in response, not quite trusting myself to speak. Would we continue our conversation later, or would our relationship be irreparably changed after my heritage was revealed? Only time would tell.
***
If I hadn’t been so anxious to hear about my father, I would have enjoyed Albert’s stories. He’d certainly led an interesting life, changing careers with a frequency that boggled the mind. I wondered how he and Abe had formed such an enduring friendship. They seemed so different. With Abe’s dark skin and football-player physique, he was the opposite of his slightly-built, rapidly balding, pale, unintimidating friend.
Abe and his buddy spent dinner catching up on all the latest gossip in the magical world. Over coffee and dessert, they reminisced about the days of their youth. Abe and Albert met during their first year at the Warrior Training Bureau. Albert looked like a very unlikely candidate for that type of work, but apparently back in the day, young men were automatically expected to follow in their father’s footsteps. That first day of training, Abe took him under his wing, but Albert didn’t last long. By the end of his first year, he’d already decided to transfer to the Watcher training facility on the other side of Central.
Albert completed his training to become a Watcher, but was never able to settle into an assignment. He quit while he was still a Novice. Over the years, he’d auditioned many careers including research assistant, interpreter, and computer programmer. He finally opened a detective agency in the private sector, taking occasional assignments from those in the magical community. The idea of working with a private detective seemed kind of sleazy, but if Abe trusted him, that was good enough for me.
Some of Albert’s stories were so interesting, I got caught up for a brief period of time and enjoyed myself. But the majority of that long dinner, I just wanted to tell him to get on with it and tell me what he’d learned about my father.
After dinner, Jerica, Abe, Albert, and I gathered in the living room while Jace quickly cleared the table. Jerica flinched when Jace made some particularly loud crashing sounds in the kitchen. He didn’t want to miss any
thing, so he was trying to work at lightning speed. Minutes later, he emerged from the kitchen and sat down on the loveseat next to me.
My breathing came in anxious gasps. For a moment, I was tempted to tell Abe to forget about it, that I didn’t really want to know what Albert had to say. Jace whispered in my mind, begging me to calm down. Seconds ticked by as Albert gathered up his notes, but it felt like a lifetime of waiting.
Albert was all business when he began speaking. “Well, Abe, this was an interesting case. When you first approached me, I thought it would be a breeze, but I’ll tell you, I had a hard time unraveling this one.”
Clearly, he relished the idea of dragging it out, increasing the suspense. I barely resisted the urge to rip the notes out of his hand and read the results of his inquiry myself.
Spellbound (Spellbringers Book 1) Page 24