by Janet Dailey
"When did this happen?" Lillian was still trying to take it all in.
"This morning. I talked to Todd just a few minutes ago," Barbara explained.
"Where is he?" Lillian glanced toward the archway.
"He's putting my luggage in the car."
"What did Jock have to say?" To herself, she added, no wonder he left the house in such a temper this morning.
"Nothing. He doesn't know I'm leaving," Barbara admitted and took the cup from the woman to sip at its hot contents.
"He doesn't know?" Lillian repeated. "Aren't you going to tell him goodbye?"
"No. I don't see any point," she answered, shrugging.
"But surely—"
"I have chosen neither of your sons. They both know it," Barbara replied. Jock just didn't happen to fully believe it, and she didn't want to get caught in the trap of trying to convince him. "Todd asked me to have some coffee and juice ready for him."
Lillian began pouring another cup. "You are leaving right away?"
"Yes. It will be more comfortable driving if we go before the sun is too hot." She pretended that was the reason.
Todd came striding into the dining room, brushing his hands in a gesture of finished work. "That didn't take long. Is that my coffee?" He glanced at the cup his mother was filling.
"Yes. Barbara has just told me she's leaving. You surely weren't planning to leave without something to eat?" Lillian protested.
"We'll catch a bite along the way," Todd shrugged.
"Nonsense!" Lillian dismissed that immediately. "There are some Danish pastries in the kitchen. You are at least going to eat that before you leave."
"I'm not really hungry," Barbara protested.
"It doesn't pay to argue with her," Todd inserted. "She'll get her own way. She always does."
"Todd is right," Lillian agreed with him.
"Go get the pastries, mother," he ordered.
"I won't be a minute," she promised and rose from the table to go to the kitchen.
"Pour me some orange juice, will you, Barbara?" Todd requested.
She poured him a glass and one for herself. It had seemed churlish to argue about the sweet rolls, but she disliked even that small delay. Sitting in the chair next to Todd's, she set his glass in front of him and drank from hers.
Chapter Eleven
AT LILLIAN'S INSISTENCE, Barbara double-checked her room to be certain she hadn't left any of her belongings behind. There was nothing in the room that belonged to her, except some memories that she knew would follow.
Todd and his mother were waiting in the foyer as she descended the steps. Barbara felt awkward when the older woman came forward to hug her goodbye. There was apprehension in Lillian's brown eyes when she stepped back.
"Goodbye, dear. I would have liked to have you for a daughter-in-law," she said.
"Goodbye, Lillian." Barbara didn't return the comment by saying she would have liked Lillian as her mother-in-law, because it was all academic at this point.
"Ready?" Todd opened one of the double doors for her. "I'll be back sometime late this afternoon, mother."
"All right."
Barbara paused in the courtyard to look back and wave a hand to the woman before Todd stepped out and closed the door. He walked to her side. Guilt made her say again, "You don't have to drive me back, Todd." He took her arm as they passed the fountain in the courtyard. The sound of the falling water reminded Barbara of tears. Todd's car was parked in front. He reached ahead of her to open the passenger door.
"What's this message all about, Todd?" Jock's voice demanded.
Barbara whirled to see him stalking from the veranda through the courtyard toward them. Her gaze jerked back at Todd to accuse him, how could you? Her mind had already leaped to the conclusion that Todd had let his brother know she was leaving.
"Antonia came to the stable with some garbled message from mother that Barbara was leaving," Jock continued, evidently not seeing her standing on the other side of the car door until he had emerged from the courtyard.
Lillian had sent the message, not Todd. Barbara realized she should have known better. Either way the damage was done. Jock's piercing eyes were narrowing on her as awareness sunk in like an angry thundercloud that the message hadn't been garbled.
"It's true," Barbara confirmed. "I am leaving."
"Without letting me know? Without even a goodbye?" he accused.
"How many times do we have to say it?" she countered. His gaze sliced to her left hand. "I gave the ring back to Todd. I told you I was going to."
"You've told me a lot of things, and your actions have told me a lot more. You aren't leaving, Barbara," Jock stated.
"Leave me alone, Jock. Just let me go?" She turned to slide onto the car seat.
"Not this time." His hand seized her arm in a punishing grip. "I'm not letting you go. We're going to talk this out."
