by L. P. Dover
“Do not lay this on me, Mom.”
“I am only telling you that after you ran away we decided to do it, for all of our sakes, and that is when I started sleeping with Marty.”
“Marty the meat man?” Rose asked her as she shook her head and Mom looked at her.
“Butcher, not meat man. You make it sound barbaric.”
I rubbed my forehead as if I may be having a breakdown as Cody continued to drink until it was gone. He set it down and said nothing.
“So let me get this right, I ran away, then you two ended your marriage, Dad stayed here and you started boning Marty?” I said as my voice went up an octave.
Cody smiled as he looked down into his lap as Rose, Daisy and Violet looked at me.
“Really, Jazz? Boning, for Christ's sake,” Rose said and I rolled my eyes.
“Oh, you can say meat man, but I can’t say boning?”
“I was not being disrespectful,” she said as she leaned back and I laughed.
“He was fucking that girl at the post office…. Betty, the one with the large breasts,” Mom said.
“I will not, I can’t listen to this stuff.” Daisy finally said as she stood up. Mom looked up at her and shook her head.
“We are all adults here, Daisy.”
“Really, are we?” she asked as she stormed off. I sat there feeling dizzy from the insanity of it all.
“That is two f-bombs from you, Mom, in less than 10 minutes. I may pass out,” I said as Cody stood up.
“Wine?” he asked.
Everyone ignored him as he walked towards the kitchen.
“This is complete bullshit, Mom, I mean, ten years?” Violet said and Mom looked at her.
“You are getting a divorce Violet, do not try to be condescending to me.”
“Nice,” Violet said as she stood up and stormed off leaving me and Rose staring at each other.
“I can’t, I mean, really Mom?” Rose said as she stood up and I watched her go. Cody stepped back into the room, as it was just me and Mom now. He held the bottle up and Mom held her glass out to the side. I lifted mine too, it was time for a drink, hell, it was time for the whole damn bottle.
Good Kisser
I LAY ON my bed. My feet up behind me, laying on my stomach as I had so many times before when I lived at home. I had my dad’s old picture in front of me and I placed my fingers to the glass and felt it all cold to the touch. I jumped slightly as a light knock came to my door. I slid from the bed and walked to my door, opening it up to see Cody standing in the hallway. He smiled at me and waved his toothbrush at me.
“I need toothpaste.”
“Oh,” I said as I left my door open and walked back to my suitcase. It lay open on the floor. I did not even bother to take anything out of it. Maybe that was my way of making this go faster. I rummaged through my things until I found my toothpaste and pulled it out. I stood up and he was in my room. I held it up and smiled at him.
“Here.”
He stepped up and took it from me, but he hesitated and then decided to speak. I should have known it was really not about the toothpaste with him.
“That was some heavy stuff.”
I rubbed my neck and then nodded as I crossed my arms on my chest. He grinned at me.
“You do realize you do that when you don’t want to talk about something.”
I relaxed and let my arms rest at my sides, all awkward.
“I don’t…I mean, maybe I do. I don’t know. What is with you analyzing people?”
He stood there and tapped the toothpaste on the side of his leg.
“I guess it is just a genetic thing.”
I sat down on my bed and stared at him. “Genetic?”
“My mom was a psychiatrist.”
I shook my head. “Great, I mean no disrespect to her, but this is the house that crazy built. You will have plenty of fun here.”
He stared at me and lowered the toothbrush and paste in his hands. He walked to my bed and sat down next to me as I tried to ignore him, but he smelled amazing and I was not in my right mind.
“You know, children of divorce have a hard time connecting with people and even though they never told you, or any of your sisters, you still felt the change and it effected you, all of you.”
I narrowed my eyes and turned on the bed as I stared at him.
“Listen, Cody. I get that you want to help me, I do, but I just can’t do this, this thing you are trying to do with me. I know it sounds shitty and I wish that I…”
His lips pressed against my own, shutting me up as he needed to. My eyes closed and all I could think about was how soft his lips were. How good he smelled and how nice it was to feel someone this close to me. Even someone that I did not really know. He lifted his hand and touched my face. His fingertips gently brushing against my skin. I stopped breathing as his tongue slid inside of my mouth and, for a moment, I was consumed with only thoughts of him. His eyes, his lips…how he smelled and his touch. We started to lean back and he moaned, deep in the back of his throat as I reached out and slid my hands under his shirt. His skin warm, his muscles tight and inviting me in. He suddenly stopped and leaned back from me as I opened my eyes and stared at him. He stood up and shook his head.