"No." Barbara strained against his grip and appealed to Todd. "Todd, I want to leave."
"You aren't going anywhere unless I say so." Jock didn't give his brother a chance to reply. "Todd knows that one word from me and every exit from this ranch will have a man posted at the gate within minutes. You couldn't leave Sandoval land without being stopped. You are going to talk to me."
"He's right, Barbara," Todd offered quietly.
She flashed Jock a mutinous look to conceal the pain inside. "It looks as if I don't have any choice."
"You don't."
His sun-browned features were set in hard lines as he pulled her away from the car and pushed her ahead of him toward the house. This was a confrontation Barbara hadn't wanted and she took advantage of these few minutes without conversation to prepare her defenses, meager as they were. In the house Jock directed her to the small, wood-paneled den and closed the door.
"Why are you leaving?" he demanded, squaring her around so she faced him. His hands were hard on her shoulders.
"Because there isn't any reason to stay," she retorted stiffly, keeping the inner tremors out of her voice.
"I want you to stay. Isn't that a reason?"
"Not a good enough one." Her gaze wavered under the blazing force of his.
The answer earned her a hard shake. "Not good enough, is it? You've got me half out of my mind and it isn't good enough," Jock muttered savagely. "Haven't I made it obvious how much I want you? I've done nothing but think about you day and night—"
"Stop it!" She cut across his words with an angry protest. "Six months, Jock! You never gave me a thought for six months! I didn't get so much as a telephone call or a postcard from you! Don't try to make me believe that you were all tied up in knots all this time! You never even tried to reach me!"
"No, I didn't!" he shouted. "I'm not in the habit of going begging to a woman to ask her to love me."
"I'm sure you don't have to. You can get all the women you want with a snap of your fingers, so leave me alone!" Barbara cried in agitation.
"But I want you!"
"To be what? Your friend? Or your lover?" She hurled at him the words that had wounded her so deeply. "You can't make up your mind, can you? If I stay, how long will it be before you suggest we be friends again? Three days? Four?"
"Friends?" Jock frowned. "You're damned right I want you to be my friend. I want a wife that is more than a lover. I want someone who will be at my side, not just in my bed!"
The one single word stole all of Barbara's hurt anger. It seemed like a shining light, flickering uncertainly to guide her through the darkness. She stared at him, fearful—hopeful.
"Your wife?" she repeated in a breathy murmur.
"Yes, my wife," Jock snapped.
"You…never said anything about that before," Barbara whispered, waiting for him to blow out the light that was burning brighter with each second.
"I didn't?" The hardness began leaving his chiseled features. "I took it for granted—"
With a sobbing cry of joy, Barbara wrapped her arms around him to hug him tightly. She bit at her
lip, wanting to laugh and cry at the same time and unwilling to do either as she cherished this moment.
"Honey?" He cupped her face in his hands and lifted it so he could see the happiness brimming in her eyes. "What did you think I was proposing? I love you. Of course I want you to be my wife."
"Of course, he says." Laughter bubbled in her throat. "When you asked me to come with you to the ranch and I refused, I thought you just wanted me for my…loving companionship."
"I wanted you to meet my mother, to see our home, where our children will live, and the ranch. I wanted us to have some time to get to know each other," Jock explained in a husky voice. "You have to admit the few short days we were together, we crammed in a lot of loving and little else."
"And I thought you were only offering me an illicit relationship," she breathed. "And I nearly accepted. I would have if you had asked me again, because I loved you so much I didn't care."
"Imagine how I felt when I suggested we get acquainted and you told me, in no uncertain terms, that you didn't want to get better acquainted with me?" Jock countered, able to smile at the thought now. "Here was the woman I wanted for my wife—and all she wanted was a carefree weekend in bed with no strings. She didn't sound like a likely candidate for motherhood, not of my children."
"When you suggested we be friends instead of lovers, I thought you were letting me down easy—that you were tired of me."
"Tired of you? That will be the day!" Bending his head, he found her mouth and kissed her with a deep hunger that had her heart spinning.
All rights reserved, including without limitation the right to reproduce this ebook or any portion thereof in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of the publisher.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, events, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 1980 by Janet Dailey
Cover design by Open Road Integrated Media
ISBN 978-1-4976-1837-4
This edition published in 2014 by Open Road Integrated Media, Inc.
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