“Oh my God. You know what? I am sorry, that was crazy, I had no right to do that and I just…I gotta go brush my teeth and stuff, I can’t…I am so sorry, Jasmine.”
I was half out of breath and stood up, swaying on my feet a little bit. His kiss had made me light headed. “Cody.”
He hurried out as I stood there by my bed and slowly reached up with one hand to my lips. My fingers gently touching where he had been. The traces that he left behind on me haunting me well into the night.
I SAT AT the table with a blank look on my face. Mom had insisted on breakfast for everyone and I tried to pull my “coffee only” routine, but she ignored me. Not that I was surprised at all by it. I glanced up and saw Cody sitting there, picking at his plate and I leaned up and grabbed my fork. Mom glanced at him and then to me.
“You should take Cody to see the flower garden today.”
I took a breath and cut the sausage on my plate, which smelled amazing, by the way. I slipped a small piece into my mouth and chewed to avoid speaking. The kiss had thrown me, more that I needed it to. She leaned back and then continued on.
“Cody, the garden is something my family started in this town back in the early 1900’s. It is a staple and has served as a beautiful spot for many a marriage ceremony, including my own and Violet's.”
Violet shook her head. “Yeah, that worked out well.”
“I am sorry that you are so bothered by what we did, but your dad and I felt it was the best for everyone.”
“How would I know that?” she asked and then continued on as she often did when she was aggravated. “I mean, Dad is gone, he can’t say anything about it, now can he?”
Mom slammed her hand on the table and everyone jumped a little bit, except for Cody. He slid some sausage into his mouth and chewed, trying to ignore it all. I leaned back and watched as Violet went into defensive mode.
“Seriously, it is not about you, Mom,” She said as she stood up and my mom’s eyes remained locked on hers.
“Violet, I do understand that you are not yourself because of your situation, but in my house you will treat me with respect and speak of your dad kindly, or you are welcome to go home.”
Violet stood there and then sat back down very slowly. It was not something I had not seen before. Mom had often told us exactly how it would be and it was something you accepted or you were welcome to go elsewhere.
“I am sorry,” she said as she looked at her plate and then she started to cry. Mom stood up and walked over to her, she placed the back of her hand to her cheek as Violet laid her own hand over Mom’s. She closed her eyes and Mom looked around the table.
“I miss him, just because we ended our marriage did not mean that I did not love him as a friend, a man who always stood
by me, even in divorce, and he did give me my garden of you children. All of you named after the most beautiful flowers in the world to me. All I ever wanted was a family and he gave me that, so I never hated him, I never disrespected him, but what you need to understand is that it took two of us to do this. Two of us to create all of you and two of us to make this house a home.”
I looked down and then glanced over at Cody as he watched her. His eyes glossy, as everyone’s were.
“Mom, why don’t you go out in your garden, we can clean up here,” I said and she grinned at me. She nodded and Violet looked up at her and nodded.
“Okay, then afterward, I suggest that everyone go out and enjoy the day. Tomorrow is the funeral and it will not be easy.”
She left us all sitting there in silence. Her words carried the weight needed to stop the bickering and bitterness. I felt a bit ashamed that I was worried about how I would feel being here, truth was, I felt at home, as I always had. Regardless of the fact that my sisters were different than I was, regardless of everything. It was home and Mom was right, they had provided it in abundance, even carrying on as if things were normal for our sakes.
I stood up and grabbed my plate, one by one, the rest of them did too and we all helped clear the table. Once the dishes were done, I looked at Cody. I reached out and took his hand, not afraid to show him a bit of affection and we left the house and headed for the center of town and the “garden” my mom had mentioned to us.
We stopped and looked up at the large black wrought iron gates. Green ivy wound its way through every bar, the pungent smell of flowers wafting over both of us. I closed my eyes as a cool breeze carried the sweet aroma on the wind. I felt Cody’s grip tighten on my hand and I looked at him. He stared past the gates as if his memory was jolted. I spoke to him as his head quickly turned, allowing his face to light up with a beam of sunlight that rained down through the clouds.
“Cody, you don’t have to stay here. I mean, I appreciate you coming with me, saving me the initial brunt of my sisters, but honestly, this is not your problem. This is my mine and I just…” He turned to me and pulled my hand up to his chest. I watched as his free hand covered our hands.
“I wouldn’t dream of leaving,” he said very quietly. I stared into his blue eyes. He looked sincere, as sincere as anyone could be. I parted my lips, ready to concede, but cautiously choosing my words.
“I just don’t know why…why me? Why did you even come with me?”
He grinned and leaned in closer to my face. “You really suck at noticing when someone likes you, Jazz.”
I blinked as the wind blew my hair up around my face and his eyes never broke their gaze on my own. I wanted so badly to lean in and feel his lips against mine again. I wanted for him to hold me close, to feel his body against me. My fingertips hummed as he leaned forward and then a familiar voice broke the moment in two.
“Jasmine?”
We both turned as I saw her walking towards me. Her being my first girlfriend, so to speak. We had never gone all the way, but the kissing and groping had occurred for over a year, my junior year in high school.
“Jess?” I said as I let Cody’s hand go and walked up to her. She looked as beautiful as ever. Her hair, dark chocolate brown, hanging in loose natural curls over her shoulders. Her eyes a bright green, so green you would almost think that she must have contacts in, but she didn’t. Her skin was pale, almost white as snow…snow white, as I often called her when we were growing up. She was gorgeous, and I certainly noticed when we were in high school. Our secret world that we had built with each other was something we never even talked about. There was no discussion and when we hit our senior year, life simply pushed us apart, but now, well, here she was, standing before me as pretty as ever. She smiled, her pinkish full lips parting as my eyes inadvertently looked at them. She grabbed me and the hug was tight and meaningful as she whispered into my ear.
“I am so, so, sorry Jazz, I heard about your dad. I just…I don’t know what to say.”
She held onto me and then she glanced up at Cody who was watching us very closely. She grinned and let me go, but her hands still rested on my arms.
“Thank you,” I said to her as she let her eyes glance behind me and I turned and looked at Cody. I turned back to Jess and tried to smile. “That is Cody, he is…”
“Gorgeous,” she whispered as she leaned in close to my face. I nodded to her as she let me go and walked to him. She extended a hand and he grinned as he took her small pale hand into his own. She shook it with more strength than he expected her to have.
“I am Jess Jarvis and you are?” she asked him as she continued to shake his hand. He stopped her and lifted her hand up to his mouth and kissed it as her eyebrow rose. She glanced back at me as I crossed my arms on my chest and shrugged my shoulders. “A gentleman, I see,” she added as his lips left her hand and he smiled.
“Cody Baker.”
She tilted her head, “So, Cody Baker, how long have you been with Jazz?”
He laughed as I stepped up next to her and bumped her shoulder. “She is messing with you, I am sure Jess knows the grilling my mom put you through.” He looked into her eyes and then back to me.
“Well worth it.” He added as he let Jess’s hand go and she glanced at me.
“Where did you find him and are there anymore?” I laughed as she looked back up at him.
“I have one brother, but I have to let you down gently and just say that he is married, with children.”
“Really?” I asked him as his eyes darted to mine and Jess stared at me, curious as to why I did not know that bit of information.
“Yes. He got married about five years ago, I think.”
“You think?” Jess asked and he smiled at her.
“Well, we are not exactly…close.”
“Ahhhh,” she said as it satisfied her insatiable need to know everything. She was always like that in school, too. She was not a gossiper by trade, but a collector of information nonetheless.
“You have nice lips, I bet you are a good kisser.”
“Jess,” I said as I rolled my eyes. She laughed and then looked back at him.
“I am,” he said, without hesitation, and I could not disagree.
“As good as me?” she asked, as she glanced at me. My cheeks reddened. Cody said nothing, but I am sure he is smart enough to understand an insinuation.
“Huh,” he said as she wrapped her arm into my own and pulled me through the black gates into the center garden. Cody rubbed his neck a couple of times and then followed us, enjoying his new revelation about me and my apparent need to not mention it.
Thank you and I do hope you enjoyed this preview of “Stardust”. It will be releasing on Amazon August 17th, 2014 with Hot Ink Press. Thank you again to L.P. Dover for graciously allowing a sample of my work to be shared in her book. I do appreciate it, as always.
Xoxo ~Rue